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Wash Up Before Having Your Turkish Delights	By : FairySlayer Category: S through Z > Two and A Half Men Views: 2967 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own and have no claim to the TV series "Two and a Half Men" (though I wish I did 'cause it's awesome); I receive no money or other compensation of any kind for this writing.

Chapter List
- 1-Wash Up Before Having Your Turkish Delights
- 1
This flashfic was written for the AFFN weekly prompt challenge Turkey (week 7, 21-November-2010). Find other entries on the forum:

http://www2.adult-fanfiction.org/forum/index.php/topic/17230-week-7-11-21-10/

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"This is really nice of you, Charlie," Alan Harper almost giggled while the brothers walked through the ancient stone doorway into the half-lit 'hot room' of the bath house. "I've always wanted to try a Turkish bath." Alan had a towel clutched tightly around his waist as he nearly bent over as he walked and was carrying a few more. "But did you really have to tip the attendant so much? It made my tip look cheap by comparison."
"Your tip was cheap, comparison or not," Charlie nearly groaned. He walked slowly, casually, without a care about being butt naked.
He lifted one knee to get up and lie on the 'tummy stone' when Alan suddenly cried out, "Wait! You're not getting on that thing without a towel, are you?"
Charlie sneered. "Come on Alan. You can't expect me to get a full body massage if they can't get at my full body, Alan."
"It just seems very unsanitary is all I'm saying," Alan retorted while carefully laying another towel out across his stone. "A massage is meant to relax the muscles that you use most, not..." He stopped short and looked to Charlie. The older Harper's eyes briefly widened as he swayed his pelvis slightly forward.
Alan thought for a second. "Point taken," admitted before he finished covering his stone.
Charlie sighed, shook his head, and then simply lied face down on the hot, bare marble. He closed his eyes and relaxed for a moment until he heard Alan grunting and bitching to himself. Charlie carefully turned his head and opened his eyes.
Alan kept trying to climb up on his stone, but every time he put any pressure down with his hands or knees the towels slid and made him slip and fall. Charlie was about to close his eyes again until Alan slammed forward and banged his crotch against the hard edge of the table. Alan noisily sucked wind and slowly slid to the floor, banging his head against the table's edge as his butt hit the floor.
Now intrigued, Charlie turned onto his side and rested on his elbow as he kept watching his little brother's antics. Finally Alan backed up and made a running start, jumping onto the stone. He landed on his hands and knees, but that lasted only for a flicker as the towels slide out in every direction. Alan fell hard on his front as his arms and legs splayed out over the sides of his stone table. He let out a long, pained groan.
"You thought I was being unsanitary but now you're trying to hump your table?"
"Ha ha, very funny," Alan snapped at first, but then his tone softened. "Well, I guess you're right and I should just try to enjoy the massage." He made an eww! face but then settled onto his table.
"You better, considering how much I'm paying for it!"
"And again, thank you," Alan offered. "You know, you've been awfully generous lately: first paying for Jake to come on his class trip here to Turkey and then volunteering to be a chaperone too."
"Don't forget that I also paid your way," Charlie reminded him as he lied flat again.
A fat, hairy Turkish man wearing only knee-length shorts and a headdress entered and, after letting out an unfriendly grunt, went over to Alan.
"Yes, that too," Alan quietly acknowledged as the man started roughly pressing his fingers into his back, making him wince with pain. Alan tried to maintain the conversation anyway, "So anyway, what's in it for you?"
Three women in full robes entered and went over to Charlie's table, making Alan's eyes bulge as much from jealousy as from the painful massage. The women giggled and only ran their dainty hands up and down Charlie's body for a few seconds, but then all three suddenly dropped their coverings, revealing all of their delicious dark skin, tightly toned bodies and radiantly smiling faces. One laid across his back and the other over his buttocks and legs; they each rubbed them up and down as much with their lovely faces and sizeable breasts as they did with their hands.
The third picked up a pot and stuck her hand in before using it to slather the perfumed oil between Charlie and his other two masseuses. She made sure to work it between his bum cheeks and dug in deep, making him push up slightly on his hands and knees. She poured a trickle of oil down inside his ass crack as she made sure to get his member hard and slick.
The other two girls helped him up and then all three led him towards a private room.
"Hey, how come you...?" Alan spat between pained grunts.
"I told you should have tipped better, Alan," Charlie answered without looking back. "And with the exchange rate you won't believe what I can get these girls to do for under a thousand bucks, even if most of it's probably illegal here."
Alan's tight voice dripped with jealousy as he called after his brother, "You'd better be careful or you might end up in a Turkish prison!"
"That may be true, Alan," Charlie called back over his shoulder, "but even that still beats spending Thanksgiving dinner with mom."
Alan lied there with his mouth open, seemingly oblivious to the near pummeling he was taking. Finally he blinked and nodded quickly. "Again, point taken."
- 1
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Wash Up Before Having Your Turkish Delights