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The Earth is Still Part of the Sky	By : Io Category: Supernatural > Slash - Male/Male > Dean/Sam Views: 2470 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Supernatural, characters, locations, etc, do not belong to me in any way, shape or form. I make no profit from this work.

Chapter List
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Every day, it was getting more difficult to even breathe the same air as Sam. Dean kept feeling it, over and over, Sam's naked chest pressed to his, his mouth – dear God, his mouth.
Fucking hell. This couldn't go on. The past few weeks, Dean had been watching Sam like a hawk, checking his face for any signs of recollection, but Sam gave no indication that he remembered what it was to have his mouth glued to his big brother's, or jerk him off in a dingy, rusty warehouse.
Nope, Sam was just Sam, same as always. It was Dean who had changed.
Unfortunately, Sam had noticed.
“Why are you constantly tiptoeing around me?” he asked one day a few weeks after Steve Wandell's funeral.
They had just checked into a motel room after an eleven-hour drive, and Dean was exhausted. He didn't have the strength for this. He gingerly eased himself down on the corner of one of the beds. Said beds were both too close together and too far apart for Dean's taste.
“What are you talking about?” Dean asked, scrubbing a hand across his grainy eyelids.
“You won't let me drive, you won't let me go anywhere by myself, you agree with everything I say, which, let's face it, is a huge red flag to those who know you, and I see you watching me constantly, like my eyes are gonna turn black any moment. I thought we were over what happened in Duluth. What the hell, Dean?”
Dean sighed. He really, really didn't want to get into this now, but Sam wasn't giving him much choice.
“Look, Sammy, I'm just trying to make sure you stay safe, okay? If your highness will recall, you disappeared on me for a week, and we spent a very, very difficult day cleaning all that up.”
Sam bristled at that.
“Hey, we're protected from that now,” he said stiffly. “Neither of us is gonna get possessed, and I wish you'd stop bringing it up. And anyway, even right after it went down, you weren't as bad as you are now.”
“No, Sam,” Dean said sagely. “I was. I guess I was just better at hiding it.”
“Great. So you don't trust me at all anymore.”
“It's not that, Sammy,” Dean objected.
“No, Dean, I think it is. I think you think I'm just gonna go out and start randomly murdering people. God, I'm amazed you can sleep in the same room with me.”
I can't, Dean almost said, but controlled his tongue just in time. Instead, he said, “Come on, Sammy, don't you think you're reading into things a bit?”
“No, I don't,” Sam said flatly. “I've seen you following me when you think you're being slick. I can barely run an errand by myself. Jesus, heaven forbid I should meet a girl and want to go out for a night! I'm amazed you haven't followed me on a date!”
“Actually-” Dean began, and quickly cut himself off.
Sam's eyes narrowed.
“What, Dean?” he probed.
“Nothing,” Dean said. “I was just thinking that you could go and pick up some beer.”
“That's not what you were gonna say,” Sam accused.
“Pretty sure it was,” Dean said mildly, hiding the panic that was lodged in his throat.
“What were you really gonna say?” Sam demanded.
“Nothing,” Dean insisted. “Just really want some beer.”
“Bullshit. You were going to tell me you followed me on a date, weren't you?”
“Sam-”
“When was it?” Sam interrupted shortly.
“I don't-”
“When?”
Dean sighed and dropped his gaze to the floor.
"You remember the she-wolf in San Francisco?"
Sam's eyes darkened as he nodded. She'd been a beautiful, intelligent woman, full of life and vitality, and she'd had no clue of the gruesome murders she'd been committing at each full-moon cycle. He'd fallen for her in a way he never thought possible after Jessica. But he'd lost her too, in the end; it had been his own bullet that had snuffed out her life, at her request.
"Yeah, I remember," Sam replied quietly.
"I watched you."
Sam's head snapped up and his eyes fixed on Dean's face. "What?"
"Through the window. I was in the building across the street. I watched you fuck her."
Dean watched realization, followed swiftly by outrage, make their way across the face he loved most.
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
"Sam, I'm tryin-"
"No! Don't feed me some bullshit line! You watched us? You had no right doing something like that! That is private and intimate and...why the hell would you do that, Dean? What, were you trying to check out my technique? Wanted to make sure you were still the pimp daddy of the two of us? Look, I may not have as much experience as you, but I don't fuck for the sake of fucking, okay?"
"I know, Sammy, I just-" he stopped and chuckled. "Did you really just say 'pimp daddy?' "
"Now's not the time, Dean!"
"No. No, you're right. Look, I guess... I wanted to see what you were like when worry wasn't lining your face, okay? I never knew you, Sammy. You were gone for so long and out of this life, and...I wanted to know what it was like for you when you weren't thinking about demons and spirits and stakes and silver and the Colt and..." he almost choked on the word, "Dad."
"So you thought you'd watch me fuck someone? That only makes sense in your warped, backward mind, Dean! No one-"
"I know, okay? I know I crossed a line-"
"Crossed a line?"
"Yeah, crossed a line, Sam! Okay, I admit it! What I did was stupid! But I don't regret it for one second."
