Time

Takes place after Day 4, when Jack is in hiding.


One Whole Night (Gluttony)


I didn't have to fake tears at Jack's memorial service. For all intensive purposes, we were still burying Jack Bauer, even if he was still alive. He was as good as dead to the world. He was as good as dead to me, and knowing that he was still alive somewhere was hardly a comfort to me when I'd never see him again. There were so many doubts and what ifs in my mind, but I couldn't help but regret the months wasted, alone and wallowing in self pity, when I could have reached out to Jack and had so much more. Perhaps that's what made me lose my hold on the tears. Or perhaps it was his unintentionally broken promise, before he'd had to disappear. That he loved me, that he wanted to be with me, that he'd find a way. The idea of actually being with Jack, whenever I wanted, without hiding anything, was so beautiful to me in those few hours when he came back into my life. I think it was what got me through the rest of that day, at least up until the time where he had to disappear. What a short-lived dream that was.

With Jack gone, I went back to Michelle. Sometimes I hated myself for it, for it felt somehow like I'd finally, truly betrayed Jack, especially in that I'd already talked about it with her, kissed her when I really wanted to just go with him. Or maybe it was just my own feelings that I betrayed, the achingly hopeful joy I'd felt when he said he wanted to be with me. But I did care for her, still. Even after everything she did. And our relationship problems weren't all her fault, really. At least being with Michelle gave me a reason to keep living.


It surprised me when, around 6 months later, I received Jack's letter. Not his name or return address, of course. He was too smart, too cautious for that. In fact, I almost dismissed it as a piece of spam, as it appeared to come from one of those pyramid scheme financial service companies. 'Dear Mr. Almeida, Would you like to make your money work for you?' and all that bullshit. But something seemed off, to my mind that was used to looking for such things. And it closed with a handwritten note, handwriting that looked more familiar than it should.

"We always mean what we say. You can trust us, I promise.
- Nelson Johnson,
Everclear Financial"

I traced the form of the J on the signature with a finger, mind sorting back, trying to remember documents Jack had signed. Then I took a look at the content of the letter itself, and things fell into place. It was coded, one Gael had developed just for the three of us when Jack was in Mexico, to fall back on if all other forms of communication broke down. The letter contained an address, a date, a time, and what I assumed was room number. Nothing more, nothing less.

Just like old times. Definitely a message from Jack.

I found myself smiling, refolding the letter carefully and tucking it into my suit jacket pocket. A date a little over a week away. My mind was already formulating an alibi. I would go, there was no doubt about that, and stay as long as I could, as long as he would let me.

The time seemed to drag until the date the letter had specified, but finally I was in a tiny motel in another city, stomach in knots, praying I wasn't here chasing a dream. I knocked lightly on the door number, and heard a low reply, voice so familiar that it made my heart ache. "I don't need room service."

I wet my lips. "I'm actually here on behalf of Everclear Financial... we have this great offer to help Americans like yourself - "

Before I could finish, the door was open, and I was yanked inside, pushed up against the now closed door with Jack's body against me, lips tearing kisses from mine, warm and needy and trembling just a little. I gave a soft groan before I could stop myself, fingers clenching in his hair, in the back of his shirt, passion and desire rising to meet his voracity, until we had to stop just to draw breath.

"God, Jack..."

He gave a soft, breathless chuckle. "Hey Tony. Glad you made it."

"Wouldn't miss it for the world...." I let my fingers stroke through his hair, which was longer and more shaggy than I remembered, setting desire aside for just a moment to look at him. "I thought I'd never see you..." My train of thought derailed mid sentence. "You're a brunette."

Jack laughed again, pulling back and catching my hands to tug me further into the motel room, switching off the TV. "I know blonds are supposed to have more fun, but I think I've about used up my quota. Or at least, Jack's quota."

I pulled him against me, nuzzling his jaw, hands stroking over his chest, starting to undo the buttons of his shirt. "Who are you now?"

He smirked, pushing my jacket off my shoulders and starting at my shirt. "Daniel Buckner. Long distance trucker extraordinaire."

I laughed, wondering a little at his comparatively carefree demeanour, taking his face in his hands. "All right... who are you and what have you done with Jack?"

He smiled, hands reaching up to mirror my pose, leaning in to kiss me warmly, tip of his tongue flicking teasingly against my lips as he did so. "Just happy to see you again, Tony."

I let myself drink in his kisses, slipping one hand down around his waist, stroking his hips and the small of his back hungrily. "Missed you so bad...."

