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Brave Submission	By : SeasonofSons Category: S through Z > Sons of Anarchy Views: 3094 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Sons of Anarchy or any characters herein. I make no money from this writing.

Chapter List
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   "Are we ready for this shit?" Clay asked when Jax slid into the passenger seat of the van. "As ready as he'll ever be..."

"Why were both of you here?"

"Juice was freaking... Scared. We wanted to make sure he'd be cool today."

"Will he be?" Jax nodded. "He's good now." Tig and Juice climbed into the back of the van and Juice snapped a command to Sero, who jumped into the van and laid down. "Cute dog... Got a name?"

"Serotah... She's a good dog..." Clay nodded. "I'm sure she is." He looked back at the two and nodded. "Let's get this shit going then." He started up the van again and headed East.
   The van was peacefully silent for a good chunk of time. Jax and Juice both dozed off within forty minutes, Juice's head lulling gently against Tig's shoulder. Tig rolled his eyes at Clay in the rearview. Clay chuckled low in his throat. "So, do you like the kid?" He asked quietly. Tig nodded. "He's sweet... A little soft for SAMCRO... Kinda submissive... But that can be fixed with time."

"He told you much about this guy Rabador?"

"Not much... That he's a shit guy, that's about it... Knew Juice's Mom I guess." Clay nodded. "Think he'll do okay with this shit?"

"I think he's got something to prove... To us, and to himself. He'll do fine as long as he keeps that in mind."

"What's he gotta prove?" Tig gave a shrug with the shoulder Juice wasn't on. "His past really fucks with him... It's most of the reason he's the way he is, weird and quiet and shit... I think he needs to prove that he's SAMCRO worthy to us... And prove to himself that his past can't hold him back." Clay nodded. He turned on the radio, signaling the end of their conversation.
   "Welcome to Reno, boys." Clay said as he pulled into the rest stop. He parked and rubbed his hands, starting to ache. "Your turn to drive, Jax." Jax nodded, rubbing sleep from his eyes. Juice woke up completely and slid far away from Tig, his cheeks burning. "I'm so sorry..." He mumbled. Tig shrugged, moving his shoulder in circles to wake it up. "You were tired. Let's get her to the bathroom, poor girl has been so good." Tig scratched the napping dog behind the ear and hopped out of the van, whistling to her. She looked at him, her ear cocked. "The command is Kommen." Juice said. Tig nodded and squatted, snapping his fingers. "Kommen." Serotah hopped out of the van immediately, her tail going a mile a minute.

   Jax watched the two by the van silently, smoking a cigarette. He paced around the picnic table slowly, stretching his legs. "So, kid is gonna learn a lot more about our side business... Think he's okay?" Clay asked, gnawing the end of his cigar. Jax nodded. "He's good at keeping quiet, I think. He'll be good... Why do you seem so worried about him?" Clay shrugged. "He's... Different. I'm not used to him yet."

"How do you mean?" Clay shrugged again. "He's so quiet for one... Respectful. Even our Prospects are usually loud and rude... Kind of a precursor to being in SAMCRO. And he's well..." He cocked his head a little. "Hispanic."

"I know it's not against any rules, but it's definitely a first. Taking me some getting used to." Jax nodded. "But it might be just the advantage we need... The blacks and the Mexicans... They hate dealing with pure white groups, gangs or clubs... If we have a little color... Maybe we can befriend them."

"Yeah, and piss off every Aryan gang in Northern California... Plus you've got the Irish to think about... They're already on shaky turf with us because of this fucking Trevalore bullshit... If we let a Mexican into the club..." He breathed out a heavy breath. "He's not Mexican, he's Puerto Rican, which is a part of the United States... You can let them know that."

"Blacks can be American too, son... Doesn't mean the Irish like them." Jax sighed, knowing he was right. "He's one guy... Not like we're Prospecting half of the fucking ghetto. One guy." Clay shrugged. "We'll see about him. This week, it'll be the real decider, I think." Jax nodded. "So, how long is this drive gonna take?"

"About three days... We'll grab a hotel in Wyoming, then one in Ohio or somewhere around there, then we'll be in Queens by the end of the next day... I'm thinking this whole thing is gonna take about a week... Two tops."

"What if something comes up?" Clay shrugged. "We go with it. We always do." He headed back towards the van.

   Juice followed Tig into the bathroom. When they were in it, he wrapped his arms around him. Tig smiled weakly and pulled Juice's arms away. "Clay could catch us."

"He already went back to the van... Come on."

