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Whiskey Under The Mistletoe	By : OnyxWildcat Category: Supernatural > Het - Male/Female Views: 1665 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own anything that pertains to the Show Supernatural. This is merely for non-profit entertainment for other writers/readers who enjoy the 'What If' pondering when thinking of Supernatural and all it's Supernatural goodness.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
Chapter Five

I was lying back on the queen-sized bed closest to the door when the boys finally walked back in. My jacket, shoes and blade holster were lying on the floor next to me as Dean closed and locked the door behind him. The look on their faces made me sit up.

�Onyx, have you ever considered medication?�

I blinked at Dean�s question. �You think I�m bipolar?�

Sam sat down on the edge of the bed. �You�ve gone through a few emotional extremes since you�ve been here��

�I�m female and strongly empathic. I�m overly sensitive to everything around me, and when I don�t vent like I should, I tend to have mood swings.� I said as if it explained everything but they weren�t convinced. Figures. �Add alcohol to the equation and I�m going to react more impulsively.�

�Try psychotic.� Dean muttered under his breath and earned a glare. �Hey, I call it like I see it.�

�You�ve got some nerve, Winchester.� I growled and sat up straighter, my arms folded tight beneath my breasts. �You expect me to act rational after you tell me you not only want to have sex with me, but you want to be first in line because it�s your dying wish.� I said and felt the pain in my chest. �You both knew about this without even considering how it would effect me. How the hell am I supposed to react?�

Sam made his thoughtful scrunchy face and worried the inside of his bottom lip while Dean shifted uncomfortably on his feet. They both looked guilty.

�We�ve had a great thing going, just the three of us. Sure the thought of being closer to you two on a more intimate level has more than once crossed my mind, but I never wanted to complicate things.� I explained, my voice increasingly softer as I spoke. �I was worried of how it would effect you two as brothers if I mentioned I had feelings for you, both of you.� I sighed and looked down. �I didn�t want to cause a rift between you guys.�

They�d known I�d cared about them, but I doubt they knew to what extent. Well, now they did and I wasn�t sure what was going to happen. First off, the alcohol that made me relax had started to fade and secondly� I wasn�t sure I was up for just having sex with Dean just to appease his so-called dying wish. Call me childish, but no matter how much I loved him, I wanted it to mean something. I didn�t want to be another thing on his do-list.

And Sam�he was okay with it? Somehow that just rubbed me the wrong way. Sam was the first of the Winchester�s to approach me. He was interested in Me while Dean was off looking to get laid. Sam had always been the comforting warmth while Dean was the unmovable stone. They anchored me. They were opposites that fit me like two pieces of a puzzle I hadn�t known were missing in my life. Yet, I noticed a slight difference in Sam when he called me out of the blue recently. It was almost as though his energy wasn�t quite the same� As if something had changed in him but I couldn�t pin point it. Maybe when he was brought back�something went wrong. I don�t know, maybe I was overanalyzing this� But I couldn�t shake the feeling that something deep inside of Sam had changed.

The silence had drifted on as Dean went from standing close to Sam, to sitting on the other side of bed to my right. I didn�t look at either of them, I think I was just too embarrassed.

�You know Onyx�� I brought my eyes up to meet Dean�s solemn expression. �You don�t have to� We don�t have to��

�I know.� I said softly and could see how hard this was on Dean. It was hard on all of us.

�And� whatever decision you make, I�ll be okay with it.�

�We,� Sam added while looking to Dean and then brought his eyes to me. �We�ll be okay with it.�

Seeing the look on their faces and hearing the sincerity in their words� I didn�t know if I had it in me to say no. How could I? They were offering me the one thing I�d always thought about�and still I found a way to pick at it. Found a way to make it wrong, digging to see if I could find the imperfections and say, �Ah ha! See? I was right!� so that I wouldn�t find myself getting hurt. I don�t know if I could handle getting my heart broken� Not again.

�Guys�if I decide to do this, how will�� I didn�t get to finish my sentence when Sam interjected.

