Angel

ANGEL

ANGEL

By
Morticia
55 - 56/60

 
Warning
Main Character Death

TUVOK
I have spent the
last day in meditation, examining my actions over the last few years and the
last few weeks in particular.
I have lost my
way. I understand this much. Where once was a certainty and clarity of purpose,
there is only confusion and chaos.
I cannot exactly
establish the point at which my reasoning became tainted but I must at least
acknowledge that it is true.
Humans often are
distracted by emotions. They make decisions based on illogical premises. This
is both a weakness and, I have found, an odd strength. For myself, I cannot
exist without logic. My actions have been logical. They have also been wrong.

I understand that
much, at least.
My wife, Kathryn,
is insane. Perhaps not in human terms, but in Vulcan terms there is no other
explanation for her current behavior. Emotion has clouded her judgment so that
she now truly seems to believe the words that she says. Words that are untrue
and yet so near the truth that she does not actually lie.
When I examine
my own actions, I am both content that I have acted logically and at the same
time sure that I have acted incorrectly. This is a moral dilemma that I cannot
resolve.
After Tom’s suicide
attempt, when he calmly advised us that Chakotay had always intended to leave
him should he return to the Alpha Quadrant, it was logical for me to intervene.
I saw a vulnerable crewmember that had been emotionally abused by a senior officer.
In view of Tom Paris’s depression, it was logical to remove him from the source
of his emotional distress.
It was logical.
It was also arrogant. How could I, a Vulcan, have believed that I could make
the correct decision of how to treat a human’s emotional problems? I also failed
to see that Kathryn’s condemnation of Chakotay was not supporting of my decision,
but in fact an emotional reaction.
In equal measure
that Kathryn had once loved Chakotay, so she turned on him with hate. I did
not see it. Perhaps I chose not to see it.
As my Captain,
Kathryn commanded my loyalty. As my wife, I expected her support and therefore
failed to understand that her ratification of my judgment was based on malice.
It was not until Commander Chakotay and Lieutenant Paris made their escape from
Deep Space 9 that I understood that I was wrong in my belief that Tom’s love
for the Commander was one-sided. The realisation came to me too late. I had
already condemned Tom to fugitive status with my arrogant and clearly incorrect
medical recommendations.
I was arrogant.
I was incorrect. I was not however culpable. Not at that point. My failure to
reveal Kathryn’s lies, however, is inexcusable. Yet it IS logical. She is my
Captain. She is my wife. She is mad.
To reveal her dishonesty
will solve nothing. Chakotay and Tom will still be fugitives, but their chances
of survival will become slimmer. The upper echelons of Starfleet will not allow
it to become public knowledge that the "heroic" Captain Kathryn Janeway
has acted so improperly. She would simply be retired, hidden away in some place
where she can do no further harm.
Chakotay and Tom
on the other hand, would never be given the opportunity to clear their names.
They would disappear. It would be the only logical way to deal with such a potential
source of embarrassment.
Silence is also
a lie. My logic tells me that silence is the only course of action open to me.
Silence will protect all of us. It is logical. It is wrong. I cannot reconcile
the two.
I have received
a message from T’Pel. She is arriving on DS9 later today. She wishes me to leave
Kathryn and return to my family. I find myself thinking of her constantly now.
I see her face, the faces of my children, and I know that I will be unable to
refuse her request.
I cannot leave
Kathryn.
I cannot refuse
T’Pel.
I cannot tell the
truth.
I cannot continue
to lie through my silence.
I have spent the
last day in meditation, seeking an honorable course of action.
There is onle
e
logical choice for me now.
~~~

JACQUELINE
 

When Deanna and
I arrived at Kathryn Janeway’s door and requested admittance, she was charm
personified. Welcoming us profusely, thanking us for our courtesy in visiting.
She actually threw her arms around me and begged my forgiveness for allowing
Chakotay to steal my "Poor Brave Tom."
Had I not clearly
remembered her equally award-winning performance when I had requested her help
to get Tom out of Auckland I might have been convinced. As it was, when she
turned away to fetch us coffee, I caught Deanna’s eyes questioningly.

"She is agitated
and very angry." Deanna whispered "Her emotions have no correlation
to her behavior."
I nodded and then
turned a bright, vacant smile on the returning Captain.
"Owen has
told me what a wonderful job you did, getting Voyager safely home." I simpered
"He says that you gave Tom a second chance and that Tom proved to be an
excellent pilot."
Kathryn smiled
fatuously
"You should
be very proud of Tom. He has been an excellent officer altogether. Unfortunately,
after he was so badly injured we had no choice except to accept the V’rakn’hal
cure and we had no idea that it would affect him so badly."

"Mentally,
you mean?" Deanna asked, sipping her coffee and smiling sweetly at the
