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Trespass	By : kattanon Category: S through Z > The Shield Views: 2004 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own The Shield, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 19
- 20
- 21
Disclaimer: - I don�t own any of the characters of The Shield, they all bg tog to Shawn Ryan and FX.
Trespass � Chapter 20.
Since he�d already thrown up at Dutch�s house earlier on Vic didn�t have much left in his stomach. The dry retching this left him with soon made his stomach muscles ache, and an uncomfortable throbbing begin in his h It It seemed that the painkiller the ER doctor had given him was starting to wear off. When his body finally stopped trying to turn itself inside out he closed his eyes and rested his head against the cool side of the cubicle. He could hear raised voices outside in the corridor and knew that it was Claudette and Aceveda. He ght ght grimly that Claudette probably wanted to rip him a new one and who could blame her. He had sat in that pastel room and told her he had orally raped her partner, her friend. If he had been in her position he would want to strike out too. Abruptly the voices ceased and he breathed a sigh of relief. Although Vic knew a confrontation with Claudette would come he would really rather it not be now. With a groan he pulled himself upright and had to rest against the wall for a moment while he waited for his head to stop spinning. He half stumbled over to the sinks and turned on the cold water tap in one and cupping his hand under the frigid stream he scooped up a handful and washed it over his face. He breathed in sharply as the cold liquid covered his skin, but it felt refreshing and he repeated the process twice more. That sense of overwhelming exhaustion was still lurking in the background, but Vic just needed to keep going for a few hours more. He needed to contact Shane to check in with him and see if he�d heard anything from his friend at Westwood about how the investion won was going, the forensic team should be getting some preliminary results by now. This was an attack on a cop; one of their own, it would be a top priority he knew. He also wanted to know if the Strike Team had managed to turn up anything on the streets. Sick bastards like this sometimes liked to brag about what they�d done and if they had breathed a word about it Vic wanted to know. However, he didn�t feel he could do any of this yet, he had something much more important to occupy him. First he needed to know how Dutch was; he needed to know that he was still alive, that he�d recover, physically at least. Reluctantly Vic looked up at himself in the mirror over the sink. After what he�d done to Dutch Vic hadn�t been sure if he�d be able to face himself in the mirror again. He remembered that time in the car thief�s bathroom when him and the team had just cleaned up their stolen drugs and wiped away the traces of it from the overdosed guy at the kitchen table. Vic himself was in the bathroom after having flushed a kilo of coke down the toilet seconds before Aceveda had shown up. As he gazed at his blood-shot eyes Vic could remember catching himself in the mirror that night. He hadn�t liked what he�d seen staring back at him then, what he�d become and he didn�t like it now.
He was startled out of his self-recrimination by the sound of the bathroom door opening. He didn�t turn around instead he switched the tap back on and began to wash his hands. re wre was silence as whoever had entered the bathroom merely stood by the door hinghing him and saying nothing.c igc ignored them and continued to wash his hands, he was pretty sure he knew who it was anyway. His guess wasved ved correct when the sound of a throat being cleared was followed by the still shocked voice of Captain David Aceveda,
"Lehane and Gregory are going to wait here until the surgeon comes and talks to us."
"What they want to see if this is going to turn out to be a murder investigation instead of just a rape and assault?" Vic replied bitterly.
"Probably�just as you would if you were them�or just as Dutch would if it was his case. You can�t resent them for doing their job Vic; we all have to work together on this. That means we have to pull together, not go off doing our own thing, looking for our own brand of justice." Aceveda told him.
Vic turned, leaning back against the cool porcelain of the sink behind him, and regarded Aceveda keeping his expression neutral at the Captain�s words.
"You implying something?" He asked.
Aceveda sighed, he�d just butted heads with Claudett the the corridor, stopping her from following Vic and making matters worse by taking her frustration and anger out on him. In the end a nurse had come up to them and told them in no uncertain terms that if they didn�t stop it they would by escorted from the hospital and not allowed back. Now he had to try and reason with Vic Mackey, not something he�d ever had much success with in the past.
