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The Awakening of Amy Farrah Fowler	By : Thu Category: 1 through F > The Big Bang Theory Views: 15163 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own The Big Bang Theory or its characters. I have not nor will I make any money from this work of fiction.

Chapter List
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Chapter 3--The Inebriation Fiasco

Amy sighed irritably and slumped down into the chair in her office at Cal Tech. She was increasingly dissatisfied with her work—it seemed now that the things that had charged her creativity and imagination in days past were just no longer doing it for her. Mapping the neural pathways of lower-order primates now seemed so…retrograde.

She thought back longingly to the days of working with Sheldon on their Nobel Prize-winning super asymmetry theorem. Though just barely a year ago, it already seemed like some sort of halcyon memory—on the stage in Stockholm, wearing her diamond tiara, feeling like a queen as she stood at the pinnacle of the scientific world. The celebrity, the accolades, the money--most of it sitting in the bank, and Sheldon and me still living in an apartment, she grumped to herself. Everything now was simply so blasé.

Even her sex life--which she had hoped was taking off like a rocket to the moon--had stalled out. It was over a month now since she and Penny had had their wild night of passion, and Penny had scarcely said two words to her since. It was as if all her worst nightmares about what could happen to their friendship after something like that were coming true. In the past Penny had been distant, and, if Amy were being honest with herself here, frankly condescending at times after they had fooled around, but all their previous experiences together had been so…tame, compared to what they had gone through with one another the last time.

To say nothing of Sheldon, who hadn’t so much as touched her in almost four months. What had happened with her and Penny had awakened something in her that didn’t want to be stilled, though she’d been trying her best since then to---to what? To save herself for Penny? She hadn’t even polished her own pearl once since then, although she’d been in the mood to a number of times. There was just something so…exquisite about what had happened with her and her best friend, and now Amy was mortally afraid that they had done permanent damage to their friendship.

All I did was love her, Amy thought. Is that some kind of fucking crime? And now she acts like I’m…dogshit on the bottom of her shoe. I wish we had never fucked at all, Amy thought to herself, but as soon as that thought formed, she knew it wasn’t true. She just couldn’t understand why Penny was so dismissive of her. And my own husband won’t touch me with a ten-foot pole. She felt tears start to well in her eyes, and her nose got a little runny.

Stalled out? She thought to herself. Ha! My sex life is a shambles, a frustrating, unfunny joke, just like it’s always been. A couple of weeks ago she’d taken Penny’s advice on how to get Sheldon to let Amy blow him, and it had backfired spectacularly. The two had gotten naked and gone to bed, and as soon as they lay down she had told Sheldon to close his eyes, and she put the head of his cock in her mouth and started to suck on it. He let her do it for a second or two, and Amy could swear she had felt him starting to get hard when he practically jumped out of his skin: he asked Amy if she’d gone mad, asked her why she thought he would like something like that, and then told her to go rinse her mouth out with some mouthwash. After that he wouldn’t speak to her for the rest of the evening. And that was the last time he’d so much as looked at her with an inkling of desire.

She still felt humiliated thinking about it; humiliated and angry. Of all people, what right did her own husband have to make her feel ashamed simply for having a red-blooded woman’s sex drive?

The office phone startled her from her doldrums. She looked at the caller ID. It was Sheldon. She wasn’t even sure if she wanted to talk to him right now, but she exhaled deeply and hit the speaker button.

“Hi Sheldon. What’s up?”

“Hi Amy. Just wondering when you’ll be home tonight. And are you going to bring some dinner?”

“I guess I can pick something up. What do you want?”

“Giuseppe’s pizza. Mushrooms and light olives.”

“Ich. Sheldon you know I hate olives.”

“Well fine—just get it on half. I’m going to be at Leonard’s for Halo night…could call me when you get home so I can eat and get back here?”

Amy got irritated. “Sheldon, I’m not feeling so hot right now, I’m really kind of down. I could use some time tonight, some…attention from you.”

“You know it’s Halo night…why can’t we do that on date night? We’ve already got it scheduled.”

Typical. Her temper got the best of her. “You know what Sheldon? Why don’t you just order a pizza yourself. I’m going to go out with the girls tonight. At least they’ll pay attention to me.” She punched the speaker button and cut him off mid-sentence.

The office phone rang again, but she ignored it. She wondered why he hadn’t called her cell phone, but noticed the battery was dead. She plugged it into the charger and cleaned up the lab for a bit, then group-texted Penny and Bernadette, not even bothering to look at Sheldon’s texts or listen to his voicemail.

Hey ladies—want to go out for a drink? She was hoping against hope that Penny might respond, might come down from whatever bitch-space she was in and just let things go back to normal. She wondered if Penny’s pregnancy loss had anything to do with it; when Penny lost the baby just a few weeks after Sheldon’s bumbling announcement to the world from the podium in Stockholm, Penny had been furious. Do I share guilt by association just because I was standing beside him on that stage? She had no idea; Penny had never once wanted to talk about it, and Amy had never thought to press her.

