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Hunting Humanity IV	By : greenwizard11 Category: Supernatural > Slash - Male/Male Views: 1064 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Supernatural universe. No money is being made from this story.

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Sam sat at the dinner table just staring at the food on the plate. “What’s wrong with you?” Dean asked. “You’re turning into Liam with the food thing again lately.”

Sam sighed and shook his head. “I just… I really get how he felt when he was laid up, except I don’t even have the same excuse.”

Liam patted his shoulder. “I was a little out of it and not in my right mind then. Well, when am I ever in my right mind, but you get what I mean.”

Sam swallowed hard. “I’m a complete and total freeloader. The best thing you can say about me the last three weeks is I’m free child care, though I did father the baby and should be doing more than changing diapers.”

Liam grabbed Sam by the arm and dragged him to the sitting room. “We’re out of ear shot, now talk.”

Sam looked at him like he was crazy. “What are you…?”

“When I was going through shit talking to that shrink actually did me a world of good. I understand why you can’t talk to your brother or Natalie, but I am neither, so pretend I’m therapist.”

“Liam, I can’t do that.”

“You’ve got to do something. You’re in a tailspin like I was, plain as day, and no, you can’t get yourself out of it.”

“Look, maybe I don’t deserve to be pulled out of it. Maybe I really do deserve to be tossed out on my ass to freeze and starve to death. How can I put it more plainly than I started the apocalypse! Everything bad on the news, all those people, my fault, don’t you get it! And even after all that, there are still moments I crave the very thing that got me into the mess in the first place.”

“That is a lot to be put on one person’s shoulders, I agree, but is it really all on your shoulders?”

“Yeah, it is.”

“So, you made this angel friend talk you into exploring your dark side?”

“No, but it wasn’t hard for him to talk me into it. Hell, he even said we could stop if I wanted to. I didn’t want to. All he did was open doors, and I walked through them.”

“And I suppose you made the angels twist and toy with things?”

“No, but again, nobody held a gun to my head. I did exactly what they wanted me to do. I’m a fucking worthless idiot freak that doesn’t deserve to live anymore.”

“If you’re a freak, what the hell am I?”

“You kill demons and heal people. Those are good things, things that you were meant to do.”

“All you did was kill demons. Killing Lilith, you didn’t know until it was too late, your intentions were good.”

Sam snorted. “My intentions. Yeah, and all I had to do was suck angel blood. I’m sure you haven’t forgotten me attacking you for blood for a hit of what makes you tick. And hell, the night I killed Lilith, you don’t remember, but that scar on your neck is my teeth marks from going after you like a damn vampire. I was so desperate for your power I ripped into your neck with my teeth. I was a parasite, taking power from you and our angel friend. And the thing is, I liked it. I liked the power. It made me feel special.”

Liam sighed and ran his fingers over the scar on his neck. “You’re right, until now I didn’t know where that wound came from. But, the past is the past.” Liam’s eyes flashed red. “Power is a lot like money you know. Very useful, and in some situations necessary. However, it does not keep you warm at night. You felt the giant sucking aching hole that is my heart, but you envy what I have?” Astiratu chuckled. “It’s a case of the grass is always greener, cupcake. Do you know what I would give to be normal, at least for a little while? Who had to kill War? Um, me, because I’m the only one who can. Every single mother fucking time the world starts sliding down the shit hole, who does heaven turn to? Me. Who can’t have a quiet and peaceful life? Me. Who can never be truly loved because they look like some walking nightmare? Oh, that’s me again.”

“But nobody screws with you. War tried to run from you. You are respected. You are feared.”

“What the angels did, manipulating us both, I don’t consider that respect. Were you present for the conversation where Zachariah called me a whore a few times? I am not respected, I am taken for granted. They break it and I fix it, and nobody gives a damn what fixing things costs me personally. Hell, you really want it so bad...” A knife appeared in his hand and he cut himself on the forearm. “Take it. Take it all for all I fucking care.”

“No...” Sam shook his head and took a step back. “I can’t. I won’t.” Sam stared hyperventilating and shaking a little. He took another step back.

Astiratu smirked. “Hey, he can learn! So, quit beating yourself up and go eat your dinner. Think of it as you being kept alive until you get your head on straight again and can go out there and save more lives. And really, did you have a damn thing to do with Azazel twisting your soul when you were six months old?”

“No,” Sam shook his head. “That I had nothing to do with. But if it’s all the same to you, I’m just gonna go to bed.”

Astiratu sighed and shrugged and turned back into Liam again. He went to the bathroom to bandage his arm and returned to the dinner table. “Babe, what happened to your arm?” Dean asked, looking a little suspicious.

