Click Here!

  • 1

Reviews for one night in paradise

By : benoitsbaby
  • From ElementalDemonessSorceress on September 09, 2007
    I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - alex on November 21, 2004
    nex t time you should try using sentences. you realize that entire story was in 2 sentences. take an english class and then maybe you can try writing another story.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Lily on July 01, 2004
    I think this was the worst story I have ever read and it was the worst described sex-scene I ever read and your writing has to improve more as the Mount Everest is high and I am in a very bad mood today so I have to say that this story sucked and your first sentence was going over six lines and you used the word and about a hundred times and I leave now because this is really stupid....
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Nate on May 21, 2004
    I'm going to be blunt; this story is unsalvagable. It's clear you have no sexual experience at all, and all of your images of the act come from fractured fairy tales. Besides the total eradication of any punctuation or capitalization, comparing the act ofl sel sex to a Slurpee is unacceptable. The sex I saw in that episode was beyond anything passionate or erotic, it had all the makings of Rory/Dean's relationship; Victorian, dull, boring and unworthy of a girl such as herself, I wouldn't be surprised if none of their clothes came off except to fit part A into B for sex that's only worthy for a morning quickie. I suggest pulling this story off the site and waiting to write sexfic until you have more experience and many more writing skills. Betrayal and adultery, no matter how many flowery and positive words you used for it, is wrong.
    Report Review

  • 1
T.O.S. | Content Guidelines | DMCA Info | F.A.Q. | Facebook | Tumblr | Abuse | Support | Contact | Donate

Click Here!