Amy’s heart hurt with longing because she wanted so much more than just friendship from Penny, but even that friendship by itself meant the world to her, and she would do anything to have some semblance of it back, just for an hour or two tonight. She headed out for the long walk to the car, but nobody answered her text.

I’m invisible, she thought meekly. The tears threatened to return, but she stiffened her resolve. She knew exactly what she needed now. A good stiff drink. As she drove out of the parking lot she let her mind go blank; she felt like she was on auto-pilot. Cruising aimlessly down the night-time streets of Pasadena, she passed a dingy little stand-alone shop with a bright green cross in the window, and idly wondered what it would be like to get high. She ended up stopping at Ye Olde Grub Hub. It was dark, cheap and quiet. Not a wine bar like she usually frequented—tonight she wanted something harder.

There was quiet jazz music playing on the speakers as she sat on a stool at the bar. It was very dim inside, and Amy found that she liked it. The bright lights of the lab always killed her eyes by the end of the day. The cheesy English pub décor even seemed inviting; warm wooden walls with dartboards and coats of arms.

The barkeeper asked what her drink was; Amy was still spacing off and was barely aware she had responded as she checked out the establishment. “Vodka and soda. Grey Goose, please,” she replied. “Make it a double,” she called out as the keeper walked away. She and Sheldon had almost six hundred thousand dollars in the bank of the million they’d received for the Nobel prize. California taxes were a bitch, and flying a gaggle of friends to Sweden and putting them up for a couple weeks in style had cost a pretty penny. Still, she reasoned, that’s a lot of money. No reason I need to drink the cheap stuff.

She checked out the bartender’s rear-end as she walked away. She was black, had long, beautiful straight hair, looked in her early 40s or so, though it was extremely hard to tell, and she was extremely shapely: broad-hipped, ass to beat the band, and her breasts? As she returned with Amy’s drink she favored Amy with a dazzling smile, which was finally enough to draw Amy’s attention away from her amazingly full chest. She’s so pretty! Amy thought to herself. And god, am I horny!

“Here you go sweetie. Start a tab?”

“Yes please,” Amy said, and she realized that she wanted to flirt with her but had no idea how. Her ears colored red, (she knew the feeling well) and she hoped that Sierra (she had read her nametag) couldn’t see it in the dim light. She turned her attention to her drink, and almost before she knew it her drink was gone. She signaled Sierra for another.

“My, that was fast,” Sierra laughed when she brought Amy another. “You ain’t gonna cause me any problems, are you?” She winked at Amy, and Amy felt herself blush again.

“No ma’am,” she replied. “I’m sweet as sugar.” Amber laughed again and walked away. Amy rolled her eyes at herself. Sweet as sugar? Where the hell did that come from? She remembered ruefully Penny once telling her that she was corny when she was flirting, and boy did she ever feel that way now. But Penny had also said she was cute when she was flirting, so she hoped that was coming across too. It was nice to be winked at, even though she was pretty sure there was no vibing going on between her and Sierra. Or is there? Sierra looked over her shoulder at Amy, still smiling, but Amy dismissed it as her imagination.

In just a few minutes that second double was gone. She had a really good buzz going, and out of embarrassment at not wanting to seem like a lush as much as anything, she asked for a glass of water to go with her next drink. As she sipped it she slowly looked around the bar. A tragically sad song by Billie Holliday was piping into the air. It was so full of loneliness and despair that Amy had to stop paying attention for fear she might tear up; the alcohol was starting to numb her sadness a bit and she didn’t want to ruin that relief by becoming maudlin.

As she scanned the bar, she thought she saw a familiar face, and took a longer look. There could be no mistaking that hulking form—there in the far corner at a booth was Bert, the geologist from Cal Tech. He noticed her and waved. He looked forlorn and lonely himself, Amy thought, and she decided to go over and say hello.

“Hi Bert,” Amy piped. She could hardly believe how much a couple of stiff drinks and a wink from a pretty girl had lightened her mood. She was feeling downright chipper compared to just a little bit ago. Wow, this hard stuff really does the trick fast! I’ve been missing the boat sticking with wine!

“Hi Amy—good to see you. What brings you here?”

“Oh, not much. Truthfully, I’m annoyed at my husband and avoiding going home.” Whoops—is that TMI? I guess it’s probably ok…

“What did he do?” Leave it to Bert to ask the one question that would lead to TMI.

“Oh, it’s not important. Do you mind if I sit down?”

“Of course!” Bert seemed thrilled as Amy scooted into the booth and took a seat.

She smiled at Bert, feeling strangely shy for some reason she couldn’t put her finger on. They talked about the weather for a few minutes, and then signaled their server for a round of drinks. They didn’t really talk about anything consequential, but Bert seemed intensely interested in anything Amy had to say, and she found herself warming to the conversation and to the man himself.

