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Missing Persons case file Matteron Reese Drillbit	By : DS197245 Category: 1 through F > The Big Bang Theory Views: 58 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Warning! Exploitation and crime involved! Reader discretion is advised!

Chapter List
- 5
- 6
- 7
Chapter 6
I put on for my city, on-on for my city
I put on for my city, on-on for my city
Put on(Eastside)
Put on(Southside)
Put on(Westside)
Put on, let’s go
‘ What the?!’, Penny, Amy and Bernadette thought as they suddenly woke up the next morning in their Las Vegas hotel room to hear the sound of running water and their friend Matteron’s ipod playing the song Put On by Jeezy feat. Kanye West in the bathroom. Penny rolled her eyes as she got out of bed and went to the bathroom door to knock on it.
Knock knock! “ Matteron Reese what the hell are you doing in there?!”
“ I’m taking a shower and listening to music Penny! What does it sound like to you?!”, Matteron interjected over the running water from inside the bathroom.
“ I don’t know but why are you listening to a Jeezy song at like 10 o’clock in the morning?!”
“ Because it’s a good song and it’s got a good beat to it! Why else would you think I’d be listening to it?!”, Matteron interjected.
“ Yeah we get it but Penny, Bernadette and I were still sleeping out here! Your music woke us up!”
“ Oh sh*t I am so sorry Dr. Fowler, I didn’t realize my music was too loud! Here, I’ll turn it down some!”, Matteron interjected as she got out of the shower for a quick second and turned her ipod volume down a few notches before she got back in the shower.
“ That’s ok, thanks!”
“ Just warn us next time when you’re going to do that please!”
“ Will do Dr. Rostenkowski-Wolowitz!”, Matteron interjected. The three women then just shook their heads laughing as Matteron continued taking her shower doing the same thing that they were doing too. Then once Matteron was out of the shower and dressed her friends then each took turns taking a shower as well and once they were all ready for the day they decided to go shopping at the many malls that Las Vegas had. One of the things they did with each other was they tried on some clothes and then act like they were in a fashion show using the narrow hallway of the fitting rooms as a runway in front of a big mirror at the end of the hallway. They would each do it individually and all 4 of them would do it at the same time causing others to stare at them as if they were nuts.
“ This is awesome! I love this! Just me and my girl friends hanging out with no annoying interruptions!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ Yeah you said it! This is fire, bitches!”, Penny exclaimed.
“ I so love Las Vegas!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ I told you you’d love it!”, Amy exclaimed as she bumped her fist against Matteron’s.
“ Girl friends selfie!”, Bernadette exclaimed as she took her phone out of her purse and the 4 of them began taking several selfies of themselves with random poses and stupid facial expressions which made them laugh so hard that they almost fell over landing on top of each other.
“ Damn it I love you Matteron! You’re funny!”, Penny laughed as she pointed at Matteron and playfully slapped her shoulder.
“ Well so are you Penny! All three of you are! You crack me up! Man I am so glad we’re friends!”, Matteron laughed as she threw her finger around at Penny, Amy and Bernadette.
“ We are too!”, Penny, Bernadette and Amy laughed.
“ I’m getting hungry. Let’s get out of these clothes and go get something to eat.”, Matteron said as she started to calm down.
“ Now that you mention it I’m getting a little hungry too.”, Amy said.
“ Same here.”, Penny said.
“ We can go to the food court if you guys want to.”, Bernadette said.
“ Yeah let’s go to the food court.”, Penny, Matteron, Amy and Bernadette said together as they took off the clothes they were trying on, put their clothes back on and left the store walking out into the mall area after they put the clothes they had tried on back on the racks before they headed to the food court to get some food. Amy and Bernadette both got salads while Penny got a turkey sandwich with cheese on it and Matteron got a basket of fried shrimp with cocktail sauce. She also got french fries with it as well as a strawberry milkshake.
“ Well we must all have good food because none of us are saying anything.”, Matteron said as she dipped a piece of shrimp in the cocktail sauce and ate it.
“ Yeah that’s true. Amy and I both have really good salads and Penny looks like she has a really good sandwich.”, Bernadette said as she took a bite of her salad.
“ Oh it’s not just good Bernadette it’s delicious. How’s your shrimp Matteron?”, Penny asked as she took a bite of her sandwich.
