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Hunting Humanity X	By : greenwizard11 Category: Supernatural > Slash - Male/Male Views: 1093 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the Supernatural universe. No money is being made from this story. Strictly entertainment.

Chapter List
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Liam's eyes had turned red while glaring at Chuck. “So what brings you here finally?”

“I'm happy to fill in the blanks, but maybe we should go somewhere where we could actually sit down,” Chuck replied.

Dean still looked a little in shock while the amulet continued to glow in his hand. “We're not going anywhere with you. Okay, how do we even know that you're really Chuck and not just some crazy spell or manifestation.” As soon as Dean finished speaking they were all in the bunker, and Kevin appeared behind Chuck.

“Kevin?” Sam was surprised to see him.

“Guys! You're looking stressed. Especially you,” Kevin motioned to Dean. “It's cool. Trust Chuck. Whatever it is he needs you to do, he must think you can handle it. I always trusted you.”

“Yeah, that ended well,” Dean mumbled.

“How did you...? Are you okay?” Sam asked.

“Yeah, I mean, you know, given the circumstances.”

“Yeah, I don't mean to interrupt. Kind of a plateful here,” Chuck interrupted them. “And, Kevin, you've been in the veil long enough. It's time you had an upgrade.” He waved his hand and Kevin turned into a bright light that floated up through the ceiling.

“Holy crap,” Dean breathed.

“Okay. So, wow, um, Chuck. Well, I guess we don't call you that, huh?” Sam tried to gather his thoughts.

“I prefer it,” Chuck answered.

“Okay, uh, Chuck it is. I'm sorry. You're gonna have to, uh, give us a moment to start to process. We didn't even know you were around. I mean, we knew about Chuck, but we just didn't know about Chuck. I mean, I was hoping you were around. I prayed and I... But I don't know if they got, uh, lost in the spam or if-”

Astiratu put a hand on Sam's shoulder. “Honey, you're babbling.” Then he turned his attention back to Chuck. “Chuck? Really?” He raised an eyebrow. “Of all the names you could pick for yourself, that is what you come up with? And you went and made yourself a pathetic writer. You told us you were a prophet that got visions of my friends here, but really... I'm not impressed.”

Chuck chuckled. “I've missed you.”

“Yeah, um...” Dean ran a hand through his hair. “While I gather my thoughts on other things, I've always wanted to know, what is the deal with...?” he motioned to Astiratu.

Chuck shrugged. “You've never been suddenly inspired? I had angels. I had humans. I had the other beings known as gods. I wondered what would happen if I rolled all three into one soul. And then I wondered what would happen if I added a little piece of myself.”

“You mean there's some of you in him?” Sam tried to wrap his mind around that.

“Yes. I'm mostly pleased with the outcome. You've probably noticed that he's a little difficult to handle at times, but I enjoyed the challenge. All of my other creations were in such awe of me, and never argued. He argues.”

“I am standing right here,” Astiratu grumbled. “So you don't need to talk like I'm not. What I still want to know is why you finally show up now. I mean, we've been running ourselves ragged trying to clean up this mess, but we can't. And Sam has been praying to you, and I've been wondering why the hell you left me to deal with everything.”

“Well it is your mess,” Chuck pointed out. “I mean, saving Dean at all costs, that's what you two do, but this time it set my sister free. But I am here now. I'm getting that not everyone's totally on board.”

“Here's the thing, um, Chuck,” Dean started. “And I mean no disrespect. Um, you came back to help with the Darkness, and that's great. That's, you know, it's fantastic. Um, but you've been gone a long, long time. And there's so much crap that has gone down on the Earth for thousands of years. I mean, plagues and wars, slaughters. And you were, I don't know, writing books, going to fan conventions. Were you even aware, or did you just tune it out?”

“I was aware, Dean.”

“But you did nothing. And, again, I'm not trying to piss you off. You know, I don't want to turn into a pillar of salt.”

“Don't believe everything you read,” Astiratu said. “I mean, he is a lot of things. For instance, he's a total ass. But humans make things up.”

“You're starting to push it,” Chuck warned.

“Forgive me if I can't just flip a switch and stop being royally pissed at you.”

