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Retribution	By : ambrosiarush Category: M through R > NCIS: Los Angeles Views: 13279 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS:LA or any of it's characters. I do NOT make any money from writing this story.

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Deeks stood in front of his bookshelf that was home to some law books, a few novels mostly horror or crime fiction, and some of his DC and Marvel comic collection. Along with the books there were a few picture frames, he ignored all the others and immediately went for the one in the solid wood frame. He picked up the picture and held it in both hands. It had been taken by one of the yearbook crew outside of the high school he’d gone to near the end of his senior year.

He smiled a little as he looked at it, unable to believe he had actually cut his hair that short, he’d hated it till it had grown back out. Jax had his hair longer, not getting a sensible hair cut until his mid-twenties after a few years in university, ripped jeans and a leather jacket that was a far cry from the business suit wearing man he was today. Delaney was taller than Ray, she’d awkwardly hit her growth spurt in middle school and it wasn’t until highschool that any of her male friends started playing catch up. She stood with Ray who had his arm around her shoulder and she was smirking at him. Deeks’s blue eyes went to the final person in the photograph. Taller than Ray but shorter than himself, unkept brown hair that defied styling, deep green eyes and a roguish smile, Evan.

He felt her hand on the middle of his back. “What was he like?” Kensi asked.

Deeks shrugged, unable to find words not with the emotions lodged in his throat. They’d been friends, the five of them a group that despite going their separate ways after high school, had done their best to keep in touch. He hadn’t seen him in years, but it didn’t stop the ache, the weight on his chest.

Sensing his inability to find the words she leaned in to him, resting her head on his arm as she gazed down at the highschool photograph. “It’ll get easier,” she whispered.

“I know,” he replied looking down at her as she looked up, she offered a sad smile and he just sighed putting the picture back on the book shelf.

“Lunch is ready,” Nell said walking into the middle of the room.

“Okay,” Kensi said her hand running down his arm stopping at his wrist, her thumb running over his skin. “Come on, you have to eat something.”

“I’m not hungry,” Deeks whispered.

“We know,” Nell said softly. “Just... try to have a little bit, okay. I’d rather you don’t get sick.”

He sighed seeing the worry and compassion in Nell’s eyes. How could he say no? Especially after she, likely alone, had gone through the trouble of cooking a meal for them all. “Alright,” he muttered following her into the kitchen, Kensi a step behind. The kitchen table had been extended, the wood plank that fit in the centre had been located from the pantry and set in place, a table cloth he hadn’t even known he owned was laid out over it. The table was set with plates, glasses, fork and knives. “You didn’t have to go through all this trouble,” he said a little surprised.

“Oh no trouble,” Nell insisted as moved efficiently around the kitchen. “I come from a pretty big family, this is nothing. G, can you get the salad?”

“Got it,” he said grabbing the fresh caesar salad from the counter and bringing it over to the table, while Eric brought over bruschetta bread and Sam brought over mini croissant dogs. Deeks watched with a little bit of amusement as Nell seemed to give the men in the kitchen their marching orders and they worked harmoniously as if they’d all done it before... maybe they’d all just gotten really good at listening to women, he fought the urge to make a ‘whipped’ noise.

Nell poured some kind of pasta into a large bowl and made her way through the crowded kitchen to set it at the centre of the table. Deeks wasn’t sure what it was specifically, but it smelt delicious. A noodle dish that had grilled chicken, green peas, carrots, broccoli and what appeared to be mixed in with salsa. She’d come up with a pretty good meal plan for what he had in the fridge and pantry.

“You didn’t have any cilantro,” Nell said in a borderline worried tone. “I hope it’s okay.”

“Hey,” he put an arm around her, it was obvious she was trying to present some kind of comfort, and the home cooked meal was a nice gesture that he appreciated. “Thanks.”

She offered him a sad smile and gave him a little push toward the table. “Eat something.”

Everyone sat down, and there was more than enough food for everyone. Bowls were passed around, plates were filled and no one really knew where to bring the conversation so they all ate in peace.

Deeks ate, mostly because Nell and Kensi kept shooting worried looks his way. “This is really good Nell,” he said breaking the silence, and there were nods and ‘mmhmm’s of agreement from everyone else at the table. She smiled just a little before spearing another noodle with her fork.

Other than the occasional request for something to be passed it was quiet until plates were cleared. Everyone started clearing the table, Kensi helped Nell to put leftovers in plastic containers. Deeks was rather surprised that without being asked Callen was elbows deep in suds washing plates. It was strange that the mysterious Special Agent-in-Charge would be in his kitchen doing dishes, it was so out of place, so odd that it humanized the legend into more of a man. Eric was drying dishes and Sam was putting them back away and must have been who had set the table since it seemed he already knew where everything went.

The doorbell rang and Deeks got up. “Want me to get it?” Kensi asked wanting to do anything to help her partner through the difficult time of losing a loved one.