Captain.
"Yes. I blame
myself of course." Kathryn said, "I should never have let Chakotay
take advantage of his illness. I KNEW that Chakotay was a dangerous man, however
he is a consummate actor. I truly hoped that he was serious about Tom."

"Of course.
You would hardly have agreed to marry them otherwise." I said. My voice
must have been a little sharp because Kathryn narrowed her eyes slightly before
continuing.
"Indeed. I
had doubts, of course, but never anything substantial that I could act upon.
I did, as my logs show, put their wedding off for as long as I could. Fortunately,
the Heran arrived in time to reveal Chakotay’s obvious duplicity before it was
too late. Poor Tom was so distraught by Chakotay’s immediate desertion of him
that he attempted to end his own life."
"Harry Kim
maintains that Chakotay never intended to go back to Angel." Deanna said
softly
Kathryn’s eyes
flashed.
"Harry Kim
is simply trying to cover up his own Maquis athiathies. His comment is ludicrous.
If Chakotay hadn’t left Tom, why on earth would Tom have felt the need to slit
his wrists?" she argued, her bluntness making me flinch.
"Perhaps his
action was just the effects of the V’rakn drugs. You have said that he was not
in his right mind. Perhaps he simply misread the situation and overreacted"
I challenged.
Kathryn stiffened
dangerously.
"I’m sorry
to say this to you, Jacqueline, especially in front of a witness and I have
omitted it from my official log, for Tom’s sake, BUT, Tom’s original shuttle
accident, the one in which he was paralyzed, was ALSO a suicide attempt."

My gasp of horror
was genuine.
"Tom and Chakotay
first embarked on their relationship a few weeks before the accident. Tom moved
in with Chakotay, against my advice, I assure you. A week later, Chakotay had
one of his usual fits of insane temper and threw him out of his quarters. Tom
took the shuttle, without permission, and attempted to kill himself. After it
was clear that Tom would survive, I amended the logs so that Tom would not be
charged."
"I don’t believe
it."
"I would hate
it to become public knowledge that Tom deserted his post and stole and destroyed
one of our few remaining shuttles simply because he had been spurned by a lover."
Kathryn said, her threat quite evident beneath her smile
"If that was
true, why did you let Chakotay take over Tom’s care after his paralysis?"

"I had no
choice. Tom wanted to die. He wouldn’t eat. He was starving himself to death.
When Chakotay agreed to look after him, he changed, regained the will to live.
I knew he was fooling himself about Chakotay’s feelings for him. That’s why
I resisted the wedding plans until Tould uld walk again. I hoped that when Tom
was no longer so reliant on Chakotay he would come to his senses."

"Tom was paralyzed
for over a year, wasn’t he?" I asked
"That’s right."

"And during
this time Chakotay looked after him?"
Kathryn flushed
with annoyance.
"He merely
used to spend an hour or two in sickbay with him after shift."

"Harry Kim
said Tom LIVED with Chakotay." Deanna argued
"Only for
a couple of weeks."
"Harry said
it was several months."
"Harry Kim
is a LIAR"
"Several of
the crew have also said it was at least two months." Deanna challenged

"Weeks, months,
what the hell difference does it make?" Kathryn snapped angrily

"Given the
huge physical and emotional strain of looking after a person so severely disabled,
I believe it makes a huge difference." Deanna said firmly "A ruthless
terrorist like you have described Chakotay to be, would hardly be capable of
the patience and kindness required to take on such a task. "

"Chakotay
is a very clever man. He was simply pretending to care about Tom."

"Pretending
for 24 hours a day, seven days a week, for several months?"

"YES!"

The two of them
glared at each other furiously and then fell silent.
Although I had
not consciously considered Tom’s life as a quadriplegic, probably because the
thought of him suffering so much was unbearable, Deanna’s words made perfect
sense to me.
It must have been
a terrible task to look after Tom when he was so severely injured. This man,
Chakotay, whatever faults he might have, whatever mistakes he may have made,
truly MUST love my son to have done what he did.
"Just tell
me one thing, Kathryn. Is it Tom you hate or Chakotay?" I asked, unable
to keep my temper any longer.
"I think it
is time for you to leave, Jacqueline. The strain has obviously become too much
for you. And as for YOU," she said, turning viciously to Deanna "I
will be filing a formal complaint of insubordination against you, counselor."

"Insubordination?
Why, Captain Janeway, I was merely trying to help Jacqueline understand how
her only son became so ill. Surely you don’t object to filling in a few details
that are missing from your logs?" Deanna said calmly although I knew that
Kathryn’s threat must have unnerved her.
Kathryn just glared
at her furiously.
"It doesn’t
matter, Deanna, I’m suret Tot Tom will explain everything to me when he comes
home." I said smoothly, rising to leave. Other than physically attacking
Kathryn and beating her senseless, there was obviously no way in which we would
get her to admit that she was lying.
And she WAS lying,
obviously, but I still had absolutely no idea of why.
 

