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What Is and What Should Never Be	By : OpenPage Category: 1 through F > 21 Jump Street Views: 1336 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own 21JS or the characters. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. All characters and events in this story are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead is coincidental.

Chapter List
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Lying in bed the following morning, Tom could hear Booker taking a shower. Glancing at the clock, he saw that it was still early. Closing his eyes, he thought about the day ahead of him and he wondered if he should say something to Booker. He felt stupid bringing it up, it was only another day and yet he desperately wanted to share it with his lover. He was beginning to feel that now might finally be the right time and he wanted to do it before he lost his nerve. Hearing the faucets turn off, he waited patiently for Dennis to enter the bedroom. Enthralled, he watched his lover dress. Booker’s body had transformed dramatically after only a short time. His upper body was well toned and muscular from all the hard, physical work he endured day after day. Tom eyed him up and down, waiting for his lover to become aware of his appreciative stare. When Booker finally turned around, he grinned when he saw Tom’s expression. “Pervert,” he laughed, “I wasn’t aware I was the floor show.”
“Come here,” Tom instructed sleepily, as he held out his arms, “I wanna have some fun.”
Booker shook his head, “Sorry Tommy, not this morning. I’ve got loads to do and Henry’s expecting me.”
“Henry won’t care if you’re late,” Tom murmured, “C’mon, I know you wanna.”
“I said I can’t,” Dennis snapped irritably as he pulled on his boots. “One of us has responsibilities.”
Tom glared back angrily. “Meaning I don’t? I’ve got school and—“
“Like that’s so fucking hard,” Booker interrupted abruptly. “I’m tired and I’m sore and I’ve got to spend the day outside fixing a fence Tom. I think that’s a little more demanding than sitting in a heated classroom don’t you?”
Tears filled Tom’s eyes. “Why are you being so mean? I only wanted to make you happy. There’s something I want to tell you, can’t you wait—“
“Jesus Tommy, I said no okay? We can talk tonight, I’ve got to go,” Booker replied hurriedly and picking up his jacket, he left the room.
Tears slowly spilled from Tom’s eyes as the front door opened and slammed shut. He pulled Booker’s pillow into his arms and hugged it close, gaining comfort from the softness of the inanimate object. He had wanted today to be special and all he had managed to do was make Booker angry. Closing his eyes, he sobbed silently until he eventually fell asleep.
**
Augustine Jones noticed Tom’s sullen mood and considered taking the boy on one side to try to find out what was bothering him. During class, he monitored the young teen closely but quickly concluded that there was no cause for alarm, it appeared that Tom was just having a bad day. He wondered if Tom felt nervous about his first tutoring lesson, which Becca had scheduled for after school that day. Jones was well aware that it had taken time for his newest student to feel comfortable with his peers and a one on one lesson might be a daunting prospect for a boy who appeared to have spent much of his life without friends. Augustine’s curiosity about Tom had peaked early and he had asked the principal about Tom’s home life. But Cowan had mysteriously remained tight lipped, citing only that Tom and Dennis had endured a difficult life but were now settled with the Hendersons. Jones was certain that the principal was keeping something from him but he did not feel in a position to challenge his superior. Not that it mattered. Jones’ directive had always been to give all his students the best support he could offer, regardless of their behavior or background.
When the final bell sounded, Augustine called Tom over to his desk. “Are you looking forward to Rebecca tutoring you Tom?” he asked conversationally, attempting to gauge Tom’s level of nerves so he could offer the appropriate amount of reassurance.
Tom shrugged noncommittally. “I guess,” he replied.
Jones smiled with encouragement. “You’ll do great. Rebecca’s a wonderful student and she has the gift of being able to relay information in easy to understand terms. She’s very patient, so ask questions if you have trouble comprehending something. Okay?”
Tom nodded and gave his teacher a lopsided smile. “No probs Mr. Jones, I’ll do my best.”
“Good boy,” Jones replied, “I look forward to hearing about it tomorrow.”
Picking up his bag, Tom left the classroom and walked out into the cold afternoon air. He saw Becca sitting at a table in the sheltered outdoor lunch area. He smiled to himself as he wandered over to join her.
“Hey Tommy!” Becca greeted in a friendly tone. “Do you want to stay outside or is it too cold?”
“It’s fine,” Tom answered as he threw his bag on the table and sat down. “Unless it’s too cold for you.”
Becca pulled out her books. “Nah, I like the cold, it helps to clear the mind.”
Sitting next to Tom, Becca moved in close. “If it gets too cold we can keep each other warm,” she teased, laughing lightly as Tom’s face flushed pink. “So Tommy, I’m going to teach you everything a fifteen year old needs to know about math.”
