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Reviews for Crash Dummy

By : BehrBeMine
  • From ANON - Lynn on July 09, 2007
    It is my costume to always give the most critical review I can, regardless of the story's merit or fandom. This is because I am a writer myself, and always appreciate constructive criticism much more then the ZOMG plz update reviews. So here is my account of your story: its flaws and virtues.

    The Good- The premise, as far as I am aware, is slightly uncommon. The story sported no obvious grammatical errors. It is written in an engaging style. I love how sometimes, the past and the present blend so perfectly that you can't tell them apart. The story sticks to the characterizations of both Lorelai and Chris without distorting the snappy banter and witty references that characterize the show. However, it also holds a deep current on nostalgia, pain, and regret. Another thing I liked was how Luke was hardly mentioned, but his presence resonated throughout the present portions of the fic.

    The Bad- You fail to mention something that is so integral to the Lorelai/Christopher relationship, whatever form it may be in: Rory. Though their bond degraded somewhat over the past few seasons, no interaction between Lorelai and Christopher can ever take place without Rory being a factor in it, however minor it may be. As I said before, I admire the way Luke's presence was felt; though I suspect you attempted to do the same with Rory, you were unfortunatly unsuccessful. Another thing I absolutely abhor in any fanfic is the use of poetry or song lyrics throughout the chapters. It breaks the flow of the story. I believe that an author should have the skills to illustrate whatever the lyrics are saying without their interjection. Also, the summary was largely unrelated to the story. I admit I thought it was a Lane/Dave fic before I clicked on the link.

    The Ugly- While the sex scenes had some wonderful metaphors, the mechanical part was painfully awkward to read. I giggled a little when Christopher's penis was referred to as his organ.


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  • From Leta on April 21, 2007
    damn. Do i need to comfirm it to you? that was great, characters great, story great, writing form great. I beg you email me when you have written another chapter, IT ANNOYS ME SO MUCH THAT I CANT FAV THE WONDERFUL STORIES I FIND ON AFF.NET!
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