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THE GOLDBERGS – CONTROL ANYONE – GET A HEAD.	By : Eddie_Davidson Category: -Misc TV Shows > General Views: 8372 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the Goldbergs or have any association with the official TV production or content. I do not make any money from this. This is purely a work of fanfiction.

Chapter List
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THE GOLDBERGS – CONTROL ANYONE – GET A HEAD.
Chapter Five

DINNER WITH THE GOLDBERGS: As told by Erica Goldberg
You might be thinking this story is simply to over the top to be true. I had just endured the humiliating experience of watching TV in the nude while I held my knees as far apart as I could in front of my brothers and their friends. The perverts stared at my exposed body while I jabbed my thumb up my ass because my little brother told me to. Most of them laughed about it and wanted to be able to order me to do it also!

You might wonder why I didn't kick their ass or simply refuse. The bet I had made with my mother to pretend we were under Adam's influence had spiraled into something neither of us could have anticipated. Did a bet between my mother and me mean that much that I would smile and keep doing what my little brother told me? Well, yes. Yes, it did.
I felt defeated and ready to quit this strange game after Adam told me I could go upstairs and wash up when they finished watching TV. I don't know why, but when my mother makes a bet or we compete with each other in a game, neither of us can give in. We can't even budge. We have a long history of epic battles that never end.

The fear and trepidation I was feeling wasn’t as much related to wondering what Adam would make me do. I know my little brother is a horn dog but he is relatively harmless. I also knew that I could at any time I could end this charade and give him a hard cold dose of reality by way of my foot up his ass. Even though I was submitting to his silly orders I always had the power in this scenario to end it.
The real question was if my mom was going to bail the moment things get weird. Once she got naked and put all her clothes in the garage I knew she wasn’t going to quit any time soon. The bigger uncertainty was could we pull this off and keep up the charade? If we didn’t have our shit together then eventually we’d slip up.
I don’t know how to explain this because I should have been embarrassed of exposing myself to my brothers and their friends. I was more embarrassed of them finding out I was playing a game until I wanted them to find out. The conversation with my mother erased all those doubts. We had a game plan now and I was ready to actually try to pull this off. I can’t tell you what my end-game was anymore. I no longer knew what the point we were trying to make to Adam was. I just knew that I wanted to make this as believable as possible and I’d know when this game should end! If it did – when it did then it would be on our terms and not his. I wouldn’t quit or make mistakes this time. I planned to finish what I had started!
Strangely, I didn't feel like I was competing with Mom anymore. We still had a bet, but it was now a more friendly competition. I felt my mom and I were in this together. I walked downstairs more energized and confident than ever even though I was wearing on a pair of pink leg warmers and a matching headband.
Adam offered me a choice. I could bend over a chair and pose with my butt in the air during dinner, or I could help mom cook. I knew the vulgar pose was the exact same one on my brother's Penthouse magazine cover. I knew my entire pussy and bare asshole would be visible to everybody if I did it. I would have chosen it if not for the offer to wear an apron if I helped cook. I also saw how elated my mother was that I might help her in the kitchen. It was always her dream to pass on her Yenta knowledge of recipes to me so that I could provide the same succulent meals to my family. I just had no interest in cooking.
I noticed Adam and Dave Kim talking after he gave me a choice. I wondered if Adam was trying to trick me. I was supposed to be under the influence of his tea and obey his instructions. I assumed they were questioning whether a person under the influence of mind control could make a choice in that situation.
I snickered because the joke was on those two dweebs. The reason they were debating was that they believed the mind control tea was working. They had fallen for it hook, line, and sinker.
Yet, I was the one with my ass hanging out in a green apron and leg warmers bending over a hot stove checking on Lasagna while they gazed at my ass.
I was very self-conscious about my butt. I have a plump backside like my mother. It isn't that which really bothers me, though. I've seen my asshole in the mirror. The skin around it is gray, like charcoal ash. I also have a very lumpy sphincter that sticks out like a little turd mushroom. My mom's asshole is bright pink and nearly wrinkle-free, like one of those girls in Adam's Penthouse.
Yes, I looked through the pages before. Yes, I know why they are sticky.