“I’ve got it,” Deeks replied walking out of the kitchen through his living room to the entrance way where shoes were all kicked off on the mat, a couple of pegs on the wall for jackets, the dogs leash and smaller ones for keys despite the fact that he rarely remembered to hang them there. He opened the door to find Nate standing there. He was surprised, it was quite a while since they’d seen Nate. “Nice beard,” he commented a little shocked having never seen the rather baby faced psychologist with a full grown man-beard. That and the man was wearing a pair of distressed jeans with holes and a t-shirt, he’d never seen Nate dressed so casually.

Nate chuckled and rubbed the beard. “Yeah, haven’t had a chance to shave since I got state-side...” his eyes dimmed the moment of humour gone. “Hetty told me what happened,” he said his tone calm and supportive Deeks wondered if it was something they taught in ‘shrink’ school, or if it was just a natural, born-with kind of talent the tall man had. “My condolences.”

Deeks nodded his head and pointed to the box in Nate’s hand. “What’s that?”

“Cookies,” Nate responded looking down at them with a bit of a sheepish grin. “Hetty was already having a fit about my wardrobe, and the beard,” he looked back up and gave a shrug. Deeks found himself smiling a bit, the thought of Hetty giving Nate a look over, in his mind she’d be tutting, shaking her head and finger wagging all at once.

“Go figure,” Deeks said and stepped back. “Come on in, the gangs is now all here.”

Passing Deeks the cookies, Nate took off his shoes and then followed the detective into the kitchen. The two men stood in opposite sides of the doorway watching the way the team worked together in the kitchen. “Perhaps I should suggest to Hetty a cooking team buildi-“ Nate’s words were cut off with gasps of surprise and a few callings of ‘Nate!’

“When did you get back?” Kensi asked coming over to give him a tight hug which he returned.

“Um,” Nate checked the thick watch on his wrist. “Two hours ago.”

She let him go and studied him critically, no worse for wear except... “That beard has to go.”

Nate smiled and nodded. “So I’ve heard.” Nate embraced the warm welcome from his friends and felt only now as though he’d finally come home, despite being in LA for two hours and having made a pit stop at his apartment. The news he’d gotten when he’d come to the office for debrief wasn’t something he’d expected and not only as a psychologist but as a friend wanted to come and offer support. Hetty sent him with cookies as if it could make up for his wardrobe and the beard.

“You going to shrink me?” Deeks asked eyeing the good doctor wearily.

“No,” Nate replied. “If you want to talk about it, as always I’m all ears, but no, I’m not here to ‘shrink’ you. I’m not even currently on active duty.” Nate rotated off business for NCIS in Dubai, he had to do an official debrief sometime in the very near future, plus a heap of paperwork to catch up on before he’d be put back to work.

Dishes were finished, put away. Leftovers were labelled with masking tape and markers along with dates and Deeks almost smiled at it. It was such a beautiful day, and he should be working, or if it was a legitimate day off he’d go surfing seeing as how the swells were just perfect, or find a beach volleyball game to join, or go running, or simply just be outdoors. The sun seemed to mock him from the cloudless sky as he stared out the window. He figured it should be raining, maybe a thunderstorm would suit the mood better.

“Do you want to go to the beach?” Kensi asked him knowing how calming he found the ocean to be.

He knew he couldn’t go though, not with everyone there. “Well, look at the time,” Nate said making a show of looking at his watch. He then looked directly at Callen as if he could telepathically make the man get the message.

Callen rolled his eyes a little bit as if to say ‘I’m not stupid.’ “We should give you some time,” Callen said looking at the detective. “You good?”

Deeks nodded. “Yeah, and I appreciate you all coming over. You didn’t have to.”

“You’re a part of this team Deeks,” Sam said and then because he hadn’t said it to the detective before, and knew the man needed to hear it he continued. “You’re a part of this family.”

The sentiment could have broken him. Family. That deep longing he’d had for years. Finally, a place to call home, a place with brothers and a little sister, and then... Kensi she was his best friend, but his feelings for her were anything but brotherly. “Thanks Sam,” he said quietly hoping that his voice didn’t fail him. He walked the group to the door, there were those manly quick hugs that were just one pat on the back and then gone. Nell was most comforting, probably because she was a woman who was comfortable with her feelings and she gave him a good solid ‘I’m here for you’ kind of hug. She looked up at him her hazel eyes filled with compassion. “If you need anything,” she stressed.

“I know, and... thanks,” Deeks said. She gave a little nod and finally stepped away, taking Callen’s hand as they headed out the door, Sam, Eric right behind them.

Nate stood there for a second longer before pulling out a card. “I got a new phone,” he said. “Can’t legally tell you what happened to the last one, but I assure you it died a spectacular death.” Deeks couldn’t help but grin and took the card with Nate’s new number. “Just so you have it... incase you need it.”