~~~

 

JEAN-LUC
I had made a career
of being in the right place at the right time. My reputation had been built
simply because I had so often found myself in a situation just at the right
moment, so that my interference made the crucial difference. Good Luck and Timing
were the constant factors in my life.
So why had I always
been too late for the most important thing in my life?
I had always been
in the wrong place at the wrong time for my son. I had regretted leaving Jacqueline
only after she had married Owen. I had only asked to interfere in Tom’s life
after Caldik Prime when the damage to him had already been done. I had only
decided to claim him the day after he was lost in the badlands.

I had only arrived
at Tuvok’s quarters after the Vulcan had taken his own life.
~~~

CHAKOTAY

 

When we arrived
at the meeting lodge, Neelix and The Doctor were courteously asked if they would
permit themselves to be escorted to guest quarters. They waited for me to agree
and then left me alone with my brothers.
"The decision
of the council will affect them also. They should be allowed to speak in their
own defense." I said furiously.
"Things have
changed, Chakotay" Nayib told me softly "Since we left the Federation,
we have abandoned their ways. Only our ancient laws are held sacred now. Only
tribal members may automatically attend a closed hearing. Later, when the elders
have spoken with you, they may choose to listen to the witness of your companions.
This will be their decision, however, not yours."
Seeing my distress,
Beyvahl squeezed my shoulder comfortingly
"Have faith,
Chakotay. The spirits have brought you to this here and now for a reason. The
Elders will not abandon you as long as they believe that you have followed your
heart and been true to our ways."
I nodded quietly
and squaring my shoulders, I strode into the lodge.
The entire government
of Dorvan was in place. Dozens of faces glared at me as I walked into the centre
of the huge round room. I was completely surrounded by my peers and elders.
I had never seen so many of the tribe gathered before for anything less than
a murder trial.
Wabashaw stood
mly mly before me and spoke:
"Chakotay,
son of Kolopak, you are here to answer a capital charge. Are you prepared to
accept the judgement of your tribe?"
"I am here
to plead sanctuary. I was unaware that I am being charged with a capital offence."
I replied in bewilderment
"You have
been accused of lying, son of Kolopak."
Lying? I nearly
laughed out loud and then dread seized my heart. Nayib had told me that Dorvan
had reverted to the old ways. He simply hadn’t warned me how far. Back on Earth,
centuries ago, even before the white men had stolen our land, the most grievous
offence one of our people could commit was to lie. Even murder might be forgiven,
if sufficient cause could be argued, but to lie was unforgivable.

My people believed
that the deliberate liar was capable of committing any crime and then hiding
behind the screen of cowardly untruths and double-dealing. A liar by default
was therefore likely to commit any and all other crimes and was summarily executed.

"Who calls
me a liar?" I demanded furiously "Let my accuser stand forward."

The crowd shifted
a little and he stepped forwards until he was barely a foot from me, a malevolent
look of triumph on his face. I looked at him in disbelief. How could such beauty
hide such an evil heart?
"You fool"
I hissed "Don’t you realise that you have lost? If I am found guilty of
lying, they will not simply banish Tom, they will EXECUTE me."

Angel smirked.

"You will
