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Reviews for A Long Line of Mistakes

By : coffeeaddict
  • From Freakey on February 04, 2007
    how 'bout an up-date?
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  • From ANON - Anon on January 10, 2007
    great story


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  • From ANON - Emanuel on September 18, 2006
    So far this is a very entertaining story. Your character portrayals are good, the storyline very pausible. I'd like to read more - please update!
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  • From MW007 on January 14, 2006
    Very well done. Classy. Nice work.





    Mike
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  • From ANON - TwilightPro101 on November 03, 2005
    Please continue this story! Things were just getting very, very, very interesting and I was loving Paris/Lorleai.
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  • From ANON - Loralei=Ladiesgirl on September 08, 2005
    I like your storyline, however you need to work on your grammar and spelling a bit. The linebreaks are very good, it's easy to read and all in all a descent story.
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  • From ANON - Honey on May 28, 2005
    ey there, come on update!
    that story is really original pairing
    I just hope you will put a lot of nasty, naughty, sex play between Lorelai and paris.
    I mean REALLY REALLY REALLY NASTY NAUGHTY!!!! if you know what I mean!
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  • From ANON - Shadows of Faith on May 14, 2005
    HEY HEY HEY HEY NOOOO CLIFFHANGER PLEASE CONTINURE PLEASE THIS IS ME ON MY KNEES BEGGING PLEASE!!!!!

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  • From Faith5x5 on April 14, 2005
    PLEASE, PLEASE update soon!! I want to find out what happens over the weekend between Paris and Lorelai! Something naughty I hope. ;)
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  • From on March 26, 2005
    There's a hell of a lot I like about this story. For one, it's a Lorelai/Paris pairing, which is something different, and very cool. And I like how it's progressed slowly, with Rory as nothing but a befuddled bystander. I can tell that English is not your native language, mostly in the verb and adverb syntax. The perfectionist in me stops and rewrites it as it would normally be spoken or written. For me at least, it slows the pace of the story down, as my reading slows down. But regardless all the elements of a great story are here, and I look forward to more from Lorelai and Paris.
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  • From ANON - Faith5x5 on March 10, 2005
    Awesome! Can't wait for more.. :)
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  • From ANON - Miss_Lionesse on March 10, 2005
    honestly, i love this story. I had enough of reading male-female stuff.....so a couple of months ago....i became more interesting in female-female relationship.
    Lorelai seems to have a little bit of affection reserved for Paris
    i hope that when you descripe your sexual scenes, it should be a rough but still very very much love in it.
    you should make lorelai give paris all the love she never had. it should be very sensual and lovely but ROUGH!!!!!!!!!!!VERY ROUGH! once it starts.
    at the beginning, im guessing it's paris's first time so Lorelai could go slowly on her. then when it starts....hum.........no hold back.
    don,t stop.
    maybe you could also write something with Lorelai-rory. And no it's not disgusting. we're talking pure love here.
    if you have any stories like this, please, feel free to email me or if you have i dont know, something with my post....
    honey_wally@yahoo.com
    i would love to discuss this with you
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  • From ANON - Nate (Co-Mod at GGSlash, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/gilmoregirlsslash ) on March 09, 2005
    I tried to review this at FF.net, but they were down and your email wasn't up there. Thankfully it's here and I can give you a review.

    First of all, BB on FF.net is a moron. This story was far from awful, it was very inspired. At first going in I thought I was going to read another rote Lorelai/Luke fic because of your description, but this story proves that the summary might not draw you in, but the words will. I was so pleased to discover this was a Paris/Lorelai story as the first chapter went along. I've read some L/P and they haven't been able to perfect them as a couple quite yet. But you made it wonderful with the flashback to the night before; Paris going through the video collection, and the both of them debating things in the way they did, they're both born arguers. Using the videos and Lorelai's underlying choices as a trigger for her to start to question things, that was a good move. The conversation they had was natural, and I think you showed Lorelai's empathy for Paris' life very well in her thoughts.

    As I read more and more into this, I found myself liking it. I'm usually a Paris/Rory shipper (I write Longing...), and the previous L/P stories have been lacking the the two women's dark humor and views on life, Lorelai with her happy-go-lucky style, and Paris' more cynical view. Somehow they came together in this argument, and ended up in a kiss that changed how both of them saw things in their lives. We don't know how Paris feels yet, and I don't know how you plan the next chapters, but I definitely want to read them. This is a great story, and I liked how everything closed with Lorelai in the diner feeling weird and not in the mood for her usual Luke-teasing or her breakfast. She's just thinking about Paris...and if those small sparks in her are true. You have me thinking about what's happening for them in the future, how Rory will take it, and what they'll be doing with this attraction.

    I'd like to invite you to post this on the GilmoreGirlsSlash Yahoo group I co-mod ( http://groups.yahoo.com/group/gilmoregirlsslash ), we're always looking for more femslash to read, and especially in other couplings besides Rory/Paris. This is great work, and the only thing I'd probably ask is that you do a grammar check; the sentence "Bound? I didn’t expect you to watch this kind of movies." should've had 'these' instead of 'this'. Since you're from Germany though, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt since the story around it is so good it almost negates that small quibble of mine.

    Email me back; I'd really like to hear from you and maybe chat :)!
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  • From ANON - Faith5x5 on March 09, 2005
    Oo.. I'm liking this so far. I can't wait to see what happens next! Keep up the good work, and update soon. :)
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