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Carry On My Wayward Son	By : Danyealle Category: Supernatural > Slash - Male/Male > Dean/Sam Views: 6695 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I don’t own Supernatural, people with a lot more talent than I do have that honor. Nor do I make any kind of money off this story. I’m just playin’ with the boys. I promise to put ‘em back when I’m finished with them.

Chapter List
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Chapter 4

Yeah, what I've felt

What I've known

Sick and tired, I stand alone

Could you be there

'Cause I'm the one who waits for you

Or are you unforgiven too?

-Unforgiven II

-Metallica

(Tags: Masturbation, mentions exhibitionism/voyeurism)

Letting himself into the slightly classier than he was used to motel room, Dean tossed the keycard onto the table before sitting down the six-pack he was carrying. Stretching to work out the kinks, he winced as his still healing ribs pulled slightly. No, it wasn’t nearly as bad as it had been a week or so ago but if he moved just right it still hurt a little.

After finishing his stretch, he felt a little better and slumped slightly. Though it was still early, about 7ish or so, he had no desire to go out as he normally did when on a hunt or investigation. Right now, he just wanted to relax, have a couple beers, eat the pie he had waiting on him and talk to Sammy for a while. He found it rather ironic that now that Sam wasn’t around he wanted to talk to him more than when they were together. It was odd…

Sighing, he shook his head then hauled the six-pack to the mini ‘fridge and stuffed it in. After grabbing a bottle from it, he snagged the pie that was waiting there for him then made his way to the bed. Settling in, he snagged the laptop case then pulled it out. Wiggling around, trying not to move off the bed since he had gotten comfortable, he plugged the thing in then booted it up. After plugging the wireless card in, he surfed on over to the hunter’s website and logged in. He had put in a request to WaywardSon for information on Asmodeus. Earlier, he had gotten an e-mail saying he would post up what he could find as soon as possible. After navigating into the research section, he found a page labeled ‘Asmodeus’ but, after opening it, saw it said ‘coming shortly’. Well, at least the guy would probably post up soon if he had the page up. He didn’t know what it took to create a page like that, so it might take some time to get it all organized then loaded.

After taking a bite of his pie and a pull off the bottle of beer, he loaded up his messenger program to see if Sam was online yet. When he didn’t see his brother’s name, he navigated to a search engine and started seeing what else he could find on the half demon, half angel. Like last time he tried this, he found himself overwhelmed by the sheer volume of contradictory information that was out there. As Bobby had told him when he agreed to go do a bit of looking around for the massive evil that might be here, there was so much crap out there that it was hard to sort through. Quickly, he gave it up and checked Busty Asian Beauties for any updates while he waited for Sammy to pop online.

He was lost in his all time favorite site, wandering through the pictures and videos when he was startled by a sound. Quickly, his hand snaked under the pillow, touching the gun there, while he scanned the room. When he realized that it was just the heater kicking on, he relaxed, shaking his head. Of course the heater had kicked on, it was friggin’ COLD outside, he thought, giving himself a mental swat upside the head. He was just used to ones that made tons of noise was all so this one sounded strange.

Scrubbing a hand across his face, he shook his head. This whole Asmodeus thing had him on edge. It wasn’t a hunt, per se. It was more like he was gathering intelligence and seeing if he couldn’t find the demonic son of a bitch. From everything he was getting, to take this demonic bastard on, he was going to need help. Now, he was a damn good hunter, he knew that, but there were some things one didn’t try to gank on your own. Asmodeus was one of them. So, since Bobby had put him on the trail of the massive evil, he was seeing what he could find. If he could track the son of a bitch down he was going to get Cas’ help to take him out. Hopefully, the angel had the juice needed to do that because, from what Bobby had sent him and everything he had read, this was a powerful fucker. And, most certainly, one that didn’t need to be walking the earth. But, on top of that, the worst part was he didn’t have Sammy watching his back.

