Reviews for Corrupt the Midwife

BY : JayDee


  • From Thundercloud on October 20, 2019

    I checked this story despite never have watched the actual show since you mentioned it features Shannon. I am glad I did because it was clearly a worthwhile read. Not that the story feature much of Shannon even if you used the character well.

    The setup with the cursed bike was quite fun and the dream sequences a clever way to allow you do pairings that I suspect are not realistic considering the show. It of courrse gets a bit repetitive when you have realized the formula, but the one in chapter 5 with wooden cross was really hot. That scene could have benefit from getting expanded if you ask me.

    My only complaint would be that the ending felt a bit cheap...after all these scenes when she resist tempatation they suddenly has sex. It is in itself a good ending with leaving them as a couple, but it does not IMHO mesh well with the rest of the story.

    If I might come with a suggestion I think it would be possible to revise the ending in a slightly fun way...what if it not really Trixie at the end but a shape shifting Shannon?

    Shannon feeling that it would it would be a shame getting all that lust lost comes there and seduce her. Chummmy feels fooled but ultimativly Shannon failed to make surrender her soul so this was just Shannon getting overcome with desire for lust and failing her job.

    As a final twist Shannon says that she selected all partners for dream sequences based on whom who secretly feels attracted to Chummy and could be convinced to have f/f sex if the circumstances are right. Chummy is left with if she can live without the experience of girl on girl sex or if it is too dangerous to try it.



    Report Review


  • From pippychick on February 25, 2019

    Part Six and Seven

    Being unavoidably delayed in reading and reviewing this, I wanted to stop and ensure that I left a note on each chapter, but after reading part six I had to see what happens next.

    I wonder now what would have happened had Chummy given in and took the Shannon girl/thing up on the offer. I really like themes of corruption, especially if the character involved "loses" but in fact, feels like they've ended up on the winning side. I think when they surrender, they can never know what it would have been like the other way. There are prices and rewards no matter what people do.

    I'm so glad it ended with my favourite, Trixie. I loved the mention of Monica Joan (honestly, that character is wasted as a nun). But more than anything, I really do like the ending. If there could be an improvement on Call the Midwife, it'd be seeing what all of those midwives get up to in their rooms while the nuns float serenely about outside. You've given me a little glimpse of that, and I love it.

    Oh, and I have to say that was excellent work on the prompts.

    I think I'll be revisiting this story occasionally. Thank you for sharing your talent with us. You made me smile, laugh, and all the good things. :)



    Report Review


  • From pippychick on February 25, 2019

    Part Five

    So... something has revealed itself at last, though I'm not sure it's a demon. Nothing like a bit of blasphemy, but I sense the 'spirit' isn't so much evil as it just doesn't care about that stuff. Chummy is a little distressed by it, though. If I were her, I'd just take full advantage, lol... but then I wonder if that is it, and all of this is some kind of lesson? I'm not willing to accept that the thing means her harm as yet (if it had I think the bicycle would have crashed for real), though it's definitely having fun with her.

    Hmm... questions....

    Onto the next one!



    Report Review


  • From pippychick on February 25, 2019

    Part Four

    Oh, man, this is a fabulous read... although I suspect that's partly because I quite fancy a bit of Trixie myself. I don't feel sorry for Chummy at all here, though it's becoming clearer that she's been singled out for torment (or something).

    I'm catching up on this story before the actual 'Call the Midwife' which is waiting on iplayer. I adore this so much, and your writing is a thrilling antidote.

    Thank you for writing, and for sharing. This is awesome, and I'm heading straight to the next one! :)



    Report Review


  • From InBrightestDay on February 08, 2019

    Chapters 6 & 7

    And so we have reached the...erm...climax.  Well, technically 6 was the climax and 7 was more of an epilogue, but still.

    Shannon again manages to come across as somewhat creepy here, especially that "I was never born" line, which is a nice little way of describing her inhuman nature.

    Serious credit must be given to this line:

    My God created pleasure, don’t you know, one doubts there was ever sin in taking it when no harm was done.

    Thank you!  There's this really annoying trope that pops up in erotic fiction where the good guys, especially in fantasy stories or stories featuring religion, feel that sex is sinful in some way, apparently forgetting that, assuming God created the universe and all the living things in it, then He invented sexual reproduction so...obviously it isn't evil.  There are sins related to sex, of course (rape, adultery, etc.), but the act itself isn't one.

    I did a little bit of research on the characters, and I'm pretty sure Chummy actually has a husband.  I don't know if Trixie is bi, but then again this is a femslash story, so I should probably just ignore all that.

    Overall, I don't think this was bad.  It gets a bit repetitive partway through, but pulls itself out of that by Chapter 5.  The sex might not be your best work, but I still enjoyed the story and think it was worth reading.



    Report Review


  • From InBrightestDay on February 07, 2019

    Chapters 4 & 5

    Things started to get a little repetitive in Chapter 4, if only because by now we all know how the formula works (Chummy meets up with one of the cast, they start having sex and it turns out not to be real), but Chapter 5 changes things a little, in that she's actually catching on now.  Nothing in these made me laugh like the hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia thing previously, though I did end up learning what a carnifex was, so I am gaining knowledge from reading this.