Turning to look at his friend, Tom replied quietly, “Sixteen year old. Today’s my birthday.”
Becca’s eyes sparkled. “Wow, sweet sixteen! Happy birthday Tommy,” she exclaimed excitedly and before Tom knew what was happening, she leaned forward and kissed him.
For a fraction of a moment, Tom responded to the kiss before quickly pulling away and averting his eyes. Becca gave him a scrutinizing look as she tried to figure out Tom’s reluctance. “Did I do something wrong?” she asked quietly. “I thought you liked me.”
Tom rubbed his face with his palms before giving his friend a half smile. “I do like you,” he mumbled, “It’s just… Becca, I have a—“
“Girlfriend?” Becca asked in confusion. “Because I thought you said you didn’t have one.”
“I don’t,” Tom replied before taking a deep breath. “Becca, I have a boyfriend.”
Rebecca’s eyes opened wide with surprise. “Oh my God! Really? I knew you were too pretty!” Seeing Tom’s worried expression she laughed loudly. “Well, that sucks for me I guess, but don’t worry Tommy, I don’t care whether you’re gay or straight, I like you. And your secret’s safe with me, okay?”
“You really don’t care?” Tom asked shyly, before adding, “And I really like you too, you know, as a friend.”
“Well you kinda ruined my plans for the big dance but hey, I’m sure I’ll find someone to go with,” Becca replied good-naturedly. “Or maybe we could still go together, just as friends. Anyway, now there are no pent up sexual feelings, I can devote my time teaching you the wonderful magic of mathematics.”
Tom smiled gratefully. “Thanks Becca, I’m really glad I met you.”
“I’m glad I met you too Tommy,” Rebecca replied softly, “Now stop procrastinating and let’s get started.”
As Rebecca started to explain an algebra equation in their workbook, Tom’s mind started to wander. For the second time in two days, he had openly admitted that he was in love with another male. Now that it was out in the open, he felt liberated and he knew that he would be able to take the next step and show Booker how much he loved him.
**
Arriving home, Tom was delighted to see Booker sitting at the table. Hanging up his jacket, he rushed across the room. “I’m so glad you’re home early, I’ve got something to tell you,” he spluttered excitedly.
Booker lifted his head from his hands and gave Tom a cold stare. “Is that right?” he asked frostily. “I don’t suppose it has anything to do with you cheating on me does it?”
Tom stopped dead in his tracks. “What?” he asked in confusion. “I don’t know what you’re—“
“Don’t fucking lie to me you little bastard!” Dennis screamed, standing up so abruptly that he toppled over his chair. “I fucking saw you kissing that girl so don’t even try and deny it.”
Staring at Booker in shock, Tom’s mood suddenly turned angry. “You were spying on me? What gives you the fucking right to sneak around behind my back, watching what I’m doing?”
“So you don’t deny it then?” Dennis spat back angrily. “And I wasn’t spying on you! I came to the school so I could walk you home ‘cause I felt bad about this morning. God Tommy, I fucking hate you for this. The minute some pretty girl throws herself at you, you can’t wait to see what it’s like on the other side. How could you do this to me? After everything I’ve done, I can’t believe you would betray me.”
“I haven’t done anything!” Tom cried out in anguish. “I didn’t kiss her, she kissed me! How can you not trust me enough to know that I would never cheat on you!”
“So what? She just decided to kiss you right there when you were studying?” Booker asked disbelievingly as he paced around the room in agitation. “Come on Tom, at least give me a convincing lie.”
Tears of anger glinted in Tom’s eyes and unable to control his emotions, he turned and violently swiped several knickknacks from the shelf beside him. “Today’s my fucking birthday you asshole!” he screamed, “I told Becca I was sixteen and before I knew what was happening, she was kissing me. I pulled away, she asked why and I told her. I fucking told her! And now the whole fucking school’s gonna know I’m gay and you hate me and all I wanted this morning was to tell you… to tell you… oh FUCK!”
Tom buried his face in his hands and sobbed uncontrollably. He felt Booker’s strong arms pulling him into a tight embrace and he did not fight it. Gentle hands stroked at his hair as Dennis whispered in his ear. “Oh Tommy, I’m sorry. Shh baby please, please forgive me. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
Slowly, Tom’s hiccuping sobs abated and he gently pulled away from Booker’s hold. Swiping his sleeve across his teary eyes, he stared at Booker somberly. “You really thought I would do that to you?”
“I dunno,” Booker replied quietly. “Maybe I did.”
Tom turned away, his eyes dead. “You don’t know me at all,” he whispered as he opened the door and walked out.
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What Is and What Should Never Be