Honestly, there were issues between the two of them, that he would admit, and the trust wasn’t there like it used to be before he went to hell but he knew his little brother wouldn’t let anything happen to him. Hunting a badass like this, he needed that and it wasn’t there. This hunt, more than anything he had done since Sam vanished, drove that home. Sure, Cas was great but he wasn’t Sam and it was Sam he needed. Shaking his head, he sighed once more.

Since being back in communication with Sammy he had tried everything he knew to talk him into coming back or at least telling him where he was so that they could meet up but it hadn’t worked. His little brother was adamant that, for now, he wasn’t going to do that. No amount of anything he had tried worked, Sam wouldn’t budge. Of course, as would be expected, that drove him nuts. He wasn’t used to working this hard to get Sam to do anything! Usually, he knew how to go about things to get Sam to agree. But all the old tricks weren’t working this go ‘round. This all told him he had to go about it a different way but, for the life of him, he couldn’t figure out how to manage it. Instead, he had to resign himself to do something that he wasn’t used to; waiting and being patient. Sooner or later, Sammy would come around then things could get back to normal. But, until then, he had something he could do to see if he couldn’t figure out where his brother’s head was.

Since being in contact with Sammy online, he had taken to following him around under a fake name. No, he didn’t get much, he was no hacker and couldn’t get into things to find stuff out like he wanted, hell, he wouldn’t even know where to start to figure out what to do. But what he could do was create a fake name and follow him on messenger. That he had done.

Sam knew him by his normal handle, Renegade_Hunter. That was that name they talked under all the time. But he had another name, SexyStudlyNSmooth, that he created when he found out that Sam used chatrooms. Imagine his surprise one night, when playing with the new messenger program, he found that he could join his contacts in a chatroom if they were in one. What was an even bigger surprise was the fact that his brother was in a room catering to bisexual men. He had been far too curious to let that go so he had created the alternate name and managed to navigate himself into the room. Oh boy, had he gotten an eye-opener when he did that!

Going into a chatroom for the first time had been an interesting experience to start with… First of all, he had been bombarded with what he now knew were ‘troll PMs’ from fools that wanted to hook up for cybersex or do something on a webcam. It seemed that his name was like a magnet of some kind to that class of idiots. Quickly, with the help of some of the regulars in the room, he had learned how to block those morons. After that, he quickly deduced that Sam was apparently a regular in this chat and had been for some time.

The ones that had been around a while, and all seemed to know each other, called him SNL and talked to him like an old friend. That was fine with him, he had just sat back and watched to see what he could learn. The next surprise was one that had floored him. It seems that his Sammy had known since he was a young teen that he was bisexual. In fact, Jess was apparently more of an aberration than a rule for him. He, from what he said, preferred men. Sure, he went out with women but admitted one night that was more for show than anything else, to keep people off his back, meaning him of course. Honestly, he hadn’t known what to think about that. And there was some guilt involved that his brother felt that he couldn’t tell him something like that. Hell, he would have accepted it! But, from hearing Sam ‘talk’ about it, his brother didn’t know what his reaction would be. Now, dammit, that hurt! But, on some level, he could understand it. After all, he was known as the ladies man and hadn’t ever said much about whether that was something he would accept or not. Hell, he could be damn judgmental when he wanted to be. So Sammy, apparently, hadn’t been comfortable saying anything to him. He didn’t like it but could understand it to an extent. Shit, if he had known, it wouldn’t have mattered. But, now, he had no way of bringing it up without giving away what he was doing. He just hoped that Sam would say something at some point and he could segue into it. He was also beating himself over the head slightly for pushing him all those times to end up with some woman or another. At the time, well, he had thought he was doing him a favor. Now, shit, he just felt bad about it! It must have been uncomfortable for Sammy to have women shoved off on him when he preferred the opposite sex. Well, he knew better now and wouldn’t make that mistake again.