"Show me how much," he murmured, voice low and throaty, which sent a shudder of desire straight to my cock.

"All right," I replied with a smirk, pulling back, making a gun shape with the fingers of one hand. "Strip, or I'll shoot."

His eyebrows raised at my words, and he chuckled, pulling his shirt the rest of the way off and tossing it onto the second queen bed in the room, which already had his jacket and a duffel on it. "Ok, ok, I'll cooperate."

I grinned, watching him appreciatively as he undid his belt and jeans. "You'd better, or I'll go after that hot boyfriend of yours."

He really laughed at that, dropping his jeans and boxers, kicking them off along with his socks. "Oh, I don't want that. Just tell me what you want, I'll do whatever you tell me to."

I wet my lips, letting my eyes move over his body appreciatively. He was still just as fit as he'd been in CTU, though I wasn't too surprised. Even a cushy desk job at the Department of Defense hadn't left him out of shape. I leaned down to grab my coat off the floor, hand still forming a gun, watching him as carefully as if I was actually holding him up. There was a pair of handcuffs in my pocket from my security gear that I'd brought more on a whim than anything else, and I tossed them onto the bed, putting the keys on the bedside table. "Get on the bed and cuff your arms above your head to the headboard."

He eyed the cuffs for a moment, then picked them with a smirk, stretching out and doing as I asked. "Just don't leave me like this for the Chinese to find me."

I stripped my shirt off, crawling over him on the bed to make sure the cuffs were secure, leaning down to kiss him hungrily. "Don't worry, I won't give you over to the enemy. But I can assure you that this will be very, very torturous...."

He gave a soft moan against my mouth, arching up against me, grinding his thigh against my erection through my jeans. "God, you're not serious... it's been so long, Tony...."

I grinned and moved to sit back on my heels, by his feet. "I remember. I also remember that I didn't do a nearly proper job of things then, and I'm going to make up for it now."

"Oh, god..." A soft exasperated moan, but I ignored it, lifting one of his calves to press my mouth to the top of his foot, nuzzling pale skin, trailing slow, open mouthed kisses up to suck at his ankle, flicking my tongue at the sensitive skin just under it.

"Every part of you is mine, every inch belongs to me," I murmured softly, slowly working my way higher, fingers stroking his other calf in slow circles to mirror my kisses. I nibbled lightly at the inside of his knee, lavishing attention slowly over his skin like he was a feast meant only for me, wanting to taste and stroke and tease every part of him.

By the time I reached his inner thigh, he was hard, panting softly, squirming under me, tugging a little at the cuffs. "Come on, Tony...."

I grinned despite myself, letting my breath play against his cock, flicking my tongue teasingly against the head of it as he arched up closer to me. Then I pulled back all together, stretching out against his side and catching the cuffed hands in one of mine. "All in good time..." I murmured, leaning into nuzzle his palms, licking up the length of two fingers before sucking them into my mouth, teasing his fingertips with my tongue, dragging my teeth against his skin.

"Fuck - !" His hips bucked up against the air helplessly, as if it was his cock in my mouth and not his fingers, breath coming faster. "Tony, please..."

I smiled, but didn't give in, repeating the attention to each finger, then his wrists, slowly kissing down well muscled arms. I wanted him, wanted more than anything to take him right then and there, but I forced my need aside, needing to savour this, make it last, needing to tattoo the memory of his body onto my hands, my mouth, my mind. His breath came faster, almost whimpering in frustration, pressing his thigh harder against my hips in what I knew was an attempt to make me lose control, but I kept a tight hold on my desire. My hand stroked over his chest as I lowered my lips to his neck, kissing and licking a path down the tendons before sucking at the crook of his neck, lavishing the muscle leading to his shoulder with slow laps of my tongue, breathing in deep of his cologne. "My Jack...."

He gave a little breathless cry of aggravation, turning his body and angling his hips to grind against mine, erection pressed hard against my jeans. "Not going to be your Jack much longer if you don't fucking get on with it," he growled, then drew a sharp breath as I bit down at his neck, smacking his ass playfully.

"Patience is a virtue, Jack...."

"I am not a virtuous man, dammit," he growled, hips rocking sharply against mine, and I groaned despite myself. It had been so very long....

I slipped down to kiss his chest hungrily, sucking and nipping at his nipples as I yanked my jeans undone, wriggling out of them, drawing a soft hiss as the waistband of my boxers pulled tight over the head of my erection. Lube was next, two fingers slipped between his thighs to press inside him, pumping into him slowly, prepping him, and he bucked up against my fingers with a shuddering groan.

