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Sheldon Cooper, P.I.	By : MariaTeresaQuintanar Category: 1 through F > The Big Bang Theory Views: 2777 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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Here's chapter six everyone!
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Chapter Six

            Sheldon and I walked into the interrogation room. The tall Texan pulled out the chair for me. And as I made myself comfortable, Sheldon sat down to my left. Leonard looked on in amazement as to his gangly roommate’s gentlemanly behavior. The stunned silence wasn’t to last.
            “What’s going on here?” he demanded. “I’ve been arrested by the FBI! Come on guys! Enough is enough! Stop pretending to be private investigators and tell these guys it’s a game!”
            That had me looking over to Sheldon, who nodded. I looked back over to Leonard. “It’s not a game and you should know as much by now given the fact that you had a hand in not only the theft of a three million dollar piece of equipment—which by the way was found under your bed—but the attempted murder of two people.”
            Leonard swallowed compulsively and muttered, “I had nothing to do with it.” He started sweating. “You can’t expect me to believe that you took on Howard as a client, even if anything you have to say about you two being detectives is true.”
            “Well, technically, Howard was a client,” I murmured. “Technically. But, really our client was N.A.S.A.” His eyes fairly bugged out at those words. “They had been experiencing multiple cases of industrial theft throughout different projects. They had asked us to keep an eye out on Howard to make certain nothing happened there. When it did, it was just a matter of convincing Howard of ‘allowing’ us to be the ones to find the three million dollar flusher thingy.”
            “Thingy isn’t the technical word,” Sheldon complained.
            “No it isn’t, but seeing as we’re nearly done with the case and I never bothered to learn the real name, I don’t care,” I replied. Turning back to Leonard, I asked him, “Do you know what I really love about the modern age we’re in?”
            “No, what?” he asked flatly.
            “Just about everything you want to know is within reach thanks to the Internet,” I said to him. “If you know how to look and if you have someone as brilliant as Sheldon, the information is right there for the grabbing.” Sheldon held out a paper to me. I took it and read, “Priya works for the law firm of Jackson, Wilson and Beck. They work internationally out of several different countries, including India. No shock there, huh?” He shrugged, but said nothing. “One of the clients of her firm is Rap Yai Industrial out of New Deli.” I handed the paper to Leonard. “In fact, it’s her only client. Why am I pointing this out? Because it doesn’t exist.” I pointed to the paper. “The name of the company is a jumble of her own first name!” I looked to Sheldon. “Even I spotted that one.”
            He nodded to that and handed me another paper.
            Leonard was shaking as he looked at the paper in his hands. “This proves…”
            “It’s a link,” Sheldon said quietly. “One of many, I assure you. Now listen to Penny.”
            Leonard looked back over to me. “I get why she did it. The money. What I don’t understand, and perhaps you can explain, is why you had a hand in it.”
            “I didn’t…”
            I stopped him, holding up my hand. “You were in the optimal spot to see every move by every person involved.” I looked to Sheldon who nodded, making me smile. “I used the word optimal right. Cool.” I shook that off and went on with, “You knew that Howard was dating Bernadette, you knew that he was going to be taking her on a tour of the school, and you knew that Barry Krypke had set it up so that Bernadette would have him out of his lab for more than enough time to hide the flusher.”
            “I did not!”
            “Who do you think pointed out Bernadette to Krypke, Sheldon?” I inquired.
            “Leonard.” He took out a paper and put it in front of his roommate. “A copy of last month’s phone bill. You made quite a few phone calls to a certain phone sex…”
            He grabbed it up and squawked in protest, “I haven’t even seen this bill yet! How…”
            “I told you,” I said to him. “If it’s out there, Sheldon can find it.” Leonard looked up at me, his eyes going hard. “You arranged for Krypke to hire Bernadette to keep Howard out of the lab. You knew when Krypke was going to take the flusher and you beat him to the punch.”
            “I-I…” I handed him the paper I had. Taking it, he groaned.
            “You know for a thief to use his own security card to get into a highly monitored lab to steal something isn’t the brightest thing to do,” I murmured. “Twenty minutes after Howard left and fifteen before Krypke swiped in to find it already missing, we have you checking in.” Not only was there a time and location on the paper, but a picture of Leonard swiping in.
            Leonard crushed the paper in his hands, anger dancing over his face.
            “Krypke became angry when he discovered that flusher missing,” I went on. “Really angry. He thought that Bernadette had betrayed him, but then he thought of you. You had suggested Bernadette, as a diversion after all. You even knew his plan, as he may had inadvertently revealed some of it to you. And that’s when he became a very big liability for you.” I looked up at a monitor that came to life above the table, revealing a bruised and battered Barry Krypke in another interview room, telling them everything he knew about Leonard’s involvement in the theft of the space flusher and ultimately how he proceeded to beat the crap out of him.
            “He went mad!” Barry exclaimed. “It was tewefying!”
            I looked back to Leonard. He yanked his own glasses off, his knuckles going white with how hard of fists he was making.
            “Was it the money?” I asked. “Or was it the promise of something more with Priya?” Sheldon put his hand on my arm. Blinking, I murmured, “I got ahead! Sorry, sweetie.” He nodded and handed me another piece of paper. “He hates it when I diverge from the plan of attack.” I smiled and inquired, “Now where was I?”
