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Blind Chess	By : madradena Category: Star Trek > The Next Generation Views: 1334 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Disclaimer: I do not own ST:TNG, nor the characters. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Emma got to Data's quarters pretty late and deep in thought. She pressed the door chime absently and frowned irritated when she instinctively tried to walk through the door staying stubbornly shut instead of sliding open and she simultaneously heard Data's comvoice coming through.
"Who's there?"
She rolled her eyes annoyed "Who?! The devil with a trident! Time to get scared, Deadpan, if you don't let me in."
"Sorry, I'm in the middle of changing. Come in, please!"
The door slid open, and she stepped in still annoyed "This bachelorette party meeting took so long that we'll be late from your mom!" she started to unfasten her uniform top, but the fastenings seemed to get stuck "Oh, shit, just what I need..."
"We won't be late, don't worry." she heard Data's voice coming from the sleeping area "I already did all the steps necessary prior to such an occasion: I brought some flowers from the arboretum and replicated a bottle of wine to bring over, I'm almost done changing into casual clothes, and I've already fed Spot so she would sleep the time we are not home through. The only thing left is you changing and we can make a move!" he explained meticulously "Maybe we'll be late a few minutes, but it's really not a tragedy!" he added on a soothing voice as he checked his internal chronometer and found that it was 2057.
But it was as if Emma didn't even hear him, she just went on with freaking herself out "It's the worst start ever to be late! She'll hate me from the first minute--" she trailed off as she stepped into the sleeping area and found Data there really in the middle of changing.
He was almost dressed, only his white shirt was open which he was starting to button from the bottom up and he seemed quite wrapped up in what he was doing. "You really need not to worry so much! I told you she's a nice person. She is not easy to irritate." he told her absently not even looking up. When she didn't answer, he glanced up at her quickly, then seeing her dumbstruck expression he looked at her puzzled.
She stared at him spell-bound looking at the pale skin of his chest and stomach visible underneath his open shirt. He was so beautiful! So perfect! She drank in all his curves and plains with her gaze, his unblemished skin, the muscles of his flat stomach, the lines of his ribs and collarbone - he was so skinny! and so unbelievably attractive... Emma swallowed as their eyes met. He stood there so confused, probably had no idea how enticing his looks were.
"Sorry if I... embarrassed you!" he told her on a low voice and pulled his shirt together shyly.
"Oh-eh...mmm..." when it dawned on her that no coherent word would leave her lips in the near future, she decided to stick with non-verbal communication and just shook her head. The shit are you doing, idiot?! she screamed to herself. Why don't you just take a fork and a knife and start to devour this timid guy literally as if he was a piece of meat that you're making him feel like?! Get your shit together already!
She shook her head again "We'll be late..." she muttered and bolted to the bathroom. He gazed after her still puzzled. She was so absent-minded that she didn't even close the door behind herself, just put her palms on the small cupboard containing the basin and shut her eyes tightly to get a grip. Whenever she saw or felt just a glimpse of his perfectness, the feeling of sheer inadequateness followed the overpowering desire. Her body was so far away from being perfect as the Enterprise was from Earth. She felt she somehow violated him by staring at his body knowing full well, that her own body could never cause such amazement in return.
She raised her swaying head and vaguely tried to open her uniform's fastening again but still overwhelmed by his sight, her hands felt weak. "Are you alright?" she heard his voice and snapping her head sideways, took a sharp breath in scared. She exhaled it seeing him as he stood in the doorway. He stepped in reluctantly "I didn't mean to scare you."
She shook her head swallowing hard and managed to give him a faint smile "No-no, it's just..." her hands came up to the neck of her uniform top again "I think this damn thing got stuck..." she couldn't think of anything else to say.
He smiled and cocked his head sideways "May I help?"
She nodded wordlessly - it seemed the ability to verbally express herself was left outside in the corridor. He stepped in, then surprising her, turned her to the mirror and standing behind her circled her with his arms.
"Let me see..." he whispered and wiped her hair from her neck and shoulder so he could look at the fastening of her uniform top from above. She felt his warm body pressing tightly to hers from behind and his breath in her ear sent a hot fire coursing down to her abdomen. She bit her lower lip and tried very hard to concentrate on what his hands were doing. But his palms were brushing the top of her breasts as her chest heaved underneath his hands, and she needed to forcefully stop herself from whimpering at the gentle, inadvertent caress.