�I�d find something to do for a few hours.�

My brow quirked at the statement. �Find something to do? It�s Christmas and nothing is open. You can�t sit in the car either� Unless you�ve already booked another room.� Sam had the decency to look embarrassed. �Wow�you two really planned this one out, didn�t you?�

Sam ran a nervous hand through his hair as Dean coughed and shifted uncomfortably on the other side of the bed. Ain�t guilt a wonderful thing?

�Well, I guess you should get to doing whatever is you plan on doing, Sam.� I stated softly and felt my anxiety ripple through my spine.

�You sure?� Sam asked and I gave him a small smile.

�Yea� I�m sure.� I said and wondered if I was really ready for this�

They exchanged a look as Sam got up, grabbed his lap top and went for the door. He paused, �I�ll have my phone on me� You know, just in case.�

I nodded and watched as he hesitantly left the room and closed the door quietly behind him� Leaving Dean and myself�alone. Oh god�

I was looking off in the distance, focusing on nothing when I felt the bed shift followed by a wave of heat. I blinked and practically froze when Dean�s warm palm pressed gently against the top of my hand and carefully, entwined his fingers with mine. The gesture made me bring my eyes to his.

�You know that we don�t have to do this Onyx. I don�t want you to feel�pressured.�

I knew the faint smile on my face wasn�t all that pleasant. �It�s a little late for that, don�t you think?�

Dean let out a sigh of frustration. �Don�t do that.�

�Do what?�

�You�re acting like this is some kind of burden for you.� He said and shifted closer so he was facing me. �If you stopped picking at it for a second, maybe you�d realize that this isn�t just about sex.�

I wasn�t convinced. �It isn�t?�

�God damn it Onyx.� He grumbled and slapped his free hand to his forehead, took a deep breath and peered at me from under his hand. After a moment of searching my eyes he removed his hand from his face and said. �Fine, I�ll show you.�

�Show me wha�� I didn�t complete the thought when his mouth crushed mine and his hands found themselves on either side of my face, leaving me speechless. All the worries and fears I held inside were no longer existent as the weight of his kiss caused me to fall back against the stiff mattress.

And he was right� I felt it the moment his body pressed down against mine, his kiss a sweet and gentle thing� I could feel the energy of his body spill into me as though he were feeding me his soul from his very lips. I could feel it weaving into me, wrapping gently around the fibers of my heart and knew� This had nothing to do with sex. He was offering me something that I never could have asked for.

I returned the kiss with a silent fury and heard a deep rumble in response as his hands found their way to the bottom of my shirt. I arched my back as he pulled the shirt up and over my head and tossed it off to the side. His mouth moved from my lips to the nape of my neck and I shuddered as his hands expertly unfastened my jeans and started tugging. I let out a soft laugh as he sat up, removed his shirt in one swift movement and went back to pulling the snug jeans from my lower half. For a moment I lost all sense of myself at the sight of all those beautiful muscles working just beneath his tanned flesh when he got my feet free and tossed the jeans to the floor.

I turned bright red when I saw the look of pleasant surprise on his face. �Commando?� He mused and I felt the heat rising in my cheeks. His features softened as he leaned down, left a soft kiss on my lips and whispered, �sexy.� Before sliding off the bed. I watched him with curious eyes as he quickly unfastened his jeans, pulled them down and looked at me.

My eyes widened. �Oh�� Was all I could say as he stood there naked before me and apparently�very happy to see me. And I mean, Very happy.

Dean climbed back on the bed and very slowly, started to crawl towards me. He moved with a languid grace, as though dangerous in his own flesh, and as I laid there, I watched as his shoulders dipped and rolled making him appear like a large feline predator stalking toward its prey.

My breath caught in my chest as his hips pressed ever so gently against mine, the heat of him teasing me as his eyes peered down at me with a hunger I never knew he possessed. �Sit up.� He said in a low, deep rumbling voice and I had no other choice but to comply. Once I was sitting half way up, he leaned forward and reached an arm around, hand against my back. Before I thought to ask his fingers found the clasp in my bra strap and once again, expertly unhooked the strap allowing the material to cling loosely against my breasts. He helped me free myself of the barrier and dropped it to the floor next to the bed.