“Okay,” Dean pulled Astiratu back a little. “My thing is... People pray to you. People build churches for you. They fight wars in your name, and you did nothing.”

“You're frustrated. I get it. Believe me, I was hands on. Real hands on for, wow, ages. I was so sure if I kept stepping in, teaching, punishing, that these beautiful creatures that I created would grow up. But it only stayed the same. And I saw that I needed to step away and let my baby find its way. Being over involved is no longer parenting. It's enabling.”

“But it didn't get better.”

“I told him it never would,” Astiratu commented.

“You did say that,” Chuck nodded. “But I've been mulling it over. And from where I sit, I think it has.”

“Well, from where I sit, it feels like you left us and you're trying to justify it,” Dean argued.

“I know you had a complicated upbringing, Dean, but don't confuse me with your dad.”

“You could have stayed and just been less hands on,” Astiratu pointed out. “What you did was flat out selfish.”

Chuck sighed. “If that's how you see it... But justifying myself is not why I came here. You have to understand this about the Darkness. She's relentless, a force beyond human comprehension. It's the only reason I came off the sidelines.”

“Must have been great being her brother, huh?” Sam mused.

“It was the worst. Always telling me what to do, making me do what she wanted. I mean, you guys know how that works.”

“So, where is she?” Dean asked.

“No freaking idea, fellas. She's warded herself specifically against me. What have you come up with?”

“Zip, and we've been at it for months.”

“Well, matter of time. I've always had faith in you, even if you didn't return the favor. Where's the guest room? I could use a shower.”

“Uh, it's, um, just down the hallway, the fourth door on the left,” Sam pointed the way.

“Hey, Chuck. You know that she's got Lucifer, right?” Dean said.

“Yeah.”

“The way we heard it, um, last time when you bottled up the Darkness, it took more than just you. I mean, we heard that Lucifer was involved,” Sam said.

“No.”

“No?” Dean raised an eyebrow.

“Lucifer was perhaps my greatest hope and my bitterest disappointment. Do you think if I could have trusted him for a moment, I would have put him in the cage? And I wasn't gonna mention this, but thank you so much for springing him.”

Sam bit his lip. “That wasn't really the plan.”

“Now, as bad as he was, after all this time in prison, he's probably worse. And by now, he could have formed an alliance with Amara. Not walking into that trap, guys. So, no. Thus spake the Lord.”

“And you're full of bullshit,” Astiratu crossed his arms.

“Excuse me?” Chuck raised an eyebrow.

“I helped you cage Lucifer. Believe me, was glad to do it. But Amara was before my time, and even when I was around things weren't always so bad. He told you where to find me so I could be thrown in jail. And you know damn well why he knew where I was. I know him. He says he helped you, and while he will bend the truth for his own benefit, he doesn't outright lie.”

Chuck's jaw clenched. “Like I said, none of us knows what he's become since being caged. He's not an option. I accept that you're angry with me, but don't forget who you are speaking to.” With that Chuck stormed away.

Dean let out a breath. “Babe, I know you're quite the force, but please don't take it too far. Even as you are, I really like having you around.”

Astiratu stroked Dean's cheek lightly. “I need to blow off steam, and he knows that. Don't worry so much.”

Later the next afternoon Dean brought a beer out for Sam who was on his laptop. “Anything?” Dean asked.

Sam shook his head. “Nada. You know, I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but, for once, I actually wish Rowena was here. I mean, maybe she could track down Amara. She's done it before.”

“Yeah, but you can bet she and the Book are gonna stay stashed until this whole thing is over.”

“And I am chopped liver?” Astiratu looked up from his place on the floor.

“Are you sensing anything?” Dean asked him.

“I can't sense anything over...” the half angel motioned down the hall.

Dean moved to join his partner on the floor. “Okay, I get the gravity of the situation and all, but I wish you wouldn't strain yourself. I've been meaning to ask Chuck how serious this whole wearing out your body thing is. But when you pass out I don't think it's good. Where is our guest anyway?”

“Sleeping in, I guess,” Sam shrugged.

“Does God sleep?” Dean wondered.

“I know he takes really long showers.”

