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On the Wings of Maybe	By : OpenPage Category: 1 through F > 21 Jump Street Views: 1468 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own 21JS or the characters. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. All characters and events in this story are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead is coincidental.

Chapter List
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Tom woke at dawn and after a long hot shower, he dressed and ate a nominal breakfast of several mouthfuls of leftover Chinese food. It was too early to visit Booker so he sat on the couch and thought back to the previous night. He had spent hours lying on the small bed with Booker resting in his arms and he had only left when a rather officious nurse threatened to call security. Now, he was desperate to get back to see his lover and because it was a Sunday, they could spend the whole day together without interruption.
When he finally arrived at the private clinic, he felt his heart thumping in excitement as he strode down the quiet corridor. It was important to him that Booker knew how much he loved him and that he would stand by him every step of the way, no matter how long his rehabilitation took. He also needed him to know that those deep feelings would never change, even if Booker’s body never fully recovered. It was an undeniable fact, he was hopelessly and passionately in love and nothing would or could ever alter that.
Walking into Booker’s private room, he pulled up short when he saw his lover lying on the bed with silent tears streaming down his face. “Oh Dennis,” he murmured and hurrying over, he gathered him into his arms. “What’s wrong?”
“E-E-Every-th-thing,” Dennis sobbed. “I-I can’t sp-speak! I c-can’t walk! I c-can’t f-feel anything!”
Tom climbed onto the bed and lying down next to his distressed lover, he held him close and gently caressed his hair. “You’ve got to be patient,” he soothed. “Your rehabilitation has barely begun and—”
“D-Don’t give me … fucking… pl-platitudes!” Dennis slurred but there was no mistaking the anger in his voice. “You have… n-no… idea what… it’s l-like.”
“No I don’t,” Tom replied quietly, “but I’m here for you, whatever you need. We’ll get through this together.”
A long silence hung in the air before Booker struggled out of Tom’s arms. “What I need… is for you… to leave.”
Surprised by Dennis’ words, Tom sat up and gazed down at his friend. “You want me to go? Why?”
Dennis’ left hand clenched into a tight fist. “Because you don’t… want to… be with… someone… like me,” he replied in a faltering voice.
Hanson narrowed his eyes and studied Dennis' face carefully. He could see the look of determination but his troubled eyes told a different story. They were full of panic and they reflected what he was really feeling deep inside his soul… fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of what he knew lay ahead and fear of rejection.
Reaching out his hand, Tom uncurled Dennis’ fingers and gave them a squeeze. “I’m a big boy Dennis, I think I can make up my own mind.”
Snatching his hand away, Booker struggled into a sitting position. “You don’t… understand!” he cried out, his face twisting in anguish. “I can’t… FEEL anything… I’m IMPOTENT!”
The harshness of Dennis’ voice and the grotesqueness of his features startled Tom and his dark eyes portrayed his surprise. It had never occurred to him that the stroke might have affected Dennis in that way. He quickly struggled to regain his composure but he knew it was too late, Dennis had seen the shocked look on his face.
Saddened by Tom’s reaction, Dennis averted his eyes and mumbled a single word. “Leave.”
Swallowing deeply, Tom pulled himself together and reaching out a hand, he placed it under Dennis’ chin and tilted his face until their eyes met. “No.”
Booker’s eyes clouded over and he swatted Tom’s hand away. “I don’t want… you here,” he stated in a flat voice.
Staring back determinedly, Tom replied calmly, “Too bad, I’m staying.”
Blind rage consumed Booker’s body and his face turned red as he began to scream, “GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!” but when Hanson remained seated it eventually became too much for him and lifting his left arm, he slapped his lover across the face.
Drawing in a sharp breath, Tom’s hand flew to his cheek and his eyes widened in shock. His face stung from the force of the slap but when he saw the distressed look in Booker’s eyes, he quickly forgot his pain.