"Dammit, Tony, just fuck me!"

My movements now were almost clumsy with eagerness, body screaming for me to do as he said, fumbling the bottle of lube as I poured some out onto my palm and fisted it over my aching cock. I moved to kneel between his thighs, pulling his calves up to rest on my shoulders, then pressing the head of my erection into him slowly and giving him exactly what he'd asked for.

"Ohhh, god, Jack!" He was tight, so damn tight as I slowly rocked deeper, groaning at the hot pleasure it brought, fingers gripping his hips hard to hold him in place. It took every ounce of self control I had left not to pound into that tight ass, reminding myself very sternly that it -had- been a very long time, and though Jack liked it rough, I didn't want him useless for the rest of the night.

He shuddered under me, drawing breath in sharp, helpless gasps, fingers clenched on the bars of the headboard as he tried to rock up into me. "Yes! Finally - !"

"Yes..." I breathed, rocking a little deeper, letting my eyes fall closed for a moment just to savour it, the feel of him under me and around me, shivering, the throaty tones of his voice as he cried out in pleasure. Everything that was so familiar, so dear to me, so long craved for and withheld, and I felt my heart constrict painfully in my chest at the rush of emotion it brought. I'd missed this, more than I'd even realized up until this second, missed the intensity, the utter feeling of completion when I was inside him....

"God, please - harder!"

He didn't have to ask twice for that, my hips bucking deep into him of their own accord at his plea, and I watched him through narrowed eyes, drinking in the sight of him stretched beautiful and helpless under me, tugging helplessly at the cuffs, almost thrashing against the pillows. It made me ache with more than just desire, ache to own him entirely, to make every inch of his body and spirit sing with pleasure, make him belong to me.

I leaned down to him, bending him almost double, to claim those sweet lips, muffling his cries, echoing them with my own. "Uncuff me," he gasped, catching my gaze with a sudden vulnerability. "Please..."

I reached and fumbled for the keys on the bedside table, without slowing the rhythm of our bodies, managing to get one cuff unlocked. Then his arms were tight around me, not caring that one was still cuffed, fingers digging into my back with the most delicious throb of pain. "Oh god, Tony - !"

"Love you," I gasped, not able to hold it back any longer, burying my face in the crook of his neck with a shudder, and his fingers tightened on my skin. "Love you, love you, love you oh god, Jack - !" My voice was keening, hips snapping hard and fast into him, body shuddering against him, heat and sensation and the overwhelming feelings of -right- all building inside me like a storm, wild and uncontrollable, threatening to break free and take me with it. Our bodies bucked together hard and fast, searching, craving, reaching, needing this like oxygen, needing the pleasure and completion and so much overwhelming love. I knew him so well even after so long apart, could feel his body draw tight against mine, feel him ride the edge of ecstasy, and I drew back to kiss him desperately, crying his name against his mouth.

"Love you," He gasped, barely audible, and bucked up hard against me, body tight and shuddering as he came, hot and slick against my stomach. It pulled the storm inside me free to crash around me, both wild and tranquil, knowing bliss and pain and ache and desire and love, all at the same time, overwhelming me, locking out the rest of the world other than Jack.

His fingers didn't release their desperate hold on my back, the hard metal edge of the cuffs digging into my skin, and I felt him shudder under me as he struggled to catch his breath, gasps warm and moist against my hair. "Love you," he breathed again, and I lifted my head to kiss him, slow and deep and deliberate, letting my pulse slow, letting the world come back to me.

"I missed you, Jack," I murmured, and he smiled, breathless, fingers finally relaxing, one hand coming up to stroke gently through my hair.

"So much," he agreed, words a sigh against my lips. "Thank you for coming."

I smiled, easing away from him to let him lay comfortably with a soft sigh of regret as our bodies parted,finding the keys to the cuffs amidst the bedsheets and unlocking the other one from him, setting them aside. Then I curled around him, burying my face in his hair. The emotion that had crested during sex was still turbulent inside me, and it seemed almost trite to try and put it into words, but my lips moved of their own accord, words in a shuddering breath. "Love you so much, Jack."

He tightened his arms around me, fingers stroking my back slowly, comforting, as if sensing how overwhelmed I was by it all. "I know. Always known. Wish things didn't have to be this way." Slipping his fingers into my hair, he guided my mouth to his again, warm and gentle.

I sighed softly against his mouth, letting my forehead rest against his, eyes closed. "I... I really wanted to be with you, you know. That day when you asked me."

