Reviews for For The NorthBy : kmrn2009 |
IT IS ABSOLUTELY WRONG to say that there was "no real threat of encountering thieves" because the land was "sparse"!This is A NONSENSE!The correct term in this case would have been DESERTED or RAVAGED,not "sparse"!Besides,even if they would have encountered some thieves,THEY WOULD HAVE HAD NO PROBLEM WITH THAT!Yara was A WARRIOR and Sansa had Brienne TO PROTECT HER!Not to mention the fact that THERE WAS NO REAL REASON for encountering thieves in the North!
And the mistake from above ISN'T AT ALL the only writing mistake in this story!THERE ARE PLENTY OF THEM,from spelling to usage of words!So,YOU CLEARLY AREN'T "a great writer, and we don't see nearly enough of you",as someone SO WRONGLY SAYS!On the contrary,YOU HAVE A LOT TO IMPROVE and WE DEFINITELY SEE ENOUGH of you!
You picked up a good concept , if you make it longer and more detailed you can make a good piece of fan fiction. Waiting for next chapters.
Fun and very hot, but I wish it was longer, and was the start of a series. You're a great writer, and we don't see nearly enough of you. I mean, if this remains a one-shot it's still good, but I would have liked to have seen Yara fuck Sansa up the arse after fucking her cunt. Or to see it in a sequel. Again it just seems a shame to leave it there, especially because I haven't seen this scenario before.
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