“Why won’t… you… leave?” Dennis sobbed.
The anguished look on his lover’s face caused a physical pain in Tom’s heart and gathering him into his arms, he held him close. “Because I love you,” he murmured against his ear. “Don’t push me away Dennis, please don’t push me away.”
“But I’m… broken,” Booker whispered in a voice filled with anguish.
Despite the pain in his heart, Tom smiled and gave Dennis a tender kiss. “Then we fix you, one step at a time.”
**
It seemed to Tom that the working day had lasted a lifetime but when the clock above the filing cabinets finally struck three, he pushed his chair back and hurried from the Chapel. He had managed to convince Fuller that he had a doctor’s appointment but the truth was he was desperate to see Booker and find out what frame of mind he was in after his visit the day before. The clinic classified Sundays as ‘family time’ and the only day when patients did not receive any form of treatment and therefore, he expected to find Dennis tired after hours of both physical and speech therapy. However, he hoped Dennis had made some small progress and that his spirit would be lifted enough to want to keep on fighting through the frustration and pain.
Entering Dennis’ room, he immediately stopped when he saw him clutching a walking frame whilst attempting to drag his right foot across the floor, all under the watchful eye of a hard-faced woman. As much as it pained him to witness the feeble attempt, he managed to keep the anguish out of his eyes. It broke his heart to see his lover struggling like a toddler taking his first steps but he quickly pushed the negativity from his mind and feigned a cheerful smile. “It looks like you’re working hard, I’ll come back in a minute.”
“No,” Booker replied immediately. “I’m done.”
Mary Donaldson’s expression darkened. “You’re done when I say you’re done Dennis. Now push the frame forward and take another step.”
“I SAID… I’M DONE!” Booker yelled and his body began to tremble with anger. “Now help me… back… to my bed!”
Tom remained silent as he watched the scene unfold in front of him. Mary placed her hands on her hips and gave her client a penetrating stare. “And I said push the frame forward and take another step.”
Unable to hold his tongue any longer, Tom stepped forward. “I think he’s had enough.”
Mary gave him a derisive look. “And who are you?”
Balling his hands into tight fists, Tom struggled to contain his anger. “I’m his boyfriend and I’m telling you, he’s had enough!”
Both Dennis’ and Mary’s eyes widened in surprise. Dennis’ because it was the first time Tom had openly confessed that he was in a homosexual relationship and Mary because she never would have believed that Dennis was gay. But Tom was too focused on his lover’s distress to realize the emotional impact his simple declaration had made and rushing forward he wrapped his arm around Dennis’ waist and slowly helped him the short distance back to his bed. When he had him resting comfortably, he turned and faced Mary Donaldson. “You can go now,” he instructed in a cold voice, “and close the door behind you.”
Somewhat taken aback by the frostiness of Tom’s tone, Mary placed the frame against the wall and walked towards the door. Turning her head, she raised her eyebrows when she saw the two men lying in each other’s arms. “I’ll be back again tomorrow.”
“I can’t… wait,” Booker mumbled sarcastically and when Mary left the room, he turned his head back towards Tom. “Hey.”
Tom smiled and brushed his lips against Dennis’ pout. “Hey yourself,” he murmured softly. “Miss me?”
“Yeah,” Dennis sighed wearily. “It’s been… a long… day.”
Lightly tracing his fingers down Booker’s side, Tom kissed him again. “Can I do anything to help you relax?” he murmured against his lips.
Booker’s body froze and he pushed Tom’s hand away. “Don’t.”
Propping himself up on his elbow, Hanson gazed down at his lover. “Why not?” he asked softly. “I thought if we spent some time together maybe you’d start to feel—”
“Aroused?” Booker spat back angrily. “Is that… all… you care… about?”
Tom sighed. “It’s nice to know you’re still jumping to conclusions. I was going to say more confident.”
“Oh,” Booker mumbled. “Sorry.”
