Lost Boys | By : Turkaholic Category: 1 through F > Doctor Who Views: 3820 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who, any of its characters or trademarks. I make no money from the writing of this fanfiction |
Note: I'm really really sorry for how short this is, but I had it written and wanted to get it up before I have to take a break (uni deadlines loom. Ugh.)
As way of an apology for this, the next chapter includes handcuffs.
Chapter 24
"…Japan?"
Jack's heart sank. He'd never seen it, of course: being chained to a wall, far below the deck of the Valiant, but he'd been told. A shiver went up his spine as the Doctor pulled his eyes away from the scene, heavily lidded with sadness. Jack felt as though he was going to be sick. "I don't wanna watch this!"
The Doctor frowned, as though something bitter was on the tip of his tongue. "You think I do?" He breathed. Jack realised his chest was heaving in emotion. "You think I enjoyed this? You think I want to revisit memories like this? My whole planet burned, Jack." He snapped, his eyes full of anger. Jack hesitated. "But this is the only way I can make you understand."
Jack frowned in confusion. "I thought this was about you and the Master!"
"It is! Don't you understand?" The Doctor sighed through his gritted teeth, the anger fading slowly from his eyes. "I can't just show you the parts I want to remember. I wish I could... but everything we're watching has to be shown. Telling half the story would serve no purpose."
Jack swallowed back the thousands of questions that filled his head as the Doctor lowered his eyes to the floor.
"So… there is a purpose?"
"Oh yes." Muttered the Timelord, distractedly.
"...Are you ever gonna tell me?"
There was a long silence. The Doctor avoided Jack's eyes pointedly, resting his back against the wall of the Valiant, his arms crossed defensively. Jack sighed in frustration. "Fine. Take me back."
The Doctor raised his eyes, looking into Jack's uncertainly.
"Take me back! You've obviously decided I'm not worth sharing information with, so maybe you'd prefer to take this little trip alone."
The Doctor hesitated, pressing his tongue into the back of his teeth anxiously. "...I can't tell you." He whispered.
"How many times have I followed you into danger? No questions; so second-guesses. I just did what you asked, and that was fine! Because I trusted you; because I knew that whatever happened, it was for a reason." Jack was shouting now, the pent-up frustration and anger spilling from his mouth. He wasn't even sure why he was shouting; who his anger was really meant for. "And the one time - the one time I ask for a reason - you shut me down."
The Doctor shifted uncomfortably and shook his head. "I can't tell you until it's time!" He snapped. "There are things that I can't tell you - no matter how much easier it would make this." He muttered, almost to himself. He looked into Jack's face, his brow knotted. "You're free to leave. I won't stop you; but if you do, I'm... stuck."
The final word came out in staccato; echoing through the air with no more weight than a click of the fingers. Despite this, it lingered in Jack's head. Something was off; it had been off since he'd first set eyes on the Doctor, that night in the bar.
"...You could always ask someone else."
"Like who?" Mused the Timelord; a bitter smile tugging at his lips. "Besides," he sighed, "It's too late for that."
There was a pause. The scene around them was frozen; the figures on the bridge suspended in place. Jack hadn't even realised that the Doctor had stopped the memory, he'd been too angry. Eventually Jack slid a hand through his hair, the anger and frustration subsiding as he looked at the pain in the Doctor's face.
"So you'll tell me? Eventually?"
The Timelord seemed to sense the change. His eyes lidded tiredly. "I can't force you to watch this."
Jack's lips twitched weakly. "I'd be lying through my teeth if I said I wanted to."
The Doctor's frown grew deeper.
"-but… I know you wouldn't ask if it wasn't important."
The Timelord watched him for a moment, considering the other man's face carefully. He smiled weakly; gratefully and stretched out his long, pale fingers towards him in silence.
Jack slowly slid his fingers into the Doctor's in way of a silent apology. They felt cold, but still something about them made Jack feel calmer. The scene jumped back into life, and the captain felt his stomach churn at what he was about to witness.
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