"We can't be too long." Juice's brow furrowed. "I didn't want anything..." He mumbled, a little hurt. "I wanted to get a kiss." He shrugged and walked to the urinal, unzipping his pants with no further words. Tig scowled, shaking his head.
   "So, Juice, you got any family in New York?"

"Not really..." Juice replied to Clay, looking out the window at the passing scenery. "What about your parents? Mom, Dad?"

"Don't know who my Dad is... My mom's dead... Only real family is brother, we don't talk much."

"Well why don't you go see him, we'll already be up here." Juice shook his head. "Not a good idea."

"Why?" He shook his head again. "We don't talk much for a reason." Clay nodded, letting the topic go. Tig looked over at him with a gentle gaze. He'd known Juice intimately long enough to know what that expression meant... Pure agony.
   Juice got the last shift. Clay had arranged a hotel in Cheyenne, Wyoming. The Latino had been driving for at least four hours, and had a good two left. Jax was sitting next to him, quietly smoking a cigarette. Clay was asleep in the backseat with Tig reading a magazine. The silence was heavy and choking for Juice, his body tensing more and his head aching more with every mile they took closer to New York.

   Jax looked over after a while. "You seem tense... Need a break?"

"No, I just wanna get us to the hotel... Did Clay book the room?"

"Yeah, one for him and I, and he put you and Tig in the other one with the pup." Juice glanced over for a second, his eyes round. Jax shook his head. "Father and son, you know." Juice nodded slowly. Jax glanced back. "You asleep, Clay?" He asked softly. Clay made no noise. "He doesn't suspect a thing... But you're gonna have to work really hard on keeping your shit together when we there... If he picks up on anything not quite straight... He'll leap on you." Juice nodded. He lit a cigarette and glanced in the rearview. He smiled a little when he saw Tig had dozed off as well. He turned up the music just a little and spoke in a soft voice. "About this morning..." Jax glanced up to make sure Tig was asleep. "I'm so fucking sorry... I don't know what got into me."

"You're curious." Juice said simply. Jax flushed, tugging on his hoodie string. "Did it turn you on?"

"What?" Juice shrugged. "Did watching me ride him make you horny?" Jax flushed. "Just a physical reaction... Doesn't mean shit."

"No, it doesn't... How much did you see?" Jax's flush deepened. "Started watching when he had the.. Y'know... Toy in you... Stopped right after you caught me."

"Now that means something."

"What? No, it doesn't." Juice smiled softly. "Why, if you weren't curious, and didn't think it was hot in the slightest bit, continue to watch for nearly ten minutes? Why not peek in, see that we were fucking, and walk away? Or even break it up?"

"I wouldn't have broken it up, it's your house."

"Then why not walk away?" Jax shrugged. "I'd have heard it anyways..."

"But you wouldn't have had to see it... You watched while one of your best friends shoved a dildo into my ass, then watched while I mounted him and impaled myself on his fucking dick... Why?" Jax shook his head. "I don't want to talk about this, one of them could wake up and hear it." Juice smiled softly. "I agree... We can talk later." He reached over and squeezed Jax's leg, up high on the thigh. He chuckled a little at the startled jump it elicited.

   Tig leaned up to the front when he woke. Jax was in the bathroom and Clay was still snoozing. "Got the time?"

"Nearly seven."

"Kid, you've been driving for hours... Need a break?"

"I'm taking one." Juice looked back at Tig, his eyes still a little hurt. "I'm gonna take a piss." Tig mumbled, moving back and sliding out of the van. He nodded to Jax, who scowled. "Well he looks fucking happy." He mumbled when he got back into the passenger seat. "I pissed him off."

"How?" Juice shrugged. "We just had a bit of a miscommunication earlier and it kinda... Well, it's gonna sound faggy as shit, but it kinda hurt my feelings. I let him know and I'm still sore over it... He's pissy because I'm not over it..." He sighed sadly. "He wants a real guy, not a guy that might as well be a chick..." He mumbled quietly. Jax sighed softly. "Juice, you're a--" Tig opened the door, and Jax silenced himself, not needing Tig to give him trouble... Not now.
   Juice nearly fell on the bed when he entered the hotel room. Soft had never felt so amazing. He glanced up when Tig entered, and scowled when he stretched out on he other bed. "Why aren't you sleeping over here?" Tig scowled. "Cause Clay is in the next room, dumbass." He said quietly. "So? He doesn't have a key..."

"I'm not gonna run the risk of him finding out I'm fucking you. I don't need that shit... Bad enough I'm doing it with Jax knowing." Juice frowned, his expression hurt. Tig looked over and made a disgusted sound. "Jesus Christ, Juice, get over it. You knew when you started this fucking thing with me that we'd never be open about it, quit acting like I'm hurting your feelings or some shit... I feel like I'm dating a fucking woman some days." Juice rose from the bed. "You've made out with me in the fucking bathroom at the clubhouse!"

