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Reviews for Kal El

By : alysonlindley
  • From JohnSlayer on June 13, 2008
    Love Chapter 30! I just updated "Fracture" with a new chapter called "Reverse". I'm going to update our little fanfic soon! Just wanted to let you know! Take care and keep up the good fic work!
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  • From shatzen83 on May 17, 2008
    Haven't seen an update for a long time, I liked this one. We need more hotness thiese days on the forum, so I can't wait the next installment.
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  • From Kip on May 02, 2008
    Sorry if English is not your first language (in which case, 'bravo' for a magnificent effort), but this is a reasonable story and could potentially be really good; if you could resolve some niggling inconsistencies.

    Having read through 4 chapters, what comes over most strongly is not, unfortunately, the story, which is what you are obviously hoping to impart, but the fact that you either can't or aren't using tenses properly, plus you have a habit of shoving commas in where none are needed...

    I genuinely like your idea, and the direction that you're taking the characters, but it's very hard going to read something that has this many distractions within the text.

    If grammar and punctuation aren't your thing (which they aren't for everyone) then might I suggest you take on the services of a Beta reader and leave yourself free to do the creative stuff? You're currently expecting us (your readers) to do the work that you, as the writer, should be doing.

    'Purr



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  • From JohnSlayer on April 24, 2008
    I love this newest chapter! I got Fracture updated with a new chapter.
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  • From shatzen83 on April 10, 2008
    A quarrel finally, good make them angry then make them solve the problem in horizontal position.
    I always thought Clark is the cook in this house, cause Lois can't cook anything properly.
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  • From shatzen83 on April 07, 2008
    WHat is it with thiose little girls in your stories? Seriously she has to have a reason in it, can't wait to find out.

    I like when the sex scenes are close to reality, you are doing it so well. It's not hard to write a highlight in one's life, thought these kind of stories tend to be very cheesy. But to write a steamy sex scene under an old shower with low pressure and a kid behind a wall, well that's a piece of art. I enjoyed this very much.
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  • From JohnSlayer on April 05, 2008
    This last chapter is interesting. I updated Obsession... be it with a short chapter, IMO.

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  • From shatzen83 on April 05, 2008
    The update is awesome, can't wait for the rest of the plot (and some smut)
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  • From JohnSlayer on April 03, 2008
    WOW! Had some time on my hands to read the other chapters, and they're muy MUY caliente! LOL
    Updated "Kara Zor-El", hopefully will update all of them in a couple of days.
    Keep on going, you're doing great!
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  • From shatzen83 on April 02, 2008
    No screaming Lois, there's a kid in a house :-)
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  • From shatzen83 on April 01, 2008
    I want an update :-)
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  • From shatzen83 on March 30, 2008
    A husband swap with Lex? I have this big hangover so don't pay much attention to what I'm writing. Nice chapter, the plot is revealing.
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  • From shatzen83 on March 29, 2008
    Away town in business, man I missed the story :-)
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  • From shatzen83 on March 27, 2008
    The rethorical question it was, the answer I should feed my husband with Ewd Kryptonite then, ,lol.
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  • From shatzen83 on March 26, 2008
    short steamy sexy, definitely.
    Like my private life, except for steamy and sexy, dammed yuppie corporate life. Seriously how can they find time to have so much sex, lol?
    Love that part, can't wait for an update.
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