Though all that was a shock, a big one, he would admit that, but the worst was yet to come. After a couple days of hanging around and not acting like a damn troll, the regulars in the room had accepted him and spoke fairly freely about things, trying to include him in stuff since he appeared to be ‘normal’ like them and not an idiot that was there to just get their rocks off. That was fine, he wanted to blend in and that was perfect. He could hear conversations over the voice part of the chat, relishing in hearing Sammy’s voice though he wouldn’t turn on his mic since it would be a dead giveaway as to whom he was. It was great just to listen to things then type answers in the room. It was his assumption that this was pretty much all they did. That was cool with him, he actually found it a bit enjoyable, like talking to a bunch of friends gathered somewhere. Actually, it wasn’t as if all they talked about was sex as he had first assumed when he started coming into the room. Hell, that was just a tiny part of everything. From what he saw, the group talked about everything from sports, to the weather to politics and everything in between. He actually liked and enjoyed joining in. Then, like the 4^th night he was in there, Sam said he was going to turn on the cam.

Since he had seen his brother on the cam before, he thought nothing of it. When Sam PMed his ‘hiding’ name and asked if he wanted to see, he was all for this. In a way, he saw this as getting a better understanding ofhis brother because he was seeing him in a light he hadn’t before. That was cool with him and he went for it. What he WASN’T prepared for was the fact that his brother was going to put on a ‘show’ for the ‘regulars’. That ‘show’ included him being butt naked and jerking off. When the robe had come off and Sam was there in all his naked glory, he had about swallowed the entire damn bottle he had been drinking out of! All he could do was stare at the stupid screen with his mouth hanging open, gibbering like a friggin’ moron, blushing so hard he felt like his face was on fire! But he had been unable to pull his eyes away either. He SHOULD have turned it off and not watched, that’s what he SHOULD have done but was powerless to do so. Instead, he sat there like a damned fool and watched the whole thing, start to finish. Worse yet? He had a fucking hard-on when it was over. Hearing the ‘regulars’ talk about how it was a short show and no ‘toys’ were involved, he wanted to crawl in a hole then die but part of him wanted to see the other show as well. When it was over and he logged off for the night, he ended up jerking off to images of what his brother had done. That made him feel guilty as hell. Even now, that guilt was still there. But, worst of all, he couldn’t stop thinking about it, wanting to see more. He was going back to hell, he was sure of it, and this was going to send him there but he couldn’t stop.

Shaking his head, trying to rid himself of the thoughts of what he had seen, he tried to find something to keep him busy. Pulling up messenger, he double checked to make sure he was on his Renegade name. When he saw he was, he sighed and minimized it again then began to fart around with the solitaire game while he waited, thoughts bouncing around and going to all kinds of places, some of them to things he didn’t want to think about.

After coming in for the night, well after dark had fallen, Sam warmed up the meal he had bought in town after running errands then sat down at the computer to eat it and enjoy a cold one while he did some work. He had gotten Dean’s request for information in the morning, before he had to take off and got the page ready, all he had to do now was upload it. Then he could start slugging through all the damn e-mails he was sure were waiting on him.

After rebooting the ‘beastie’, as he called his computer, he logged into messenger, smiling when he saw Dean’s name. Not a minute after he appeared online, just as he was logging into the admistrative panel of the site, Dean PMed him. Grinning, he shook his head then typed in, ‘hey, bro!’ as he logged in and got to work uploading the information he had on Asmodeus.

Grinning himself, Dean quickly did the hunt and peck thing sending the message, ‘get your mic on, Sammy-boy, I ain’t typing this shit out!’

Rolling his eyes, Sam stuck his headset on then turned on the cam before sending an invite to video chat. Within seconds of it hitting Dean’s end, he had accepted and they were ‘live’. Laughing, Sam said, “A bit impatient, Dean?”
“Fuck that, bitch! I’ve been waiting for over an hour for you to get your ass online,” he said with a smile, taking a swig of his beer.

“I had to do some grocery shopping and run a few other errands,” Sam explained, distractedly as he started uploading the page he needed to the site. “You should have gone out or something. You know I’m usually on late.”

“Not in the mood, Sam. Too much going on,” Dean told him with a sigh. “Besides, it’s a friggin’ cold-ass night.” Shifting around slightly, Dean stared at the screen, watching the look of concentration on Sam’s face. “What’s got you so distracted, geek boy?”