“Yeah,” Deeks said with a nod. “Thanks Doc.”

Nate gave a nod and a wave to Kensi who was staying before he headed out the door and to the car he’d signed out from the NCIS garage.

Deeks shut the door and sighed heavily. “How does a surf sound?” Kensi asked wanting to see her partner get a little peace from the day.

He shook his head and forced himself to stand up straight. “I’m going to be having house guests, I got to make up the spare room, the couch, and...” he blew out a breath realizing he didn’t have third place for someone to sleep. “Well I guess I’ll make the twins share the guest bed.”

“I can make the bed,” Kensi offered heading to the guest room Deeks’s hand’s stopped her as they gripped her hips. “Deeks?” she said when he said nothing, he just kept them still.

“I can do it,” he said quietly before he walked around her. She followed him and they ended up making he double bed together in silence. Kensi grabbed a sheet, a few blankets and a pillow with a fresh case from the closet taking it back to the living room and she made the couch up. “You don’t have to do this Kensi,” Deeks said. He wasn’t use to people standing by him through the tough things, like Kensi when he made the calls. Wasn’t use to loved ones making a meal just so he’d have to eat. Wasn’t use to the persistence of Kensi’s never give up attitude turned on him as she strived to do everything to make his day easier. He wasn’t use to it, wasn’t sure what to say or do about it, but he was grateful for what she was doing.

“I know,” Kensi said. “You’d do it for me.”

“I would,” he agreed. He sat down in the chair and Kensi fussed around fluffing the pillow. “I should go and see Evan’s parents.”

Kensi froze in her fluffing and then slowly put down the pillow. She turned to him knowing there was something off in her partners voice. His elbows were resting on his knees, his head bowed, his unruly hair hiding his face. Sensing perhaps more than knowing, she walked in front of him and dropped to her knees before him her a hand going to each side of his face lifting his face slightly and it tried to jerk his head away but she held tight seeing the tears in his blue eyes. “Oh Marty,” she whispered as a tear fell. He grabbed both of her wrists and tried to pull them away as he stood but she stood with him and wrapped her arms around his neck “It’s okay,” she whispered kissing a tear that had fallen. “I’ve got you,” she said and his arms tightened around her waist pulling her closer and she felt the tremors in his body as he finally gave way to the tidal wave of grief that pulled him under and threatened to drown him. She held onto him, unwilling to let him drown in such a way, she’d let him grieve, and then she’d pull him from the depths. She was determined to get her partner through his loss.

He didn’t worry about crushing her like he would another woman, Kensi wasn’t fragile. He held her tightly and she held him back. Despite the attempt to keep the grief at bay once alone he found he had little to no strength left to fight it.

Kensi found she had a tear sliding down her face, her partner’s grief becoming her own. His loss was hers and they were one as they held on to one another. He was breaking her heart with his sobs, with the tears that wet her sweater, with the grip he had on her as if he would die if he let her go. “I’m here,” she whispered the only words she could find. “I’m here.”

::

Deeks brought flowers with him as he went to the house that Evan had grown up in. Marianne and Steven, his parents, still lived there. Kensi stood at his side her fingers brushing against his and he took her hand, she squeezed it in a reassuring manner, not the ‘I’m going to break your fingers’ kind of way he had almost expected. “You ready?” she asked him.

He let out a shaky breath. “Yeah,” he decided there was no walking away from it. He had to go in, give his condolences to the family, find out what the funeral plans were. Taking in a deep breath he looked to his partner, as if sensing his gaze she turned to him her brown eyes inquisitive. “Thank you for coming with me Kens,” he hadn’t meant to, but his words hadn’t come out anymore than a whisper.

She nodded and took the first step for him and soon enough they were walking in synchronization up the pathway to the front door.

::

He had kept back from the silver SRX, and pulled over to park when she had. He watched as they crossed the street and stood staring at the house. The death of Evan Ellis had not been part of his plan but he took it as a sign from the universe to push the time line up and put his plan into action. It was like the heavens had opened up and were siding with him, it was like the angels were whispering in his ear, ‘yes, he must suffer.’

Despite the fact that he had not played a hand in the death of Evan Ellis, it brought him glee. He was practically quaking with excitement, the death of the friend was leaving Deeks shaky and he only wished that he could have seen his face when he’d gotten the news, the devastation that would have swept through the detective that had ruined his life.

He watched as Kensi’s hand brushed against Deeks’s. They looked to each other and he knew that the grand finale in destroying Deeks would be taking the woman he loved most. With a smile upon his face he put his car into gear, after all, there was still plenty of work to be done before Martin Deeks would be all alone with nothing but ghosts and memories, just like he was.

Hell, maybe he could even get the detective to pull the trigger on himself. The thought put a near joyous smile on his face as he drove by.

::

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Retribution