Liam shrugged. “That’s a little fuzzy. I wanna say an experiment that yielded positive results. Anyway, Sam went to bed.”

In the morning Sam got up and just got himself a glass of water. “Good start, how about some cereal or something to go with it?” Dean patted his shoulder. “You’ve gotta be hungry by now.”

Sam shook his head. “I don’t want to be a parasite anymore. I’ll just have to deal with being hungry I guess.”

Dean shook his head. “Sam, this is really stupid. Eat something. Natalie needs you, and I’m sure she’s just as worried.”

“I’ve come up with a solution,” Sam indicated the paper in front of him. “I’m going to get a job.”

“Dude, whatever makes you feel better, but you’ve gotta eat for the strength to work.”

“I will when I start getting paid.”

“You can’t...” Dean sighed and took a moment to gather his thoughts. Then the doorbell rang. “Hold that thought,” Dean said as he went to go see who it was. Liam was standing at the door with Castiel. “Cas, how’d you find us?”

“Bobby told me where you were,” Castiel answered as he stepped inside and looked around. “Very nice place.”

“Um, thanks, what do you want?”

“I’ve been looking for God. He’s the answer to ending this apocalypse.”

Dean sighed. “That’s just super. Find Him?”

“No, not yet. I’m here because I need your help. I have it on good authority that Raphael is walking the earth. I need to find him for information.”

Astiratu snorted. “Not even I’m that crazy or stupid.”

Dean snorted. “If that crazy bitch says it’s too crazy for him, give me one good reason why I should do this.”

“Because you're Michael's vessel and no angel will dare harm you.”

“Oh, yeah, right, that shit again. Sorry.”

“I need your help because you are the only ones who'll help me. Please. I rebelled for friends, both old and new. You two.”

Astiratu sighed. “You know, I’m running on my last little bit of give a fuck. But sure, why not use it on you.”

“Alright, fine. Where is he?” Dean gave in as well.

“Maine. Let's go,” Castiel moved to put his fingers to Dean’s forehead, but Dean put a hand up and pulled back.

“Last time you zapped me someplace I didn't poop for a week. We're driving.”

Astiratu chuckled at that as they gathered their things to go. Castiel directed them to Waterville, Maine, to the sheriff’s department. “And we're here why?” Dean asked as they got out of the car.

“A deputy sheriff laid eyes on the archangel,” Castiel answered.

“Alright, what's the plan?”

“We'll, tell the officer that he witnessed an angel of the Lord, and the officer will tell us where the angel is.”

Astiratu started laughing. “Both of you are so adorable sometimes. Um, cupcake, the average human mind is a little on the fragile and stupid side, especially these days when it comes to such matters. You can’t walk up to them and say shit like that, even if it’s the truth. Every time I wind up on earth I end up feeling like the only sane one the asylum.”

“That’s rich,” Dean snorted. “But he’s right. When humans want something really, really bad, we lie.” He pulled a fake FBI badge out of the glove compartment and stuffed it into Castiel’s pocket and straightened his tie.

“Why?” Castiel looked confused.

“Because that's how you become President,” Dean patted the angel on the shoulder and headed inside.

They found the guy and Dean approached him. “Deputy Framingham?” He pulled out his own badge. “FBI, Alonzo Mosely, these are my partners.”

Astiratu pulled out his badge as well, while Castiel just stood there. Astiratu nudged him a little and he caught on, pulling out the badge Dean gave him upside down. Astiratu reached to fix it for him. “Don’t mind him too much,” Astiratu motioned to Castiel with a smile. “He’s a trainee.”

“Mind if we ask you a few questions?” Dean asked.

“Yeah, sure. Talk here, though,” the deputy indicated his right ear as he led them into his office. “Hearing's all blown to hell.”

“That happen recently?” Astiratu asked.

“Yeah. Gas station. Why you're here, isn't it?”

“Yes, it is,” Dean nodded as they all sat down. “You mind just, uh, running us through what happened?”

“A call came in. Disturbance out at the Pump and Go on Route four. Would not have believed my eyes if I hadn't seen it myself. We're talking a riot. Full scale.”

“How many?” Dean asked.

The deputy shrugged. “Thirty, forty, in all out kill or be killed combat.”

“It's angels and demons, probably,” Castiel said.

Astiratu quickly put a hand over his mouth and chuckled. “The imagination this guy has, I swear. Sometimes I wonder about the people giving the psych evaluations.”

“Anyway,” Dean flashed a charming smile. “What happened next?”