“ Oh it’s really good, especially with this cocktail sauce. It’s phenomenal.”, Matteron said as she ate another shrimp piece with the cocktail sauce.
“ Really? Let me taste it.”, Penny said as she grabbed a piece of shrimp, dipped it in the cocktail sauce and ate it. Her eyes immediately went wide as she exclaimed, “ Ok shut up! That is seriously delicious! I don’t think I’ve ever tasted a shrimp and cocktail that good in my entire life before! That seriously tasted like it came from a gourmet seafood restaurant!”
“ Really?! Ok I got to try it too.”, Amy said as she took a piece of shrimp dipping it in the cocktail sauce.
“ Same here.”, Bernadette said as she took one as well. When they both ate their pieces of shrimp with the sauce their eyes went wide as well.
“ Oh my god, yeah that is good!”, Amy exclaimed.
“ Yeah I completely agree! Where did you get this from Matteron?!”, Bernadette exclaimed.
“ I got it from that seafood shack over there!”, Matteron said as she pointed at the cute little shack that was sitting in one corner of the food court.
“ Ok we are so getting some of this to take back to the hotel to eat later! That is seriously so good!”, Penny exclaimed as she pointed at the shrimp basket that her friend was eating.
“ Well if you guys want to get some then I say go right ahead! I don’t mind eating it twice today!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ Yeah let’s all finish our food and then go get some shrimp.”, Bernadette said.
“ Sounds like a plan to me Dr. Rostenkowski-Wolowitz.”, Matteron said.
“ Yeah but aren’t we going to continue shopping first before we get it? Because if we got it now we would have to walk all the way back to the hotel, drop it off and then come back which really wouldn’t make much sense from a logical stand point.”, Amy said as she gestured her hands.
“ Yeah you got a point there Amy. Let’s just continue shopping and then when we’re ready to leave the mall we can come back to the food court and pick up some shrimp to take with us.”, Penny said.
“ Yeah that sounds like a better plan to me.”, Matteron said as she nodded her head. They finished eating and got up to go mill around the mall some more but little did they know that someone watching them from behind an artificial plant near the entrance of a store. He was about 40 years old, caucasian, with an average body build and he too was dressed like an evil mad scientist. He was a very good friend of Dr. Bryceton Farkle Gunderson whose name was Dr. Desmond David Brine. As he watched the 4 women walk away he saw Matteron look over her shoulder at least a couple times before she turned back around and continued walking away with her friends. This made a sinister smile spread across his face.
“ Yeah that’s right Turtle MayLee Gunderson just keep looking over your shoulder because you’re not going to know what’s going to hit you, at least not yet.”, Dr. Brine evilly said to himself as he let out a slight evil laugh.
Beep beep!
“ Dr. Brine here, what is it?”, Dr. Brine evilly asked as he held a walkie talkie in his hand.
“ What the f*ck do you mean what is it Desmond?! Did you find Turtle like I asked you to?!”, Dr. Gunderson hissed from the other end through a walkie talkie that he somehow stole from the feds.
“ Yes I did Bryceton! She’s in Las Vegas with the other three bi*ches!”, Dr. Brine hissed.
“ You mean Penny, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler and Dr. Bernadette MaryAnn Rostenkowski-Wolowitz?!”, Dr. Gunderson hissed.
“ Yes she’s here with them! It appears that they’re hanging out with each other! What do you want me to do?!”, Dr. Brine hissed.
“ I don’t care what you have to do! I just want my daughter back! And if it means taking these three women out then so be it! I ain’t letting these fools turn my daughter into a preturd! Just get her back and then come back to California and look for an apartment complex and apartment at 2311 North Los Robles Avenue Apartment 4A! Because that’s where two clownish scientists named Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper and his stupid roommate/best friend Dr. Leonard Leaky Hofstadter live!”, Dr. Gunderson hissed.
“ And then what do you want me to do?!”, Dr. Brine hissed.
“ I want you to kill them is what I want to you to do! And then when you’re done killing them I want you to kill Maren and William Drillbit and their two stupid children Micah and Savannah! I don’t want these 4 interfering with my plans ever again and that includes everyone else that my daughter is associating with!”, Dr. Gunderson hissed.
“ You want me to commit mass murder?!”, Dr. Brine hissed.