"I know," he whispered, kissing me again, trembling just a little under my lips. "I know, Tony. I'm sorry. I really wanted it too. I'm so sorry." He was silent for a long moment, blue eyes watching me when I pulled away, just a little, to look at him. Finally he spoke. "How are you and Michelle?"

I closed my eyes with a little shiver, feeling it all come back, the same gut wrenching guilt and regret I'd felt after he disappeared. "She's... good. I... I'm sorry, Jack."

He pulled back to look at me curiously. "Sorry for what?"

I swallowed, closing my eyes for a moment. "When you found me, when you brought me back to CTU... I had nothing. You gave that back to me, you gave me my life back."

He smiled, giving a soft chuckle under his breath. "I didn't do anything, you know that. I just... wanted to remind you who you really were. Your actions and ability spoke louder than I ever could."

"But you started that. You were the only one who didn't give up on me. Even when they thought I'd died in that explosion, they tell me. You were the only one who never gave up."

He brought his fingers up, fingers stroking slowly through my hair, along my jaw, and leaned in to brush my lips with his gently. "I know you, Tony. Too well to ever give up on you, not for any reason. Not ever."

I swallowed hard, barely managing a reply. "Thank you." I drew a few slow breaths, trying to control it all, pressing closer to him to take strength in the warmth and solidity of his form. "Jack... tell me you'll come back. Tell me I won't loose you again, that I can see you again. Michelle was the only one I could turn to when I thought I'd never see you again. I'm so sorry...."

"I know," He breathed again, arms tightening around me. "It's ok. There's nothing for you to be sorry about. And I will come back. I promise. Whenever I can, whenever it's safe."

I nodded slowly, voice rougher than intended as I spoke. "Do you have to go soon?"

He shook his head, barely perceptible, blue eyes smiling. "I'm staying here all night, if you are."

I let out a soft sigh of relief, holding him to me for a long moment, letting my mind ease, relax, be comforted by him. Then I drew back to give him a smile, pressing him onto his back as I leaned in to claim his lips again. It might just be one night, but it was one whole night with Jack, and I was determined not to waste a single moment. "Good... because I never finished what I was doing to you earlier."

He chuckled, low and throaty and beautiful, which further strengthened my resolution to return to my previous activities, and his hips rocked slowly against mine, sending warm waves of pleasure through me. "I'll forgive you, but as punishment, you're wearing the cuffs when you're done with me."