When the damn fastenings finally gave way, a moment of relief washed through her, hoping that the exquisite torture would finally end. But it seemed he had other plans, because he slowly pushed her uniform top open, by sliding his hand down between the two sides - between her two breasts and over her stomach. She vaguely thought that perhaps he had no idea what he was doing to her - but then he put his lips to the nape of her neck and kissed her there lightly. Oh, yes, he knew exactly what he was doing! When the uniform top opened, he pressed his palms to her abdomen and started to slid his hands upward while he followed the curve of her neck with his lips.
His hands gently cupped her small breasts through her thin under-shirt, thumbs brushing the sensitive nipples, while he kissed and licked her earlobe - knowing all too well how crazy that could drive her! She let out a soft moan as she couldn't stand his ministrations any longer and grabbing his hands pushed her breasts into his palms. This time, they moaned in union at the feeling.
"Ah, god..." she whimpered and turning her head to the side, she claimed his mouth with hers. He held her close from behind and pushed his tongue into her mouth hungrily. When she responded eagerly, he let her go for a moment, just to turn her around and crush her into a tight embrace. He kissed her deeply again, and as he felt her pushing his shirt off his shoulders, he slid his hands to her butt and grabbed her firmly. She slid her hand down his bare back feeling his tight muscles and his blade-bone then slid it up again to his neck then into his hair pulling his head down to her almost as if her life depended on that singular kiss.
In a sudden movement, he picked her up and sat her on the low cupboard. She looked down at him breathing heavily: his shirt was off his shoulders halfway down his arms, his hair was dishevelled and his lips glistened from their kisses - and his eyes reflected pure love and hunger. Her throat closed as she understood how much he wanted her, but he didn't give her too much time to contemplate this, as he pulled her in for another kiss. When she put her arms around him, she knew he'd discarded his shirt, because as her hands roamed his upper body she felt that he was naked from the waistline up. He pushed her uniform top off her shoulders, making her let go of him for a moment, then breaking away from her, let her take it off. She wanted to reclaim his mouth but it seemed he didn't have enough of undressing her. Smiling, he bent down, and kissing her knee, pulled her boots off, first one, then the other - and the next moment, his hands were at the waistline of her trousers pulling out her under-shirt. She had no time to protest, he simply pulled it upward and she, obediently raising her arms, let him take it off of her.
As usual, she wore nothing underneath, and he gazed at her nude breasts almost in a trance. She again found herself wondering how he could find any attraction for her body, for her breasts. They were not so round and firm as they used to be ten years ago, they grew heavier with the years, and her nipples became a little less delicate. Time was not easy on any other parts of her body either. The skin on her stomach became a little wrinkled and underneath there was a little excessive fat - she had kept joking she might end up doing the same diet Spot needed a month ago, whenever the topic came up. And he was always such a gentleman, always found something he could complement her on to divert her attention. But this was all wrong! He should have been with somebody who was more adequate to him! Who was young and beautiful! Just like he was...
He looked into her eyes with wonder on his features and it made her snap out of her sad reverie. She couldn't help but return his smile and combed through his hair with her fingers tenderly. Shutting his eyes for a brief moment, he turned toward her gentle touch, then opened his eyes and closing the distance, kissed her on the lips once again. After a short moment though, he took his mouth away and once again looked down at her nude breasts. He tentatively cupped one into his palm and sliding his thumb over her nipple felt it tighten instinctively. He needed to feel what that was like if he caressed her with his mouth! So he bent to her other breast and took her nipple between his lips.
She sucked in a breath and her hand instinctively came up to tangle into his hair to hold him to her. He slid his tongue over her nipple then feeling it respond to his touch, he gently scraped it with his lower teeth - it instantly tightened and he heard her moan. With a short kiss, he took his mouth away slowly and stared up into her eyes once again. She combed through his mussed up hair tenderly. A moment later he claimed her mouth pulling her close and clasping her legs around his waist.