"Shh!" Tig snarled, rising and slapping him upside the head. "You fucking dipshit!" Juice winced. "I did that cause Clay wasn't fucking there." He hissed under his breath. "Anyone else could have seen." Juice mumbled, shame rising like bile in his throat. "Are you really that ashamed to be gay?"

"I'm not fucking gay, Juice. One guy does not make me a fucking faggot." Juice winced at the words. He shook his head and pulled his hoodie on. "What? Leaving cause I'm being fucking honest?" Juice shook his head again. "Whatever... Stop being a fucking bitch, stupid." Tig flopped down on the bed. Juice gave him a pained expression before leashing up Serotah and walking out.

   Juice nearly bumped into Jax, standing outside smoking. Juice squeaked, surprised. "Sorry..." He breathed, moving to go around Jax. The blonde grabbed his arm. "Hey... What's wrong?" He'd seen Juice's expression. The young man looked up, his eyes glassy with unshed tears. "Nothing..."

"Don't lie... Come on, we'll go for a walk, I saw a trail up a few blocks." Juice nodded, too tired and hurt to say no. Jax wrapped his arm around him when they were out of sight of the hotel. "What's up?"

"Just fighting with Tig." The words broke the barrier Juice had forced up, and a few tears escaped. He wiped them annoyedly. "About what?" He shook his head. "He's just got a way with words that really hurts... It's stupid... I don't care so much why we fought, just how he comes back with what he says... The fucking fight was over him not sleeping with me tonight."

"Why won't he? Clay won't come in there..."

"He doesn't wanna risk it... I just hate feeling like I'm too much of a chick for him, or I'm a fucking dumbass... I hate when he calls me those names..." He shook his head. "But he's right... I'm whiny... And too sensitive for SAMCRO."

"Your sensitivity is is what makes you unique... It's different than at of the members and it's great... A bit of a reality check for most of us."

"Thanks Jax... But I know you're just being a nice guy... Sensitive and SAMCRO don't mix."

   Neither man spoke until they'd walked on the trail for a few minutes, surrounded by woods. Juice let Serotah off her leash; she stayed close, sniffing the trail. Finally Juice sighed. "I think I'm going to turn in my cut after all this is over." Jax's eyes bugged. "What?! No! Why?"

"I'm not cut out for you guys... It just... I won't ever fit in." Jax grabbed Juice and turned him to face him. He could see tear tracks from Juice's silent tears. "You are... Please, Juicy... Don't let someone like Tig Trager make you lose hope in yourself." Juice opened his mouth to speak. Jax snarled, cutting him off, and pressed his lips against Juice's in a hungry kiss.

   Their first kiss was messy and rough, teeth clashing, biting, awkward movements. When Juice pulled away, his sadness had been replaced by complete shock. Jax was panting, his cheeks flushed. "You're gonna be Redwood, Juice. I promise you." He breathed. The Latino slammed his mouth against Jax's, a hunger burning in his guts. He pushed them back into the woods a bit, pinning Jax to a tree as he devoured his mouth. Jax moaned under him, sliding his hands around Juice's back and fisting his clothes. Juice pulled away breathless, his cheeks flushed and his lips kiss swollen. He locked gazes with Jax for a long moment before sliding his hand over the front of the young mans pants. He smiled knowingly when he felt the erection. Juice slid to his knees, reaching up and unlatching Jax's belt. He'd managed to undo the button and begin sliding down the zipper when Jax grabbed him by the shoulders, hoisting him to his feet. "No... I won't let you do this, Juice..."

"Why not?" Jax shook his head. "I wouldn't feel right... You've let so many use you... I won't be another." Juice smiled with such emotion then, more than Jax had ever seen before. "No... You're right. You won't. I'm not doing this because I have to. Now shut up." Juice pushed his hands away and dropped back to his knees, unzipping his jeans the rest of the way and freeing his erection.

