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What Is and What Should Never Be	By : OpenPage Category: 1 through F > 21 Jump Street Views: 1336 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own 21JS or the characters. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. All characters and events in this story are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead is coincidental.

Chapter List
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Returning to school had not turned into the nightmare Tom had convinced himself it would be. Principal Cowan had agreed to let Tom return on a six-month probationary agreement on the proviso that he maintained a 2.5 GPA and stayed out of trouble. Surprisingly, Tom found that many of the students welcomed him back without ever alluding to his sexual orientation or the fact that he had beaten Jarrod Harris to a bloody pulp. Having broken up with Jarrod, Becca had once again begged Tom’s forgiveness and they slowly started to repair their damaged relationship by hanging out together with her friends. Tom refused her offer to tutor him, still not completely comfortable with spending time alone with her. Jarrod had returned to school several weeks later and had publicly apologized to Tom for his homophobic remarks. Tom was somewhat surprised but he later heard through the school grape vine that it was a condition of Jarrod’s re-admittance back to Lillydale High. Not long after Tom’s return, the school began to implement a tough, zero tolerance anti bullying policy, all of which made Tom somewhat of a hero in the eyes of those who had endured years of teasing just because their peers labeled them as different.
The downside to his return was that Tom started to struggle with his schoolwork, mostly due to sleepless nights and an inner turmoil at the prospect of facing his father. But he remained doggedly determined, spending night after night at the kitchen table, pouring over his books. He told Booker that he owed it to the Hendersons to do his best as they had refused to give up on him and he did not want to let them down again. Henry and Louisa had discussed with Ernest Cowan Tom’s desire to find his brother and the Principal agreed to give Tom special leave so he could return west and reconnect with his sibling.
As the time drew nearer for his and Booker’s journey, Tom found himself becoming nervous and agitated. To find Doug he needed to contact Aaron and the thought made him physically sick. Memories of his rapes came flooding back and he frequently suffered horrendous nightmares. Many nights he woke screaming, his body drenched in sweat as he fought off an imaginary attacker. Booker had wanted to confide in Henry and Louisa in the hope of getting Tom some psychological help but his young lover refused, too ashamed to admit that he was once again unable to cope. Dennis did his best to comfort Tom but he felt ill equipped to deal with the level of emotional scarring Tom suffered from. All he could do was hold his lover in his arms night after night and reassure him that he would never let Aaron hurt him again.
A month after his arrest, Tom stood on the platform of the train station, nervously chewing at his fingernails. Booker stood a few feet away, chatting to Henry and Louisa. The elderly couple had insisted on driving the boys so they could see them safely on the train. Glancing over at Tom, Booker could see the dark smudges under his lover’s eyes, a sign that he had not been sleeping well. It broke his heart to see his beloved Tom in such a distressed state and he hoped that the meeting with Tom’s father would not prove too much for his boyfriend to cope with. Dennis’ greatest fear was that Tom’s fragile emotional state would crack under the stress. It was a bittersweet situation, Tom and Doug would be together again but the only way it would happen was for Tom to face up to Aaron.
As the train pulled into the station, Tom’s eyes darted over to where Booker was standing. He had already said his goodbyes to Henry and Louisa, knowing that he would be unable to contain his emotions and not wanting to make a public spectacle of himself. He watched as the elderly couple gave Booker a hug and he managed to raise his hand in a quick wave before quickly turning away and stepping onto the train. He felt an arm around his waist and turning, he saw Dennis give him a reassuring smile. “Okay baby?” Booker asked softly.
Tom nodded, not trusting himself to speak without crying. They walked down the corridor in search of their sleeper. They would spend two nights on the train and Booker had suggested that it would be in their best interest to have a bed to sleep in rather than try to sleep in a seat. He was concerned about Tom’s nightmares and wanted privacy so he could console his lover if necessary.