Now that she thought about it, it was nice to just feel seen. She found herself thinking that maybe this was an even better evening than spending it with the girls or Sheldon—no worrying about how Penny was going to treat her, nor wondering how to get a word in edgewise as Bernie narcissistically droned on about her latest pregnancy, no sitting around hoping desperately for some tiny crumb of physical affection from her husband.

During a brief lull in the conversation, she found herself longing for the olden days when she had had no friends, no lovers—nothing but her work, and an intense devotion to science, and that had been enough. But as she looked into Bert’s deep brown eyes, almost black in the dimly lit bar, her stomach got faintly warm and tight and she caught herself short.

Am I getting turned on by Bert? She had never viewed him that way before; he had just always been…well, just Bert. But now she found him handsome, in an offbeat sort of way. He was incredibly tall and looked strong—Amy liked that in a man—and though he didn’t have much hair on his head he had that short, well-trimmed beard of red-golden hair shot through with white, and immense, soft, intelligent eyes that hung on her every word.

She knew that he’d had a thing for her once: the way he always would stop by her office or lab, bringing her beautiful rocks. He always took time to explain them in depth, so that they were not just beautiful but also had meaning—a story behind them, and though she hadn’t understood it at the time, a deeper meaning for Amy personally as well. She had been so hung up on Sheldon then that she hadn’t appreciated the gifts, nor even Bert, as she now felt she might have.

Bert got up and excused himself to go to the bathroom. As he slid out of the booth, Amy found her eyes drawn down below his waist; she wasn’t trying to look but Bert was so tall that his crotch was practically at her eye-level as she sat. She colored, but before she could look away, she noticed even through his pants that Bert was packing serious heat. It took her a moment to register fully just how immense his member was—he couldn’t even hide it through his very loose pants. She blushed in full now, her eyes darting up to his face, but if Bert had seen her surreptitious glance he didn’t let on.

She smoothed her skirt and cleared her throat. Yeah, ok. Definitely turned on. This had better be my last drink. And yet before she even realized what she was doing, she signaled for another round. If Bert and I were together, I wouldn’t be going home to an absent husband, and feel desperately horny, dying for a simple human touch. She surprised herself at the strong spike of venom that accompanied the thought. For fuck’s sake, I’m a Halo widow. She took a slug off her new drink as Bert returned, and she found herself wanting to open up to him now. Freudian slip, there? she thought to herself, and smiled at her private joke.

“You look happy,” Bert said in his quiet, froggy voice, one that Amy somehow found cute tonight.

“You know what Bert? I am?” And in that Amy surprised herself twice: once that her reply was, at least for the moment, the truth, and the other that she was willing to share this with Bert.

“I guess I was just smiling because it’s nice to have some company. I was feeling lonely tonight, and I don’t know that you and I have ever really sat down and chatted, just the two of us.”

“Well there’s no way an incredible lady like yourself should feel lonely. That makes me kind of sad.” Bert stammered the last, as if he didn’t know where to go after that awkward compliment.

“Don’t be. I’m not. It’s just that…well you know. After winning the Nobel and all…Jesus, I’m starting to sound like Howard after his trip to space. Always bragging about the one awesome thing I’ve done…” she trailed off.

“No, please, go on,” said Bert. He seemed sincere. “It’s nice to talk with another scientist who’s capable of achieving at such a high level.”

“Oh Bert, stop it,” Amy rolled her eyes and felt herself blushing again. “No, it’s just that I was thinking about…well, about what a let-down life can be after something like that. When I was on the stage there in Stockholm, dedicating my prize to all the young girls in the world who might be interested in science, and seeing my friends in the audience…well, it’s been one of the highlights of my life. Certainly the highlight of my professional life. And I guess it’s hard for me to know where to go from there. It feels like I’m back doing the same thing I was doing before…as if it were all some crazy dream and now life’s just back to plain old boring normal.”

“You were beautiful on that stage. I was watching, you know; from here, halfway across the world. You looked like a princess,” Bert said, his eyes fixed intently on Amy’s. Through his thick glasses Amy could still see the depth of emotion in his eyes. Then it was Bert’s turn to go beet-red, visible even in the low light, and he looked around as if embarrassed. Amy thrilled at the compliment.

“Thank you, Bert. That means a lot,” she said softly. Without even realizing it she had reached across the table and patted the wrist attached to his giant hand, which was holding a pint of dark ale. He took a long draw off of it as Amy quickly drew her hand away. When he put it back down he had a small froth of foam attached to his mustache, and for some reason Amy found it the most charming thing in the world when he wrapped his bottom lip over it and noisily sucked the foam off.

