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In the Cold Light of Day	By : OpenPage Category: 1 through F > 21 Jump Street Views: 1081 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own 21JS or the characters. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. All characters and events in this story are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead is coincidental.

Chapter List
- 1-All Shook Up
- 2-Choking on the Truth
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The chapel was unusually quiet for a Saturday morning, which suited Tom just fine. A dull pain throbbed behind his right eye, the causal effect of too much alcohol and… well, he wasn’t going to think about that. That was something he was trying desperately to forget. If he didn’t think about that, then he wouldn’t have to ask himself the question, and the last thing he wanted to do was ask the question because he was honestly terrified of the answer. For twenty-four years, he had considered himself straight, but then Booker…
“No! No! No!” his mind screamed. He wasn’t going to think about that! He was straight! He was Tom Hanson, and he was straight! It was the alcohol, the alcohol made him do it, it had nothing to do with...
The young officer’s breath suddenly hitched in his throat, and he choked back a gasp. Dennis stood in the doorway, a devil-may-care grin curling his sensuous, bowed lips. With his leather jacket and tight-fitting jeans, he had the makings of a modern-day James Dean; young, good-looking, fearless, with a hint of arrogance dancing behind his dark, mischievous eyes. If the fat cats in Hollywood knew of his existence, Tom was certain they’d cream their pants. Booker was a once in a generation heartthrob, blessed with charm, an Adonis physique, and street smarts. Whether the dark-haired officer realized it or not, Tom knew he could have anything or anyone his heart desired, all he had to do was bat his ridiculously long, full lashes, and people fell under his spell.
The world was his fiddle, and he was the bow.
The fluttering beat of Tom's heart brought a moan to his throat, and he quickly lowered his gaze in embarrassment. He had no idea why a detailed description of Booker’s lashes had popped into his mind when he was trying hard not to think about that. But the image stubbornly remained, and suddenly, his jeans felt too tight, the unexpected swelling of his cock sending prickles of panic up and down his spine. He was getting hard thinking about Booker, and getting hard meant he was attracted to him, and if he was attracted to him that meant…
“Oh, God,” he groaned, and resting his arm on the back of the chair he was straddling, he cushioned his forehead on his bicep and wallowed in his misery. He could make excuses until the cows came home, but he could not deny the facts; he was horny because thoughts of Dennis made him horny. Since their early morning dalliance, it was like a switch had triggered in his brain, and he suddenly saw the dark-haired officer with new eyes… with gay eyes, and no matter how hard he tried, the light remained on, burning brightly in his mind, body, and spirit. Alcohol wasn’t to blame, no matter how much he wished it were. The reality was plain and simple; he must have had repressed homosexual feelings for Booker long before he allowed the dark-haired officer to touch him in such an intimate way. After all, only a man with homosexual leanings would allow another man to jerk them off just because they offered. The thought was a sobering one, and he broke out in a cold sweat. He was not the man he thought he was, he was an imposter, and he was so good at hiding the truth, he had even fooled himself. He wasn't straight, he was… Gay? Bi? Queer? A fag? A butt pirate? A pillow biter? A cock jockey? An ass bandit? The synonyms swirled around in his mind, each term more degrading than the last. He'd witnessed enough homophobia to know these were the taunts he would face once the truth became known, and the reality only added to his depression.
His life would never be the same again.
“Oh, God!” he exclaimed again, just in case The Almighty hadn’t heard the desperation in his voice the first time. He felt sick to his stomach, and he wished he could forget the past twelve hours and wake up in his bed alone because then he would be none the wiser about his true sexual orientation. He would just be Tom, straight, boring Tom, and life would carry on as normal.
No such luck.
“Hey, man, what’s up?”
Doug’s greeting caught Tom off guard, and his head jerked up in surprise. “Huh? What?” he spluttered, the throbbing in his groin giving his friend’s words a whole new meaning.
Well aware of Tom’s intolerance to alcohol, Doug pulled up a chair and sat down. “You really tied one on last night, I’m betting you could use a hair of the dog.”