be found guilty because you are. You promised to stay with me forever. You lied.
I would rather see you dead than in that bastard’s arms for one more minute.
But don’t worry. I have a ship in orbit. Just say the word and I’ll transport
you out of here. We can go to Hera. You’ll be safe there. With me, of course,
where you belong."
I looked at him
with disbelief and a surprising amount of pity.
"You’re mad
if you think I would go with you. I am truly sorry, Angel. I never wanted this
to happen. I never wanted to fall in love with Tom. But I did. It’s too late
for us, now. Please just let me go. If you love me, truly love me, you will
let me go." I pleaded
His face stiffened
into a mask of bitter hurt.
"Come with
me or die. That’s your choice. Either way, you’ll never see Tom again."
he snarled and turned away from me to take a seat in the crowd.

Beyvahl was too
far from me to hear the exchange; he had stormed up to Wabashaw

"You said
that this was to be a judgment of whether Chakotay could claim sanctuary, not
a trial." He yelled furiously
"I will not
let you do this."
"The situation
has changed since we spoke. A Federation Starship is in orbit, demanding the
return of your brother and his companions. A Heran Ship is demanding that Chakotay
be turned over to their protection. Long-range sensors indicate a flotilla of
ships is rapidly joining them. So far we are refusing all attempts to negotiate.
Before long, our world might be plunged into war in defense of your brother’s
actions.
"Chakotay
asks that his people risk their lives to protect him. We in turn ask him to
prove that he is worthy of our sacrifice. He stands accused of being a liar.
He brings a man with him who is accused of being a thief. Would you have Dorvan
cast back into war on behalf of a man who will not even defend his own honour?"
Wabashaw answered with surprising mildness
"He is right,
Bey" I answered clearly, and was gratified to hear a low mumble of approval
from the crowd.
"I have brought
danger to us all. The wolf is at the door, and it is I who have invited him
in. I am responsible for this situation. I am asking you all for help. If I
must stand trial to earn that right, then so be it."
Wabashaw looked
at me kindly.
"Son of Kolopak.
Convince us that you are a man of honor still, and we will gladly offer our
lives in your defense. But be warned, if you fail to convince us, you will be
sacrificed for the good of the tribe and your companions will be returned to
their people."
"I understand
and agree." I said with more confidence than I felt.
Wabashaw stepped
forward to speak to me in private
"Where is
your husband? You must bring him here to bear witness for you." He whispered

"Tom is ill.
He is not strong. I will not allow his presence here. Should you judge against
me, I ask you to return him to his people before he learns of my fate."
I begged
"Without his
witness it will be difficult for you to make a case against your accuser."
He warned me quietly "Angel has already described him as a sly deceiver,
who has cunningly stolen you. His failure to attend this trial will be seen
as evidence of his guilt and by default your own."
"I know"
I told him sadly "but I can’t let him face this. He’s been through too
much already. This is at least one thing I can spare him."

~~~

T’PEL
My husband looks
peaceful in death.
He did not take
his life in emotion, but in logic. This is clear from his ritual preparations
and his meditative pose.
There is no dishonor
here.
There is only mystery.

What would make
my husband conclude that his only honorable choice was death?
He has left an
apology but no explanation.
It is intolerable.