“I can relate to your feelings though Amy. After I won the MacArthur Genius Grant, I had a little fame. A little money. Well a lot, actually. But it didn’t make me happy. I started dating, but it was the wrong kind of women. That didn’t make me happy either. Then I was back doing what I was doing. Don’t get me wrong…I love geology. Rocks have been my passion ever since I was a little boy and found a 12-inch amethyst geode in my back yard. It caught the sunlight like a glittering white ice cave, shot through with purple quartz and tiny flecks of pyrite that sparkled like stars…” His eyes went distant, as if lost in an old memory. He went on. “Still, over time I guess it’s led to some new grants and research opportunities. Maybe eventually something new and exciting will pan out for you too. It is the Nobel, after all.”

“I guess I hadn’t thought about that Bert. You and I have both achieved incredible accolades from the scientific community, and yet we’ve both suffered from this ennui, a sort of hangover of some kind. I’m glad to hear you say that though. I’m kind of down now but maybe it doesn’t always have to be that way. I guess I’m just dubious because my prize was in physics, and that’s Sheldon’s field. It’s panned out a lot better for him than it has for me.”

Bert said nothing, but as he drank deeply from his beer his eyes never left Amy’s. She was starting to lose her shyness about the whole situation; frankly it felt wonderful to have someone pay this much attention to her. She knew it wouldn’t lead anywhere, but still there was a deep satisfaction to it, seeing as she did how strongly Bert was still attracted to her, and thrilling to her to see him in this new light.

Just then her phone buzzed, and she had two texts in rapid succession.

From Penny: Sorry Amy, no can do tonight. Working super late on a big rollout.

From Bernadette: Hey Amy could you do me a favor? I can’t get away from work and Howie needs some cough syrup for Hallie. Could you drop some by?

Well, at least Penny did me the courtesy of responding, Amy frowned. She sighed. She replied in the affirmative to Bernadette’s text, but said nothing to Penny.

“Well Bert, looks like I have to get going. Bernie’s kid’s sick and I need to bring her some medicine.” Amy polished off the last of her drink; she was feeling super buzzed. Boy that vodka really sneaks up on you!

“That’s ok. You’re a good friend. I should get going too. Let me pay up and I’ll walk you to your car.” Bert left for the counter, and Amy found herself appreciating his gentlemanly gesture.

“I paid your tab,” Bert said shyly on his return.

“Aww…you didn’t have to do that. Next time it’s on me.”

“There’ll be a next time?” Bert’s voice cracked slightly in surprise.

Amy thought for a moment. “Well…why not? Want to do this next Wednesday? Same time, same place?”

“Sure!” Bert seemed genuinely thrilled, and Amy felt a little excited herself. She had, she realized, just made a date with Bert. And she also knew that she wasn’t going to tell Sheldon about it. The thought of having a secret date (even if she didn’t have in mind any clear intention of where it might lead) was profoundly exciting, and it was with some effort that she kept her eyes off Bert’s pants as she turned around and headed for the door.

It was a short walk, and Bert was parked right next to her. She turned to him and smiled. “Well…it was nice running into you. So, I guess I’ll see you next week?”

Bert just smiled. He reached out awkwardly as if to shake her hand, but Amy surprised herself by going in for a hug. It was long and close, and as his immense hands wrapped around her waist, she purposely pressed her breasts tightly to him and pulled in even closer (shocked at herself) so that she could feel the giant sausage in his pants stir against her hip. She smiled, and then let go before it got awkward (well, awkward for her anyway).

Without looking at him she said, “Good night Bert!” and popped into her car, pulling off without a word. In her rearview mirror she caught a glimpse of Bert standing there staring after her, looking vaguely bewildered (in the way he often did) and Amy laughed out loud to herself as she headed to pick up Halley’s medicine.

Amy was in a sort of cloud as she went about her errand. She found herself deeply aroused at the thought that she had made Bert horny (she knew she had; she’d felt his arousal stirring against her!) A delighted thought struck her that Bert might just go home and flog that immense log of his while thinking about her, and she blushed though there was no one else around, finding that thought intensely satisfying. Am I a prick tease? She wondered and laughed aloud at the thought. Only if you don’t plan on doing anything about it… she said to herself, and then her face got serious, and she forced a nervous laugh.

Bernie had texted her exactly what to get, and after she had picked up the cough medicine she sent Sheldon a quick text to let him know what was going on. When she got to Altadena she parked in Bernie and Howard’s driveway and went to the door, noticing that it had been left open a crack.

That’s odd, she thought. For a moment she considered knocking, but for some reason she held off. She could see TV light flickering through the crack in the door and against the shut drapes, and then she heard a loud moan and stuck her ear to the door. No mistaking it—it was the sound of people having sex.

It must be Howard watching porn! She thought again about knocking, but felt an intense wave of heat surge from her stomach, up her torso and to her face, then down through her loins and thighs, and almost before she knew it she had slipped in through the door and shut it almost all the way again. She peeked around the corner from the vestibule.

Sure enough, the lights were off, and Howard was watching porn on the big screen TV. A blonde with immense tits swaying (Well, we know Howard has a type) was on her knees greedily sucking on a fat cock as an otherwise unseen male moaned in ecstasy. Howard’s back was to her, but as she listened closely, she could plainly hear the sound of his wrist slapping against his thigh as he jerked off.