“ Yes! I want you to kill every single last one of those idiots! They’re going to pay for putting me in federal prison for the rest of my life! They’re all dead, especially Dr. Cooper! He’s a real thorn in my side that needs to be eliminated, PERMANENTLY! So if you can kill him and then cremate him to ashes that would be good enough for me!”, Dr. Gunderson hissed.
“ Alright I’ll do whatever you want Bryceton!”, Dr. Brine hissed.
“ Thank you Desmond, now GO! Do not screw this up! I want my daughter alive and unharmed or else I will HAVE YOUR HEAD! Do you hear me?!”, Dr. Gunderson hissed.
“ Yes I hear you! Ok goodbye!”, Dr. Brine hissed as he put the walkie talkie away and decided to secretly follow the 4 women around the mall. He at first followed them for a few minutes before he made his first move. He committed some kind of blitz style attack causing them to suddenly scream when Penny, Amy and Bernadette were suddenly knocked to the floor unconscious and Dr. Brine grabbed Matteron running away with her.
“ Let go of me you morron! What are you doing?!”, Matteron screamed in terror as she started to fight her way to get away from him.
“ Just shut up and let’s go Turtle!”, Dr. Brine shouted as he was jerking her away with him.
“ That is not my name, it’s Matteron! Who the hell are you?!”, Matteron screamed.
“ Dr. Desmond David Brine! I’m a friend of your father’s!”, Dr. Brine shouted.
“ Dr. Bryceton Farkle Gunderson is not my real father and I am not Turtle MayLee Gunderson! I never was! It’s Matteron Reese Drillbit! That’s my real name and my real parents are Maren Yvett Drillbit and Air Force Lt. William James Drillbit! I have a brother and sister now too but you don’t care about that do you?!”, Matteron screamed as she started elbowing him very hard in the chest to get him to release her.
“ Stop it with the lies! You know who you truly are! You’re a villain just like your father!”, Dr. Brine shouted.
“ NO I AM NOT AND HE IS NOT MY FATHER! I TOLD YOU WHO MY REAL FATHER WAS! DON’T ACT ALL STUPID! SOMEBODY HELP ME!”, Matteron screamed.
“ Oh HELL no! Where do you think you’re going with our friend?! Get back here buddy! Amy get him!”, Penny suddenly screamed when her and the other two women came to and started running after the scientist who was dragging their friend away. The song Makes Me Wonder by Maroon 5 started playing in the background.
“ Come here pal you’re going to get a big whoppin’ coffee can change purse right in your big fat face!”, Amy screamed as she was swinging her purse around like a wagon wheel.
“ Oh son of a bitch just shut up and hit him Amy!”, Bernadette screamed.
“ I don’t think so! How about I hit you?!”, Dr. Brine shouted as he intercepted Amy’s attack on him and smack it back at her which hit her in the nose knocking her back into Penny’s and Bernadette’s arms.
“ Oh I’m so going Nebraska on your a** now! This is what you get for hurting my best friend, punk!”, Penny shouted as she threw a punch at his face.
“ Not going to happen! You’ll be dead soon enough along with all of your stupid friends, especially that weird nerd friend of yours!”, Dr. Brine shouted as he grabbed her wrist and twisted it.
“ Oh you touch Sheldon too and you’ll be kissing the dirt! No one messes with him, EVER! I’ll bust you up into the next century if you so much as lay a hand on him! You’ll basically be asking to die!”, Penny shouted.
“ Nice try but not enough!”, Dr. Brine shouted as he kicked her in the stomach and shoved her to the floor.
“ Look you d*ckhead we don’t even know who the hell you are!”, Bernadette shouted as her and Amy helped Penny stand up.
“ Well why don’t I just tell you ladies! The name’s Dr. Desmond David Brine! I’m a friend of Dr. Bryceton Farkle Gunderson!”, Dr. Brine shouted.
“ WHAT?!”, Amy, Bernadette and Penny shouted in complete shock.
“ Oh you are so dead now! You’re deader than a door nail! Yippie ki-yay asshole!”, Penny shouted as she lashed out at him with Amy and Bernadette ganging up on him as well just whacking him with their purses with Amy’s making a clunking sound with each hit considering the fact that the coffee can of change was still in her purse that she still hadn’t taken to the bank yet.
“ Matteron! Go get help now! Run!”, Penny screamed at her friend.