I must know.

~~~

JACQUELINE
 

I walked to the
door, stiff with anger and pride. I was determined not to give Kathryn the satisfaction
of showing my distress.
I had achieved
nothing here except to be more positive than ever that Tom and Chakotay loved
each other. I was no nearer any way of helping them. Kathryn was never going
to admit the truth, whatever it was, and there was no way I could make her.

And the bitch knew
it, of course, which was why she had the unmitigated gall to say:

"Do come again,
Jacqueline, when you are feeling better."
If I had been carrying
a phaser, I swear she would have died then and there. I spun in fury, pleased
to see a spark of genuine fear in her eyes as she caught the madness in mine.

Towering over her
diminutive frame, I clenched my fists tightly to stop myself from knocking her
to the floor.
"Listen to
me, you poisonous little dwarf, I WILL discover the truth and when I do, you
had better be ready to haul your sorry ass back to the bloody Delta Quadrant,
because I will make you sorry that you were ever born."
For a moment she
actually looked frightened and then a cool smile spread over her haughty face.

"I see that
Tom takes after YOUR side of the family." She smirked.
I don’t remember
hitting her. I heard the cartilage in her nose splinter and watched the fountain
of blood emerge with surprise. It was only the pain in my knuckles that informed
me that it was I who had struck the blow.
Then I started
to laugh hysterically.
"Oo ad oman"
She screamed unintelligibly, her hands pressed to her face in an effort to stop
the bleeding.
Deanna grabbed
my arm in panic and dragged me towards the door.
It opened, even
before we got there to reveal Jean-Luc. His slim regal form swayed in surprise
as he digested the scene. My hysterics, Deana’s panic and Kathryn’s broken face.

Then with typical
aplomb he turned calmly to Deanna
"Counselor,
please escort Mrs. Paris back to her quarters. I will take care of Captain Janeway."

"I will take
care of Captain Janeway" replied an unfamiliar voice.
We all turned in
shock to see a tall, imperious Vulcan woman in the doorway. Before any of us
could question her, she stepped forwards purposefully, walked straight up to
Kathryn and put her hands on the Captain’s forehead in a firm grip.

"My mind to
your mind…" she said.
 

Part 56
 

TOM
I woke from a fever
dream of flying. Not Voyager type flying, but the genuine article. A crazy mixed
up jumble of images, huge golden wings and the rush of air in my face and the
freedom of tumbling through the wild slipstreams between vast mountains. I remember
flexing my arms, which weren’t arms, and launching through space, circling and
searching for something important, but I had no idea of what it was that had
been so vital, only the all pervading feeling of intense loss and disappointment
over my fruitless search.
And in the way
of dreams, the more I tried to remember the details, the hazier the memory became
until nothing remained except a crushing sense of loss that I was trapped wi

my own fragile body, alone and afraid.
Gradually I became
aware of low voices from the room beyond. Carefully I threw back the handmade
blanket, mesmerized momentarily by the intricate patterns woven through the
cloth. Something about the shapes stirred a fleeting memory and then it was
gone so quickly that I could only blink in confusion.
Drawn again by
the voices, I crept stealthily towards the doorway and pressed my head against
the thin wooden door.
"He is sleeping.
He’s exhausted, malnourished and recovering from some major physical trauma.
Furthermore, I believe his tiredness also stems from a depressive illness. I
sense a strong spirit in him, Nayib, a deceptive strength but I understand Chakotay’s
decision. He has charged us to protect his Thomas while he fights his own battles."

I recognised the
voice of Chakotay’s mother and stiffened as I heard her mentioning Chakotay’s
name in connection with fighting battles. Had Chakotay deceived me? Had he yet
again turned away from me to make decisions on my behalf? It seemed that he
had, because a strong male voice answered her:
"He doesn’t
stand a chance without Tom being there. Angel has already convinced most of
the council that Chakotay has been purposefully charmed and seduced by a man
of spite and wickedness, the son of the treacherous Admiral Paris himself. No
one wants to find Chakotay guilty of lying to Angel, they will instead choose
to believe that he has been unwillingly trapped in a web spun by an artful deceiver."

"Shush, keep
your voice down. You will wake him up." A younger female voice scolded,
presumably one of Chakotay’s sisters.
"Good. He
should be there with his husband, not cowering here with the womenfolk."

"He is NOT
cowering, he is sleeping. And do I have to remind you that the ‘womenfolk’ you
are referring to so disparagingly are your mother and sisters who risked their