"Oh, why, because you established that you're the better lay out of the two of us? Because now you can give me a coaching session on how to fuck a woman? Madison only came twice before I was inside her - should I have held out for three or four? Excuse me, but it had been a while okay? I don't crawl into bed with every warm body I come across like some of us in this room-"
"Okay, that's enough, Sam. I'm trying to explain someth-"
"Explain, then!"
"I'm trying, you little bastard!"
"Well, you're not doing a great job, Dean, because I'm not hearing you!"
"You'd hear me if you'd stop flapping your gums for two goddamn seconds!"
"All right, fine! Fine! I'm all ears, Dean! Tell me why you're so happy you got to see me fuck a girl, if it wasn't to criticize my technique or find out who's got the bigger dick. Go ahead. Hit me with your best shot." Sam stood ramrod straight against the wall, his arms crossed, his eyebrows raised expectantly, his eyes pinned on Dean's face.
Silence.
"That's what I thought," sniffed Sam. He turned to go, his hand on the doorknob. "I'm outta here."
"You were the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen."
Sam froze, unsure he'd heard the words uttered so lowly behind him. He turned, his eyes searching his brother's face. Dean did not return his gaze.
"What did you just say?" Sam's voice came out a whisper.
Dean closed his eyes and took a deep, shaky breath, visibly bracing himself. When his eyes opened, they fastened on Sam with a piercing intensity that paralyzed him, and strangely, made his blood sing.
"You were beautiful, Sammy. Beautiful and fierce, and I couldn't look away, even after I became ashamed of myself. You were grace and power and..." his voice betrayed him, and he faltered. "I couldn't look away."
Sam was silent a moment, and studied his older brother's face. Finally, he spoke.
"Why are you telling me this?"
Dean's mouth opened, but no sound came out, and he stared helplessly at Sam, his eyes a mystery.
Sam dropped his hand from the doorknob and took a step closer to where Dean sat on the corner of the motel room bed, his elbows resting on his knees.
"What was the point, Dean?" He took another step.
Finally, Dean seemed to find his voice again. "Sammy, I just...thought you should know."
"Know what?" Sam asked quietly, closing the remaining distance between them and standing in front of Dean so close that Dean could smell him, smell the aromas of soap and shaving cream and a scent buried deeper under those chemical ones; something utterly Sam, the most familiar smell in the world. Oh, God, he wished Sam wouldn't stand so close. Dean didn't dare look away from his face, didn't dare drop his gaze to what was inches away from his eye level, inches away from his mouth-
Shit. Fuck. Hell. Damn. That was the wrong thing to think about. Thank god, thank god he'd untucked his shirt, because he could not deal with Sam seeing the physical proof of what his closeness did to Dean. And as he had several times before, Dean had the distinct feeling that his brother remembered what had happened in that bar in Duluth and was just trying to get Dean to admit to it. The thought that Sam might remember, might even want it again…he had to suppress a shudder.
He swallowed, closing his eyes for a moment as he imagined Sam's hand coming to rest on his shoulder, his only-recently calloused fingers sliding up to cup his face as their eyes met in complete understanding. Sam would only need to nod, and Dean's hands would move like lightning, grabbing at Sam's belt, unbuckling, unfastening, unzipping, pulling, tearing at the barrier between them until Sam was exposed to him, his in a way he'd never been anyone's, because this was Dean, and he loved Sam best. Sam's taste would be like his smell, only more, and Dean wouldn't be able to help himself, keep himself from groaning in desperate delight as he gorged on his little brother's cock-
"Dean?"
Dean's eyes snapped open as he was brought back to a very complicated present. He was sweating, his breathing labored and uneven. Sam's face was full of concern. Dean had no idea how long he'd been submerged in his helpless fantasy, but Sam was obviously worried, and over his anger.
"Dean, are you getting sick?"
Dean forced a laugh.
"Oh, come on now, Sammy. You know I've always been sick."
Sam gave a grudging laugh. "Well, that's one thing we agree on, anyway." He gently smacked Dean upside the head and turned around, retreating. "I'm gonna go on a beer run." And just like that, the matter was dropped.
Disappointment warred with relief at the loss of Sam's closeness, but Dean's face betrayed neither. "Okay, Sammy. I'll be here when you get back."
"I know."
"Be-"
"Careful, I know. I will. You worry about me too much."
But you're so fragile, he thought in response. Out loud he said, "Worried about you, hell. I love my car. Be careful with her."
"Funny."
"You thought I was joking? Hey, bring me some pie!"
Sam laughed as he closed the door behind him.
Dean stared at the door where Sam had just been.
This was getting harder and harder. Literally. Dean's eyes closed again and he flopped back on the bed, his hard-as-rock dick pushing against his tight jeans and making him groan. With rushed, jerky movements, he reached down and unzipped them, pulling his cock free.
The resulting relief made him groan softly, and he lay back down, letting the cool air wash around his jutting shaft. After a moment, he sighed, then sat up and pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor. Rising, he shed his remaining clothes as he crossed to the bathroom and turned on the shower.
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The Earth is Still Part of the Sky