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SHATTERED WORLD	By : Mystic75 Category: Supernatural > AU - Alternate Universe Views: 872 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Supernatural or any of the characters from the show. I am not making money from this work. WARING! CONTAINS GRAPHIC DEPICTIONS OF RAPE AND VIOLENCE!

Chapter List
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Sam called Cas and had him put {Y/N} to bed. He wanted to check on his brother. Dean was still unconscious and Cas couldn't say when he might wake up. They would just have to wait. You would think that after all those days spent on his back in that hospital, doing nothing BUT waiting, he would be used to it. But Sam could hardly stand it.
Bobby was having a hard time as well. Luckily, he only had a busted lip. No broken nose or teeth. A bloody lip was not the reason he was in a bad mood. Bobby was pissed at himself for giving Dean an opening to escape. He should have been watching Dean more closely and he NEVER should have turned his back on him. He would be questioning his decisions for a long time to come.
Crowley hadn't been seen since Dean had escaped the circle. He, like any other demon was a coward at heart. He was supposed to be keeping watch over {Y/N}, but had abandoned her at the first sign of trouble. Typical.
{Y/N} slept for nearly 18 hours straight. When she woke, she saw Sam sitting up on the bed next to her, leaning up on the headboard. He had his chin on his chest, snoring softly. She sat up and the squeaking bed springs woke him up with a start. Sam had his fists out in front of him as he looked around the room searching for the danger he was certain was there. The site made {Y/N} snort before she could stop herself. Then the realization hit him that he had fallen asleep on the job.
"Sorry {Y/N/N}. I must have dozed off", Sam said sleepily as he rubbed his eyes with the back of his bandaged hand. "How're you feeling? You slept like the dead." He looked away as he thought about what he had just said and looked back at her apologetically. "I'm so sorry, {Y/N}. I didn't mean..." {Y/N} put her hand up, cutting him off.
"Please Sam, don't be sorry", {Y/N} whispered. "This has been hard on all of us. Please don't tiptoe around me. I don't think I could handle that. She looked down at her hands in her lap and let out a shuddering breath. She spoke without looking up. "Ya know? Dean told me why he turned into a demon". Sam looked at her in shock. "He said he did it for me!", {Y/N}'s voice broke on the last word. Sam put his hand on her shoulder. He hated to see her in pain.
"We don't have to talk about this right...", Sam soothed. {Y/N} cut him off again. Her face became serious as she stared up at him.
"No, I think we do", {Y/N} said. " Because you have to understand why Dean chose to do this to himself". Sam nodded and she continued. "He told me that Abbadon was coming after me, to turn me against you and Dean. She wanted revenge. She thought that I was the best way to get it".
"She was right", Sam interjected. "That's the main reason we don't have make connections with the outside world. It creates too many targets".
{Y/N} nodded then continued. "Dean said that the only way to kill her was to stab her with something called the First Blade and to use it, he had to get that mark that he had on his arm". She looked down at her hands again for a long moment before she continued. "He said that the mark made him crave killing and that some angel killed him to stop it. But the mark brought him back as that demon."
"Did Dean tell you how he found out all of this?" Dean asked. {Y/N} just shook her head tears welling up in her eyes. "It's OK, {Y/N/N}. I'm glad you told me".
"He was trying to protect me Sam!", she sobbed. "Why does everything get so screwed up around me? Am I cursed or something?" Sam threw his arm around her and hugged her tight. He felt so guilty for letting her have this connection to them to begin with. If he had just sent her away to relatives or to the state, none of this would have happened.
"Hey! Look at me {Y/N}", Sam said firmly. "None of this is your fault and you are NOT cursed. If anyone is to blame, it's me. I shouldn't have let you stay with us. It was irresponsible and reckless". I should have known better. She shook her head frantically at him.
"Sam, if it weren't for you and Dean letting me stay here, I think I would have...", she trailed off, regretting she had opened her mouth. Sam looked at her, confused. {Y/N} looked away and dean grabbed her chin gently and pulled her face back up to his.
"You think you would have what, {Y/N/N}?", Sam whispered. He held her gaze with his intense stare and she couldn't look away. "It's OK. You can tell me".
"I think I would have killed myself", She finally looked away, ashamed. "I was in a really bad place after my family was killed. Everything I knew was ripped away from me in a second and I was lost. You guys pulled me back from the edge of the cliff I was standing on". She heaved a giant sigh before she turned back to him. "You and Dean became my family. Bobby and Cas too! Even Crowley sorta became the uncle that I never wanted but can't disown!" {Y/N} said that last part with a chuckle. Sam snorted.
"Yeah, Crowley grows on ya...like a fungus", Sam replied. They both burst out laughing at the same time. It felt really good for both of them to block out the world, even if it was just for a moment. Their laughter faded and there was an uncomfortable silence hanging over their heads.
"I want to see him, Sam", {Y/N} blurted. "No, I need to see him". Sam cringed. He was expecting that she would ask, but was hoping she wouldn't. She was just that type of person. {Y/N} always faced problems head on. Never buried them. Sam stared at his bandaged hand for a long moment.
"Are you sure you wanna do that, {Y/N/N}?", Sam mumbled. He was begging her with his eyes to say no. But, of course, she didn't. She nodded silently. With a heavy sigh, Sam stood up and walked around the bed. He held his hand out and she took it, holding his hand all the way to Dean's room. Thankfully the broken lamp had been cleaned up. She didn't need that reminder.
"Is he alright?", She asked. Dean looked like he was asleep, but she knew that that wasn't the case. She walked closer and as she did, the anxiety grew. She knew that this Dean would never hurt her, but it looked like the "NEW & IMPROVED" Dean. The one that had hurt her so badly. The one that terrified her.
"Cas says he's OK", Sam whispered. "He says that Dean's brain has to reboot and that will take some time". The closer she got, the more fear she felt. The effort of pushing that fear away was exhausting. She was sweating and breathing hard through her nose. She was trying very hard not to burst into tears.
{Y/N} reached out and touched his face with a shaking hand. A second later, her hand reared back and she slapped Dean hard across the face. Sam flinched, but didn't move from his spot. He knew she need this. A moment later and she slapped him again. Three times in quick succession. After slap number three, she tenderly laid her hand on his cheek again. Hot tears were streaming down her face and she was panting. She spoke so softly that Sam couldn't be sure that she had spoken at all. It could have just as easily been his imagination.
"I forgive you Dean".
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SHATTERED WORLD