There we were, exposed for all to see and yet hidden from the world itself. A sudden feeling of terror spilled into my mind as I realized how utterly vulnerable I was. Dean must have seen it in my eyes because he brought his lips to mine in a tender kiss, as though silently reassuring me that I was safe.

�It�s okay�� He growled against my mouth and without warning, pushed himself forward, filling me with the very heat of his need.

A strangled whimper flew away from my lips at the sudden sensation of our bodies locked together. Dean let out a groan somewhere deep within his throat at the feeling of my body tightly clamped around him. I hadn�t meant to, but it had been a very long time�and, well�I was naturally tight to begin with.

A part of my brain couldn�t believe what was happening. Dean was above me, arms wrapped around me, his face buried in my neck as though he was trying to soak me in from the inside out. I felt the sting of tears and choked back a shaky breath. I couldn�t lose it now. Not when he was being so incredibly gentle. I didn�t want him to think I was freaking out when it was just my feelings trying to swell to the surface.

He brought his face to mine and peered into my eyes. That�s when my heart shattered. A tear, shimmering and bloated with emotion, spilled from his left eye and trickled a path of moisture down his cheek.

�Hey�� I said in a whisper, brought my hands to gently cup his face and pulled his head down to kiss the bridge of his nose, just between his brow. I closed my eyes, lips still lightly brushing his flesh and whispered, �it�s okay.�

�I�ve waited for so long�� His voice was a strangled growl as he brought his tear filled eyes to mine. �I should have told you sooner�� He said between a few feather like kisses and paused to catch his breath.

�Tell me what?� I asked softly as his right hand brushed the side of my face, his fingers like heaven against my skin.

A slow yet gradual smile began to devour the sadness in his face as it reached his eyes. �This.� Dean said in a whisper, brought his mouth to mine and my heart stopped. With just the slightest movement of his hips, he began rolling into me. The feeling of being filled wouldn�t have done it justice as he moved so carefully above me, as though wanting the ecstasy of our bodies rolling in and out of each other to be stretched on into an eternity. The delicious sensation of him so deep inside caused my legs to wrap firmly around his hips, urging him deeper�

He rose up just enough to flash a smile. �Let me savor you,� he growled in that husky voice and left a kiss on my chin. �Fill you,� he growled against my throat as his lips ventured to the big pulse in my neck. His teeth grazed the sensitive flesh causing a whimpered moan to escape me and whispered, �let me love you.� With that last growl his teeth sank home, not enough to draw blood, but deep enough to leave his mark and to unleash a flood of tears from my eyes.

Slowly he moved, hitting a spot deep inside no one had ever touched. His mouth against my flesh, biting, nibbling as he made his way from one side of my neck to the other. Eyes clenched shut, sensations overpowering me, I felt his lips kiss the tears away from my eyes and whimpered.

Dean�s hips stayed at a steady rhythm and I heard myself whimpering as he found the very spot that would throw me over the edge of oblivion itself. �Dean�� Was all that I could say as the swell of ecstasy started to build. Started to flood through me, choking my voice and leaving me to hold onto something solid, something real. If Dean wasn�t with me, guiding me through this sea of sensation� I would have drowned.

My body arched against him, begging for that sweet release, that beautiful moment of suspended reality only climax can bring� When his rhythm changed. It was deeper, harder, filling me in a way no one ever had, pressing me hard against the bed, our flesh slick with sweat, panting� Starving for sweet release.

It felt like an eternity had gone by when a small spark ignited my womb in a tickling wave of white hot fire. I gasped, dug my nails into his back and lost all sense of reality. My body went rigid as the first explosive waves of orgasm swept over me, through me, and seemed to fall back into Dean, causing his body to slam into me. The ecstasy crashed over us like some terrible storm of sensation slamming against some distant shore.

That�s when it happened�

A blinding surge of light erupted in the back of my skull as our energy�s rose and crashed against each other like too titans clashing swords. My mind swam, my soul roared and I could feel Dean�s power swim through me like a wave of warm velvet behind my eyes. I felt suddenly weightless�no longer empty but at peace�

He�d brought me heaven�

*****

My eyes fluttered open to the sight of Dean curled up in front of me� Sound asleep. I couldn�t help the smile on my face at how peaceful he looked. I sat up, pressed a light kiss to his forehead and slipped out of bed. Surprisingly, he didn�t move. Which meant I�d exhausted him. Good� He needed the break.