   Jax's head hit the back of the tree when he felt the tip of his dick brush the back of Juice's throat. He let out a helpless cry, gripping the fabric on the Latino's hoodie. Juice smirked around him, gently bobbing his head, his eyes shut contentedly. Jax grunted, looking down with wide eyes when Juice pulled away, the tip slipping free from his pouty lips with a slight, wet, pop. He looked up at Jax with an innocent gaze. He rose then and caught Jax's mouth, opening his submissively. Jax took control easily, flipping them so Juice was pinned to the trunk. He forced his tongue in, savoring the uniquely male taste of the young man. Juice's hands slid around his hips, fingers brushing the smooth skin of his back. Jax slipped his hand around Juice's front, undoing his pants and pushing them down. Juice grinned a little, his heart rate increasing tenfold when he felt Jax's cock brush his own, straining member. Jax pulled away to spit in his hand, reaching down to slick his own erection. Juice flushed. He shivered, not from the cold, and wet his own hand, reaching behind to slick himself. Jax locked gazes with him, looking for any reluctance. When he found none, he smiled, his shoulders relaxing a little. Juice returned his smile and turned, his hands bracing the tree as he leaned back, looking back at Jax with an eager expression. Jax stepped up, grabbing his shaft and brushing it against Juice's opening. The Prospect shivered, arching his hips back excitedly.

   Jax pushed home, earning a welcomed cry from Juice. He held the man close to him when he was buried deep, one hand on Juice's flat belly, the other on his hip. Juice turned, his lips catching Jax's in a needy kiss as the blonde began to thrust, deep, long strokes that sent shockwaves rippling through Juice's entire body. "Fuck..." Juice snarled against his mouth, reaching back and grabbing the back of Jax's neck to keep him close.

   Jax was lost in ecstasy. It didn't matter that this was completely wrong, not only was he fucking a guy, it was one of his brother's lovers... He was so taken by the pleasure, lost in the feel of Juice's body tightening around his shaft on each deep, inward thrust, that he nearly didn't hear his phone. With an annoyed grunt he paused his ministrations, buried to the hilt in Juice, and tugged his phone from his slouching jeans. "What?" He barked, out of breath. "Where are you?" Clay's voice was thick with concern. Jax relaxed a little against Juice. "The Prospect was walking his dog, I went with him... We got caught up talking, got a little turned around... We're on our way back now."

"Need me to come get you?"

"No, no, we're good, about fifteen to twenty away."

"Okay..." Jax snapped the phone shut and dropped it to the ground, burying his face in Juice's shoulder. He picked up the pace immediately, letting his teeth graze the smooth, tanned flesh. Juice moaned and begged softly in front of him, his head resting on Jax's shoulder. When the SAMCRO vp's teeth found purchase, biting hard on a fleshy piece of Juice's shoulder, the Latino cried out in pleasure. He bucked his hips back onto Jax's, and the man grunted against his shoulder, thrusting in with a newfound vigor. Juice reached down, stroking himself quick and hard, his head drooping forward as he panted Jax's name. The blonde biker thrust in, hard and deep, releasing inside the first man he'd ever taken. Juice cried out, his body clenching around the invading member as his own orgasm rushed over him, rendering his body useless save for shivering.

   When both came down from their climaxes, Jax stepped back from Juice, pulling his pants up. Juice turned, pulling his own up, a small, satisfied smile on his face. Jax's head was down, his cheeks flushed. Juice stepped up to him, reaching out and running his thumb over Jax's cheekbone. "Hey..." Jax looked up and smiled, embarrassed. "I didn't mean to..."

"Quiet. I did what I did because I wanted to, not because I fucking had to. Don't apologize."

"Then thank you... I didn't expect... It felt great." Juice smiled and pulled a pack of smokes from his hoodie. He handed one to Jax and lit his own. "Who was calling?"

"Clay... Wanted to know where I was." Juice nodded. He whistled and mumbled a command to Serotah, who came bounding out of the woods, her tongue lolling. Jax smiled softly when Juice flopped down, letting her tackle him. He looked happier with the dog than he ever looked with people. Jax helped him up after a moment, their noses nearly touching. Juice leaned forward, his eyes searching Jax's. Jax smiled and gave a barely perceivable nod. Juice saw it though, and pressed his lips to Jax's, soft and submitting. Jax held the kiss for a moment then pulled away. "Listen... With Tig..."

"Don't... Things don't need to change between us, okay? This was fun, but... I mean... You're the one that isn't a faggot... I'll leave it up to you if you want it again."

"You're not a fucking Crow Eater, Juice... I'm not gonna use you whenever I feel like it."

"No... You're not using me..." He said. "I'm offering myself. Not to be used... As a friend. Just fun." Jax nodded. He turned and headed down the path. Juice leashed up Serotah and trotted to catch up to him.

   They were almost to the hotel when Jax looked at Juice again. "Don't turn in your cut, Juice. I don't care what Tig does, or says... You're worth SAMCRO. Gay or straight... I think you might be just what this fucking club needs." Juice smiled sheepishly. "Thank you." Jax nodded, but said nothing more. When they reached the doors to their rooms, Jax simply nodded to Juice. "See you in the morning, brother."

