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Personification	By : rue37 Category: Supernatural > General Views: 2959 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
Part V

Epilogue
Now that the clerk is gone, there seems to be no need to
hurry.� Sam stands beside his hotel bed
and stuffs his dirty laundry in a thick plastic bag he keeps for this
purpose.� He�s wearing clean clothes now,
and shoes and socks for the first time since this ordeal began.� It feels good.� He�s trying to concentrate on that good
feeling, because there�s so much inside him that hurts like a mother fucker.� The sense memory of Dean�s fevered touches
can�t overcome the scalding remembrance of the rape � the bludgeoning to death
of all he�s thought inviolate.� The
shocking intensity of the pain that surrounds the memory surprises him.
Dean comes in from the car, where he�s already stowed his
duffel, and stands in the room�s center looking around as if he can�t remember
where he�s left some precious possession.�
�What are you looking for?��
Sam asks, voice cracking from disuse.
�I don�t know,� Dean admits.�
But Sam already knows.
Your
innocence.� Yourself, before the
clerk�s violation.
Too bad he can�t find that here.� Too bad neither of them can.�
�Let�s go,� he says instead.�
They turn to leave.�
The clerk is standing in the doorway.�
Sam�s knees go weak.�
He sits on the bed in shock, heart thudding painfully in his chest.� Dean�s entire body goes tense, and he takes
two determined steps toward her.� Sam
recognizes his posture as the one his brother gets when he�s about to wreak
violence.� But he stops himself, and just
looks at the clerk.
It takes Sam a moment to see what he sees.��
She�s changed from the stained blue smock she was wearing
earlier to a white, baggy t-shirt, and clean black
slacks.� Her hair is combed and pinned to
the sides of her head like the schoolgirl she must have been once.� She looks � harmless.� Is harmless, he realizes abruptly.
�I want to be angry with you,� she says in a thick
voice.� �You�ve taken everything from
me.��
They watch her.� Sam
can�t quite believe the changes he�s seeing, the air of normality and helpfulness that surrounds her now.
�I can�t be angry, though.�
I can�t hate.� The things I did �� She trails off, and
Sam swears the expression on her face is regretful.� �My power has changed now.� I can�t do the things I could before.� The things I did to you.�
The silence between he and Dean is
like a black, yawning hole.� She ventures
into it.
�But I can do one thing to make it right.��
She comes forward.�
Sam forces himself not to pull away, but to stand strong.� Dean watches them both like he doesn�t know
whether to attack her or grab Sam and tug him out the door.� Sam�s kind of surprised he isn�t doing one or
the other.�
When she reaches out and touches Sam�s cheek, though, the
world recedes and he can no longer think about his headstrong brother.� A tingling warmth is
spreading out all over his head, sinking deep into his skull, saturating his
brain.� It�s wrapping around the memories
of everything that has gone on � the horror of their imprisonment, the pain,
guilt, and trauma of the rape, and the sucking away of their strength.� But instead of letting those memories
continue to flare and burn, she pats them down with a bucket of metaphorical
water, and quenches them.� Their stabbing agony drains away into a muted
throbbing sting, then drains further until he can�t feel them at all.� They still exist, but they�ve faded into the
distance like a wound that is scabbed over and healed, vaguely unpleasant but
no longer sickening.� As
though he�s over it � past the horror and into the future, with a necessary
stopover in the miraculously painless present.
When she turns to touch Dean�s cheek as well, he flinches,
emotions warring on his face: hate and anger and the desire to kill, torch,
burn.�
�Let her,� Sam urges.�
He swallows, locks eyes with his brother, but stills
himself.� Sam�s heart aches at Dean�s
trust.
In the next moment, Sam literally sees the agony drain from
Dean�s eyes, sees the way his body releases the pent-up tension and rage.� His head falls back and his eyes flutter
closed.� When he raises his head and
opens his eyes, it�s like a black shroud has been torn from his body.
---
Afterward, Sam asks her, �Your name.� Your human name.� What is it?� His voice is steady, his tone
curious.�
The clerk thinks about her human father.� He raised her; loved her as best he
could.� It wasn�t his fault that she
could only think of becoming like her mother.�
The name, though.� That had seemed
like adding insult to injury.� Her mouth
twists in irony.� �Angel.�
�Yes, it would be,� he says wryly, and turns those deep
green eyes on her.� �Go, then.� Leave this place.�� He smiles suddenly, a little sadly.� �Be one.�
You�ve been a devil long enough.�
She knows he�s right.�
She has to leave this place and act in accordance with her new
power.� Her power is different now.� Transformed into something
good and pure.�
She has to use it.�
She has a lot of choices, now.�
But that is something she�s never had a choice about.
---
They stand outside by the Impala, watching the last colors
of the brilliant red sunset die away.�
They both know it�s time to move on, but Dean seems to need to say
something first.� Sam gives him time.
�So,� Dean says finally.�
He�s using the voice that he thinks sounds casual.� �Where do we go now?�� He won�t meet Sam�s eyes.
Sam regards him, thinking at first that his brother is
talking about the road they should take.�
Then he realizes what Dean�s really asking:� Can they go back to being �just brothers,�
after what had been done to them?� After what they did voluntarily?� It�s a good question; luckily it�s one he
doesn�t have to think about too much.
�Anywhere we want,� Sam says confidently.� He means it.�
�Anywhere.�
Dean finally meets his eyes.�
He takes a deep breath, looking less tense than he has for days.
�Okay,� he says.� He
doesn�t go on with, I believe you.
But Sam knows he means it.�
And he knows that Dean�s comment is right as rain.
They don�t have to wait any more to be okay.
They already are.

End
- 4
- 5
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Personification