    Also, I know it was just because of the prompt, but that bit with Cynthia bending over and scuttling up the wall was surprisingly creepy.  That and the whole "masturbating with the crucifix" thing made me feel for a moment like I was watching an exorcism movie.



    Report Review


  • From InBrightestDay on February 03, 2019

    Since these chapters are farily short, I'm going to just review two at a time from here on out.

    Chapters 2&3

    Chummy found herself lead inside, barely noticing how deserted the large building seemed, until Jenny was sitting her down upon a bed. She blinked through her glasses at her fellow midwife, and started to protest that she would be fine as Jenny reached down, calm as she liked, and pulled her uniform dress up over her head.

    “Now see here, Jenny, I don’t know-”

    Jenny pulled Chummy’s hands onto her bared body and kissed her.

    Well...that escalated quickly.  I know this is a sex fic, but even so—

    “I say… What?”

    Chummy stood outside Nonnatus House, the bicycle at her hip. There had been no stumble, no inadvertent breast fondling. Jenny turned away from looking at the bicycle and strode off with a backwards wave.

    Ah.  That makes considerably more sense.

    Chapter 3 made me laugh quite a few times.  The first time was for rather stupid reasons, I admit.  Certain, for lack of a better term "British-isms" make me laugh, one of which is "Gorblimey", but the most potent is...

    “Eh? You what?”

    I always laugh at that phrase.  It's a totally normal expression, I know, but maybe because of the "U wot m8" meme or maybe just because I imagine an angry pub patron going "You wha'?" in a cockney accent, it always makes me laugh.  Like I said, a dumb reason, since that wasn't actually a joke.

    The second laugh, however...

    Chummy wasn’t deterred by the dead writers’ occasional sesquipedalianism. No sufferer from hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia, she.

    I know that's just you using the prompt, but it's still hilarious.

    On a non-funny note, the little bit of detective work done on the street and Shannon is actually a little creepy, and if you're not already familiar with Shannon it's a nice bit of misdirection, since it kind of makes it look like this might be a ghost story.



    Report Review


  • From InBrightestDay on February 02, 2019

    Chapter 1

    So I was hitherto unaware of the existence of this show, and thus don't really know any of its characters.  Nonetheless, this was pretty funny.  Knowing that this is Shannon makes the Irishness really amusing, like she's playing it way up.

    Also, knowing Shannon...

    Saddle seemed the wrong shape.

    This is a magical Sybian, isn't it?

    The shape of the thing, and the undeniable fact that it vibrated all the more as she went faster across the cobbles, was having an effect through sensible skirt and even more sensible unmentionables.

    I knew it!



    Report Review


  • From swirlingdoubt on November 29, 2018

    These midwives are trollops, the whole lot of em!

    You've built a good theme, and perhaps is more on th PWP side, but you give yourself plenty of room to develop it however you wish. It is still a carnal treat, besides. Poor chummy, will she ever get her O? If you don't "finish" the story that would be some good irony that I'd hate you for. :P



    Report Review


  • From pippychick on November 19, 2018

    Oh, Chummy is in for it now... a mystery to solve, all the while having to ride the bike around getting more and more wound up. Perfect! :D

    I was going to review each chapter, but that cliffhanger after the bike ride was such that I had to see what would happen next. You made this reader very happy. :)

    But also, this is hilarious, and Chummy is so in character that I can just see it all happening in my mind. I wonder why the Shannon girl has decided to pick on her? Is it for fun, or is there something more to all of this? Hmm...

    Have to say I loved the idea of “saving” that young eighteen-year-old from the bike's... effects. It's all extremely well thought out. I wonder if she'll get Fred to take a look at it, and get all disconcerted when he says: “Well, what's wrong with it? Ride it about the yard so's I can see.” *giggles* This is so good, though. Even better than I imagined when I urged you to write it.

    I also want to say that your use of language is spot on. I really appreciate the work that goes into that. It keeps the environment in character, as well as Chummy.

    Please, please continue!!!



    Report Review


  • From BronxWench on November 09, 2018

    Chapter 2:

    My, my, that's certainly an interesting bike. Bright blue, and mind control, too? Or is Chummy quite capable of delirious acts of imagination sufficient to make her pursue Jenny?

    I'm thoroughly captivated, and I think I can count on one hand the number of times I've said that about femmeslash. Well done, and more, please? :D



    Report Review


  • From swirlingdoubt on November 09, 2018

    The dialogue for Chap 2 really put it over the top. Peachy keen, jellybean!



    Report Review


  • From swirlingdoubt on November 07, 2018

    Jesus JayDee. Your brain is twisted in the most delightful way.

    I watched one episode of this series a couple years ago and was bored. If only it had more indecent interludes and cheap tricks, it would be much more engaging. If I were to offer some constructive, uh, something - it would be great if you play up the embarassment over immodesty even more. I think that is what will really get this fic off. :P

    Awaiting chapter 2. "Oh, my petticoat!"

     

     



    Report Review


  • From LordWolfe on October 31, 2018

    Absolutely love this; the period language used, and the fetish of being pleasured by a bicycle is always one I've liked, though sadly rare. I'd love to see you write some Downton Abbey stuff sometime, as an aside!



    Report Review


  • From BronxWench on October 31, 2018

    I will confess I've never actually watched this show, but I simply can't resist your take on things. Now if only bicycles like that really existed. I might even bestir myself to ride... LOL!



    Report Review