"See you..." Juice breathed. He slipped into the darkened hotel room. Juice stripped down to his boxers, listening to Tig snore softly across the room. He crawled into his own bed. His body was still sensitive, feeling the phantom touches of Jax's fingers, the heat of his breath down Juice's neck, the bite of his teeth and sting of his member... Juice fell asleep with a small smile on his lips.
   The next morning, Juice woke and padded to the bathroom. His backside was throbbing as a pleasant reminder of last night. He flushed when he looked int he mirror. On his left shoulder, barely visible from the front, was a bruise where Jax had bitten him. He couldn't help the giggle that rose in his throat, but slung a towel over the bruise quickly and began his morning ritual.

   Juice was shaving when Tig awoke and shuffled into the bathroom. He sleepily wrapped his arms around Juice, resting his chin on the towel covering the young man's shoulder. "Good morning..." He murmured. Juice glared at their reflections for a moment before speaking. "Morning." He pushed Tig's hands off his waist and took a step to the side, making room at the mirror. "Too close... Clay might notice."

"I might have been overreacting last night..." Tig said quietly. He was still unapologetic, but Juice knew this was as close as he would come to one... Not good enough. "You were right." Juice said simply, wiping the remaining bits of shaving cream off his face and pushing past Tig into the bedroom.

   He grabbed his clothes and turned, coming face to face with Tig. "I'm trying to be nice here, Juice." Tig snarled. "I don't need you to be nice. You were honest last night. It works. It's whatever."

"Where did you go?"

"What?" Tig stared. "You were out forever... Where did you go?"

"Just for a fucking walk... What do you care?" Tig shook his head and turned, making like he was going to head back into the bathroom. Juice pulled the towel off his shoulder.

   Tig turned suddenly, his mouth open to speak. He saw the bruise gracing Juice's smooth flesh just as the Latino pulled the shirt over his body. "What is that?!" Tig snarled. "What's what?"

"That!" Tig stepped up to him and yanked his shirt's collar down, revealing the bruise. Juice shrugged. "Must've walked into something."

"Fucking liar. I know a fucking bite mark... Who were you with?" He got in Juice's face. The Prospect stepped back. "No one..." He breathed. Tig, losing his temper, grabbed Juice's throat, slamming him back the foot and a half to the wall. Juice winced, grabbing Tig's wrist hopelessly. "Who. Were. You. With?" Tig snarled, tightening his grip on each word. Juice winced again, struggling to breathe. "Just a guy I met..." He panted, his breath wheezing past the tiny area he had to breathe. "So you go out and fuck some random guy because we had a fucking argument?!" Juice's eyes welled with tears as his heart rate increased. "No..." He panted, trying to pry Tig's hand off his neck. "No, it wasn't like that... It just happened, please..." His plea was nearly silent, the final freeway of air he had getting cut off when Tig tightened his grip again. "Fucking whore... No good fucking..." Tig pulled back, ready to hit the smaller man, when a knock sounded at the door. Tig released Juice and he collapsed immediately, taking in large gulps of air. Tig turned on him, pointing a warning finger. "This conversation isn't finished." He snarled.

   Juice didn't move. He had one hand around his neck, his head hung. Tears threatened to burst, but he didn't dare let them, not knowing who was at the door. He held still, praying this was all just a bad dream. He did still love Tig, Tig was his perfect opposite... Jax and he would never work... Jax was too... Nice... He hadn't meant to... But what did it matter? He knew Tig still fucked the Crow Eaters then came back and expected Juice to remain uncaring... What was the difference?

   These thoughts and more were swirling in Juice's brain when Tig opened the door. Jax smiled. "Coffee." He said, holding up a cup. Tig chuckled. "Thanks, brother." He said, taking it. "Juice up yet?" Tig nodded. Jax glanced past him, his expression immediately turning concerned when he saw Juice. "What did you do?" He whispered. "Ask him." Tig mumbled, stepping out the door and holding his arm out, beckoning the way. "Get dressed and go help Clay get the van packed up." Jax demanded. He stepped into the room and squatted in front of Juice, reaching out and brushing his shoulder. Juice winced, just a little, and squeezed his eyes shut. "Juicy... It's me." Jax whispered. Juice shook his head. "I'm fine." He mumbled, his voice toneless. "What happened?"

"Nothing I didn't deserve..." Same monotone. "Come on, Clay will notice something's up if you act this way... Snap the fuck out of it." Juice nodded slowly. Jax took the hand not holding his throat and pushed a cup of coffee into it. "Four sugar, just how you like it... Be glad, Prospect." He tried to tease, but it fell on empty ears. His small smile faded and he brushed Juice's mohawk, standing and looking to Tig.