“Freaking explosion, that's what. They said it was one of those underground gas tanks, but, uh, I don't think so. Wasn't your usual fireball. It was, um...”

“Pure white,” Castiel said when the hand was removed from his mouth.

“Yeah,” the deputy nodded. “Gas station was leveled. Everyone was...it was just horrible. And I see this one guy, kneeling, real focused like, not a damn scratch on him.”

“You know him?” Dean asked.

“Donnie Finneman. Mechanic there.”

“Do you know where he is now?” Astiratu asked.

“Saint Pete's.”

“Thank you for your time,” Astiratu smiled and they left for the hospital.

They found Donnie in the hospital sitting in a wheelchair completely catatonic. “I take it that's not Raphael anymore,” Dean commented.

“Just an empty vessel,” Castiel said.

“So, is this what I'm looking at if Michael jumps in my bones?” Dean asked.

“No, not at all,” Castiel answered. “Michael is much more powerful. It'll be far worse for you.”

Dean sighed and shook his head before they left to go an abandoned house to squat. “Exactly how are we going to trap an archangel?” Dean asked Castiel.

Castiel just looked to Astiratu. “Oh, fucking super!” Astiratu rolled his eyes.

“You can’t do it?” Dean eyed him.

“Oh, I can do it,” Astiratu assured him. “Since I am...” he motioned to his body, “encased in meat at the moment it’ll zap me into oblivion for a little while, but I can do it.”

“Can you elaborate a little on the zapping into oblivion part?”

“It’ll take every ounce of juice he’s got,” Castiel explained.

“What he said,” Astiratu sighed.

“So, what happens when you use up all your juice?” Dean wondered.

“Well,” Astiratu bit his lip. “Once I came pretty damn close to using it all to resurrect somebody. I slept for three days. Woke up not having a clue who or where I was and could only speak Aramaic, which of course nobody around me understood. I was put back to bed and slept another three days. Then, fortunately, I woke up myself again.”

“I see,” Dean nodded. “Cas, if he does this and it kills him I am so gonna kill you. If he just gets really whacked out you are helping to take care of him, understand?”

“Understood,” Castiel nodded. “Though if it kills him I am not likely to survive anyway. Raphael will break free then and kill me.”

“So, this ritual of yours, when does it got to go down?” Dean asked.

“Sunrise,” Castiel answered.

“What do we do until then? Booze, women?”

Astiratu’s eyes narrowed. “Just don’t go there.”

“I was thinking more for Cas than me. I mean, he said you two… But how long ago was that, and how many times?”

“Just the once,” Astiratu answered. “About four hundred and ninety years ago.”

“Seriously?” Dean raised an eyebrow. “You’ve been around how long and have only gotten laid once? We gotta fix that, come on you two.”

“Not a good idea,” Astiratu sighed as he followed.

Dean dragged them to a brothel. Castiel sat looking very uncomfortable. “This is a den of iniquity. I should not be here.”

“Dude, you full on rebelled against heaven. Iniquity is one of the perks,” Dean smiled and patted him on the shoulder.

One of the hookers approached them. “Hi. What's your name?”

Castiel stared at his shoes. “His name is Cas,” Dean flashed her a charming smile. “What's your name?”

“Chastity,” she answered.

Castiel started chugging his beer. “Wow. Is that kismet or what, buddy?” Dean smiled. “Well, he likes you, you like him, so...”

“Come on, baby,” Chastity beckoned him.

Dean handed Castiel some cash. “If she asks for a credit card, no. Now just stick to the basics, okay? Do not order off the menu. Go get her, tiger.” Castiel stood rooted to the spot. “Don't make me push you.”

Astiratu just shook his head. “I have first hand knowledge of his idea of pillow talk, and I’m telling you...”

Minutes later there was a scream, and they went to go investigate. “Screw you too! God! Oh! Jerk!” Chastity screamed and stormed away from Castiel.

“The hell did you do?” Dean looked at him while Astiratu busted up laughing.

“I don't know,” Castiel shrugged. “I just looked her in the eyes and told her it wasn't her fault that her father Gene ran off. It was because he hated his job at the post office.”

“Oh, no, man,” Dean shook his head. “This whole industry runs on absent fathers. It's, it's the natural order.” Two bouncers entered the hallway. “We should go. Come on,” he motioned for his companions to follow him to the door at the other end of the hall and out to an alley.

Dean chuckled a little as they got back in the car. “What?” Castiel looked at him funny.

“Nothing, it’s just… Astiratu said your idea of pillow talk was bad, but I didn’t think...” he chuckled again.

They headed back to the hospital in the morning. “Okay,” Dean sighed. “Exactly how are we going to get him here?”