“Right, and sings, too, like, crappy old folk songs. I had to tell him to cool it three times.”

“You told God to cool it?”

“Yeah, I sleep. And Astiratu has said way worse to him and is still here.”

“You know, I know this is a really strange situation and all, but it's also really amazing, you know? I mean, it's God. There's so many things I want to ask him, uh, like, the planets, you know? Why are they round? Or ears. I always thought they were strange.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Okay, fanboy, calm down. Let's stay focused. We got to find Lucifer before it's too late.”

“Too late?”

“Amara, she's in my head. Hey, I didn't ask for it, okay?” Dean said quickly when he saw a flash of something in Astiratu's eyes. “She just showed up. But she's showing me visions of Lucifer. By Lucifer, I mean Cas, and he looks like crap, like she's really doing a number on him.”

“Let me block her,” Astiratu insisted. “I'm pretty sure I can do that much. It's not good how she fixates on you.”

“No,” Dean shook his head. “I don't like that you're doing what you're doing. That would take too much power, and I want my human back after this. No offense, but I want to see gray eyes instead of red. I... I'm not saying this to hurt you. I'm just very attached to your human self, which is of course an extension of you, smart ass and all.”

“That probably won't happen until this is over and done. Our guest brought me out, and I will stay out while he is around. Can you handle that?”

“I think so. I'm just asking that you be mindful of your limitations. I don't want you going back to heaven just yet.”

“I'd listen to Dean,” Chuck entered the room wearing a robe.

“Is that my robe?” Dean asked.

“Never mind that and ask me what you want to ask me.”

Dean sighed. “Is what Gadreel said true? When Astiratu uses his power, does it wear out his body because it wasn't built to handle it?”

“Yes,” Chuck nodded. “Things didn't happen quite like I planned them. He was never supposed to be a vampire.”

“If I had been given some warning...” Astiratu grumbled.

“Not how it works, and I've told you as much several times. With free will sometimes things don't work out. Still, I sent him to you, Dean, because I had him in mind when I made you.”

“Wait, you made me just for someone else?” Dean was a little irritated at that.

Chuck sighed. “Dean, you really do need to think more before you speak. I'm here to protect you right now, but one day you'll end up crucified upside down. Yes, I wanted to make my pet a companion. You still had free will. You could have walked away. But there is a reason you both seem to be what the other needs.”

“I'm starting to think you don't want me,” Astiratu mumbled.

“I do!” Dean insisted. “I wouldn't put up with the crap that I do if I didn't. I just hate being jerked around, and you know that. And now I'm being told I was made specially for you. Makes me feel... I don't know, but not good.”

“But it should make you feel good,” Chuck said. “His purpose is also your purpose. You rid the world of bad things. Do you have any bacon?”

“You eat bacon?” Dean found that a surprise.

“Yeah.”

“Hey, guys, this just came up,” Sam called out for their attention. “Looks like that fog, the, um, Amara fog, uh, hit another town.”

“And?” Dean moved to look at the screen.

“And this one wasn't as lucky as the last one. Thousands died. Uh, everybody died, except for one man.”

Astiratu tilted his head. “That's a little odd.”

Dean looked to Chuck. “How'd you miss that one?”

“She's baiting me. I can't respond every time. I won't be manipulated.”

“Yeah, but thousands of people are dead.”

“Unfortunately. So find her.”

The half angel rolled his eyes. “I do all the work while you eat bacon. Typical.”

Chuck's eyes narrowed. “I won't be manipulated by you either.”

“Who said I was manipulating? It is pretty typical of you. You went off to the sidelines because you just didn't want to bother anymore. Sure, you did a few things here and there when you felt like it. Does anyone else get to just shrug off their duty? No.”

“You could walk away if you really wanted to. But we both know that's not in you. Quite a few times now you've nearly killed yourself for the cause.”

Astiratu huffed and turned away from Chuck. “We need to find that survivor. He's probably a prophet.”

They were driving down the road when Dean's phone rang. He groaned when he saw it was Metatron. “What?” he answered.

“I notice you've been in touch with Chuck. Well, I've got some information you're gonna need to know.”

“Okay, say it.”

“No. It's got to be in person, something I got to show you.”

