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Lost Boys	By : Turkaholic Category: 1 through F > Doctor Who Views: 3820 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who, any of its characters or trademarks. I make no money from the writing of this fanfiction

Chapter List
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Chapter Twenty
Jack followed the Doctor back out into the nothingness beyond the Tardis doors. The door clicked shut behind him. He started to feel the unease in his stomach grow once more: he’d already seen things on this journey that he’d never expected – never wanted – to see. For a moment he wondered about the Doctor’s motives – what was so desperately important that he felt he had to share something so personal; so painfully emotional? But then the Doctor turned towards him, his face set seriously, and the thought fled to the back of his head.
                “Those walks became a regular event over the next few weeks.” Said the Doctor. “At first I thought it was a chance for him to gloat; to prove a point, but after a while I began to wonder if there wasn’t more to it than that.”
                “Yeah. After what I’ve seen so far, I’d guess that too.”
                The Doctor smiled at Jack, but there was something patronising in it. “It’s more complicated than that.” He said quietly. “It always was with the Master. He wasn’t just insane; he was confused - and clever. So, so clever.” Jack felt his discomfort rise as something like pride entered the Doctor’s tone. “Sometimes I wonder what he could have been, if it hadn’t been for the madness.” The Doctor’s voice trailed off quietly. Jack watched as the Timelord’s face seemed to glaze over, and he wondered what scenarios were playing out behind those eyes.
                “Okay, so what d’you think the reasons were?”
                The Doctor blinked, bringing his mind back out of the past. The ghosts of the missed possibilities faded into the back of his mind. The pain didn’t.
                “I think…” said the Doctor carefully, slowly. His voice constricted slightly. “that whatever was left of him wanted to keep me sane.”
                There was a pause as the Doctor’s words fell on the empty air around them. Jack tried his hardest to understand, but quite simply couldn’t. The confusion must have showed on his face, as the Doctor suddenly smiled sadly. “I told you it was complicated.”
                “I’m never gonna get my head around this.” Jack sighed desperately. “One minute he’s trying to break you, the next minute he’s saving you.”
                “To be honest, I’m not sure even the Master could understand his motives. He was… unstable – more unstable than I’d ever seen him before.” The Doctor slid his hands into his coat pockets and turned his back. He frowned deeply, studying the emptiness as though it were full of images – memories or ideas. “Looking back, maybe it was just the drumming in his head.” He let out a forceful sigh. “But hope’s a fickle thing. And despite every ounce of logic, every tiny particle of reason in my head, I can’t help but hope it was something else.
                “…Anyway,” The change in the Doctor’s tone made the captain jump. He watched the Timelord stand up straight, “lots more to see, and not much time. Let’s move on.”
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Lost Boys