Amy paused, unsure of what to do. An incredible surge of horniness that had slowly begun building with Bert had now swept to full flower, and she felt herself growing wet between the thighs. As she watched the oral sex on the screen, she thought back to how desperately she had been wanting to go down on Sheldon lately, to no avail. She was sure Howard wouldn’t mind a blow job. Many things he might be, but a prude was not one of them.

But from me? I must be drunk. She wasn’t even attracted to Howard. Or at least, never had been, until right now. She thought for a moment about how to make it happen, but Howard was beginning to pound his pud furiously now, and she knew that if she didn’t act soon he would cum, and the opportunity would be lost. Screw thinking everything to death. I’m over it! She decided to improvise; she shut the door audibly and cleared her throat.

Howard practically jumped out of his skin, and literally did jump off the couch and turn around. “Amy! What the hell! I didn’t hear you come in, I…” he was scrambling around now for something to cover himself with, but it looked like he didn’t have any clothes anywhere near. What, is he just marching around the house naked? Amy briefly noted his small, erect penis springing from a patch of extremely short pubic hair, and a surprisingly large scrotum hanging below it before Howard covered them with his hands.

“I see you’re…busy,” Amy went on, feeling embarrassed now as well as titillated. This was the first time she had ever seen one of The Guys naked besides Sheldon, and she was enjoying it. He was small and skinny, but she supposed there was a ropy sort of attraction to him. Amy decided there was no time for equivocating as Howard stammered and stuttered. She set down the paper bag with Hallie’s medicine and walked toward him, feeling a new boldness come over her.

“That looks like fun on TV…why don’t we try it out?” she said suggestively, as Howard stepped back. She didn’t watch much porn; (Sheldon was far too computer savvy for her to risk discovery by looking at it on her laptop) but she knew enough so that her cornball line sounded authentically…porny.

“Amy, I mean what the hell, I just don’t think that…what are you doing here?” He looked confused, and Amy smiled. Something had shifted; she knew now that she was suddenly in control of the situation, and if she played her cards right she would get what she wanted.

“Bernadette sent me over with some medicine for Halley, but it doesn’t look like that’s what I’m here for, does it?” she said with a sultry confidence she was actually starting to feel. The man on the TV gave an exaggerated moan of pleasure, and they both looked at the screen. A sudden flash of inspiration hit Amy, and without a word she pulled her purple sweater vest over her head and began undoing the buttons on her blouse.

“Why don’t you help me with this?” she asked in a low voice, and she took his hands away from his crotch and put them at her chest, stepping into him even more closely.

He stopped retreating and began fumbling with the buttons on her blouse. Boy, he’s easy, Amy thought, thrilled that she had been able to so quickly get to him this way.

Before long her blouse was off, and Howard was gasping with excitement. Amy was incredibly turned on, and as soon as Howard was done unclasping her bra she let it slide down and pulled Howard’s head to her chest.

Amy stood there smiling for a moment as Howard greedily suckled one breast, roughly fondling the other one, but in a minute she closed her eyes and groaned…she was really getting hot now, and was too into the moment to be surprised at what was happening. Now she took Howard’s cock into her hand and began gently stroking it; he was practically dripping pre-cum, and afraid of encouraging him unduly to finish too soon, she let go of it and crouched slightly to fondle his warm, slightly sweaty sac. Yep, she thought. This is going to happen.

She took him by the shoulders and roughly pushed him to the couch as he exhaled in surprise. He sat down and in a second Amy was down on her knees, and Howard gasped in pleasure as Amy immediately buried his cock to the hilt in her mouth.

Amy hardly had a second to register that here, beyond all belief, was the first penis she had ever had in her mouth. And me pushing 40! She thought briefly of Sheldon’s baffling denial of this pleasure (If Sheldon weren’t such an obstreperous prude, I wouldn’t be on my knees sucking Howie’s dick!) and began to suck on it almost angrily, but then she settled in and just concentrated on enjoying the sensation.

Howard had made numerous references to his…modest endowment, over the years, and while he was certainly much smaller than Sheldon (even in her dearth of experience, she knew strictly from watching a little porn that she had lucked out with Sheldon in that department), she actually found it less…intimidating, and it was still incredibly satisfying.

His dick was warm and stiff and…well, meaty in her mouth, and she got even more turned on; Howard had reached down to fondle her breasts, and she began to experiment, not knowing after all what she was doing.

She felt him start to thrust when she had pulled him in to the back of her throat and closed her mouth tightly about him with some heavy suction; even with his modest size she had gagged a bit, and Howard seemed delighted by that; she filed it away for future reference.