Opening the door, they maneuvered themselves into the tiny space. The room consisted of two beds, one above the other, a toilet, sink and shower. The lower berth converted into a couch and there was room underneath to store their two bags. Booker tossed his holdall onto the upper bunk before taking Tom’s bag from him and placing it on the lower berth. He waited for Tom to speak but his lover stood mutely, staring into space with a dazed look on his face. Booker placed his arms around Tom and pulled him into a gentle hug. It took several moments before Tom wrapped his arms around Dennis and rested his head against his chest. Neither boy spoke for several minutes until Booker pulled away just enough so he could tilt up Tom’s chin. He brushed aside Tom’s long bangs so he could gaze into his dark brown eyes. “You know I won’t let him hurt you, right?” he murmured as he stroked Tom’s face. “We find Doug and we leave, end of story.”
Managing a weak smile, Tom nodded. “Okay,” he muttered as he picked up his bag and threw it onto the floor before lying down on the lower bunk and turning to face the wall.
With a sigh, Booker pushed both bags under the bed and climbed onto the top berth. He heard the drone of the train’s engines starting up and he looked at his watch. It was only six-thirty in the evening but it appeared that Tom had settled down for the night. Clambering back down, Dennis opened his bag and pulled out his book before again settling himself on the top bunk. As the train slowly began to move, he hung his head over the edge of the bed and peered down at Tom. There was no movement from the lower bed so he lay back down and lost himself in his novel.
**
Booker jerked awake, the sound of Tom’s screaming ringing in his ears. Disorientated, he fell from the top bunk onto the floor, the impact knocking the air from his lungs. Groaning, he stood up and rubbed at his elbow as he limped over to Tom, who was thrashing wildly in his sleep, screaming “NO! NO! NO! NO! NOOO!” Knowing better than to touch Tom and risk being mistaken as his attacker, Dennis sat on the bed and spoke Tom’s name repeatedly, telling him that it was okay and that he needed to wake up.
When Tom’s tortured eyes finally opened, Booker lay down and pulled his sobbing lover into his arms. “Shh Tommy, it’s okay, I’m here,” he murmured as he held Tom’s trembling body. It took nearly twenty minutes before Tom finally calmed down enough for Dennis to speak to him again. “Are you all right? Do you need anything?” he asked as he gently pushed Tom’s sweaty hair away from his face.
“Stay with me,” Tom whispered, “I don’t want to be alone.”
“Of course baby, whatever you need,” Booker replied before pressing his lips gently against Tom’s full pout. Tom responded immediately by opening his mouth, wanting Dennis to give him more. Booker kissed him slowly and tenderly as his fingers toyed with Tom’s hair.
“Make me forget,” Tom moaned into his lover’s mouth, pushing Dennis’ hand downwards.
“Tell me what you want,” Booker whispered huskily, desperate to help Tom stop thinking about what lay ahead.
“Play with me,” groaned Tom quietly, “Make me come.”
Shifting his position slightly, Booker unbuttoned Tom’s jeans and carefully pulled down the zipper before reaching inside his boxers and releasing Tom’s cock. As he caressed and tugged at Tom’s growing erection, he whispered in his lover’s ear, “Do you like that baby?”
“Yesss,” Tom hissed, as hips jerked upwards, “Harder.”
“Like this?” Booker murmured as his hand moved faster.
“Oh God!” Tom uttered, his pupils dilating with arousal. “Oh fuck!”
Dennis nibbled on Tom’s earlobe as he muttered, “Are you gonna come for me beautiful?”
“Oh Dennis I’m close!’ Tom panted as his hips continued to thrust into the air. “Oh please Dennis, harder!”
Smiling, Booker worked his fist over Tom’s erection. A minute later, Tom screamed as he shot his orgasm over Dennis’ fingers. Slowing his pace, Booker gently fondled Tom’s cock until it had softened. He stared lovingly down at Tom’s misty eyes and tenderly kissed his forehead. “Feeling better?”
Tom nodded, his expression now relaxed. “Stay?” he murmured, wanting to feel the reassurance of Booker’s body next to him.
“Always,” Dennis replied with a smile. “Now close your eyes and try to sleep, okay?”
Laying his head on Booker’s chest, Tom closed his tired eyes as the train steadily took him closer to the nightmare he would eventually have to face.
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What Is and What Should Never Be