The next thing she knew was that they were kissing in his bed feverishly. It was no simple fooling around anymore. It was not innocent, light patting before falling asleep. It was not gentle exploring each other's bodies through their clothes. It was hot, hard, furious passion, and she knew, she felt he wanted this desperately after over a long month of teasing each other to nuts. I want to give it to you! Take me, baby! her mind screamed as she sank her nails into the skin of his back and pulled him close almost tearing at his flesh! And he responded with a grunt of pleasure, gently biting her tongue with his teeth and then grinding his hips to hers.
Oh, I want you so much! she felt she could cry from the craving! But suddenly she heard another voice in her head asking her the one question, she kept asking herself whenever she thought about giving in to their passion. And then? Maybe they would have some amazing nights. Maybe even years. But the reality would remain reality. She was growing old. He was not. He was perfect, she was anything but perfect. She was convinced he would some day find somebody and just as her luck usually went, when she would finally let herself believe that this all was true, he would simply walk away with another girl. Someone who was younger and more beautiful. Someone he really deserved even right now, when he was wasting his time on her.
And her body tensed up! Oh, I'm crazy! I must be! But I just can't! I can't! She suddenly broke away "I can't..." she breathed. He stared at her with utter disbelief in his eyes. She tried to ignore his expression and pushed him off of herself. He obeyed and rolled to his side letting her sit up. But she couldn't get up from the bed, her legs were so weak, so she just sat there on the edge feeling his confused gaze on herself.
She cleared her throat and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand "We'll be late..." she told him silently.
After a long moment, he pushed himself up to a sitting position pulling his legs under him and took some deep breaths to calm his desires still running wild. When he felt, he had at least one processing thread that was free to think clearly, he crawled a little closer to where she sat slouching, rigid on the edge. But he didn't dare to touch her.
"Emma. I believe we made a promise to one another. At the very beginning. We promised we'd be honest with each other. Please do not lie to me." he asked on a silent voice.
She turned her face away impatiently "It's not a lie that we'll be late. It's a fact. Moreover, we already are late. So..." she started to get up, but he didn't let her: without thinking, he took her by the arm and pulled her down on the bed once more - he just couldn't let her run away like that!
But she stared at him suddenly hostilely - almost scared "I think I've told you, I don't appreciate you showing off your inhuman strength on me." she growled warningly.
He let her go shocked and bowed his head "Forgive me." he whispered guiltily, and she shut her eyes feeling remorse washing over her. Oh, it's not you, who should feel so horrible! It's not you! Her hands came up into fists. Bev was right. She needed to at least try to explain this to him... She raised her head, but before she could speak, he gazed into her eyes wistfully "Is that it?" her only response was a confused furrow of her brows "Is that why you do not wish to consummate our relationship? Because you are scared of me? Because I'm not human." he asked, and she could see that he tried hard to conceal the pain behind that one devastating question.
She opened her mouth to answer, but no sound came out, she just shook her head stunned. Bev was right! He did get an idea into his head - but this?!
Data went on silently "I know you are attracted. At times, just as now, you let yourself be carried away by that attraction. However... I presume there's always something that reminds you, how far I am from humanity. And how far I'll always be. And at those times... you grow scared or... or disgusted. I am unsure which one..."
Her hands came up into tight fists as she listened in complete shock. She wished nothing but crushing him into a tight embrace and kissing him wherever she could reach to reassure him. But she just couldn't move. She felt petrified, only her hands clutched the blanket so tightly that her knuckles became white.
He saw her hands and gently brushed the tips of his long fingers over it "It is alright, Emma." he whispered on a broken voice "If you wish to end our relationship, I will not blame you. Please don't torture yourself. You gave me so much, I'm so grateful to you..."
And whatever else he was about to say was swallowed in her kiss. His eyes closed in pleasure, he felt her grip his shoulder and neck so tightly that was he a human, his blood would be staining the bedclothes now.
She then suddenly let go and took his face into her palms almost violently "Shut up!" she forced it out between her teeth "How can you... say such a thing?!" she pulled him close with a tearless sob, and held him as tightly as she could breathing heavily "Oh, shut up, you crazy ...you sweet... you precious..." she shook her head helplessly "How can you? How can you think that?!" she asked barely able to believe that he uttered the last few sentences.
"It has crossed my mind many times in fact." he gently pushed her back to look into her eyes and seeing her disbelieving expression, he went on "I'm not a human. I'm just a look-alike. Some would even say... only a mockery. ...I do know that you care about me, but you may still have your reservations. I am... only a machine after all."