Anyway, I only know what color my mom's asshole is because I saw it while she bent over to check on food with me.
"Stop bending with the knees," Adam told us. He said it was better for our backs if we bend at the waist. I wanted to call him a dummy because it was actually the opposite.
Instead, I agreed like a dimwitted bimbo.
I have a confession to make. My best friend lives next door. Her name is Lainey. She is smart, sexy, and blonde. However, she can also be incredibly dim-witted and short-sighted. Lainey is a perfect match for my brother because they are both smart and stupid at the same time in opposite but equal ways.
They weren't dating right now. I recently gave Lainey advice to break up with my brother. She asked me why, since she liked him.
"Don't break up with him permanently," I said. I told Lainey to break up with him and then make him do something sweet to win her back. I told her then to find some reason to break up again and make him make an even grander gesture to woo her and win her over. I told her to repeat that until she was sure he was utterly devoted to her. It had never worked for me. Most guys usually ran off after the first three or four times I broke up with them. Still, I was waiting for a guy who would endure any emotional rollercoaster to be with me.
Lainey was worried about that happening with Barry.
I told Lainey not to worry because she had sexy bimbo eyes. I imitated how she sometimes looked vulnerable and confused and talked like a bimbo.
Lainey recognized the look immediately and giggled. She admitted that boys do like a bimbo.
"If you ever push him too far, just play the dimwitted bimbo and act like you need him," I smiled as I gave her the advice and added, "If that doesn't work, a good blowjob will probably win him over."
I was channeling Lainey’s bimbo expression and manner of speech. Any time I was asked a hard question, I pretended the mind-control was gripping me, and I had to obey him. Adam believed I was struggling against his instructions and didn’t know why I was doing them. He had to be feeling pretty guilt-free about that. I was making mental notes though and I planned to make him pay for everything he made me do when I finally ‘wake up’ and get control of my faculties back. I was too caught up in the charade and the bet with my mom to think about that right now. I have to admit that a part of me enjoyed playing along with it and a part of me absolutely hated every second of it.
My mom has a sizable dining room table that extends to seat nine people. If we have more people over, we bring out a folding table just for kids. I am the oldest, so I still get to sit at the adult table while my brothers are relegated to sitting with the other mouth breathers and little kids at dinner.
Dad, Barry, Pops, Dave Kim, Adam, Andy, Naked Rob, Matt Bradley, and Geoff Schwartz were all seated - nine chairs.
"Barry, go get the folding table," My mom demanded. Mom only had to talk politely to Adam. She could tell Barry to go to hell if she wanted to do that.
"What? the kid's table?" Barry was deeply offended to be reminded of the wobbly table. It was covered in kool-aid stains, crayons, and snot from years of only being used on special occasions as a place for kids to eat. "Adam! Tell them to stand at the table and hold their butts!"
I think Barry was using a figure of speech when he said to hold our butts. I think what Barry really meant was that we could patiently wait for everyone else to eat and then sit down.
Adam couldn't stop giggling while he said: "Mom and Erica, stand at the table and hold your butts."
Adam had learned to tell us to do something instead of making it sound like a question. If he had asked us, I would have said to him that I didn't want to do that.
Mom promptly pushed her body into an empty space between my Dad and Barry at the table. She pressed her tummy up against the edge of the table and reached behind her back and pulled her butt cheeks apart as wide as she could.
"Like this?" My mom asked Adam. He actually leaned back in his chair and looked right at our mom's ass and told her to pull it apart from a little wider.
I had no choice based on our establishment clause to do the same thing. I chose a spot between Geoff and Andy because there was enough space. I gripped my butt and pulled my cheeks apart.
There was a lot of laughter at the table. Even Pops was checking out my tits. I know he loves me and thinks the world of me, but he is also a man of the world. Even though it creeped me out, I wouldn't expect him to pass up a chance to ogle a young set of natural boobs.
Barry's friends tossed their spoons and forks behind us to pretend they dropped them. It was pretty obvious it was just a reason to stare at our butts.
Geoff Schwartz looked right up at me and whispered, "I am sorry, Erica. I gotta do this." He tossed his fork on the carpet behind me and had his look.