Unable to help himself, knowing that he was going to let the cat out of the bag, having fully intended to do so by now, he grinned then replied, as he began the upload process, “I am getting that page on Asmodeus ready for you. Give it a half an hour or so and it should be done.”

“Hey! That works!” Dean replied enthusiastically, nodding his head. It took a full minute for what Sam said to sink in though. “Wait a minute?!?!?! You mean that site is YOURS? You’re WaywardSon? What the hell, Sam?”

Smug look on his face, Sam nodded as he continued working, “The site’s mine, Dean. I came up with the idea. When I told Bobby, he thought it was great so we charged the domain name and other things to one of his credit cards then I’ve run it from there other than his referrals.”

“I gotta admit, Sam, it was a damn good idea! It’s been a lot of help.” Dean praised, more than slightly impressed that Sam had come up with such a useful tool for all those that hunted these assholes. “Now, onto this Asmodeus thing… You have some good info for me? I’ve just been finding nothing but shit on him that is so contradictory that I want to punch something,” Dean commented, looking intently at his distracted brother on the screen.

“I’ve got you all kinds of stuff, Dean, trust me. Bobby and I worked on the research for it, so you’re good. How much help it’ll be… I don’t know,” Sam said, running a hand over his mouth as he double checked everything on the page to make sure it was right. “There is also every sign and such I can find of him, what he might be doing and stuff like that. It should help.” Along with that, he was wondering what exactly he should tell his brother about what he knew of the connection between Asmodeus, Azazel and Ruby. Dean needed some of that information but he didn’t want to give too much away.

After setting the page to upload, he leaned back in his chair and looked at the screen. Seeing Dean there, drinking a beer, he smiled slightly. “Alright, Dean, I have a couple things I know that aren’t on that page.” He decided to tell him part of it, leaving the whole Ruby bit out, for now anyway. “It’s nothing I can prove, mind you, but I’ve run it by Bobby and he agrees with me.”

Sobering up, Dean nodded then said, “Hit me with it.”

Slowly, while eating his food, he walked him through what he thought was the connection between Azazel and Asmodeus, giving him what little he had found on it and the suspicions he had. When he finished he said, “Look, I don’t have real proof of this but it’s a gut feeling that it’s right and there is evidence that leans that way. There also may be a chance, with the color that Azazel’s eyes were, that he and Asmodeus might be related.”

Digesting everything, Dean nodded, “It sounds plausible, Sammy. Can you e-mail me what you have on it?”

“Sure, will do, Dean,” Sam nodded, making a note to do that.

“Now, about this related thing… tell me what eye color has to do with that,” Dean said, settling back.

“With some help from a couple people that Bobby set me up to talk to, I sussed out what the eye color on demons means.* Black, as we know, were once human. They could also be some very low level imps that have next to no power. They are the bottom end of the scale though some have a great deal of power on their own but they are nothing compared to the other classes,” Sam explained, pulling up the notes he had taken on this. “On the other end of things, you have the ones, like Lilith, with white eyes. That’s the very powerful ones. They are either the angels that fell with Lucifer or beings that were created by God. Next lowest on the scale are the red eyed ones. Those were parented by the white-eyed ones and either another white-eyed or angel. Below that are the yellow-eyed ones. They were created by either a white or red eyed with either a human or a black-eyed demon. Either white, red or yellow are some powerful beings, Dean, and something you need to take great care around!”

Nodding soberly, Dean replied, “Gotcha, bad mother fuckers. Let me run this by Cas next time I see him to check it out. If it’s right, I’ll let you know.”

“That’s fine,” Sam said dismissively, not liking that Cas would be involved at all since he didn’t trust him. But it was probably going to be the only way that theory would prove out. “I’ll also send you some other stuff I have that might help but I have no way of proving.”

“Anything you got will help,” Dean confirmed before grinning. “You’re still obsessed with the research, Geek Boy, thankfully. Better you do this shit than me.”

“I want to try to be some help even though I’m not around,” Sam told him, taking another bite of his rapidly cooling food.

“Well, if you would just let me know where you are, you could be of more use, you know. I could come get you and we could do this together,” Dean needled, knowing, by now, just what the answer would be.