She shut her eyes bowing her head slouching "And I thought my inhibitions are painful." she whispered on a shaken voice. She then looked up at him feeling her mind clear a little and then cuddled up to him, making him take her into his arms. He complied though a bit confused, but held her close lovingly. She took a deep breath feeling the tight grip in her chest lessen even for a little bit with his touch "Data..." she whispered "You are the single most beautiful creature I've ever encountered in my whole life. You must never think that you are less than a human. Never!" she gave his body a gentle squeeze.
"I know I am not less." he replied almost matter-of-factly "I am superior to humans in several things. Still this does not change the fact that I'm a machine."
She needed a moment to try to take the courage to make the confession she needed to make - now even owed him to make! Then she pulled away and looked into his eyes.
"You're right about our agreement. We agreed on being honest with each other. No matter how difficult it is. So here's the thing..." she swallowed hard fighting her embarrassment "I'm attracted to you. Sometimes so much so that I feel tortured, helpless. The pleasure your touch can make me feel sometimes borders on pain. And I..." she shook her head frustrated "I can't think about anything but what would happen afterwards! What would happen if I let myself completely trust you? What would happen if you by accident suddenly happen to realize how wonderful you are? And what would happen if then, you met another woman? Somebody who is young and beautiful and as wonderful as you are - and is not full of self-doubt and sarcasm and whose body isn't anything but perfect. I'm 43. And I'm not gonna get any younger. And I keep thinking that... one day, you'll open your eyes, look around and will see... the chasm between the two of us..." she bowed her head, cheeks burning, feeling completely humiliated by her confession.
After a moment, she felt the tips of his fingers under her chin. He gently turned her face upward, just as she usually did to him. He gazed at her with a tentative smile of wonder "Emma. You are perfect in your humanity! The imperfections of your body makes you so adorably human!" he slid his hand down her neck over her collarbone, and her breath was caught. He stopped at her shoulder where she had a small birthmark, and then bowed his head to it and kissed it tenderly. Then looked into her eyes now reflecting amazement once again "These are the things that make you the person you are. Even your self-doubt and sarcasm. All your mistakes. All the imperfections of your body. You are not the statue of beauty, but a beautiful human! I want you for what you are! A human!" he took her hand and kissed it gently then squeezing it he went on "You told me once, you do not wish to know the future. Why are you doubting that future now?"
She shook her head at her own stupidity of the past "Because at the time I told you that crap, I had no idea what you would mean to me now. As time goes by, it's more and more difficult to feel negligent about the thought of letting you go, if life required it."
He smiled again in wonder "But is it not wonderful? Is it not how we are supposed to feel? Is it not how two people bond with each other? I find the prospect of letting you go as difficult as you might. And it's the most fascinating emotion I've ever had! However Emma, I find it even more difficult to see you unhappy." he stroked her long hair tenderly "I will wait for you as long as you need me to wait." he whispered "As I have promised you. But please don't torture yourself the way you've been doing. Please let me help! Any way I can!" he cupped her face in his palm and stroked her cheek with his thumb. She wordlessly took his hand and kissed his fingers one by one gratefully.
Then staring into his honest gaze, she started crooning silently:
"Perhaps I had a wicked childhood
Perhaps I had a miserable youth
But somewhere in my wicked, miserable past
There must have been a moment of truth"
She smiled tenderly at him and smiling back he asked: "What is this?"
"A woman trying to figure out why she deserved the happiness she got from life." she smiled shyly "I feel that way now. No matter how naughty all my life I've been, there must've been something that made the universe think I deserve meeting you... and having you here and now."
He smiled timidly but then looked at her raising his eyebrows "I know a certain someone, who would now tell you, that if you don't stop, we'll die of diabetes, this is so corny and sweet!"
She shook her head laughing softly "You are getting exceedingly good at teasing, Deadpan! I'll need to pay more attention! This was fairly a low ball for you to catch!" they chuckled. She cuddled to him, stroking his cheek with one hand and bringing his lips to hers, she gave him two quick kisses "Let's go to your mom." she whispered "And we can go on with this trail of thought afterwards."
He pulled her in for another kiss, then "Or any other previous ones for that matter."
Italics are from Sound of Music - This is NOT gonna be a song-fic again, I promise, it just gave itself really :)
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Blind Chess