"Come on Vic, don�t think that I don�t know that the fact you�re too personally involved in this case and so can�t investigate it is going to stop you from trying. If I was in your place I would want in too, but you have to let Lehane and Gregory do their jobs. If you try to do things on your own and you get carried away, make a mistake in procedure then you know as well as I do what could happen. I don�t want to have to be the one to explain to Dutch that the men who did this to him walked because you got sloppy and broke the rules. Besides it�s not only for Dutch�s sake, you�re a victim here as well Vic, they hurt you too."
Vic snorted in derision at these words, and Aceveda had to resist the urge to flinch backwards, away from the bitter self-hatred that huld uld see shining out of Vic�s eyes. Contacting the department shrink had been on his list of things to do after they knew how Dutch was, but now David realised that it would be for Vic as well as Dutch. He was only now beginning to realise the full extent of the damage that this attack had done to these two men.
"Oh yeah, I really suffered! Christ didn�t you hear what I said just now? They did all those things to Dutch not to me. No, I just completely betrayed him�he asked me to help him and what did I end up doing� Fuck I came�what kind of a person does that mae?&qe?" Vic turned away from Aceveda regretting saying so much.
Taking a step towards Vic Aceveda tried to make Vic see that it wasn�t his fault. Although Vic had said that all those awful things had been done to Dutch and not to him, David wasn�t so sure. Physically Dutch had been the one to suffer, but David could see that part of the gunmen�s game had been to make Vic suffer vicariously. The final part of their game had been the most evil in his opinion, to make fee feel like he was one of them, they�d obviously gone out of their way to inflict as much psychological damage, as well as physical damage.
"You couldn�t help that�it�s�it�s a physiological response. It doesn�t make you a rapist Vic." He said softly.
Vic seemed to fold in on himself, lowering his head to look at the floor. Aceveda had to strain to hear his words,
"Well why don�t we ask Dutch when he wakes up what he thinks huh."
"Dutch isn�t going to blame you Vic." Aceveda tried to reassure him.
Raising his head again to look at Aceveda Vic asked,
"Oh and why shouldn�t he� I did it�and I must of enjoyed it right, after all it was my cum he had to try and not puke up!"
"Do you blame him." Aceveda asked.
Puzzled Vic frowned, shaking his head he said,
"I don�t understand�blame him for what?"
"For letting those men have sex with him�for not being able to stop them. I mean what do you think�maybe he enjoyed it huh?"
Vic took a step towards Aceveda his hands clenching into fists,
"Of course I don�t blame him�Jesus he did what he did to save my life. He didn�t enjoy it and it wasn�t sex it was rape!"
"Exactly Vic�and what they did to you that was a form of rape too. They forced you to take part in a sex act against your will. If you hadn�t done what you�d done they would have hurt Dutch even more and killed him�just like Dutch, you had no choice."
Vic didn�t look convinced, but at least he didn�t look like he wanted to rip David�s head off anymore. He partially turned away,
"You have any luck getting Claudette to buy that?" He asked.
"Not yet, but she�ll come around Vic. She�s just hurt and confused and mad as hell. She wants to hit out at someone for this; to blame someone for what�s happened to Dutch and you�re here. She�ll see that none of this was your fault and what you did, well you did it to save Dutch not to hurt him."
"Right." Vic said, sounding unconvinced.
"Are you coming back to the waiting room? Hopefully the doctor will be along soon to talk to us."
"Yeah�I just need a couple more minutes ok." Vic told him.
Nodding his understanding Aceveda turned to leave, but he paused and turned back, his hand resting on the door handle.
"Just remember what I said Vic. Keep out of this investigation�we need it to be by the book so that when we get these animals they get what they deserve and go away for a long time. I know how you feel you know�I�d like five minutes alone in a room with them too."
Vic looked at the Captain�s face and was mildly surprised to see that he meant that. Schooling his face into an expression of complete sincerity Vic prepared to lie to him,
"I know�I understand. I won�t get in the way of this investigation I want them caught too."
Aceveda didn�t look completely convinced but he nodded and once again turned to leave. Vic didn�t want to end this conversation with a lie so he said,
"I want those two to get exactly what they deserve too."
From the open doorway Aceveda once more looked at Vic and frowned at the sincerity he heard behind those words. He frowned because he wasn�t sure if his definition of what the gunmen deserved and Vic�s definition were one and the same thing. However, he couldn�t judge Vic�s expression as he�d turned his back to the door and was once more splashing cold water over his face.
- 19
- 20
- 21
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Trespass