The very thought of alcohol made Tom’s stomach lurch, and his face paled. “Fuck no,” he muttered. “I’m never drinking again.”
An amused grin tilted Doug’s lips. “That’s what you said last time. So, I guess Booker managed to get your drunken ass home okay?”
It was an innocent enough question, but it had the power to light up Tom’s face like a beacon. “Um, yeah,” he mumbled awkwardly, his brief response not giving too much away.
Although not one of the most perceptive people on the planet, Doug knew his friend well enough to recognize certain signs. Tom was hiding something, and that something was making him extremely uncomfortable, which only made the secret more tantalizing. If Hanson had embarrassed himself while drunk, he wanted to know what he’d done so he could tease him mercilessly about it. It was what best friends did, and he wasn’t about to miss out on a golden opportunity to poke fun just because the young officer was hungover and feeling vulnerable. After all, shit-stirring was all part of the friendship code, hangover or no hangover.
So, without further delay, he began a gentle interrogation. “Is something wrong? ‘Cause if you wanna talk, I’m here for you, Tommy.”
A look of panic flitted across Tom’s face, but he quickly managed to neutralize his expression. “Nothing’s wrong,” he muttered. “I’m just tired.”
Doug immediately recognized the excuse for what it was, a lie, and determined to get to the bottom of Tom’s humiliation, he continued to press. “Aw, c’mon, Hanson,” he wheedled, his eyes flashing with undisguised merriment. “Spill. What did you do? You didn’t barf in Booker’s car, did you? ‘Cause if you did, I wanna—”
“I SAID, NOTHING’S WRONG!” Tom yelled, the fierceness in his voice catching Doug by surprise. “SO DROP IT, OKAY? JUST DROP IT!”
With his hands raised in a gesture of surrender, Doug slowly rose to his feet. “Whoa, Tommy, I was only teasing. No need to get your panties in a bunch.”
From across the room, Booker watched the heated exchange, a look of sadness extinguishing the twinkle in his eyes. He could still remember the panic and confusion he had felt after acting on his impulses and accepting a male classmate’s invitation of a blowjob behind the school gym. There had been no romance in the act, it was trousers down, cock out, a hot mouth sucking him off, followed by an orgasm unlike any other he had experienced with a girl. The whole encounter had been deeply emotional, yet mortifyingly humiliating because it had verified what he already knew; he was attracted to boys as well as girls, and as a fourteen-year-old, he had found the truth a hard pill to swallow. His personality changed after that; he became guarded and withdrawn, which raised the suspicions of the guidance counselor, who called him into his office and asked if he was taking drugs. The situation would have been laughable if he hadn’t been so screwed up. Then, his whole world imploded when a jealous ex-girlfriend outed him, making him a target for bullies. A piece of him died that day, but out of the ashes rose a new Dennis Booker, a tougher, more confident Dennis Booker who fought back against his antagonists and courageously defended the disenfranchised. High school was still a nightmare, but he slowly grew comfortable with his sexuality, and by the time he started college, he no longer gave a rat’s ass about what people thought of him. C'est la vie…
Que sera, sera… Yada, yada, yada.
But Tom was just beginning his journey of discovery, and having trodden the same rocky path, he knew the young officer’s quest toward self-acceptance would be fraught with hurdles. However, while he had trekked the bumpy road in search of enlightenment on his own, he was determined Tom would not suffer the same fate. He would be by his side, every step of the way, if not as a lover, then as a friend because no one should have to deal with such a monumental, life-changing experience alone.
No one.
Therefore, when Tom stormed past him and down the stairs, his immediate instinct was to follow him. But his impetuous nature often landed him in hot water, so he decided to cool his heels and give his friend some space. Then, he would seek him out, and with gentle, guiding hands, he would introduce him to a new and exciting world filled with endless possibilities.
He would open Tom's eyes to the wonders of gay love.
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In the Cold Light of Day