A little shaky on my feet, I managed to gather my clothes and snuck into the bathroom for a quick shower.

The heat of the shower felt good against my tired flesh, easing the tension from my shoulders and lower back.

Once sated, I got out, dried off and got dressed. Before I left the bathroom, I peered at my reflection and smirked. Except for the small bite mark at the hollow on the left side of my neck, I actually looked okay. Actually�I was glowing. I shook my head, flipped off the light and stepped back into the room. Dean was still passed out, the sheets tangled around his lower body, giving him an almost Greek god appearance. The thought made me chuckle as I crossed the room, grabbed my jacket and very quietly, made my way onto the patio for some fresh air.

Once outside I fished my phone out of my jacket and sent Sam a text to meet me out front.

Within about a minute of sending the message, I heard the familiar footfalls approaching me from the very end of the motel. I turned and gave him a smile. �That was fast.� I mused as he stood next to me, his big hands dipped into the pockets of his jacket. �I was almost afraid that you�d be asleep.�

�I couldn�t sleep.� Sam replied in a quiet tone and tried to hide his emotions from reaching his eyes. �You�okay?� He asked and I shrugged.

�Yea� I�m okay. I can�t say the same for Dean.� I said and watched a small glint of worry dance through Sam�s eyes. I chuckled. �He�s passed out.�

�Oh.� He said with a laugh and cleared his throat, the smile still playing on his lips.

I studied him for a moment, the lines in his face, the color of his hazel green eyes. I sighed, �you must think I�m awful.�

He gave me that long blink and furrowed his brow. �What makes you say that?�

�Sam, don�t play coy� I know it�s bothering you that�� I couldn�t finish the sentence. Not with the pained look in his eyes.

He searched my face for a moment and took a step closer to me, his eyes piercing. �Hey, we went over this remember?� Sam paused and took my hands in his. �I don�t think any less of you.�

Talk about a real mind screw. �I don�t get it.� I said and watched his brows knit together in question. �You guys planned this out, knowing it would screw with me� And you�re okay with it? Sam, don�t you think I�m disgusting?�

He shook his head and pulled me close to his chest, wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. �No baby, I don�t.� Hearing him say that made me bury my face against his chest, as though trying to hide myself inside the warmth of his embrace.

�After what I did�how could you want me.� I whispered against his warmth and felt him ease back enough to place his fingers beneath my chin and brought my head up to meet his gaze.

�Onyx, Dean and I�agreed that no matter what, we�d take care of you. Even if it meant��

�Sharing me?� I said the words he couldn�t and watched him give a slow nod. �When did this happen?�

�After the last time we all spent time together. I had brought it up� But we didn�t really discuss it until a few months ago.�

That must have been after Sam�s death and the deal Dean had made to save him. Interesting how a man�s perspective can change when he�s seen loss first hand.

�So� You�re both okay with sharing me�� A headache was forming behind my eyes. �God this is like an episode out of one of those 90�s programs on MTV.�

�Except without the drama.� Dean said from behind me and I turned my face to look at him. He gave me a lazy smile. �You okay with having us as your boy toys?�

When he put it that way� �What woman in her right mind, would refuse such an offer?� I said, mirroring the smile they shared and chuckled. �This has been such a weird Christmas.�

�You�re tellin� me.� Sam chimed softly and Dean snorted back a laugh.

�Oh and speaking of Christmas�� Dean began and motioned for me to take his hand. �I thought you�d like to know that The Grinch will be playing on Tv again in the next ten minutes.�

I walked forward and took the offered hand in mine, paused and offered my free hand to Sam. �You up for sitting on the couch?� I asked with a smile on my face and watched his eyes sparkle.

�Actually,� he took my hand and smiled. �That doesn�t sound like such a bad idea.�

Hand in hand, the three of us filed back into the room, took our places on the couch and enjoyed How The Grinch Stole Christmas.

And all I can tell you�is that it was the best gift a girl could ever ask for.

-The End-
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Whiskey Under The Mistletoe