“ Oh you don’t have to tell me twice Penny! I’m on it! See ya Dr. Brainless!”, Matteron shouted as she kicked Dr. Brine in the groin really hard causing him to release her as she started to sprint away to get some help for her and her friends who were still beating the crap out of the scientist.
“ It’s Dr. Brine! Get back here you little brat!”, Dr. Brine shouted as he broke free from the three womens’ grip on him and started running after Matteron causing the three of them to immediately run after him with Penny shouting, “ Oh no you touch her and you’re going down to the Nebraskan Rodeo!”
“ Yeah get back here you jerk! We’re not done with you!”, Amy shouted.
“ Matteron keep running! Don’t let this guy get you!”, Bernadette shouted.
“ Oh to hell I won’t Dr. Rostenkowski-Wolowitz! I ain’t going missing again, no way no how! Somebody help us! Call the police and the FBI!”, Matteron shouted. As the very intense chase began to get underway with the women screaming and shouting a witness nearby pulled their phone out and called 9-1-1. The chase then lead itself outside the mall into the streets and shortly after that was when news crews began to get involved broadcasting the whole incident from the air with news choppers all over the television which immediately caught Sheldon and Leonard’s attention as well as the attention of Mr. and Mrs. Drillbit and Micah and Savannah who were all watching tv this very moment back in California when the news interrupted them.
“ Breaking news, we have an intense situation taking place on the streets of Las Vegas. A chase has suddenly broken out from the Vegas Strip mall leading to the streets which appears to involve 4 young women and a middle-aged male who looks to be in his 40s and dressed like a mad scientist. Witnesses at the scene believe that this is an attempted kidnapping in progress perpetrated by the male who they think that they heard that his name was Dr. Desmond David Brine, a friend of Dr. Bryceton Farkle Gunderson who is currently in federal custody awaiting trial for the kidnapping and exploitation of Matteron Reese Drillbit when she was just 3 years old. Witnesses believe that this is Matteron that is being chased by Brine and the other three women chasing him are believed to be friends of hers who appear to be trying to subdue him. Las Vegas Police officials as well as FBI agents are being dispatched to the scene at this time…”, a news reporter from a news station reported on the images that were being broadcasted all over the tv. As she continued to speak Sheldon shrieked, “ Oh good Lord! That Brine punk is dead! He’s trying to kidnap my girlfriend! Leonard we need to get back to Vegas now!”
“ Oh for God sakes you don’t have to tell me twice Sheldon! Let’s pick up Raj, Howard and Stuart on the way too!”, Leonard shrieked.
“ I completely agree with you my good man, let’s go!”, Sheldon shrieked as the two of them ran out of the apartment slamming the door behind them.
Drillbit home…
“ William get the car now! We’re going to Vegas! Our baby’s in trouble!”, Mrs. Drillbit shrieked as she jumped off the couch.
“ Oh I hear you Maren! Everybody in the car now! Micah, Savannah, get your shoes on and let’s go! We’re going to get your sister!”, Mr. Drillbit shouted as he quickly grabbed his keys to the family car and the 4 of them raced to the garage after Micah and Savannah threw their shoes on with lightning speed. As they were speeding down the highway towards Vegas their car was suddenly met up with Leonard’s car which consisted of Leonard, Sheldon, Howard, Raj and Stuart after the two physicists had stopped to pick them up on their way out of town.
“ Oh thank goodness there’s Dr. Hofstadter’s car! William follow him! Don’t lose sight of him!”, Mrs. Drillbit shouted as she pointed at Leonard’s car that was next to and slightly in front of them.
“ Well I would if he would pull forward a bit so I can weave in behind him! Call Dr. Cooper and tell him to tell Dr. Hofstadter to pull forward so I can get behind him!”, Mr. Drillbit shouted.
“ Ok ok just chill out William!”, Mrs. Drillbit shouted as she took her phone out of her purse and dialed Sheldon’s number.
“ Hello?!”, Sheldon shrieked when he answered it.
“ Dr. Cooper it’s Maren Drillbit! William and I are right behind you guys with Micah and Savannah in the car! Tell Dr. Hofstadter to pull his car forward a bit so we can follow you guys!”, Mrs. Drillbit screamed.
“ I will most certainly do that! Leonard pull forward so the Drillbits can follow us!”, Sheldon shrieked into his phone before screaming at Leonard.