Dean glanced in the rear view mirror to Astiratu with a silent question. The half angel shrugged. “He doesn't have his grace. He's human. Nothing we can't handle if he's being his usual self.”

Dean made arrangements to meet, but they continued to where the lone survivor was being kept. They entered a police station in their suits and Dean held out a hand to an older gentleman. “Professor Redfield. FBI.”

The man shook Dean's hand. “Call me Donatello. Yeah. I'm named after him,” he chuckled.

“The Mutant Ninja Turtle?” Dean was a little confused.

“The, uh, Renaissance sculptor,” Donatello corrected him.

“Right, of course.”

“The cops think I'm a terrorist. I teach chemistry at the university. I lead a quiet life. I have a cat! Had a cat.”

“Well, we are, uh, sorry for your loss. Just a few questions. Um, other than the fog, did you notice anything or anyone that seemed out of place on the street that night?” Sam asked.

“It all happened so fast. I, uh... It was like it came out of nowhere. We hardly ever get fog, and never like that. It was horrible. They were clutching their throats like they were choking. And, oh. Their bodies, oh, my god, these terrible black streaks. And that's when it happened. It was like nothing I've ever felt before in my life. It was like my head was exploding, only not with pain, with knowledge and clarity! Things that I'd never known before. Symbols and voices, in languages I don't speak! Then horrible, horrible visions of destruction and death. You think I'm crazy.”

“Not really,” Astiratu assured him. “Give us a moment.” He huddled with Sam and Dean. “You get that this is all sounding familiar, right?”

Dean nodded. “Yeah, like when Kevin found out he was a prophet.”

“Yeah, but I thought Crowley rounded up all the future prophets and tried to kill them,” Sam said.

Dean nodded. “Yeah, and we rescued them and Donatello wasn't a part of that, but, yeah, it's possible Crowley missed a few.”

“And, obviously, he had no idea he was next in line after Kevin, so...” Sam was trying to piece it together.

“That's kinda how it works,” Astiratu said. “The poor bastards are clueless until their number comes up and they're hit with God power.”

“And Amara's fog, even though it was her, and meant to kill...” Dean was trying to understand.

The half angel shrugged. “Amara is a god, even if she's not the one who's supposed to wake the prophets.”

Dean sighed. “Alright, I need a coffee.”

Sam and Astiratu went back to Donatello. “Am I under arrest?” he asked nervously.

“I don't think so,” Astiratu answered. “Just one more thing though.” He scribbled something on a piece of paper and showed it to Donatello. “Can you read that for me?”

“Oh, I can't. I don't know anything about it.” He looked at the strange writing a moment. “Behold the face of God.” A shocked expression took over his face. “That came right to me. Who speaks this language?”

“Angels,” Sam answered.

They decided to take Donatello back to the bunker. They agreed that he might be of some use. They explained everything to him on the drive back, but he didn't take to it well. “I can't be a prophet. I'm an atheist and a chemist! I believe in molecules, not God.”

“Alright, well, we're pretty sure that prophets don't even know they're in the game until they've actually been touched by God, so...” Dean said.

“I was touched by God?”

“More like his sister, Amara,” Astiratu dropped that on him.

“He has family?”

“Yeah,” Sam nodded. “She wants him gone so she can annihilate the universe. That's the headline.”

“What?” Donatello was getting freaked out.

“And since you might have a hotline to her, we're hoping you can help us find her,” Dean explained.

“Why would you want to find her?”

“We got to rescue this guy she's holding,” Sam answered.

“Who is it?”

“Lucifer, her nephew.”

“Who's possessing an angel at the moment,” Dean added.

Donatello tried to reach for the door handle to make an escape. Astiratu grabbed him. “I know this is a lot of information at once, but just breathe.”

“I can't do this!” Donatello insisted.

“You wouldn't be a prophet if you couldn't.”

“No, I promise you I can't.”

Dean sighed. “Look, we can't force you to do this. You've got to want this.”

“It's like asking me to believe in Santa Claus.”

“Okay, look, we're not asking you to believe that this is true, just act like you do. People do it all the time.”

Donatello shuddered. “What?” Sam asked.