   "You're going to tell me why he's like this." He growled. Tig shrugged, tugging on his shirt and pulling on his belt. Jax grabbed his shoulder. "Why? This isn't okay, Tig. I don't fucking care if he's just a Prospect or your fucking lover... With his fucking past, why? What did you fucking do to make him go back to that?" Tig shoved Jax's hand off his shoulder. "I didn't do a fucking thing. His past is the reason he's like that. Now get out of my face, brother." Jax's jaw clenched and unclenched, his anger apparent. "You get to come up with the excuse when Clay asks why he's a fucking mute again... If you set him back to when he first started Prospecting, I swear to God I will kick your ass."

"Why do you care?" Tig snarled. "It's not like he's going to actually make it." His voice was soft, but Jax had a feeling Juice could still hear. "Clay isn't gonna let a fucking Latino into the club, especially not one who worked as a fucking gay whore for years... As soon as Clay finds out, he's gonna be turning in his fucking cut." Jax shook his head, disgusted. "I thought you cared about him, Tig... How can you say that shit if you care about him?"

"I thought he cared about me too." Tig mumbled.

   He yanked on his belt. "Get dressed, Juice." He snapped. Juice rose robotically, dressing quickly, his head down. "Come on." Tig said again. Juice grabbed all of their things and carried them out, following Tig, his head hung. Jax watched with slightly parted lips, his expression that of awe and disgust.
   Juice was silent the first chunk of their drive, his hands placed in his lap, his head down. Clay glanced back, his expression becoming more concerned each half hour. "What's up, Prospect?" Juice looked up, and Jax felt sick. He could see the boy's eyes were empty.. He was somewhere, but not here. "Tired..." He whispered, his voice raspy. "He had a rough night." Tig added. "Couldn't sleep... I'm sure he'll be fine once he gets some rest." He squeezed Juice's shoulder, and once again Jax noticed a wince. Juice's hoodie pulled in the slightest. Jax's scowl deepened. On the side of Juice's neck, near his ear, he could see the faintest of bruises forming... Ones he assumed would eventually create something similar to a handprint.

   "Why don't you sit in the back today, with Clay, Tig." Jax said when they were switching for a rest stop. Clay, Jax, and Tig had all driven a large chunk of their next leg. They had about four hours left before Toledo, their next night stop.

   "I'm okay up front."

"No... I'm driving, Juice is too tired to drive... I'd rather him up with me." Tig scowled. "Stay out of my fucking relationships, Jax... I'm warning you."

"And I'm telling you. As the vp of your fucking club. Keep your hands off the fucking Prospect. He doesn't need it, and neither do I."

"Fuck off." Tig snapped, but climbed into the back seat. Juice was approaching with Serotah, his head still hung. Jax whistled, motioning him over to the front of the van. He stopped in front of him. "Juice. Look at me." He said softly. Juice looked up, his dark eyes even darker, empty. "You're sitting up front with me today... You aren't driving in this condition." Juice nodded, his head dropping submissively again. "I don't know what Tig did, or said, this morning, that put you back into this place, but you gotta snap out of it."

"There's nothing to snap out of." Juice's voice was still hoarse. "He just reminded me." He shrugged. Jax reached out and tugged Juice's hoodie aside, sighing sadly. "Reminded you by choking you?" Juice gently pulled the hoodie back tight to his body. Jax leaned forward, tugging Juice's hoodie string to make him look up. "You. Juice. Are not someone's pet. You have a brain, and a damn quick one. Fucking snap out of it. You want SAMCRO."

"No one thinks I'll get it..."

"I do." Jax grabbed Juice's hand, pulling it to palm up. He pressed something into it and shut his hand around it. "I do. And you had better. Because I don't put a cut on just anyone, understand me?" He patted Juice's hand. "Put that in your pocket, and look at it when you're alone." Juice nodded, closing his eyes. "You're sitting up front. Come on, get in." He nodded to the door. Juice let Serotah in the back, glancing up to meet Tig's angry blue glare. He dropped his head again, shame welling in his throat. He climbed into the front and buckled up.