“ Ok ok stop screaming at me Sheldon!”, Leonard hissed as he sped his car up just enough for Mr. Drillbit to weave his car in behind him.
“ Ok we’re good! Thank you!”, Mrs. Drillbit screamed.
“ My pleasure, see you there in Vegas!”, Sheldon shrieked before he hung up.
The Las Vegas Strip…
“ Get the f*ck away from me Dr. Brine! You ain’t taking me without a fight!”, Matteron screamed in terror as she kept running away with sweat dripping down her face.
“ Just shut your mouth Turtle MayLee Gunderson! You can’t run away from your true destiny!”, Dr. Brine shouted as he kept chasing her with Penny, Amy and Bernadette still running after him screaming and shouting at him.
“ You shut up and stop calling me that! How many times do I have to tell you that’s NOT MY NAME?! I’m through with a life of crime and I don’t want anything to do with it ever again! I never should have been a part of it in the first place because it RUINED MY LIFE! You need to go away and leave me alone! You’re not going to touch me, my family, my friends and especially my boyfriend! You ever touch him too and I’m going to kick your motherf*cking a** you sick, twisted scuzzbucket!”, Matteron shouted.
“ Why you little…!”, Dr. Brine shouted but before he could do anything Matteron suddenly stopped running, spun around and started beating him up while singing the chorus of No Scrubs by TLC which shocked her friends but then they started joining in thinking that it would do something to make the situation better over the noise of the news choppers in the sky.
“ What is this?! You think this is funny?! Stop this or I’m gonna…!”, Dr. Brine shouted but Amy shouted, “ Shut up Dr. Brine! That’s enough lip out of you!” as she hammered her fist on the dead center of his head.
“ Oh you are dead for that Dr. Fowler!”, Dr. Brine shouted.
“ I don’t think so! Coffee can change purse!”, Amy shouted as she whacked him square in the nose with her purse knocking him flat on his back on the ground. But just when they thought that he had been subdued he suddenly sprang up from the ground and pulled out a firearm pointing it at the 4 women with his finger on the trigger as a sinister smile began to spread across his face.
“ Oh my god! He’s got a gun! He’s gonna kill us!”, Matteron screamed and then gasped when he suddenly grabbed her and started pointing the gun at Penny, Bernadette and Amy instead placing his other hand over her mouth to muffle her screams.
“ Matteron!”, the other three women screamed.
“ Mmmmm! Mmmmm! Mmmmm!”, Matteron’s muffled screams rang out underneath Dr. Brine’s hand as she tried to get away from him.
“ End of the line ladies! You’re little play time’s over! Now you’re gonna die! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!”, Dr. Brine evilly laughed but just before he could do anything else he was suddenly shot in the back with a sniper rifle by an approaching FBI agent who shouted, “ Freeze mister! Get on the ground now with your hands behind your head! You’re under arrest!” as several other agents and police officers approached the scene as well with their firearms in their hands. Even though Dr. Brine was wounded he was still conscious enough to comply with their orders and slowly placed his hands on the back of his head. He was then slapped with handcuffs behind his back and taken away into custody just as the Drillbits were showing up to the scene with Sheldon, Leonard, Raj, Howard and Stuart too running across the grass. Matteron was laying a few feet away in the grass after Dr. Brine had let go of her from the impact of the bullet hitting his back.
“ Matteron! Matteron!”, Mrs. Drillbit screamed as she ran to her daughter.
“ Mom!”, Matteron screamed as she shot up to her feet and ran towards her mother collapsing into her arms crying like a baby.
“ Dr. Brine tried to kidnap me and kill my friends but I wouldn’t let him! Oh god I’m so scared!”, Matteron screamed and cried.
“ Shhhhh, it’s alright baby! You’re safe!”, Mrs. Drillbit cried as she gently held Matteron against her chest. Matteron then ran to hug her father and then she ran to Sheldon almost crashing into him.
“ Dr. Cooper!”, Matteron cried.
“ Shhhhhh, it’s alright. Calm down. I’m here.”, Sheldon softly said as he was gently rubbing her back. He then kissed her which almost immediately ceased her crying.
“ I was so scared. I thought I was going to go missing again.”, Matteron sniffled.
“ I know but shhhhh. Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur, happy kitty, sleepy kitty, pur pur pur.”, Sheldon softly sang even though she wasn’t sick as he injected a liquified Valium into her arm with a syringe and needle that he pulled out of his bag to try to calm her down.