I like Geoff on some level. He is so nice that I just want to slap his gentle face sometimes, though. I gave him an icy stare when he sat back down. If he ever summoned the courage to ask me out, I'd probably date him just to make him pay for joining in on ogling my ass.
I pulled my ass cheeks open nice and extra-wide and winked my butthole at Geoff. I don't know if he saw, but I wanted him to get a good look. It would help later when I decided to make him pay for staring at me while I did it.
I didn't cheat either. I could have stopped pulling my ass cheeks apart and relaxed a little after the initial order. I could tell from the strained look on my mom's face that she was not cheating. I didn't want to get called out and be told to hold my ass open wider. If I was going to do this thing now - I was going to do it right. It was uncomfortable, humiliating, and strangely arousing. I could tell from the look on my mom's face; she was feeling the same kind of mixed emotions. She may have looked fearless to everyone else, but I could tell she had some apprehensions and doubts mixed with a lot of shame and embarrassment.
I wouldn't blame you if you thought what I am telling you is all malarkey. We've had quite a few strange misadventures that seem surreal enough that even I sometimes wonder if this is normal for any other family.
Let me rewind a little, and maybe it will make a bit more sense to you.
I found my brother's mind control pills under his bed a few weeks ago. I immediately shoved his goofy face into his dirty clothes hamper and made him wear his underwear on his head. Then I forgot about it. I didn't even mention at the time that I knew about the pills. As far as he was concerned, it was just another random head-dunking into his dirty clothes that I gave him to show him who is boss.
I noticed a few days ago he gave the tea to Barry and my Dad. Naturally, it didn't work, but the fool thought it might. The fact Adam intended that the mind control could work was what made me angry.
I was waiting for the little shit to have the audacity to try to serve it to me. I probably would have smeared extra chunky peanut butter in his underwear and made the annoying little dweeb lick it clean before wearing it to school, and that is just for starters.
I don't hate my little brother. He is annoying, but he means well. I actually look out for him sometimes. I've handled bullies who were harassing him without him even knowing about it. I just don't like to TELL him I care about him. However, if he tried to turn me into his mind slave, I would definitely have kicked his ass nine ways to Sunday.
As you know, that isn't what happened. My mom dotes on Adam as her golden boy. She had an entirely different take on his motivations, and she wanted to use this as one of her teachable moments.
Trust me; you can't stop Beverly Goldberg when she wants to teach you by applying one of her teachable moments. It is just going to make things much, much worse if you even try. You are going to get taught whether you like it or not, and she'll make you feel incredibly guilty if you don't appreciate it.
I don't remember exactly how we agreed to this charade. I think sometimes when my mother and I work collectively; I get lost in a cloud and caught up in whatever scheme my mom thought up.
I think my mom and I collaborate well, but we feed off each other's intensity and personality traits.
It could be that, or it could just be my mom knows exactly how to press my buttons until I accidentally end up agreeing with her. Someone should bottle Beverly Goldberg! Guilt and manipulation in a bottle would be real mind control.
I just remember thinking that my mom was in denial about Adam. He is a boy going through puberty. The first thing he is going to tell a girl to do once he has her under mind control is to show him their tits. I can't imagine any boy who wouldn't do that. I think I agreed just to see her face when Adam told one of us to take off our top. I assumed she'd let me hang him by his balls over the mantle on the fireplace the first time he asked us to do something perverted.
Instead, she started making concessions and conditions about doing it. I agreed to play along just to see if my mom would follow through. I had no problem flashing my tits in front of my brother. I am not an extrovert, but Barry and Adam and I grew up in the same household. I've seen the two of them flitting around the house in their underwear plenty of times. They've "Accidentally" walked in on me changing or showering many times. I usually chase them with a crimping iron and threaten to crimp their faces. I am not a prude, so I wasn't going to pretend I was devastated if they caught a glimpse of my boobs. I knew they didn't obsess over me or anything weird because I am their sister.
My brothers like boobs and butts like most guys. I remember once my mom hung paintings of naked older women in the hallway. She considered them valuable fine art, but she bought them at a cheap yard sale. Barry and Adam called the pictures "Old Ladies Butt," but they still stared at them in awe. I wasn't surprised at all that my brothers would like to look at my boobs.