            “Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler,” Sheldon murmured.
            “Yeah! Thanks,” I replied. “What you didn’t count on was Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. For what reason I have yet to understand, she was doing social observations of our group. Which in short means you had someone making acute observations and recordings of what you and Priya were up to. She was an unknown and it scared Priya, didn’t it?”
            “Uh…No…Well…No…She…she…” Leonard stammered, but couldn’t get anything out.
            “Leonard, you can’t hit the broad side of a barn with an elephant rifle.” He broke his glasses at my words. “She was the one to do the shooting, but you were driving that car, weren’t you?”
            Sheldon passed me a cotton swab within a test tube. I pulled it out and went over to Leonard, swabbing the inside of his nose quickly and put it back into the tube of liquid. I shook it, turning the liquid pink.
            I held it out to Leonard. “Congratulations! You’re positive.”
            “You have just tested positive for inhalation of gun powder,” Sheldon explained to the man across from him. “Test two, Penny.” I snapped right by his right ear and he didn’t flinch. I did it by his left and he turned towards it.
            “You need your hearing tested,” I told him. “Sometimes when a gun is fired within a closed up area, like a car, and the people there don’t protect their ears, they can cause damage to the hearing.” I sat back down across from him. “With any luck it’s temporary. It never pays to have poor hearing in prison.”
            “That proves…that proves…” Leonard stammered, but said nothing more.
            “Now can I ask?” I inquired of Sheldon, who nodded. I looked back to Leonard. “Why did you do it? It wasn’t for the money, was it?”
            “Partly,” he admitted in a soft voice, sounding resigned. “Mostly I did it to…to get Sheldon to confess that all this detective bullshit was a game to him.” He pursed his lips, glaring at the man next to me. “This can’t be real! He’s a theoretical physicist, not Sherlock Holmes!”
            “At first, I must tell you it was mostly a hobby,” Sheldon said. “I had become stuck once more and I needed to do something to untangle it. Penny had suggested a puzzle. But it had been either too simple a task or just too uninspiring in nature.”
            “But then it happened,” I said. “Our first client.”
            “We aren’t allowed to speak of them,” hissed Sheldon.
            “I could say just that much,” I told him. “I made sure.”
            “Oh, okay.” He relaxed at that.
            “I drove him around, helped out where I could, and was his bodyguard. Then I got paid doing it? Bonus!”
            Clenching his teeth he muttered, “When did you start sleeping with him?”
            “Right after that first case,” I answered, making Leonard’s eye twitch. “What can I say? He’s the brain, I’m the body—sooner or later they’re going to join up.”
            “Lovely analogy,” Sheldon whispered.
            “Thank you, sweetie.” I looked to Leonard. “Priya shot her, didn’t she?”
            “Yes,” he hissed.
            “And she was going to pay you for your part?” I went on.
            “Yes, tonight,” he muttered. “What does he have that I don’t?” he demanded.
            “Not now,” Sheldon told him. “We need the answers first.”
            “Tonight?” I thought that over. “Where?”
            “On a date,” he said. “Why? Jealous?”
            “No. Curious,” I admitted. “Where was this date going to be?”
            “I don’t know. She said it was going to be a surprise.”
            Leaning over to Sheldon, I breathed, “I wonder just how surprised he would be.”
            Frowning he murmured, “Meaning?”
            “She had the gun in her possession, right?”
            Sitting up straight, he replied, “Correct.” He looked to Leonard. “She was going to kill you!”
            Leonard looked from him to me. “That’s a lie!”
            “You are her loose end!” I told him. “To her, you’re expendable as any other in her way. And you’ve seen what she does when that happens, right?”
            He was sweating again. “Shit.” He swallowed hard. “Shit!”
            Sheldon handed a paper and a pen to Leonard. “Write it all out and perhaps you might just get a few years less.”
            Leonard scribbled madly and handed the paper over to Sheldon. Looking back over to me, he asked, “Why Sheldon? He-he’s not even human!”
            “Oh trust me,” I said standing. “He’s very human and in all the right ways.” I looked over to a blushing Sheldon. “Pardon me, sweetie. I’m going to be a little crude here in a moment or two.”
            He nodded.
            I looked over to Leonard. “The difficulty in starting a relationship with a man with as high of an I.Q. as Sheldon is that women don’t know to take the time to engage his most complex sexual organ correctly— and by this I mean his mind.” Leonard looked at me in shock. “It’s true. The first time I read him ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ he went off like a rocket!”
            What I didn’t tell Leonard was that I had been nude at the time and Sheldon was tied to my bed. Yeah, none of his business.
            “Just one last thing before we go…” I leaned down and whispered into Leonard’s ear, “You may have tapped this ass, but Sheldon will continue to do so better than you ever could.” Standing up, I looked down at the bloodless face of the man I had once thought I cared for. “When you’re in jail, you might want to work on those ‘Mommy issues’ of yours.” I waved and walked out of the room.
            I watched from the doorway, as Sheldon just stared at him for a time. “Your faith in my abilities as a man underwhelm me.”
            “She was mine…” Leonard choked out.
            “Was,” Sheldon repeated. “Was yours.” Picking up the last of his papers, he added, “Now she’s mine. Goodbye, Leonard.”

TBC...
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And there's another chapter down. Hold on though! The epilogue is just around the corner!
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Sheldon Cooper, P.I.