Rolling his eyes, Sam replied, “Not right now, Dean. Can we talk about something else please? I don’t want to argue with you.”

Shaking his head, Dean chuckled, “Alright, let’s find something else….” It wasn’t that he was going to give up on getting his brother to come back but he knew getting into an argument over it with him wasn’t going to succeed. He would bide his time then strike when the time was right.

It was well after midnight when Sam logged off messenger for the night. He was exhausted and it had been a long, tiring day but he felt better after talking for hours with Dean. Though he wanted to go to bed, there was something else he wanted to do before that could happen.

Finding the documents he needed, he quickly e-mailed them to Bobby. He had been working on what the seals were, what order they needed to be broken in and such. There was also a bunch of stuff on the hierarchy of the angels. By now, he was pretty sure about who Castiel answered to and, if he was right, it scared him, knowing it meant nothing good for either him or Dean. Since this was stuff he didn’t want Dean to know about, he had to wait until they were done talking to shoot the e-mail. Actually, he had wanted to talk to Bobby about it but it was far too late to call him. So, he made sure to tell the old hunter to call when he got a chance.

After finishing that, he rubbed his eyes and shut the computer down. Swallowing the last of the beer, he tossed the empty in the trash then stood, stretching. Rolling his neck, he gave a soft sigh when it popped, some of the tension leaving it.

After walking into the bedroom and stripping down, he climbed into bed and shut the light off. Finding the sweet spot on the mattress, he curled up and shut his eyes, a small smile turning up the corners of his mouth. Honestly, though there were still problems between he and his brother, he felt as though he were getting to know him all over again by just spending time talking. They normally didn’t do that when they were traveling. When they got back together there were going to be issues, no doubt, but, maybe, this getting to know each other bit might help that.

Thinking over all they had talked about, Sam finally drifted off to sleep.

After logging off the computer and putting it up for the night, Dean turned off the TV, doused the light and settled into the bed. Shutting his eyes, he hoped to get some sleep but it wasn’t going to happen.

He found he enjoyed these talks with Sam a great deal. It was as though he was getting to know his brother in a way that he hadn’t before. Sure, they played games over the messenger thing as well, but most of the time they just spent talking about all kinds of things, not just hunting. He liked that. However, there was another problem that he didn’t anticipate.

Since seeing Sam’s ‘show’ he hadn’t been able to shake that image of him when they talked. In fact, he couldn’t, when he looked at his brother on the computer, help but flashback to what he had seen. In fact, tonight, once they got done talking about the ‘business’ end of things, he spent the rest of the conversation half-hard over it.

Rubbing his eyes and groaning, he reached down and squeezed his cock which had risen to more than half-hard as he replayed some of what he had seen that one time. Unable to stop himself, he shimmied out of his underwear and wrapped his hand around it then began to stroke, thinking about Sam, naked, and some of what they could do when they got back together. Though it was wrong, he knew that, and he shouldn’t, he couldn’t help himself. Picturing some of what could happen, he stroked faster, gritting his teeth and groaning. Hips lifting off the mattress, thrusting up into his hand, his eyes were screwed tightly shut as he panted heavily, sweat beading his upper lip.

At the thought of sinking his cock into his brothers ass, he let out a loud moan then came, spraying it over his hand and up onto his chest. Slumping back onto the bed, panting heavily, he felt the guilt once more wash over him. This wasn’t right and he knew it but was powerless to stop it.

After catching his breath, he went and cleaned up then flopped back down and shut his eyes, feeling the day finally catch up with him, dozing off shortly afterwards but not before the guilt made sure that he realized what he had done.

*The show never explained any kind of significance when it came to the eye color of demons. After reading the lore on demons, all I was ever able to come up with was demons had red eyes. So, to meld that with the show, I created this lexicon. It’s based on nothing more than eye colors that showed up and what I felt it could mean. It’s in no way canon.

Please review. My rabid plot bunnies from the lowest levels of hell love to eat them for midnight snacks! Thus getting the lil buggers to leave me alone for a short time!

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Carry On My Wayward Son