“ What did you just give me?”, Matteron softly asked as Sheldon placed a bandaid on the injection site.
“ Just a shot of liquid Valium. This should help calm you down some.”, Sheldon said as he put the empty syringe back in his bag.
“ This isn’t going to make me sleepy is it?”, Matteron softly asked.
“ No it shouldn’t, just reduce your anxiety.”, Sheldon said.
“ I love you.”, Matteron softly said with a soft smile as she looked up at him.
“ I love you too.”, Sheldon said as he kissed her again.
‘ This girl is seriously the best thing that’s ever happened to me! Why can’t this certain Neanderthal just leave her alone?! I swear to God if Dr. Gunderson tries to intervene with our lives again by bringing in one more person to do his dirty work for him then I will go straight to the FBI headquarters and kill him! This guy is really getting on my last nerve and needs to just shut up!’, Sheldon thought as he continued kissing his girlfriend. The two of them stayed like that for a few minutes before it was decided that despite the crappy start to the weekend Matteron, Amy, Bernadette and Penny were going to continue staying in Las Vegas for their Girls trip. But before they knew it the next morning came and they drove home. But shortly after they got home Matteron suddenly got a text message from Sheldon. The message said:
S: Hello Matteron it’s Dr. Cooper. I know you just got home but I thought of a way to make up for your suckish weekend in Vegas. :)
Matteron looked at the message and with curiosity she texted back:
M: Hi Dr. Cooper. What would this weekend make up thing entail?
Sheldon answered back with:
S: Why don’t you come over to my apartment and find out. It shall be just the two of us because I’m going to kick Leonard out for the day. :)
A smile began to spread across Matteron’s face as she texted back:
M: Really?! I never realized you could be so romantic at times! Ok, I shall be right over! Let me just tell my parents first! :)
His response was:
S: Very well, I shall be expecting you shortly. I love you. :)
Matteron answered back:
M: I love you too. See you soon. :)
She then put her phone in her pocket, grabbed her ipod and headed down the stairs. She saw her parents standing in the kitchen talking with each other so she waited for a break in their conversation before she said, “ I don’t mean to interrupt but I just thought I’d say see you later. I’m going over to my boyfriend’s apartment to hang out with him for a bit.”
“ Oh ok sweetheart. Be careful and keep your phone on so your father and I can get a hold of you.”, Mrs. Drillbit said with a smile.
“ Yes and also please don’t get in trouble. Your mother and I don’t want to freak out again about what’s going on with you.”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ I get it Dad. Micah can I borrow your bike for a second?”, Matteron asked her brother who was sitting on the couch in the living room playing his Nintendo Switch.
“ Yeah sure Matteron but where are you going?”, Micah asked his older sister.
“ I’m just going over to my boyfriend’s apartment for a bit.”, Matteron said.
“ Oh ok. See you later.”, Micah said.
“ See ya. Bye Savannah.”, Matteron said as she waved at her younger sister who was sitting in the living room chair watching tv.
“ Later sis. Have fun at your boyfriend’s.”, Savannah said.
“ Thanks.”, Matteron said before she headed out the door to the garage, shut the door behind her, opened the garage door and got on her brother’s bike peddaling down the driveway and down the street.
Meanwhile at Apartment 4A…
“ Oh hey buddy, what’s up?”, Leonard asked when he looked up from the tv at Sheldon who just entered the living room. Leonard was playing Red Dead Redemption and was currently beating someone up in the game.
“ Not much Leonard except I’m kicking you out of the apartment for the day.”, Sheldon said as he walked right in front of him with his arms crossed narrowing his eyes at him.
“ What?! You’re kicking me out?!”, Leonard asked in confusion as he paused the game staring at his roommate/best friend trying to find out what this was all about.
“ Yes.”, Sheldon said.
“ Why?”, Leonard asked in a suspicious tone.
“ Because I’m having Matteron over and I want us to be alone. So I don’t care where you go whether it be over to Penny’s apartment or to work but I just want the apartment for the day.”, Sheldon said.
“ Hold up, this is sounding a little suspicious to me Sheldon Cooper. You never ask to be alone in the apartment with someone unless it’s something very private and personal.”, Leonard said as he narrowed his eyes at Sheldon.
