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Reality of Nightmares	By : AshleyTrecartin Category: 1 through F > Doctor Who Views: 1382 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who, all characters mentioned are under the ownership of the BBC. I do not make any profit off of the work that follows.

Chapter List
- 1-Reality of Nightmares
- 1
The Reality of Nightmares
Chapter 1
Back home in London, well, the parallel universe London, Rose Tyler was locking up the shop she worked at part-time when she wasn’t helping Torchwood. Things had been…different after the latest battle with the Daleks. She’d been stranded again, by the man she loved, because he couldn’t leave his meta-crisis duplicate self running around the same dimension. But…in a way, her duplicate Doctor was better. He could actually admit that he loved her…well once at least. The original never could. But there were things her duplicate Doctor couldn’t do, like take her on amazing, unforgettable adventures. Although, the more she thought about it the more she realized that it had never been about the TARDIS, or visiting a new planet, or any of it. It had all been about being with the Doctor and holding his hand so he would never be alone…now she could do that.
Well, in theory she could at least. Ever since they returned to her flat, the extremely lavished one that Torchwood put her up in, things had been tense. They never mentioned the other world, never talked about what happened, or what would happen next. It was forced casual small talk, supper, shower—separately—and then bed. At least she went to bed; honestly she had no idea what the Doctor did all night. He had to sleep more than his pure Time Lord self, but it still wasn’t much.
Rose had hoped that things would have gotten better, easier, over time, but it had been almost two months, and if anything they were getting worse.
Too tired physically and emotionally, Rose stopped at a small family diner before going home. Things had to start looking up soon. If they didn’t she feared she might lose her Doctor—again.

He was busy tinkering away in the room Rose had given him, and even though it was her flat, she never came in, and he thanked her for that. He was working on a gift of her, and he wanted it to be a surprise. He’d probably be done by now if his half-human half-Time Lord self didn’t need so much sleep. He heard the door to the flat open, signaling Rose’s return and the smell of chips followed. She’d brought supper home again. That was the fourth time this week.
He frowned to himself and abandoned his work for the moment. He made his way to the kitchen. Rose was putting supper out on the counter, her coat lay across the table and her bag thrown carelessly against the counter on the floor. He studied her for a moment, watching her carefully. She looked tired. He might be half human, but that was mostly only in physical aspects. He could see the circles under her eyes, see the way her shoulders sagged, like the weight of the world was resting upon them.
Why was he just catching this now? He should have seen this weeks ago. Had he really been that preoccupied with himself?
Rose looked up, noticing him in the door way. “Hey,” even her voice sounded tired.
“Hey” he said, pushing off the door frame and walking over to her. “How was work?”
She shrugged and fished around in a drawer for a fork. “Fine.” She grabbed her foot and walked past him to the living room.
The Doctor grabbed his food as well and followed her. Usually he would take his supper back to his room to eat while he continued working but he had a gut feeling that tonight Rose needed more from him. He hadn’t realized until now, but he had been neglecting her, and that killed him.
He joined her on the couch, leaving a cushion between them as they ate in silence. She didn’t even turn the television on. He wanted to say something, anything to break the silence, but every time he opened his mouth, nothing came out. So the silence carried until Rose announced she was going to bed.

Dead. Not breathing. Dead. Wake up. Please. Regenerate.
…don’t leave me.
Blood. His blood. All over my hands. Not right… Regenerate!
“Rose!”
Please don’t go. Don’t leave me again. You promised! …you promised.
“Rose!”
You said you loved me! You can’t leave me! Regenerate!
“Rose!”
Rose sprang up in bed, hot tears streaming down her face. Her throat hurt from screaming and she choked on a sob that was still lodged in her lungs. She was panting…out of breath from the nightmare. Was that really all it had been? They always seemed so real.
“Rose?”
The Doctor was standing at the edge of the bed, leaning over her. He sounded worried; she could see it in his eyes too. The way he looked at her, like at any moment she was going to fall apart.
“I’m okay,” she choked out, trying to dry her face and clear her throat.
“You were screaming in your sleep! That’s not the definition of okay.”
Rose was quickly becoming agitated. Why was tonight any different from the previous nights? She’d had the same nightmare over and over and over again ever since the first time she was abandoned at Bad Wolf Bay. Every night. Every single night she woke up screaming, crying, out of breath and covered in sweat. So what made to night any different? “I said I’m fine.”
“The hell you are!”
“You’ve never cared before!” Rose regretted those words the second they were out of her mouth. She knew it wasn’t his fault. He was busy…always so busy.
The Doctor looked completely shocked at her words and slowly straightened his tall body. “This has happened before?” his voice was a ghost of a whisper. Haunted and unbelieving.
Rose shook her head. “It’s nothing.”
“How many times, Rose?”
“I’m honestly oka—”
“How many times?”
Rose flinched at his tone, and bit her lip. She didn’t dare look at him. Couldn’t bear to see his eyes. “…Every night…for months now."

He stumbled back, nearly falling over his own feet until his back hit the wall. “Every night?” he asked, not wanting to believe what she’d told him. She just nodded her head.
What the hell was wrong with him? He’d been living here, with her, just across the hall for two months now, and tonight was the first time he’d heard her? He knew he’d been focused on his work, but had he really been so focused that he’d been unable to hear Rose scream?
“Doctor?”
He’d been on the edge, of what he didn’t know, but her voice pulled him back. In a few quick moments he pulled her off the bed and into his arms, holding her close. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
He didn’t know what else to say so he just kept repeating himself over and over again into her hair. It was his fault for he nightmares. How could it not me? Because he hadn’t been able to save her. It was because of him that she’d fallen through the void and ended up in Pete’s world. He shouldn’t have let her help him. Should have made her stay somewhere else, somewhere safe. And it was his fault that she was trapped here. If he were stronger he could open the void and take her home, to her original world.
The Doctor could feel her body shake against his as she cried into his chest. Her hands came up and gripped the lapels of his blazer, her nails digging into her soft flesh of her palms until her knuckles turned white. He wished he could take her pain away, he’d do anything, even give his life.
“Rose…” he gently lifted her chin and cupped her face wiping away her tears. “Please don’t cry. I can’t stand it.” He dropped a soft kiss against her temple.
She started to calm down and smiled sheepishly. “Sorry, I’m being stupid.”
“No.” he shook his head and sat down with her, pulling her against him. “You’re not. I haven’t exactly been here for you. All I do is play around behind closed doors.”
Rose shrugged. “I just didn’t want to bother you.”
The Doctor sighed. “I’m nearly done with my work, but I promise I’m going to make things better.” Rose nodded and sighed buying her head against his chest. He held her until she was asleep again and tucked her back into bed. When he was sure she was sleeping soundly and no more nightmares were going to plague her he slowly slipped from the room. He would have to remember to ask her what her nightmares were about.
- 1
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Reality of Nightmares