Now she pulled it out of her mouth and began stroking it, getting a better look in the dim, flickering porn light. She supposed it were five inches long or so, maybe a bit thicker in diameter than a man’s thumb. He had a purplish tip like a small mushroom head with a rather large urethra. It was trickling a clear fluid and she licked at it, tasting its viscous, rather salty flavor as Howard gently held the back of her head. There was very little hair on his crotch; it looked like he usually kept it shaved but hadn’t done any trimming in a while.

On a whim she lifted his cock and took his balls in her mouth; it was almost a comical feeling, but she reveled in the new experience. It was quite a large mouthful and she really had to stretch to get both of them in; for all that he had a small cock his balls were every bit as big as Sheldon’s if not bigger, and she enjoyed the way they rolled around in her mouth and allowed her to enjoy the musky scent of his crotch. She sucked on them hard and pulled outward gently but insistently on the scrotum, just digging in ever-so-slightly with her teeth, as if intimating she wanted to take a bite.

Howard was gasping, and Amy could tell that he really wanted to cum; after all, who knew how long he’d been yanking his crank before she came along? She couldn’t make up her mind whether or not she wanted him to do it in her mouth; she briefly thought about just jerking him off, but he surprised her by pulling her off his balls and cramming his eager prick back into her mouth, pushing her head down so that she felt the tip begin to tickle her tonsils. She put one hand on his lean, muscular belly and cupped his balls with the other, which it seemed to her like he enjoyed immensely.

Now she began sucking in earnest, moving her head up and down rapidly as Howard began moaning louder and louder. He tensed and suddenly, before she knew it, he had crammed her head down as far as it could go and she felt a hot, warm fluid spurt into the back of her mouth.

She choked and spluttered, and even started to gag; it came out in a thick gob and tasted terrible, and she could even smell it in the back of her mouth! But a determination came over her; Suck it up Amy. Be a big girl she remonstrated herself. Rather than spit it out she filled her mouth with saliva, going down as deeply on it as she could and allowing Howard to press her head down as hard as he wanted. She swallowed the mouthful and kept working her head up and down while still holding the base of his prick in between her lips. Howard groaned as loudly as the actor on TV and twitched; a couple of brief, small spurts later and he was done, relaxing as completely and rapidly as one of those plastic toys with the string in the base that you could make stand up or collapse into a pile just by pushing the bottom with your thumb.

Amy was in no hurry to pull it out, now that he was done; she was still incredibly turned on herself, and still faintly in disbelief that not ten minutes ago she had parked the car in the driveway expecting to drop off the medicine and go, and now here she was, sopping wet and horny having just given her first ever blow job…to Howard Wolowitz, of all the men on earth.

It’s like blowing Bilbo Baggins, she thought to herself, and smiled with Howard’s softening cock still in her; she thoroughly cleaned off all the remaining semen and saliva with her tongue, swallowing it before letting his cock slip out of her mouth and plonk down onto his warm ball sac. She looked up and smiled at Howard, who was looking down at her in what appeared to be confusion. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

“Well that was…thank you?” Howard said, almost like a question, and laughing a little in surprise. The porn music in the background got louder, as did the groans of ecstasy. Amy looked around to see the blonde now riding the man’s face. Just like I did to Penny out in the playhouse here a few weeks ago, she thought wryly, and realized that she was still ferociously randy.

“Thank you, nothing,” she said flatly, winking at Howard to let him know she was kidding. “How’s about returning the favor?”

Howard seemed surprised. “Sure?” he said, after a second’s hesitation.

“You don’t seem so sure…”

“No, great, Amy--I’ll be happy to. Bernie won’t be home for hours. Lemme just go give Halley her medicine and I’ll be right back down. Thanks for bringing this, by the way,” he said with genuine gratitude.

He hopped up and jogged across the room; Amy found it surprisingly cute to see his skinny little ass jiggle as he ran. Human chicken wing indeed, as Raj had once described him to her. When he got to the base of the stairs he stopped, turned at the waste and exaggeratedly pointed at Amy. “Don’t go anywhere,” he said in what Amy thought might be an Elvis voice, and she giggled as he loped up the stairs.

While Howard was gone she stood up and stripped the rest of her clothes off, and headed to the downstairs bathroom to clean up a bit. She was slightly embarrassed at the copious flow from her twat, but decided what the hell? Guys didn’t have to be ashamed of having a boner, why should she be ashamed of having a…girl boner? She laughed at the thought, got a glass of water from the kitchen and returned to the couch.

After she sipped her water, she lay with her back propped up against the arm of the couch and spread her legs, enjoying immensely the wanton feel of being buck-naked, sprawled out and waiting for Howard fucking Wolowitz to come and give her head. It made her laugh again; she fought down a brief twinge of guilt (boy but alcohol was good for that!) and decided that if Bernadette were so blasé about Howard and Raj jerking each other off, maybe it wasn’t such a big deal what she and Howard were doing? After all, what’s a little oral sex between friends? she mused. The bigger picture—her frustration and actual sadness at feeling neglected by those she loved most—she set aside for the moment.