I was shocked to discover that my mom was willing to play along too. I walked into the kitchen and saw her topless and realized my mom really wanted to win this bet with me. I had violated the golden rule that my mother has reinforced since I was a baby in diapers.
I underestimated Beverly Goldberg!
I knew at that moment that the game was on and things had changed. I hadn't bothered to think about the long term consequences of the bet because I honestly never thought things would get this far. Suddenly, I wanted to win the competition. It wasn't because I wanted the three weeks of peace and quiet from my mother's incessant attention and smothering. I knew I'd never get that. There was no way my mom could deliver on a promise to stay out of my life.
I don't know what I intended to prove or win. I started obeying Adam around the house, and while I was loathe doing what the little cretin told me, something was thrilling about it. The fact that Adam didn't know I wasn't really under his influence amused me. I could quite literally rip him a new asshole if the mood struck me. The consequences of losing the bet were sufficient that I'd put up with his shit, but if he took it too far then Adam would go down. Mom and I would probably both make his life a living hell.
It made it feel safe to surrender to his authority. If he went too far, I could simply hang him by his balls from the mantle place with or without my mother's blessing.
Things escalated rather quickly since that. If Adam had made me stand nude with my hands holding my ass cheeks apart the first night I would have brought the holy fury of a sister's wrath down on his head. Everyone was gawking and eating while I literally had my ass in my hands.
My attitude about it had evolved by starting with the smaller orders to the point that now I considered myself lucky that my brother was showing some reservation about using his authority over us.
I knew Dad was doing his best to eat dinner and pretend to ignore the situation. He's ignored entire brawls between Barry and me at the dinner table. There was one time that Barry thought he was the King of Wrestling. I told him it was all fake, and he tried to put his special wrestling moves on me. Dad didn't even look up from his newspaper while I choked Barry out at the table.
Even he couldn't ignore what mom and I were doing. I was shocked he hadn't put a stop to this sooner. I have a few theories about that. My Dad works hard for a living, but at home, he can be a big procrastinator. Yelling and complaining take no energy, though, so that wasn't entirely the reason for him allowing things to continue to this point.
My Dad knows better than to stop my mom once she gets an idea in her head. He knows if he ignores it, she will eventually lose interest, and the whole thing will blow over.
One time my mom put on skin-tight spandex and performed an equal part erotic and comedic rendition of Maniac from the movie Flashdance for us. It looked like something Lucille Ball might have done if she was still making comedy. We all laughed our asses off, but my Dad laughed so hard that he ended up in the hospital. He ended up eating serious crow for not being supportive of my mom's whacky ideas. A case could be made that Dad accepted my mom's body acceptance/woman's lib lame excuse for why we were naked. He could have been trying to let this thing work itself to its natural conclusion.
I think though that it was that Mom turned him on. You had to look past the years of worrying and yelling to see it on his face, but there was a twinkle in his eye that wasn't there the day before.
Dad didn't stare at my mom or me like everyone else at the table.
He looked down at his meal and pretended to ignore us. I don't know why, but I think the attention my mom was getting was making him excited.
I told my mom earlier that I didn't want to hear about her sex life, but I could only assume things had got hot and heavy in the bedroom last night and good for them if it did. I just didn't want another baby brother to come along!
Dad finally had enough of the tittering whispers and suggestions that Adam tells us to do naughty things, and we would have to do them. I heard a lot of suggestions like making us dance for them to get on the floor and bark like dogs. Andy wanted me to milk my tits. Naked Rob and Andy conspired quietly about sexual things they'd like to do to me if they could. I knew they had those thoughts, but it seemed like they didn't care if I heard them plotting about fucking my ass or sucking on my tits.
Geoff shyly suggested I let him smell my hair. I thought that was sweet until I realized he was suggesting I let him sniff my pubic hair.
Dad pounded his fist on the table and looked up with an annoyed expression. "Adam, stop telling your mom and sister to hold their ass cheeks apart at the table, Ya Moron!" Dad demanded with a completely straight face.