“Very simple. There's, well, almost an open phone line between a vessel and his angel. One just has to know how to dial.” He leaned down and started whispering in the vessel’s ear in Aramaic. “I'm here, Raphael. Come and get me, you little bastard.”

“Just out of curiosity, what is the average customer wait time to speak to an archangel?” Dean asked.

“Be ready,” Castiel warned.

They spent a good part of the day waiting for something to happen, but nothing ever did, so they went back to the house. Raphael was waiting for them, wings of lightning coming from his back and the light bulbs shattered. “And I thought you were supposed to be impressive,” Dean crossed his arms. “All you do is black out the room.”

Astiratu snorted. “Welcome to my world.”

“It is a testament to my unending mercy that I do not smite you here and now,” Raphael glared at them. “Especially you, you filthy trouble causing whore.”

“Moi?” Astiratu chuckled. “Like you could. Now there’s a trick I’d like to see.”

“Hello, Dean,” Raphael turned his attention to him. “Now that I know where you are I can take you to Michael.”

“Well then,” Dean flashed a little smile. “Sounds terrifying. It does. But, uh, hate to tell you, I'm not going anywhere with you.”

Raphael tilted his head. “Surely you remember Zachariah trying to give you stomach cancer?”

“Yeah, that was, that was hilarious,” Dean nodded.

“Well, he doesn't have anything close to my imagination or power.”

Raphael raised a hand, but nothing happened and he looked confused. “Having a little trouble getting it up?” Astiratu smirked.

“But you… You can’t...”

“Block you? I swear, some days I think God had a short supply of brains to hand out. I actually could, though I would be sweating a little more than I am right now. Look down, idiot.”

Raphael looked down and snorted when he saw he was standing on a sigil. “You really think that little scribble is going to save you?”

Astiratu shrugged. “Not really, but it made you impotent, which in my book is pretty damn funny.”

Raphael took a step toward them and Astiratu raised his hands and a circle of lightning surrounded the archangel. “You dare?” Raphael stared him down.

Astiratu gave him a look. “You act like you’ve never met me.”

Raphael pushed himself against the circle, and Astiratu convulsed a little. “And human flesh has made you a little impotent. How long do you think you can keep this going, and what do you think will happen when you can’t?”

“We don’t really want trouble,” Castiel stepped forward. “Just to talk. Where is He?”

“God? Didn't you hear? He's dead, Castiel. Dead.”

“Then who’s been screaming at me?” Astitatu demanded.

Raphael snorted. “Someone has to keep the stupid whore on a leash in line.”

“Well, thanks for taking away my only fear,” Astiratu said as a bolt of lightning hit Raphael, making him shake a little and cry out in pain.

“You're lying,” Castiel’s eyes narrowed.

“Am I? Do you remember the twentieth century? Think the twenty first is going any better? Do you think God would have let any of that happen if He were alive?”

Dean shook his head. “Daddy ran away and disappeared. He didn't happen to work for the post office, did He?”

“This is funny to you?” Raphael glared. “You're living in a godless universe.”

“And? What, you and the other kids just decided to throw an apocalypse while He was gone?”

“We're tired. We just want it to be over. We just want paradise.”

“Yeah,” Astiratu snorted. “And I want a sandy tropical beach with and endless supply of good food, good booze, and a few dozen really hot sex slaves. We can’t always get what we want.”

Raphael pushed against the barrier again, causing Astiratu to convulse again and cry out. “Is that a human heart I hear being pushed to its limits? Your well is quickly running dry, I can tell. What are you going to do now?”

Astiratu started trembling with effort. “Castiel, take Dean and get the fuck out of here fast.”

“No,” Dean argued. “I am not just leaving him!”

“He’s saving our lives,” Castiel roughly dragged Dean out to the car. “Come on, let’s go!”

“But...” Dean just stared helplessly into the window. There was a loud explosion and bright flash of light.

Castiel sighed and tapped Dean on the forehead. Suddenly they were standing on a sunny beach. “Sorry, but you left me no choice.”

“Where the hell are we?” Dean asked, looking around.

“Hawaii.”

“We’ve gotta get back there! I love that crazy son of a bitch damn it! This is your fault!”

“Calm down,” Castiel placed a hand on Dean’s shoulder. “Astiratu is nothing if not extremely resourceful.”

“But we left him with no resources! What’s he going to do with no juice?”

“He’ll think of something. He always does.”

Astiratu found himself in his bed. He sat up and blinked. “What the hell?” he looked around confused.

“You are a hard one to find lately,” a man appeared beside him.