She heard Halley briefly squawk, and what sounded like Howard crooning a soft lullaby. Geez, I’m gonna lose that girl bonerof mine if he doesn’t get back down here soon, she thought, and she turned her attention to the porn on TV. The blonde was now bouncing up and down on the man’s schlong, looking for all the world like she was going to squash his balls flat, but Amy still found it enticing and started rubbing her clit, wanting to stay warmed up for Howard. It wasn’t long before she heard his feet on the stairs; he was wearing boxers with a pattern that Amy couldn’t see in the dim room.

“Well well, my lady, how fetching you look this evening,” he said in a corny voice.

“Just get over here and help a girl out, will ya?” she laughed, and Howard leapt enthusiastically onto the couch. In a second his head was buried between Amy’s thighs and he went to work.

Amy groaned loudly at his first touch; right away she could tell that he knew what he was doing, which was a nice surprise. Still, she thought, Bernadette was such a dominant bitch that she was sure Howard had had plenty of practice. Amy was extremely wet and he lapped at her greedily, flicking and nibbling and sucking her clit like a pro. Amy knew it wasn’t going to take her long to cum; she didn’t want to draw this out. It had been weeks since she’d last cum, she was horny and she wanted to get off.

She watched the porno on the tube. She had masturbated to porn a few times but by and large it wasn’t really her thing, except when the mood occasionally struck her; she had a secret account at an adult bookstore all the way out in San Bernardino. But she’d never gotten to enjoy it while someone else was pleasuring her, and she soon warmed to the idea. She closed her eyes and alternately thought about Penny, or Sheldon, or even Bert, (which was new for her), and then opened them to watch whatever was playing out on the screen.

Lying here on the couch, watching porn in the dark, with her legs spread just as wide as she could spread ‘em with her friend’s husband going down on her—she felt so deliciously sleazy that it made her smile and she knew she was ready to cum.

Just as she was about to ask him to do it, Howard stuck two fingers inside her and began a steady, rhythmic fingerfuck, sucking Amy’s clit into his mouth as he did so. He was so gentle, yet insistent and firm. Wow, this is much better than I expected! Amy started to undulate her pelvis, and now it was she who was grasping the back of Howard’s head and pressing his mouth down onto her. He arched his hand and found her g-spot quickly and soon Amy was going wild, groaning and thrusting and then she exploded in a fierce orgasm, crying out and mashing Howard’s head down onto her as she arched her hips. Finally she collapsed back onto the couch, breathless as Howard slowly sat up.

“Yeaah…” he said in his corny voice, and Amy laughed as she lay there catching her breath. Here I am, sprawled out, naked as a jaybird in front of Howard and I don’t even care, she thought. What does that mean? Should I be feeling guilty? Maybe, she conceded to herself. But right now she just felt good; calm and relaxed, and she put any negative feelings aside.

Eventually she sat back up as Howard clicked off the porn, and he handed Amy her clothes and left the room while she got dressed. What an unexpected, gentlemanly gesture she thought, and when she was all squared away Howard came back from the kitchen; he had two beers in hand.

“Thirsty?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” said Amy. “I had a few drinks with Bert, but…”

“With Bert?” Howard interrupted. “My my, you are making time tonight.”

Amy laughed. “No; nothing like that. I just ran into him randomly when I was having a drink after work.”

They sipped their beers in silence for a moment; she was hot, and the beer was nice and cool. Howard picked up his phone, held in the button and said “Play Neil Diamond,” and before long the soft strains of ‘Love on the Rocks’ were coming from the speakers.

Amy smiled. “Do you remember the scavenger hunt? You and I had a lot of fun together.”

“Totally,” replied Howard. “You know…I really felt we were starting to get close that day…really getting to know and maybe even like one another. Whatever happened? We never did go see Neil like we were planning.”

“No, we didn’t.” Amy got serious for a moment. “I guess I don’t know what happened…the best laid plans, and all that.”

“Yeah, I guess so. Well, even then I never expected that we would get to know one another this well…” he trailed off suggestively, giving Amy a raunchy wink. “Think we’ll do it again?” he asked abruptly.

“I don’t know…I really don’t want to think about it too much or I’ll start feeling guilty, and I don’t want that right now. But if you’re pressing me for an answer, I’d say probably not. It’s easier to justify if it’s a weird, one-time thing. You’ve gotta know I didn’t plan on this.”

“Me neither. In fact, I didn’t get Bernadette’s text about you coming over until I was upstairs giving the medicine to Halley, which is kinda weird. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have been slapping my kosher salami when you came over.”

“Well, the door was open,” said Amy.

“Blame it on Bernie. Just know that if you ever want to…revisit this situation, I’m glad to. Bernie and I have a sort of don’t ask, don’t tell policy when it comes to certain things. She can be surprisingly kinky for a Catholic school girl. She’s not very good at giving head though…she doesn’t like it much.”