The rest of the table cracked up with laughter. I think it was the deadpan way my Dad delivered the line that made it seem so hilarious. He delivered the line with the same kind of tone he'd use if he were driving and yelling to the backseat of the car that he'd pull over if we didn't stop poking each other.
I have to admit I even grinned a little. I was supposed to be under the influence of mind control, so I pretended to think everything was perfectly normal and kept a relatively straight face. The rule in movies about mind control seems to be that everyone else realizes that the subject is behaving erratically and out of character except for the subject themselves and anyone else under mind control. The subject remains calm even if they get ordered to put a gun to their temples and pull the trigger. I remained nice and calm.
My pussy was dripping wet, and my nipples were rock solid. I told myself it was chilly in here, but it was just 72 degrees. I knew that on some level, my body was reacting to all the adrenalin and humiliation. It had before
"Mom doesn't always do what I say," Adam smiled innocently like he had no idea what my Dad was talking about. It only infuriated my father even further because he knew something and my mom wasn’t fixing it.
Dad may pretend to be aloof and not care, but I was sure he hadn't told Adam to stop telling us what to do at random. He must have heard Barry and his friends theorizing about Adam's magic touch.
They had a lot of theories about why we were obeying his orders. All they had were absurd theories about Adam wiggling his Jedi fingers and us becoming unable to resist him.
Matt Bradley stunned me when he suggested I was just goofing on them and selectively doing what Adam told me. I almost giggled when he called me out while we were watching television. If I had, it would have confirmed we were playing a game. It was the simplest and most obvious reason for why I was obeying my brother. I was amused that everyone else thought he was wrong.
I had been given an order so over the top, and I obeyed it with a straight face. I didn't hesitate to stick my thumb up my ass when Adam told me.
It was amazing that was all it took to reduce most of them to a belief in supernatural mind control. They didn't know if Adam was doing it, but they all believed he COULD do it, and their best theory was magical hand gestures that hypnotized us.
Adam and David Kim are smart, but there was no question they thought they had incredibly power mind control drugs that worked only on women. They must have concluded that after it failed to work on Dad and Barry and only on me and mom.
I made a mental note to think about what we will do when Adam finally gets another girl to drink the tea and slaps the snot out of him.
Hypnosis, Magic, Chemicals - It all seemed like superstition to me in one form or fashion. I felt it was impossible anyone could maintain a loyal slave that obeys your orders while being oblivious to your influence. There were times like now that I did wonder if I was in an old Twilight Zone episode where logic didn't work. I asked myself if it was possible that the mind control REALLY did work? Maybe, it worked so well that mom and I thought we were choosing to do all of this because of some elaborate game? I wouldn't fall for the same silly superstitions. I knew better than that. I'd defied my brother's orders many times at school and the mall. I was only holding my ass cheeks apart now because mom and I agreed to obey the rules and not cheat.
My Dad believed in absurd superstitions, as well. Dad believed wearing his unwashed Philadelphia Eagles jersey influenced the season. He'd go literally ape-shit on you if you touched his lucky wall during a game because it cursed the game.
I don't think Dad bought into Adam's ability to do Jedi mind tricks. I think he just didn't want to confront mom directly and tell her to stop standing at the dinner table, holding her ass in her hands.
I think if you had tuned in to the story when my Dad made his demand of Adam, you might have thought no family would behave this way. I think if you heard the blithe way my little brother pretended he had nothing to do with our actions, you would have called it implausible.
Adam TOLD us after we served the meal to stand there like this, and we obeyed him without reservation. We didn't do what anyone else us told us to do.
The things Barry wanted me to do were so crass and vulgar that this story may have been entirely different. I was obviously doing something crass and vulgar now, but there had been a slow build to get here that was subtle enough that it made sense to me how we got to the point.
Barry probably would have ordered us to cart him down the street in togas like a roman emperor and feed him grapes while mom played the lyre as his first order. I would have kicked him in the balls, and the story would have ended there.
I agree that if you heard even the subtle things Adam started off with like showing him our tits, you might wonder what mom and sister would do that just to win a bet with each other?