“Lucifer,” Astiratu growled. “What the hell do you want?”

“To bury the hatchet,” Lucifer smiled at him. “Even though it was mostly you being a big bully, I’m willing to forgive and forget if you’ll give me what I need.”

“Go back to hell,” Astiratu snorted and raised a hand, but nothing happened.

Lucifer laughed. “Astiratu my friend, do you not remember? You used all your power on Raphael. It’s gonna take you a week at least to replenish. I saved you because I need that meat suit alive. Nick here is just an improvisation. Plan B. He can barely contain me. But you… you’ve got just the ticket lying in a pile of rubble. I figured now was the best time to approach you seeing as how you can’t zap me. You’re defenseless.”

“But you still need my permission, which you’ve got to be crazier than I am if you think you ever getting it. I really don’t like you.”

“I know you don’t, but I’m really not as bad as you think. You and I, we are so much alike. We both think humans, Daddy’s pet project, were a massive waste of time.”

“Not all humans. Some are okay.”

“Tell me, Astiratu, how many in all the millennia you’ve been around them have ever taken one look at your true form and not run away screaming?”

“Three. Four if you count Natalie, but she was pretty skittish for a while.”

“I know what it feels like to be hated for the way you were made. You should be held in very high esteem, but instead you are trampled all over. Humans are stupid ungrateful bastards, and my brothers and sisters, well, they think they’re better than you when really they’re not. You are Daddy’s shining jewel.”

Astiratu rolled his eyes. “I agree, humans are stupid, but you should know I’m not. Don’t think I don’t know what you’re trying to do.”

“What am I trying to do, my friend?”

“Unlike your little creations, you don’t lie. No, you tell people the truth they want to hear. You are the most manipulative bastard in existence. Why do you think it was so much fun to pick on you?”

“Alright,” Lucifer sighed. “You know if I make a deal with you I have to follow through with it, right? Then I propose a deal, a very good one.”

Astiratu crossed his arms. “What deal could you possibly make me that I would want?”

“Peace. I’ll make you your very own paradise inside your mind, and all you have to do is enjoy yourself. Not only will I do that, but I won’t harm that little family of yours. I’ll take very good care of them. Isn’t that what you want? You worry about Dean and Sam getting hurt, don’t you? I can make them no touch too.”

“Just shut the fuck up and go away!” Astiratu growled. “The answer is a big fat go fuck yourself.”

Lucifer sighed. “Alright, I get it. You’re not ready yet. I can be patient,” Lucifer said before he disappeared.

Castiel and Dean returned to the house, which was completely leveled. “Oh, god!” Dean shouted, putting his hands on his head. “He can’t… He’s not okay. Not after this.”

Castiel looked around. “There was a battle here, but not between Raphael and Astiratu. Don’t lose faith.” Castiel started digging through the rubble. “Here!” he called out.

Dean raced over. “Please tell me he’s not...”

Castiel put his fingers on Astiratu’s neck. “He’s alive.”

“Thank fuck!” Dean let out the breath he was holding.

Castiel shook Astiratu until he opened his eyes and a few words passed between them in Aramaic. Then Astiratu went limp again. “Lucifer was here. He needs his vessel alive.”

“What?” Dean’s eyes widened. “I thought not even Lucifer could find us with those things you carved in our ribs.”

“He can’t, but drawing Raphael here and trapping him basically sent out a beacon.”

“Fucking wonderful!” Dean shouted. “Okay, let’s scoop him up and get out of here. Is he hurt at all?”

“Doesn’t look like it.”

Dean picked him up and put him in the back of the car. “Remember Cas, I told you that you were going to help care for him. I don’t speak Aramaic.”

“I will,” Castiel nodded and got into the passenger seat.

Castiel kept his promise and took care of Astiratu. They were only able to rouse the half angel for bathroom breaks and to get water into him. Otherwise he was out cold. Dean carried him into the house and up to the bedroom to tuck him in.

When Dean came down Castiel was still standing by the door. “What’s going on?” Natalie asked.

“We have a house guest until Liam remembers who he is and who we are and remembers how to speak English again. Go on, Cas, might as well make yourself comfortable until he needs another bathroom break and maybe some food. Where’s Sam? Did he find a job?”

“He did, but he’s in the hospital right now. He was working in a bar and passed out from not eating for a few days. He wouldn’t cooperate and eat in the hospital either, so they knocked him out and put a feeding tube in him. Then they had to put restraints on him so he didn’t rip it out and leave.”

“Jeez,” Dean shook his head. “Maybe I’ll visit him and try to talk some sense into him a little later.”
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Hunting Humanity IV