Amy was intrigued. “Really…you two have an…open door policy?”

“Like I said, it’s don’t ask, don’t tell. I’m not sure how much Bernie…steps out. Maybe she does, maybe she doesn’t. I think it’s more for my sake since she knows I’m such a horndog. I fool around occasionally, mostly with a pros…tate massager that I know,” he said lamely.

Amy knew he was about to say ‘prostitute’ but let it go. “That’s interesting. Well, just for future reference, Sheldon and I don’t have that kind of agreement, so please keep this to yourself. And I will too.”

Howard made a motion as if to zip his lips, and they finished their beers, listening to the music in silence.

Amy stood up. “Well, I’ve gotta go,” she said, feeling a bit awkward. She grabbed her purse and Howard came over to her.

“So what’s the protocol here…do old friends hug after they go down on each other for the first time?” he asked.

Amy smiled. “Sure,” she said, and Howard held her in a refreshingly chaste hug before she said goodbye and headed to the car.

As she headed back home after that brief, puzzling and yet delectable interlude, her head was buzzing with the simple fact that she’d finally given a man a blow job. And, to boot, someone besides Penny had just given her head. It was a satisfying feeling, and the guilt that was buzzing around the back of her head was staying low-key for now. She felt urbane, worldly-wise, like she had felt just after she and Sheldon had finally made love for the first time. Like she now got it—she got something that other people got—and hopefully not in the STD way, she grimaced to herself as she wondered just what Howard got up to with his ‘prostate massager.’

Still, he hadn’t asked to fuck her, and she was glad of that because she would’ve had to say no. Although she didn’t think Sheldon would appreciate the difference, giving and receiving oral didn’t feel to her exactly like cheating. Although where did that leave her with Penny? She wondered what lesbians thought of cheating, and virginity for that matter. Was it the emotions that made it cheating, or the physical act, or some combination of the two? She supposed that, as much as she didn’t want to admit it, be it with Howard or Penny, she was now cheating on Sheldon, and all her rationalizing wouldn’t make it go away. The thought made her sad, and more disappointed in herself than guilty; that was never how she had thought of herself, as a cheater.

But in addition to the guilt another thought was buzzing through her head—the fact that she had really enjoyed the sensation, and wanted to do it some more. Maybe not with Howard--but maybe not not with Howard? She filed that away for later too—but definitely with someone. She mostly wanted to do it to Sheldon, but he had made his opinion on the subject blisteringly clear the last time she had tried.

Was Sheldon somehow to blame for this? Amy felt more than a little jilted by him. He had opened up a whole new world of experiences for Amy, and at first, so afraid of losing it, she had agreed to whatever his terms were. Once a year? Fine. Twice a year? Even better. Once in a blue moon? Great. But it just wasn’t enough. She realized that you couldn’t force someone to have sex with you. If they weren’t in the mood, they weren’t in the mood. But Sheldon was almost never in the mood.

“It’s just…fucking unfair!” she blurted aloud, pounding the ceiling of the car with the side of her fist in frustration. Sighing to herself, Amy realized that a lot of days, she would just fuck all day if she could. Penny, Sheldon—whoever; in her more desperate moments she actually saw herself being not-too-picky. I guess blowing Howard proved that, she thought with a sardonic smile. The alcohol had definitely lowered her inhibitions, allowing her to get kinkier and feel bolder. For that she was grateful.

She buzzed right through a stop sign and hit her brakes. Speaking of alcohol she thought. I’d better slow down. She was actually getting a bit fuzzy around the edges; she had driven back past Ye Olde Grub Hub because she wasn’t paying attention to where she was going. In fact, a lot of the evening was starting to get hazy. It was almost like some delayed after-effect; maybe that last beer had been one drink too many for her. She knew she’d better get home; she was glad that no cops had been around when she’d blown that stop sign. By the time she got to the apartment she was feeling woozy, and she barely registered that Sheldon was still playing Halo and not in her bed when she crashed onto it and lost all consciousness.

Author’s Note: The Awakening of Amy Farrah Fowler

When I wrote the first chapter to this story I envisioned it as a one-shot; I basically just wanted to write some hot sex between Amy and Penny. However, as I got going I realized I had a much larger story to tell; it was primarily (though by no means exclusively) about Amy and Penny, or more specifically about what the two of them mean to each other, and it’s primarily (but again, not exclusively) told from Amy’s point of view. I didn’t know it was turning into a novel-length story the; the title is a bit trite, I know, but it does cut to the chase.

Amy and Penny are obviously a non-canon pairing, but someone even passingly familiar with the whole arc of the show wouldn’t have to read too deeply between the lines to intuit that something more is going on between the two of them; I believe that based on strictly canonical events, an ongoing sexual relationship between them is a valid and supportable subtext, an analysis I will go into at length in an author’s note when I’m done writing the story. For now, thank you for reading.
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The Awakening of Amy Farrah Fowler