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Adam	By : kattanon Category: S through Z > The Shield Views: 1482 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own The Shield, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: - I don�t own any of the characters of The Shield, they all belong to Shawn Ryan and FX.
Adam Chapter 4

Adam sat in the middle of the hospital bed, on top of the covers, his knees drawn up to his chest, arms wrapped around his legs, his eyes watching the door. His was dressed in blue hospital scrubs his own clothes having been bagged and taken away at the first hospital, the one he�d been examined at, the memories of the examination making him shudder. Then, just when he�d thought he was being taken home, he�d been bundled into the back of a car and driven to Los Angeles and brought to this hospital. Feeling agitated, but trying to hide it Adam hugged his legs harder and worried his lower lip with his teeth. Taking a deep breath he tried to calm down, he didn�t want to be stuck with a needle and drugged again like he had been at the first hospital when he�d fought against the examination. The drugs had left him feeling woozy and sick. Focusing on the door he waited for Taylor to arrive and take him home, cause this was all a test, one of Taylor�s tests and he wasn�t going to fail this one. He�d be good and would wait until Taylor came for him.
He didn�t really want to, but Adam couldn�t stop himself from remembering the first time Taylor had tested him.

He lay in the bed on his side, his knees tucked up to his chest and tried to keep his expression neutral, tried not to let Taylor see the relief on his face because he knew that would piss Taylor off, Taylor liked him to smile. Watching Taylor get dressed Adam could feel his heart beginning to slow in his chest, the tightness in his muscles beginning to fade. Taylor�s mouth had only just covered his, the wet slick tongue had only just forced its way into his mouth, and Taylor�s hand had only just reached down between Adam�s legs before the tentative knock on the bedroom door. Taylor was annoyed at being disturbed, but apparently it was really important and couldn�t wait, so he was having to leave and Adam tried to keep the relief from his face.
He must have been successful because when Taylor turned towards him Adam didn�t see his expression darken any more than it already was, and Taylor would become furious if he thought Adam was being anything other than grateful for his attentions, or wasn�t enjoying what was being done to him. Just to be sure Adam sat up on the bed and smiled up at Taylor as he approached. There were days when his face ached from smiling so much.
"Don�t move, I won�t be long." Taylor instructed him with a thin smile.
Reaching down Taylor grabbed the hair at the back of his head pulling his head slightly back and to the right. The pain made Adam gasp and as his mouth opened Taylor leant down and claimed it. A sharp nip to Adam�s lower lip as he pulled away and straightened up left a coppery tang on Adam�s lips and a small trail of warm blood trickling from the broken skin down his chin. Taylor smirked down at him and then walked out of the room.
Adam flicked his tongue out over his lip and winced a little at the sting he felt. Reaching up he wiped at the blood on his chin and stared down at the smudge of red it left across his fingers. He knew Taylor had told him to stay put, but Adam knew there was still half a glass of wine on the table in the other room, he hadn�t had time to finish it before Taylor had ordered him to the bedroom. He could drink it down now and maybe it would help a little, make things a little blurred when Taylor came back. Adam liked his world to be a little blurred most of the time.
Slipping off the large bed Adam felt his toes sink into the thick pile of the cream carpet and pausing only to reach down and pull on the boxers he�d discarded when Taylor had told him to strip Adam walked into the next room. However, before he made it to the table his eyes settled on the door that led from his suite of rooms to the rest of the house, it was open. Not open all the way, but it was as if in his hurry Taylor hadn�t pulled it shut properly.
Adam froze for a moment staring at the door. He was torn, part of him wanted to turn away and scurry back to the bed, curl up there and wait for Taylor to come back. Wait for Taylor to touch him, pinching and pulling, wait for Taylor to kiss him, biting and licking, wait for Taylor to take him, merciless and hurting. Wait for Taylor to prove he was still alive, that he hadn�t been swallowed up by the darkness. Yet something else stirred in his head, someone else. The one that he�d pushed away in the dark. The one that he heard screaming in his mind sometimes when Taylor was pushing himself inside. The one that he tried so hard to ignore, to deny, so that Taylor wouldn�t cast him away down into the darkness again. That other voice in his head whispered about escape, about an old life, about being free.
Adam found himself by the door and hesitantly pulled it open a crack just so he could look out. The corridor was deserted, but he didn�t know how long that would last, how long it would be before Taylor returned. Running to his room he quickly pulled on his pants and sweater. His heart was hammering in his chest, his mouth dry from a mixture of fear and excitement.
Back at the door Adam cautiously pulled it open and stepped out into the quiet corridor. He�d only been allowed out of his room a couple of times, but he knew the stairs to the ground floor were down the corridor and to the left. Running quickly he pressed himself back against the wall and peaked around the corner when he reached the end of the corridor. He was in luck there was no one present and he ran down the stairs as fast as he could, while also trying to be as quiet as he could. The large wooden front door was locked, but he knew there were large French windows that led out into the grounds in a room that Taylor used as a study. Adam had been there a few weeks previously, some fantasy Taylor had wanted to satisfy about taking him bent over his desk.