“I don't know. I think I'm sensing something. Something big. Could it be him?”

“Probably,” Astiratu answered. “We are getting close, and I sense him too.”

“So why can't you sense this Amara?”

“She's cloaking herself. She knows about me. She doesn't know about you.”

Dean and Astiratu went inside the bunker to find Chuck at the map table watching something on a laptop. “Hey, Chuck. We, uh, found someone. I think he's the next prophet,” Dean said.

“Neat,” Chuck replied without a lot of enthusiasm.

“Is that my computer?”

“I've never seen so much porn. Not in one sitting.”

“I uh... I never got around to getting rid of it,” Dean said quickly as he closed the laptop. “So, uh, listen. He's a little nutted out about the whole booga booga of it all, so maybe just dial back the God stuff.”

The door opened again and Sam came in with Donatello. “Alright, you're safe. Come on.”

“Donatello, good to see ya. Sorry about your cat,” Chuck greeted him.

“You know me?” Donatello was surprised.

“I made you. I made all of you, even the ones who aren't born yet.”

Donatello turned a little pale. “Oh, my god. It's you. Good to meet you, Sir! Your celestial magnificence, your-”

“Overdoing it there just a little,” Astiratu interrupted him.

“He just kind of goes by Chuck,” Sam said.

“So, we good? Y'all signed up?” Chuck asked Donatello.

“Uh... I guess you know that I was an atheist, until ten minutes ago. Is that an issue?”

“Not for me. I mean, I believe in me. But your skepticism is to be expected. I did include free will in the kit. Welcome aboard.”

Sam, Dean, and Astiratu went to meet Metatron at a bar as requested. Sam sat down beside him. “Alright, we're here. Don't try to pull any crap.”

“And what variety of crap could I possibly pull? I've lost my grace. Look at me. I got nothing.”

“Okay, why did you have to see us? What's so urgent?” Dean asked.

“So, I, uh, notice you've been in touch with Chuck. A.K.A., you know who.”

“Yeah. Is this going anywhere?” Sam asked. “Yes, Chuck agreed to take on Amara.”

“He said that? Used those words?”

“Pretty much. So, what, he's not confronting Amara?”

“Oh, no. He's going to. He's gonna meet with her. He's just not gonna take her down. He's gonna sacrifice himself. Let her do whatever she wants with him.”

Sam raised an eyebrow. “Do you really expect us to buy this?”

“No. Of course not. Here. Buy this.” Metatron tossed a manuscript in front of them. “Ignore the typos, but read it. It's in his own words. It's not an autobiography. It's a suicide note.”

“That son of a bitch,” Astiratu grumbled as he read a few words.

The next day Dean and Astiratu met Chuck in a nearby park. They walked up to him sitting on a bench. “You wanted to talk. This seemed as good a place as any.” He was watching a boy play in a sandbox with blocks. “Look at him, endlessly optimistic. The wind blows over his tower, he rebuilds. Always gets me.”

“If that's so, why are you bailing? When you see Amara, you're throwing in the towel?” Dean came right out with it.

Chuck sighed. “Metatron. Loose lips. But you think I'm a dick. Why do you care?”

“Because before you went MIA you did a lot.”

“Thank you. And what you call throwing in the towel, I call strategy.”

“Where's a shovel,” Astiratu growled.

Chuck shook his head. “You think threatening me will get you anywhere?”

“Not a threat. It'll make me feel better because you know how I hate idiots.”

“How is death by your sister a strategy?” Dean asked.

“I know her. Her beef is with me.”

“Yeah, but I still don't understand how dying is a blueprint for success.”

“I won't be dying. I'll be caged. I trade myself for everything I created. It goes on.”

“Okay, well, the Amara that I know is a mountain of pissed off. I mean, she spent a gazillion years in solitary. The only thing she's thinking is it's her turn.”

“And I'll give it to her, as long as she accepts the deal.”

“Exactly what would keep her from saying she accepts the deal, then as soon as you are caged, destroying everything anyway?” Astiratu asked. “I thought you were smarter than this, but during your vacation you must have caught a case of stupid.”