The kind of mother and sister that even when confronted by the rest of the family continued standing naked at the table and smirked at each other while pulling their ass cheeks apart. The kind that pretended not to see the problem with it or understand why they were doing it. I was proud that my mom was willing to go that far! I really didn’t think it would ever escalate to this. I was not going to stop if she wasn’t!
"I am not standing here because Adam told me to do it, Murray," my mom lied straight to my Dad's face with a broad smile on her face like some contented Stepford Wife.
"Why are you doing it then?" Dad asked with his mouth full while he picked up some bread and dunked it in gravy and ate that before he finished the food he already had in his mouth.
"I..I..don't know?" My mom pretended to have no idea why she was standing in the nude. She looked at me as if she suddenly realized what she was doing and was shocked.
"I don't know either," I admitted. We had just agreed upstairs that we would go with my suggestion that when asked why we were obeying Adam, we would pretend not to know why. I gave my mom an appreciative wink that she had established that nicely. I think we can see things in each other's faces that boys usually miss. She winked right back at me to acknowledge my appreciative suggestion.
"Are you two winking at each other?" Dad obviously noticed.
"What? No! I just can't rub my eyes because I have to hold my butt cheeks," Mom replied with tongue firmly planted in cheek. I think she wanted Dad to notice the wink. It gave her a chance to ask Adam about the orders he was giving her.
"That is because you are doing everything Adam tells you to do," Dad told her to knock it off.
"I make his breakfast, fold his laundry, draw his bath, bring him snacks whenever he tells me, but I do that for everybody," My mom did do a lot for us around the house. She never drew ME a bath, though. Barry's friends laughed when they heard Adam still takes baths.
Dad pointed out that Adam's requests weren't in the same realm as what she did for everybody else. "These are not normal," he said and called what we were doing absurd.
Mom pretended to be oblivious to what he was talking about. She said she'd prove she didn't have to do what Adam told her.
I was nervous. I didn't know where mom was going with this. If Adam gave her an order, was she going to ignore it? That would satisfy everyone that Adam wasn't really pulling our strings. Adam would realize the mind control didn't work. I assumed maybe she was going to pretend the tea had worn off.
"Adam, your father believes you tell me to do things that are not normal, and I have to do them. Would you PLEASE tell me to do something that isn't normal? I have no idea what he is talking about, but I have to know as well!" Mom said sternly. Mom told him to ask her to do something she had never done for him before. She told him to tell her to do something absurd by Murray's standards.
There was nothing in the accepted rules of mind-control that prevented a subject from being asked to be given an order. I was impressed that my mom confronted Adam and asked him to tell her what to do. It was as if she wasn't sure if he had power over her but wanted to find out for herself.
Adam might have told my mom to drop down on her knees and suck his dick if he was like most boys. Adam isn't like most boys.
"I've always wanted my own Robot-Daggit from Battlestar Galactica. Get down on the floor and behave like Muffit," he smiled anxiously.
I've never watched that dumb show, but even I knew Muffit belonged to a boy on the main ship. It was basically a cute shaggy dog with robot parts that they included on the show to market toy replicas to boys like Adam. I had seen the doll on Adam's shelf, and I knew Mom knew what it was. One year when Adam was six, he made a big stink about Santa bringing him a full-size robot, and mom bought him the small version instead. Adam wrote angry letters to Santa for months after that.
My mom blanked and pretended her brain was short-circuiting a little. "I have no idea what that is," My mom answered her son sweetly. She looked at my Dad triumphantly because she proved we don't have to obey him.
Dad didn't seem convinced because we were still naked for no apparent reason he could understand. It had only proved that mom could refuse an order if she didn't understand what she was asked to do.
"It's basically just sniffing around and pretending to be a dog," Adam explained.
Mom took a moment to process that and asked casually, "Would you mind if I pretend to be a cat instead?" she offered.
I assumed my mom was executing another one of our agreements. We agreed if he told us to do something impossible or that we simply couldn't do, we could offer to do something else instead. We felt it would maintain the illusion that we were trying to obey the orders we were given, but we provided an alternative.
Adam's eyes grew wide like he had just received a kitten as a pet. He turned to his friend Dave Kim excitedly. The schmucks bought my mom's question hook, line, and sinker. If they didn't, then Adam wouldn't have told her she could.