lives defending this homestead when you were so busy playing soldiers with your
brothers that you left us here undefended when the Cardassians invaded?"
Chakotay’s mother snapped angrily
"Forgive me,
mother, I did not mean to insult you, any of you. I simply can’t bear to think
that Chakotay is facing this ordeal alone. Surely he has suffered enough in
his years of exile without coming home to this mockery of a trial?"

"Nayib, my
son, I do not see how Tom’s presence can help. In fact it may well harm Chakotay
further. I believe that Tom is so frail that no one will believe that HE was
an equal instigator of the relationship let alone a thief of Chakotay’s heart.
His vulnerability will only add fuel to Angel’s original accusation that Chakotay
broke his word of honour by willingly deserting him for another.

"Chakotay
claims that the spirits brought him together with Tom, that it was their will
that they were joined. I believe him. I can sense the presence of greater forces
in Tom, but I doubt that the council will. They will see only the broken shell
of a man who can barely walk, let alone steal Chakotay by force. They will not
believe that the Spirits would choose to match Chakotay with such a mate."

"I can’t believe
it myself, Mother." Nayib’s voice spat viciously, making me tremble with
a strange combination of rage and uncertainty. "How the hell could he leave
Angel for such a pathetic creature. He looks half-dead! I’ve seen Cardassians
with more sex appeal."
I heard the unmistakable
crack of a hand meeting a cheek in anger and it ALMOST made me feel better that
Chakotay’s mother disagreed with Nayib’s cruel dismissal of me.

"How dare
you say such a thing in my house, Nayib? Cardassians with sex appeal. The very
notion is disgusting."
Oh well, maybe
she did agree after all. It wasn’t a surprise, but it still hurt like hell.

"I think he’s
really cute, in a pale poetic kind of way." A young female voice piped
up suddenly.
"He’s your
brother’s husband, Layla, so get that covetous gleam out of your eye."
Nayib snapped
"Well, I was
only saying. Anyway, if the council decide that Chakotay’s promise to Angel
stands, then Tom will be free and he’ll need someone to take care of him."

"He’s a man,
not a bloody bird with broken wings. You can’t keep him as a pet, you stupid
g- mother? MOTHER?"
"Mom, what’s
wrong?" The older girl’s voice gasped in obvious panic.
It was too much
for me; I pushed open the door and stumbled into the room. Chakotay’s mother
was as white as a ghost, her weathered bronze skin bleached with shock, her
dark expressive eyes blank and gazing inwardly. The two girls were helping her
into a seat. I limped forwards only to be stopped by Nayib’s firm restraining
hand.
"Don’t touch
her" he warned, his voice surprisingly gentle "She is having a vision."

"Vision?"
I queried
"She has the
sight, although it rarely touches her these days. Since our father’s death she
has rarely been affected. I don’t know what has brought this on."

"She had one
earlier, I think, when we were talking together." I offered hesitantly

Nayib looked at
me in surprise, visibly re-evaluating me.
"She said
she sensed the hand of the Spirits in you. Perhaps she’s right. Chakotay is
not the type to casually break his word."
I flinched. "I
don’t know what the spirits intended, but I can assure you that Chakotay didn’t
do anything casually. It was my fault, everything was my fault. I knew about
Angel from the beginning and I promised that I would let Chakotay leave me if
and when we got home. I lied."
"YOU lied?"

"I couldn’t
do it. I couldn’t let him go. I WON’T let him go." I clarified, "Chakotay
is MINE."
Nayib did a double
take at my furious words.
"You certainly
aren’t quite what you appear to be, Tom Paris." He finally said, his eyes
searching my face questioningly.
"He is the
Thunderbird." Chakotay’s mother said softly, her voice filled with wonder.

I snapped my head
towards her in panic. She was still sitting but the colour had returned to her
cheeks and her dark eyes were staring directly at me with deep intensity. I
limped towards her, drawn by her hypnotic stare. Nayib simply stepped out of
my way, obviously bewildered by his mother’s words. I sank slowly to kneel at
her feet so that our eyes were level.
"Help me"
I begged her, "Tell me what it means, tell me what I have to do."

She reached out
a brown wrinkled hand and gently caressed my cheek; the hard calluses of her
fingers scraping over my fine stubble, the sensation making me tremble with
loneliness for Chakotay’s touch.
"Listen to
me, little one, let me tell you the ways of our people, together we will wake
the magic in your heart."
Then she turned
to the oldest of her daughters.
"Go fetch
the Henna, Neera, we must prepare Tom for his battle."
"You can’t
do this, not without Beyvahl" Nayib protested angrily
"Can’t do