“You have a point,” Chuck admitted. “But if that happens, there is you. And you have Dean and Sam. Trust that I knew what I was doing when I put you three together.”

“I know he's powerful, all right...” Dean tried to gather his thoughts. “But aren't you forgetting what you said about his body not being able to handle it? And me? What am I going to do against your sister?”

“Astiratu is my firewall between light and darkness, and very little has ever gotten past him. You and your brother were an upgrade to make him stronger. I know you worry, but I wouldn't be taking this chance unless I knew he could handle it.”

“Part of her is in me too, isn't it?” Astiratu realized something.

“Yes,” Chuck nodded. “A very small part. Like I said, I was inspired. I wanted to see if creation and destruction could coexist. I made the creation part stronger, but when you are pissed off...”

“That still... You can't just rely on me to clean up every mess.”

“How does this revelation change anything?” Dean asked.

“As part of her, he can connect, feed off her,” Chuck tried to explain. “It's complicated.”

“And I still don't understand.”

“I do,” Astiratu said. “I did it the first time I met her. That's how I didn't pass out, at least not until I was hit in the head.”

“She was still growing then,” Dean argued.

“And could have been taken out then and there,” Chuck said. “She could probably sense that, which was why the rock. Astiratu, there's a reason I left you in charge. You're... Well, a lot of things could be said about you, but you're my strongest creation, and you always do what is right in the end.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence, but this argument is not over.”

Later that afternoon Dean and Astiratu met Donatello in the war room. “I got you a beer. I don't know if you drink,” Dean offered the beer.

“I do now,” Donatello took it.

Dean sat down with a sigh. “I don't know if Chuck is leaning our way.”

“You don't know?” Donatello was a little alarmed by that.

“As far as I can tell he isn't,” Astiratu said. “When he makes up his mind on something...”

“If we do get Lucifer for the added muscle, then maybe he'll play ball,” Dean said.

“I thought they hated each other,” Donatello was confused.

“They do.”

“And I hate Lucifer's guts, but for the sake of the world, I'm going to have to resist the urge to dismember him,” Astiratu sighed.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Donatello was worried.

“It'll be fine,” Dean assured him.

Sam entered with Metatron. “Alright, Metatron. Make it quick. Don't touch anything.”

“Fine. Dean! Thanks for inviting me.”

Dean scoffed. “Inviting you? You've been circling the building all night. You sent me two hundred text messages with dumbass emojis. You got three minutes.”

Metatron turned to Donatello. “Oh. Donatello! Pleasure to meet you. Metatron, scribe of God. I was there when you were designed. I wrote your name on the inside of the angels' eyelids.”

“He's freaking me out,” Donatello seemed a little scared.

“Okay. You said you wanted to help. Besides world class douchery, what do you have to offer?” Dean asked Metatron.

“Oh, nothing. I just transcribed the angel tablet and know all the spells. And I know what makes Amara tick. And I had a relationship with the big guy for eons. Shall I keep going?”

“As much as I hate to admit this, he kind of has a point,” Sam said.

“Yeah, but I have everything he does, except the angel tablet thing,” Astiratu pointed out. “If I had the tablet I could read it, or Donatello could.”

“I could?” Donatello was still having trouble taking it all in.

“That's kinda what profits do, though it isn't an easy task.”

“You need all the help you can get, even douche help,” Metatron argued. “Astiratu, I know you too, and you know I'm right. You're nothing if not pragmatic.”

“Just keep in mind that I have a violent temper as well.”

“And since when did you jump on the God wagon?” Dean asked. “You never used to give a damn.”

“Well, I didn't, at one time. Now that he's gone all kamikaze, leaving us with the Darkness, I... I was by his side since the creation. He believed in me. If there's something I can do to help save him and his creation, then it seems like I should.”

Dean sighed. “The plan is to rescue Lucifer from Amara. Then he teleports us out of Amara's hideout and we convince Chuck to use him to fight her.”

Metatron scoffed at that. “That's your plan? Do you even know where Amara is?”

“Um, I think I might know where she is,” Donatello said. “I've been getting this vibe. Uh, it's like a ping in my cerebral cortex.”

“Oh, so either Amara or a stroke. And how are we supposed to keep Amara busy while we're liberating Lucifer?”