My smile widened as I leaned down to kiss his chest. "I can live with those consequences."

~~~~~~


I arrived home around 10 in the morning, later than I'd planned, but not so late that the office would be too worried. I parked the car and went inside to change, thinking about what Jack had said, and found myself smiling. I'd just passed the kitchen when I heard a voice that stopped me dead in my tracks.

"Morning, sweetie."

I took a few steps back to the kitchen doorway to see Michelle, nursing a cup of coffee over the newspaper. "Hey baby. You feeling okay? You're not at work...."

She smiled and nodded, but there was something about the smile that seemed off. It was genuine, but.... "I'm fine," she said. "Just wanted to wait for you to get back." She stood, and I moved into the kitchen to embrace her, kissing her hair, trying to fight down an unexpected wave of guilt.

"Sorry I'm late. We didn't finish up until the AM and then I slept through my alarm."

She said nothing, face nestled into my neck, and took a deep breath. "Mmm. I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

She pulled back slowly, giving me that smile again, hands resting lightly on my shoulders, just looking at me silently for a long moment. I quirked an eyebrow. "You all right?"

Michelle nodded slowly. "Yeah. Yeah, I am. So... how's Jack?"

I froze, and felt my stomach plunge down to somewhere around my toes. "What?"

She smiled again, and I couldn't tell if she was angry, but the question was definitely not innocent. "That's who you met up with, right? How is he?"

I stepped back from her, mind reeling, trying to focus on something to steady myself. I ended up pouring myself a cup of coffee. "How did you - why would you think I was with Jack?"

"Well... Chloe called me about a week ago... said he'd asked for our address, she was worried he'd blow his cover if he showed up here." She wet her lips, and though I tried to read her expression, it was calm, carefully closed off. "So? How is he?"

It took me a moment to respond, still trying to figure out what exactly she was asking. "He's... good, he's... safe."

She nodded, and smiled. "Good. Next time you see him, give him my regards." She turned, heading for the doorway.

"Michelle...."

"Yes, Tony?"

I tried to find the right words, to find something, anything to say. "What are you thinking?"

She looked down, quiet for a moment, and when her gaze returned to mine, she looked a little wistful, a little sad. "Just that it would have been nice to hear it from you."

"I...."

She walked back to me, cupping her hands around mine on the coffee cup. "Sweetheart, I'm not... I'm not angry. But I'd like to hear the truth from you. Please."

I closed my eyes with a little shudder. "Why aren't you angry?"

Her voice was still soft and even. "Because I love you, and I want you to be happy. But... please show me that you respect me enough to tell me the truth, Tony."

I took a few soft breaths, forcing the words through my lips before I could think about it for too long. "I'm... sleeping with Jack."

I heard her sigh, a long, even exhalation of breath, almost sounding relieved. "How long has this been going on?"

I kept my eyes closed, face turned away, unable to bring myself to look at her and still be able to answer. "For a while. For... a long time."

I felt her lean in, felt her lips press to my cheek gently. "Thank you, love. We should get to the office."

She pulled away, and I looked back to her, half in shock at the last reaction I would have expected, half frightened that the shit was going to hit the fan at any moment. The calm of denial before the storm. "Michelle... why?"

She turned back to me. "Because it's a work day?"

"No, I mean... why aren't you... angry?"

She gave a little smile, resting a hand on the kitchen counter and looking down at it. The one with her wedding ring on it, I realized. "Tony, I... I've been pretty certain for quite a while. When we were separated, when I was still angry, I always told myself that if I ever saw you again I'd confront you with it. But then when you and I started to work things out, he went into hiding, so I didn't think it mattered. Didn't want to open old wounds while we were healing the ones in our marriage."

I still wasn't quite sure how to react to all of this, and set my coffee cup down on the counter, watching my hand shake a little as I did, as if it belonged to someone else. I'd never breathed a word about Jack to anyone, ever. Hardly even to myself. "How did you know?" I whispered hoarsely.

"Jack used to wear Fahrenheit by Dior...." She started, speaking slowly, remembering. "When we first started dating, you tried it on once in a store and I thought it smelled so nice on you that I bought you some...."

I nodded slowly, recalling very vividly why I'd actually smelled of Fahrenheit that day. "Yeah... I remember."

"It was nice on Jack, too. Then one day at work I noticed he was wearing something different, and when I asked him, he said Kim had bought him some ritzy, designer fragrance back from Boston, by a French designer called Azzaro. Apparently Boston's the only store he has the US. About a week or so later... I smelled it on you. Like I do now." She was silent for a moment, and I heard a soft sound, like a laugh, under her breath. "Once I got the idea in my head, once I started watching for it, there were other things. I'd catch the way he looked at you or the way you looked at him... the way you acted a few nights when you'd had to work late...."

I closed my eyes again, letting myself lean on both hands on the counter, emotions torn between guilt, sorrow and shame. "... I'm sorry."

I heard her sigh, and move toward me, felt her hand on my elbow. "Look... the way I figure, Jack was around long before I was. He's saved you more times than I can count - even when I gave up on you, he never did. When you were vulnerable, I... I gave up, I left you. He pulled you out of that, not me. I wouldn't have you if it wasn't for Jack." Her hand stroked slowly up and down my upper arm, soft and delicate and so unlike Jack's that it made this all the harder. "You always... " she started, and sighed. "You always seemed calmer, happier after you were with him... at least, when I assumed you were. These past couple of days you've just been so... alive. I guess it's because you finally got word from him."

"Yeah," I whispered softly, still not able to bring myself to look at her.

Her voice was softer, gentle, but a little unsure. "You've always been good to me, Tony, and I'm lucky to have you. I had a good cry about it in the beginning... but then you asked me to marry you, so I figured...." She stopped, as if waiting for me to disagree or validate her.

"I'm sorry," I whispered again, heart aching, hating how much I'd wronged her. Saying what I should say, what an honorable man, a good husband, would say, no matter how much it hurt to say it. "I... I won't see him again."

Her arms slipped around my waist, unexpectedly, and I flinched before slowly leaning back into her. "I don't want that," she murmured softly. "Just... just tell me this - tell me our marriage isn't a lie?" She shivered against me, and I turned to pull her to me tightly, pressing my lips to her hair.

"I love you," I whispered, and meant it. Even though my heart still ached for Jack, I cared for my sweet Michelle too much to let her go now that I had her back. So I pushed aside the memory of Jack asking me to be with him, before everything changed and he had to disappear. I could never have that, but what I did have was wonderful, too. "I want to share my life with you. And start a family, just like we've talked about. I've never lied to you about that."

"Thank you," she breathed, shivering in my arms a little. "I believe you."


~~~~~~~~~