WHAT without me?" Bey asked as he walked unexpectedly through the door.

"What are
YOU doing here?" Nayib gasped
"Obviously
the same as you, Chakotay is losing, the council are preparing to declare his
marriage to Tom void. The only chance now is if Tom can convince them he is
Chakotay’s true lifemate, although Spirits alone know how the hell he will do
THAT." He declared, looking at my kneeling form with unconscious contempt.

Chakotay’s mother
laughed, her voice surprisingly girlish in its amusement. We all turned towards
her in confusion. She turned a gentle smile on me.
"I know you
are brave, little warrior. Can you face more pain? Terrible pain? You must trust
me, now. I cannot promise you victory but I can give you weapons to fight with.
Will you trust me, Thomas?"
"Always."
I promised sincerely "I’m not afraid of pain, only of losing Chakotay."

She smiled at me
with obvious approval and then turned to Nayib:
"Go to the
council, tell them that Tom will perform the ritual of Wkangana."

Nayib paled, looked
at me in disbelief and then spluttered indignantly "That’s crazy. He’ll
never survive and besides he isn’t a member of the tribe, the council won’t
allow an outsider to participate in such a sacred rite."
"He soon will
be" Neera said firmly, brandishing a bowl of brown dye in his direction.

Nayib looked helplessly
at Beyvahl.
"Go,"
Bey said, "As head of this house, I agree with mother. Tom will be prepared
for the Wkangana."
"Chakotay
will go crazy."
"If he loses
Tom, he will go truly crazy, Nayib. GO."
 

HARRY
The world has gone
mad. I am actually beginning to think that we haven’t returned home at all.
We have landed in some fucked up alternate universe or maybe aliens who are
playing some kind of game with our heads have captured us.
I have been dismissed
from Starfleet. No Court-Martial. No chance to defend myself. No ten years in
the brig for striking a superior officer, either, so I guess it’s not all crap.

I am a civilian.

Me.

Harry Kim, ex-ensign,
current no body.
I wonder what the
hell has happened to Tom.
I wonder how many
years in prison you get for stealing an Admiral’s ship.
Forever, probably.
At least I’ll get tried as a civilian though. Surely that’s not as bad. I think
they have vidcasts in civilian prisons and they give you retraining to become
a useful member of society. Not much call for Conn Officers in the civilian
world.
Maybe I can even
take my clarinet. That would be nice.
I might even get
a chance to watch all of the Klingon soap opera that B’Elanna got me hooked
on.
I wish B’El were
here. She’d really have kicked some ass.
Then again, all
of the Maquis are pretty good ass-kickers. I can’t believe how quickly we managed
to take the ship.
There’s no brig
on an Admiral’s yacht, so we have just thrown the crew into the Admiral’s personal
quarters and fused the door shut. Fortunately, most of the crew was on DS9 when
we boarded and the few left on board gave in without much of a struggle. I don’t
want to hurt anyone. I just want to get to Dorvan in case Tom and Chakotay need
to run again.
So okay, the HPTS
isn’t going to be a hell of a lot of use in a firefight, but we can at least
get in the way or something.
Desperate times
call for desperate plans, and I’ve got nothing to lose now.
Well that’s not
strictly true.
Sue’s eyes are
shining at me brightly from the helm. She has thrown away her career for me.
She says that there is no future in Starfleet for her, if I am not there too.

We will be fugitives
together.
It is scary, her
doing this for me, but wonderful too.
I honestly hoped
that Captain Picard would help Tom, but the only result of his visit to my cell
was my ignominious medical discharge.
Apparently I am
MAD.
I’m certainly pissed
off.
"Lets get
the hell out of here." I say to my ragged crew.
Which is when the
air of the bridge shimmers with a multitude of transporter signals and before
we can even draw our weapons we are surrounded.
My look of helpless
defiance is met by a surprisingly friendly grin.
"I believe
you are going our way, Ensign Kim. So nice of you to warm the engines up."

In complete bewilderment,
I offer the command chair to Captain Picard and look wonderingly at his companions.

Deanna Troi, I
recognise, of course. Tom’s mother I would know anywhere, even if I hadn’t seen
her photo in Tom’s quarters, she has the same fine boned elegance, the same
deceptive strength. The two pretty blondes are obviously his sisters. I have
no idea who the Vulcan woman is though.
"I thought
you left in the Enterprise, Sir" I finally manage
"I was unavoidably
detained on DS9" Picard replied coolly. "Once we are underway, I will
tell you all about it."
"Yes, Sir."

"Set course
for Dorvan, maximum warp."
"Yes, Sir"
Sue answered happily, looking over her shoulders to give me an ecstatic grin.

And suddenly I
knew, whatever happened, that I WAS on the side of the good guys, after all.

 
Go
to Part 57