“Leave that to me,” Dean said. “I don't know how long I'll be able to distract her, so move quick. I can't believe I'm saying this because it involves Lucifer and not killing him, but Astiratu, you're in charge. If she comes back before you're out of there, do your thing.”

Sam drove to the building Donatello was pretty sure Amara was using after Dean left to lure her away. Sure enough, when they entered the building they found a tied up Lucifer looking badly beaten. Lucifer looked up when they entered. “Oh, goody. Larry, Curly, Moe. Search and rescue? Oh, wow. It's one of Dad's favorites. Your ticket finally got punched, huh? It's wacky, isn't it? One minute, you're nobody. And then, shazam you're Joan of Arc. Let's, uh, hope this ends better than that.”

“Alright, can the small talk. We're busting you out of here,” Sam said.

“Well, it seems fair since I wouldn't be here if you lunatics hadn't set me up to be grabbed by Amara.”

“If you weren't such a limp dick that you got overpowered you wouldn't be here either,” Astiratu made the jab. “Can I just take a moment to enjoy this?”

“No,” Sam growled. “Remember what Dean said, you're leaving your ego at the door. This is about Amara, and we don't have a lot of time.” He turned to Lucifer. “You're gonna help us take her down. If you say no, we'll just leave you here in Abu Ghraib.”

Lucifer chuckled. “Say no? You see what she's done to me? Do I look like a fan? Although, apparently when it comes to her I'm a limp dick.”

“That's why we need teamwork,” Sam sighed. “So you two are both going to have to stuff away your personal issues.”

Metatron started chanting words in Enochian, trying to free Lucifer, though it didn't seem to be going well at first. “Did you grab this from the steno pool?” Lucifer was getting a little frustrated.

“You understand you'll be working with your father. Is that gonna be a problem?” Sam asked.

Lucifer gave a little shrug. “That's family. This is bigger.”

“So, you'll table all the old stuff?”

“What happens in heaven stays in heaven. I'm even cool with working with Astiratu there. We actually make a good team when we join forces. I don't know about him on the other hand.”

“Like you said, this is bigger,” Astiratu responded, though his jaw was clenched a little.

“Metatron, are we getting any closer? Dean can't stall forever.” Sam was getting a little antsy.

“I'm narrowing it down.”

“I could take a crack at it,” Astiratu offered. “Use blunt force. Usually works.”

“No,” Sam shook his head. “You're saving your strength in case Dean can't stall long enough.” In another minute Metatron was able to free Lucifer and he fell to his knees. “Hey, Lucifer, zap us out of here quick!”

“Oh, no can do.”

“What do you mean you can't do it?” Sam was a little panicked.

“Temporarily grounded. Equipment malfunction.”

“Why doesn't that surprise me,” Astiratu mumbled. “Hey, I'm not attacking him,” he said when Sam glared.

“Guys, I'm feeling her! She's coming!” Donatello cried out.

“Alright, we're out of here,” Sam helped Lucifer to his feet. “Metatron, come on.”

“It's okay, Sam. You go.”

“What?”

“I'm serious. I got this.”

Sam turned to Astiratu. “Stow your crap long enough to help me get him in the car.”

They each took an arm and ran out to the Impala, Donatello right behind them. Once everyone was in the car Sam sped away. He flew down the dirt road, but it wasn't long before Amara appeared in front of them. Sam stomped on the breaks, stopping just short of her.

“My turn,” Astiratu said as he got out of the car. “As soon as I have her distracted, floor it.” With a wave of his hand the half angel sent Amara flying.

She picked herself up with a look of shock. “How did you...?”

Astiratu chuckled. “You underestimated your brother. Did you really think he wouldn't have a backup plan?”

She tried to blast him, but he absorbed it and hit back with a lightning bolt that made her cry out in pain with blood seeping from the wound on her chest.

Sam watched all of this and didn't move. “He said to get out of here!” Donatello cried from the backseat.

“Sammy doesn't wanna leave him,” Lucifer said. “Truth be told, neither do I. Though if she did manage to capture him she'd have her hands full.”