   Jax had been driving for about an hour when he glanced back. "Hey, Clay, do you wanna switch up rooms tonight?" He suggested. Clay shrugged. "Why?" Jax shrugged in reply. "Change of scenery... Maybe let you and the Prospect get to know each other, or give Tig a break from babysitting." He nudged Juice playfully. Juice remained still, looking out the window distractedly. Clay shrugged again and looked at Tig. "What do you think?" Tig was staring intently at Jax through the rearview. "I like the room order. Juice isn't annoyed by my snoring, and I like the dog... I'll babysit another night I think." Jax frowned and Clay shrugged. "Works for me. I just want a bed to sleep in, I don't give a flying fuck who's in the bed next to me." With that he wiggled further into his seat and leaned his head back. Within ten minutes he was asleep. Jax flipped up the center console, flopping his hoodie onto the bared seat between he and Juice. He looked over at the young Prospect for a moment. "So, no chance of you going to see your brother?"

"No."

"What if you two could reconcile? You've changed... You're a better person than you were thirteen years ago. Don't you think?"

"I guess." Jax sighed. This would be like pulling teeth. "I think we should see him... What about just you and me?"

"Bad idea." Juice breathed, lighting a cigarette. "I'm going to take a nap... It's going to be a long night." Jax nodded, a little sad. When he and Juice had separated last night the young Latino seemed almost... Normal. Smiling, talking, relating to real things that mattered... Now he was back to the brooding street shadow that Jax had run in to nearly six months ago.



   Jax pulled into the hotel's parking lot at nearly eleven, stifling a yawn. "We're here... Clay, want me to grab the rooms?"

"Yeah. They're in my name." Jax nodded and hopped out of the van. He returned with the room keys, handing one to Tig and one to Clay. "Let's get some shut eye." He said, grabbing his and Clay's bag. He handed Juice the other bags, meeting his eyes in a long, burning gaze. Juice broke the stare first, hanging his head when Tig came up behind Jax. "Let's go." Tig commanded, and Juice followed wordlessly. Clay scowled a little. "Those two seem to be finding a very strange way to work together."

"Tig's just bossy and Juice knows he needs to listen to the brothers if he has a chance in hell of being patched in... He's smart... But I wish Tig wouldn't fucking take advantage." Clay laughed a little at his step-son. "You're too soft hearted, Jackson... Gonna get you fucked over one of this days." Jax grunted. "Don't I fucking know it." He mumbled before heading toward their room.



   Tig shut and locked the door before turning on Juice. "Sit the fuck down." Juice laid the bags down and sat on the bed, his hands clasped in front of him. "Who were you with."

"Just some guy... I didn't catch his name." He whispered, his head hung. "So you fucking run off, fuck some random guy, because I wouldn't sleep in bed with you?" Tig snarled. "You fuck other people." Juice whispered. "Excuse me?" Tig approached him quickly and Juice flinched. "You fuck others, then come home and expect me to suck you off or fuck you... There are days I can still taste pussy on your dick..." He whispered, his voice cracking. "I have to! Goddamnit, are you that fucking selfish? If I stopped fucking everyone in the club would know what was up." He snarled. "You can be such a fucking moron, Juice." Juice nodded in a silent agreement. Tig shook his head. "I'm fucking sick of this shit..." He muttered.

   He sat on the bed across from Juice. "You're not cut out for this life... You can't take criticism... You can't take anything but dick." Tig said softly. Juice nodded slowly. "I know... I'm turning in my cut after all this is done... I want to do this one last thing to help the club... Then I'm done..." He felt tears welling in his eyes as he spoke, but knew his head was too low for Tig to see. Jax's words were fighting to scream through his brain, and it was a struggle to keep his voice calm. "I'm sorry I let everyone down." Tig sat silently, surprised at Juice's reply. Even when he'd said it... He didn't actually believe it... Or believe Juice would roll over and give up.

   The Latino rose slowly and tugged off his hoodie. He left on his shirt, but tugged off his pants. Tig did a double take at the light bruise grazing Juice's throat. "Did I do that?" He asked softly. Juice looked over, then down, folding his jeans. "What?"

"Your neck..." Tig replied, already knowing the answer. Juice nodded. "When you were yelling at me this morning."

"Shit... I'm so sorry, Juicy... I didn't think I was squeezing that tight..." Juice shrugged. "I bruise easy." He put his bag on the floor and called Serotah up to the bed, stretching out under the covers. Tig watched him for a long moment, until he looked over. "Are you gonna go to bed?"