A deafening silence echoed throughout the room until Tom finally spoke. He chose his words carefully, not wanting to upset Dennis unnecessarily. “But now that you’ve said it, maybe it’s not such a stupid idea,” he pushed gently. “If you relax and let me do all the work, maybe you’ll start to feel something.”
Another long silence hung in the air until Booker finally whispered in a trembling voice, “And if I don’t?”
Tom leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. “Then we keep trying.”
Booker considered Tom’s words and after several long minutes, he nodded his head. “Okay.”
Snuggling in close, Tom pressed his lips against Booker’s and kissed him tenderly. He was delighted when his partner parted his lips and allowed his tongue access. Keeping the kiss slow and tender, he placed his hand on Booker’s hip and moved his thumb in a slow, circular motion, hoping that the light stimulation would help him relax. When he heard a low moan, he stretched out his fingers and lightly brushed them over the thin cotton material that covered Dennis’ genitals. As their kiss deepened, his fingers continued to caress Dennis’ cock for several minutes but there was no reaction to his touch; his cock remained flaccid.
Afraid that Booker’s embarrassment would prematurely end his efforts, he broke the kiss and sitting up, his eyes twinkled mischievously. “I’ve got an idea.”
“What idea?” Booker asked slowly
Tom carefully straddled Booker’s legs and waggled his eyebrows theatrically. “Any guesses?” he asked seductively.
Booker’s dark eyes widened in shock. “Tommy… you’ve never… I mean… I don’t want you… to feel… you have—”
Pressing his finger against Dennis’ lips, Tom gave him a loving smile. “Shh, I want to. So just close your eyes and relax.”
Booker continued to stare up at Tom for several long moments before slowly closing his eyes. Tom attempted to control his nerves and with shaky hands, he gently pulled down Dennis’ boxers, revealing his limp cock. Leaning forward, he supported himself with his left hand and lowering his head, he pressed his lips against Booker’s cockhead.
A soft moan escaped Dennis’ lips and encouraged by the reaction, Tom grew bolder. Swirling his tongue around the coronal ridge he gently took hold of the base of Dennis’ shaft and sucked on the tip. Tender fingers ran through his hair and he heard a soft voice. “More.”
Smiling to himself, he parted his lips and took Dennis’ into his mouth. The feeling was strange but not unpleasant and he started to relax. Applying a small amount of pressure with his lips, he moved his mouth up and down Dennis’ flaccid cock. A minute passed and he suddenly felt movement against his tongue and he realized that Dennis was slowly becoming hard. He continued his exploration, stopping only to suck on the tip before again taking Dennis’ growing cock back into his mouth. When his lover was fully erect, he could taste precum and his own cock swelled as the salty juices coated his tongue. Spurred on by his own arousal, he increased his pace and as his head bobbed up and down, he could feel rough fingers pulling at his hair and then Dennis’ loud voice suddenly cut through the silence. “Oh fuck… oh Tommy… ahhh… ahhh… AHHH!”
Warm salty fluid shot down the back of Tom’s throat and fighting to control his gag reflex, he swallowed deeply. Once again, the taste was strange but not revolting and he smiled against Booker’s softening cock. He had given his first blowjob and it had been a success.
Lifting his head, he ignored his own aching erection and grinned at his lover. “Better?” he asked in a teasing voice.
Dennis returned a lopsided smile. “Yeah,” he murmured. “You were… fucking… amazing.”
A deep blush heated Tom’s face and as he pulled up Dennis’ boxers, he heard a soft laugh. “God Hanson… it’s still so easy… to embarrass you.”
Tom positioned himself on the bed next to Dennis and draped an arm around his waist. “Yeah well, what can I say? I’m a choir boy.”
Once again, the sound of Dennis’ laughter echoed around the room and Tom smiled contentedly. It was a step forward in his lover’s recovery and he hoped that each day, it would get a little easier.
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On the Wings of Maybe