Amara managed to get one good hit in that knocked Astiratu into a tree. Then suddenly they were all in the bunker, car and all. “Where are we?” Donatello asked, a bit confused.

“Home,” Sam answered as he got out of the car and went to check on Astiratu who was on the floor with a bloody lip. “You okay?”

“Nothing a hot epsom salt bath won't cure,” the half angel got to his feet.

Chuck entered the room. “Occasionally, I do answer a prayer.” He looked at Lucifer. “You've changed.”

“You've changed,” Lucifer responded.

“I'm really pretty much the same.” With a wave of his hand God healed both Lucifer and Astiratu. “Now I want to see you two kiss and make up. Go on, like old times.”

“Why?” Astiratu was annoyed with that.

“I'm guessing the goal here is for you two to work together again. So make nice. And it would tickle me.”

“I don't know...” Lucifer was unsure. “I still have feelings for him, hard not to, but I'm not in the mood to get my face mauled off by a tasmanian devil.”

“He won't,” Chuck assured him. “It's for his own good. So go on.”

Astiratu mumbled a bunch of curse words in different languages under his breath, but reluctantly leaned in and pressed his lips to Lucifer's. Lucifer wrapped an arm around Astiratu's waist and the kiss lingered until Dean entered the room.

“What the fuck is going on here?” Dean was not happy.

“Chuck made them,” Sam tried to calm his brother down.

“That looked... Well...” Dean couldn't find the right words.

“Just resolving old issues,” Chuck said. “You can't have one team member trying to kill another and expect to be successful. I don't think you have anything to worry about.”

“Do I?” Dean looked to Astiratu.

The half angel moved to stand in front of Dean with a soft sigh. “Since I have a policy of not outright lying to you, I will say some old feelings may have been brought to the surface. But I will also say that that is the past, and what was done cannot be undone. What about you?”

“What do you mean what about me? I didn't put my lips on someone else. I still have a look but no touch policy.”

“Yeah, I've noticed you haven't really touched me either since...”

“Sure I have. We sleep together every night, and why am I on trial?”

“I'm expressing a concern. When I come forward you are more distant than you normally would be. When Lucifer says he still has feelings, he means for me as I am, all of me. Would it be so horrible for you to kiss me?”

Dean bit his lip. “Well, not on demand with everyone watching. But your point is taken. We can discuss it more in private.”

“Fair enough.”

A little while later Sam, Dean, and Astiratu stood outside with Donatello. “Still twitchy, huh? Now you've met God, Lucifer and the Darkness. You're gonna need a spa day,” Dean said. “That or a pair of hookers.”

Donatello chuckled. “Ah, I have to sort it all out to see what comes next. I don't feel much like returning to academia, and I sure as hell can't go back to being an atheist.”

“Yeah, I hear you.”

A cab pulled up and Donatello gave the guys a little smile. “Thank you I guess. And, uh, if there is a tomorrow, given your line of work, I'll probably see you again.”

“Stay tuned, we may need you,” Sam said.

As the cab drove away Dean turned to his brother. “So Metatron took one for the team.”

“Yeah,” Sam nodded.

“Well, I wouldn't have called that.”

“So, you want to tell us about it? I mean Amara obviously figured out something was going on, and she didn't rip your head off.”

“She wants me to be a part of her. Not metaphorically, I'm talking literally. Forever. So in other words, adios.”

“I should have bitch slapped her harder,” Astiratu mumbled.

“Yeah, that whole me keeping my distance thing,” Dean brought the subject up again. “You bitch slapped God's sister. Lucifer, even with a Hand of God, got blasted. Look, when I can pretend that you're a quirky but sweet human, it's easier to be close. Your power scares me a little, because it's like nothing else out there.”

Astiratu met Dean's gaze. “Do you at least trust that I won't hurt you?”

“You haven't so far. It's just like God being in our bunker. A little much to deal with. I was wary of Cas at first too, you know. Monsters I've dealt with most of my life, but...”

“I think I understand.”

Dean stepped forward and tenderly kissed Astiratu. “I do love all of you. I think you'd be a bit much for any mere mortal to handle, but I do really like your spirit.”

The half angel smiled. “That's all I needed to know.”
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Hunting Humanity X