"Do you want me to lay with you until you fall asleep?" Tig offered. Juice's mind screamed yes, but he shook his head. "No... Don't want to risk your reputation." He reached up and flipped off the light, basking them in darkness. It was only then that he let his silent tears slide down his cheeks.
   Juice was awake most of the night, tossing and turning. He felt sick over his and Tig's failing relationship, and even more over the fact that he'd now told two people he was gonna give up his cut... Couldn't back out now... Not after Tig pretty much encouraged him to do so. He got up when the clock hit four a.m., giving up on sleep. He dressed and padded outside with Serotah to have a cigarette. The brisk morning air made him shiver. With a grunt, he shoved the hand not holding his cigarette into his pocket. Scowling, he withdrew the small, flat box that Jax had pushed into his hand the other afternoon. He glanced around and hoisted himself onto a nearby railing, opening it. Inside lay a scythe patch, one of the ones like Jax had on his cut. Juice pulled it out, and withdrew the small sheet of paper underneath it. Juice pulled it out and opened it. It was in Jax's blocky handwriting.
'I'd get in so much trouble if I used one of our real patches to give you this message, so I hope a duplicate of my unique one will do to get the message through your thick skull. You've earned your place, Juice. This trip. This dedication... Despite everything you're afraid might happen to you? You're still doing it, and that, that is SAMCRO. You aren't anyone's fucking pet. You're not Tig's property, you're not mine. You're a guy who's been through a lot of shit and who just needs a family. You got one. Every family has that one fucking member... That's who Tig is. He's got a good heart. But he's a fuck up about this kind of shit. Let it go. Keep your head up, keep your voice loud. And keep yourself sharp. Don't give this opportunity up. Hold onto this patch, Juicy. Give it back to me when I hand you your patch, okay? We need you.'
   Juice felt tears slip silently down his cheeks as he read and reread the note. He looked at the patch lying in his hand and felt his throat close again, tears blurring his vision. He fisted his hand around the scythe and put it to his mouth, taking a deep, shaky breath. He wiped away his tears and folded up the note, slipping it into his wallet. He put the patch back into the small box and slid it into his jeans, the feel of it making him smile. He headed back into the hotel room and stretched out on the bed, dozing off before he'd even realized it.

   Tig woke a few hours later and looked over. Juice was fully dressed, sleeping on top of the covers. Tig sighed a little and sat up, glancing at the clock... Kid was sleeping late. He rose and walked over to him, looking down at him. He saw the bruises matching his own fingers and winced a little. No wonder Juice didn't want to continue this... He knew he lost his temper, but hadn't realized it until this point. Gently, he knelt in front of Juice, reaching out and brushing his hand over the younger man's stubbly cheek. "Baby..." He whispered. "Baby... Wake up, it's almost time to go." Juice grumbled and rolled to his side. Tig chuckled and leaned over, pressing a kiss to his temple. He walked into the bathroom, figuring the kid could sleep a while longer at least.

   Juice was startled awake at the knock in the door. He padded to open it, tugging on his hoodie. Jax stood on the doorway. "Morning." He said, handing Juice a cup of coffee. Juice took it and stepped aside so he could enter. Jax could hear the shower running. He sat, speaking softly. "Did he hurt you last night?"

"No... He was mad... But he didn't hurt me... I think I hurt him... He feels as for bruising my neck." Jax nodded. "Did you tell him it was us?"

"No... Said it was some random guy is met while I was out walking... Earned me the whore title all over again, but you're safe." Jax smiled weakly. "Thank you... Did you get a chance to look at what I gave you?"

"Yes... Thank you." He said, his cheeks burning. Jax nodded. "Are you gonna stay with him, Juicy?" Juice shrugged helplessly. "I love him, Jax. I really am in love with him, in spite of all this shit he's done... If he wants to keep me... I'm his. I just don't think he wants to keep me after this..." Jax nodded slowly. He squeezed Juice's shoulder, kissing his temple. "Talk to me if you need to, Juice." Juice nodded, hugging Jax weakly. The blonde stood. "Tell Tig he can have his morning coffee when he gets his ass downstairs. We gotta get on the road." Juice nodded, rising and beginning to repack his bag.



   "Last day on the road... Are you ready for this, Juice?" Clay asked, glancing in the rear view at the young Prospect. Juice, who was playing quietly with Serotah in the back seat, looked up and nodded. "Anything for the Club... I can do this." Clay smiled, a hint of pride glinting in his eyes. "So what should our plan be?" Juice took a deep breath. "Rabador runs a tight place... Way in unless you get a personal invite from one of his boys. Has to be a boy, the girls are just whores. I know where they all hang out... Jax... You'd be best to get one of them. I know a few that we're working there when I left New York, if they're still working I'll point one of them out... Can't be me, they all know me really well. We just have to convince whoever we grab to give us the invite in... If one boy, Ray, is still working, he'll be our best bet... He hates Rabador..." Juice shrugged. "After that, it's gonna depend on Rabador's cooperation." Clay nodded. "Good plan, kid... Let's hope it works."
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