"Fantastic!" My mom pretended she had always wanted to crawl around on her own dining room floor in nothing but garters and stockings while everyone giggled at her. She pretended to lick her hands and wiggled her ass.
"You are still doing what the moron told you to do!!" My Dad demanded. He looked amused but still annoyed.
"No, Adam told me to be a Muppet," My mom probably intentionally confused the word Muffit with Muppet. In retrospect, the Dog on the show looked like one. "I asked if I could be a kitten instead. What is the big deal, Murray?" Mom asked with an indignant expression and a shrug that she was satisfied that she was not under anyone's influence or control.
"Kittens don't talk. They meow," Adam said while the other boys were cat-calling and laughing. My mom meowed cutely. I could see her face turning red, but she powered through it like a champion and brushed her body against Murray's leg.
"You still got his permission, though!" my Dad demanded an explanation.
"Meow," Mom looked up at him with bright wide eyes like could not help it. She pointed to the fridge and to the floor and made a slurping sound.
"Erica, get Mom a saucer of milk," Adam picked up on my mom's body language.
I walked into the kitchen. It was good. I had my back to everyone else because It allowed me to stifle my silent laughter at how incredibly humiliating it must be for my mom to brush against my Dad's leg.
When I returned, he was petting her head softly. He looked at me holding the saucer and shrugged. “Fine, don't understand what's going on. I am not going to get in between your mother and you when you start a thing!"
I didn’t address his comment but he was exactly right. We had started a thing! It was definitely on!
I bent at the waist and presented my ass to the boys behind me while I put the saucer under my mother's face. She put her nose right into the milk and lapped it up sweetly.
I stood back up and waited. I fully expected my brother would make me behave like a kitten now. The establishment clause we agreed to made it impossible for me to refuse if I wanted to continue this game. I was already thinking about pretending I had a tail and spraying his leg or scratching his eyes out when Dad started giggling.
He couldn't help himself. I have to admit it was pretty funny seeing my mom as a kitten. It was especially amusing since I wasn't doing the same thing.
Dad's laughter wasn't derisive or mocking, like when Mom performed her Flashdance routine in front of us. My mom behaved sultry and animalistic – like she loved being a cat and wanted him to play with her. She could have easily been Madonna in one of her sexy videos as she stretched and purred for him. She had a sexy glow about her. I knew she is my mom and I should say that it is gross but in that moment she was so committed to the role that I was jealous I wasn’t her.

Dad looked amused as a child-like expression spread across his big face. As it grew I could see years of pent up frustration and aggravation disappear from his brow. Years of watching us break lamps, ignore curfew, bicker and fight just vanished. I used to think my dad permanently looked like a man who just dropped a bowling ball on his foot while he was constipated. Dad looked ten years younger right then.
My Dad's favorite member of the family is our Dog Lucky. Lucky already began sniffing around my mom's ass, and she wasn't doing anything to shoo him away. It was only a matter of time before he'd give her pussy a lick. I scrunched my nose in disgust.
"You can probably lure a kitty upstairs with milk," I said over the laughing and chuckling. I was trying to be a 'team player' with my mom. Our deal was that we were supposed to be together in the common areas so that we are in this wicked little charade together.
However, at the moment, I was afraid Lucky might start humping my mom's leg, and I really didn't want to see that. Lucky is a great little dog, but he is as horny as Adam and Barry.
Dad didn't question my advice. He didn't even look at me. He reached down and picked up the saucer and held it out for her. "Come on, Kitty, come on," he giggled. He teased my mom up the stairs by offering her the milk as she crawled behind him and tried to paw at it. It was abundantly clear that my Dad was sexually turned on by mom's playful kitty-cat act. He slammed his bedroom door shut, and that was the last we saw of my mom that night.
My mom's abrupt departure left me naked with a room full of horny teenage boys and my grandfather! We all heard my father’s lusty laugh as he chased after. It wasn’t something we ever heard them do before. My parents were always discreet about their love life (if they even had one). I knew they weren’t coming back any time soon.
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THE GOLDBERGS – CONTROL ANYONE – GET A HEAD.