Once he reached the study door Adam paused, Taylor could be in there right now. Pressing his ear up against the door Adam held his breath as he strained to listen for any sounds coming from the room. He cursed silently at the roar of blood in his ears and the thud of his heartbeat that he was sure was so loud it could be heard fifty feet away. Hearing nothing it took every ounce of courage Adam had left to reach out and open that door. Relief flooded through him, making his knees wobble a little when he found the room empty.
Crossing to the open French windows Adam looked out across the immaculately kept lawn towards a grove of trees and perhaps even the glimpse of a grey stone wall that lay beyond. Over that wall lay an end to his nightmare, over that wall lay an end to Adam, over that wall lay the other person, the person he should be.
Seeing and hearing no one in the garden Adam stepped out into the sunlight. He hadn�t been out of the house for a long time and couldn�t resist hesitating for a moment to close his eyes and face the sun. To feel the warmth of it on his skin, the fresh breeze brushing by him, the smells of flowers and freshly cut grass in the air. All these things whispered "freedom" inside his mind and without waiting any longer he took his first tentative steps out of the house. The sharp gravel of the pathway that ran next to the house cut into the bottoms of his unprotected feet, but Adam didn�t care ignoring their bite. Five steps and he felt the short, soft grass under his feet, between his toes, cooling, soothing.
"I thought I told you not to move Adam?"
The familiar, cold voice came from his left and Adam froze. His blood feeling like liquid nitrogen in his veins, his guts turning to ice. A whimper rose up in his throat and he had to clench his teeth tightly together to stop it escaping from his mouth.
Turning he saw Taylor standing by the side of the house flanked by two of his big thugs. For the first time in his life Adam truly understood the phrase "like a deer caught in the headlights", because that was exactly how he felt. Everything in him, every instinct was screaming at him to run. He could feel the adrenaline flooding his bloodstream, encouraging the instinctive fight or flight response. His mouth went dry; his heart was hammering in his chest, the muscles in his thighs twitched wanting to move, to flee. He didn�t move. Taylor�s eyes locked with his and Adam felt his brain shut down in panic and fear. He was primed to run, but his brain refused to give the commands to his nerves, to his muscles, so he stood as still as a statue.
Taylor smiled, and slowly began walking towards him and still Adam couldn�t move.
"Tut, tut, Adam." Taylor said softly as he approached him shaking his head. "I�m disappointed in you�really disappointed. You failed my little test. I wanted to see what you�d do�if you were loyal, and look what you�ve done�you�ve betrayed me."
Taylor was standing right in front of him and Adam flinched back as Taylor reached out his right hand. He expected a blow but what Taylor did was some how worse, more painful. Seeing Adam�s reaction Taylor paused for a second before finishing his gesture, reaching out and stroking his fingers down the side of Adam�s face. Down his cheek, along his jaw, one finger stroking it�s way along his lower lip,
"Please�" Adam heard himself whimper unable to keep silent any longer.
Taylor stopped moving and leant forward whispering in his ear,
"Sshh."
As Taylor pulled back Adam shivered as he felt Taylor�s breath ghosting across his cheek like a caress. Taylor�s fingers continued moving until he suddenly grabbed Adam�s chin in a bruising grip.
"Now I�m going to have to punish you."
Taylor suddenly released him and stepped back snapping his fingers to signal his two goons to move in. Each grabbed one of Adam�s arms and began to drag him back towards the French windows.
Adam wanted to fight, to struggle, to escape, but he felt all the strength drain out of him as pure terror took over. They had moved past Taylor, but he was following them into the house and Adam tried to twist around to look at him.
"Please, please no, Taylor�I�m sorry, I�m sorry�please. I�ll be good I promise�" Adam begged.
As he was dragged past the stairs which led back up towards his suite of rooms and towards the doorway to the cellar his terror increased, and he finally began to struggle in earnest, but it wasn�t enough. The grip on his upper arms increased, the thick, stubby fingers feeling as if they were burrowing through his flesh down to the bone.
"No�no Taylor please, please�I�m sorry�not that please�" Adam babbled as tears began to flow down his cheeks, but he was so far gone in his fear that he didn�t even notice and was far past caring about little things like dignity or stoicism. Adam knew what waited for him beyond the cellar door, and he would do anything not to have to go down there. "I won�t do it again�I was stupid�please forgive me. Taylor I�ll do anything you want me to�anything�please."
They paused at the cellar door, and for one moment Adam thought that perhaps Taylor was going to show mercy, was going to spare him but he should�ve known better.
Taylor moved to stand in front of Adam and slowly unlocked the cellar door.

The involuntary whimper that escaped Adam�s lips when he remembered what happened next broke through the memory and he felt a wave of relief rush through him as he found himself not at the cellar door but curled up on a bed in the middle of a brightly lit hospital room. Feeling the heat of unshed tears pricking at the back of his eyes Adam squeezed his eyes shut and began to whisper over and over,
"I�ll be good. I�ll be good. I�ll be good�"
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Adam