“ Yes well what I do is none of your business. So could you please get out? I want to be alone with my girlfriend when she shows up.”, Sheldon said.
“ Alright alright I’ll get out. If you need me I’ll be over at Penny’s.”, Leonard said as he shut the game off, got up from the couch and headed out the door.
“ Thank you. See you later.”, Sheldon said.
“ Bye.”, Leonard said before he shut the door behind himself. He headed across the hall and knocked on Penny’s door.
Knock knock! “ Penny open up, it’s Leonard!”
“ Oh, hi Leonard. What are you doing over here?”, Penny asked in confusion when she opened her door.
“ Uh… can I come in for a while? Sheldon kicked me out.”, Leonard asked.
“ Well that’s… odd. Why would he do that?”, Penny asked.
“ He said that Matteron’s coming over and he wants to be alone with her.”, Leonard said.
“ Oh I know what this is about.”, Penny said with a look of suspicion on her face.
“ Well explain it to me because I don’t know what this is about even though I’m suspicious too.”, Leonard said.
“ Leonard isn’t it obvious? Why else would Sheldon ever say that he wants to be alone with a girl? It’s because he wants to engage in coitus with her.”, Penny said with a smile on her face.
“ Well now that you mention it that makes a lot of sense, that dawg! Should we eavesdrop on them?”, Leonard asked with a smirk on his face.
“ Not now you asthmatic dumb ass! You’re gonna get us caught! When Matteron shows up and they’re in the bedroom then we’ll do that!”, Penny quietly hissed.
“ Sounds good to me. Let’s spy through the peephole and watch for her.”, Leonard said with that same smirk on his face.
“ I love your dumb ideas sometimes Leonard Hofstadter.”, Penny said with a smirk as she and Leonard then each put an eye to the door peephole to watch for Matteron. They watched for a few minutes until they saw Matteron come into view knocking on the door to 4A. Sheldon answered the door moments later.
“ Ha there she is and there’s Sheldon too. Oh this should be really fun.”, Leonard said as he started snickering.
“ Would you shut the fuck up Leonard?! You’re gonna give us away and then Sheldon will give both of us strikes for this!”, Penny quietly hissed as she smacked Leonard upside the head.
“ Ow! That hurt Penny!”, Leonard quietly hissed as he rubbed the back of his head.
“ Oh please I didn’t hit you that hard!”, Penny quietly hissed.
“ Shut up shut up they’re going inside.”, Leonard whispered when he looked back through the peephole to see Sheldon and Matteron enter the apartment and shut the door behind them. Leonard and Penny then quietly entered the hallway and tip toed back over to 4A looking in through the peephole to see the two lovers heading down the hallway inside the apartment and disappear around the corner to where the bedrooms were.
“ Ok the coast is clear. Now open the door slowly and quietly.”, Penny whispered.
“ Alright.”, Leonard whispered as he quietly pushed open the door very slowly and the two of them crept inside quietly shutting the door behind them. The first thing they noticed was that Matteron’s ipod was playing from the speaker in Sheldon’s room Whatcha Think About That by The Pussycat Dolls feat. Missy Elliott.
“ What the hell?”, Leonard whispered.
“ They’re listening to a Pussycat Dolls song in there. We got to see what that whackadoodle’s up to.”, Penny whispered as they quietly snuck down the hallway and what they saw made Penny whisper with a smirk, “ Oh I f*cking knew it! They’re so going to do it with each other! Sheldon put a tie on his doorknob!” as she pointed at the tie wrapped around the doorknob. Leonard had done the same thing when he was doing it with Leslie. As they put their ears to the door they could hear the music more clearly as well as Sheldon and Matteron who sounded like they were leaning right against the door.
“ This is great. Just you and I alone together.”, Matteron said with a smile on her face as she was making out with Sheldon with her back against the door in Sheldon’s bedroom.
“ I know, it’s remarkable. I told you I would make up for your weekend.”, Sheldon said with a smile on his face while making out with her.
“ Yeah you weren’t kidding Dr. Cooper. I was so not expecting this.”, Matteron said.
“ Yeah well here’s something else you weren’t expecting either Matteron.”, Sheldon said as he pulled out a set of handcuffs, pulled her wrists forward and attached them to her wrists which made her squeal with delight.
“ Ooh capturing my wrists with handcuffs! I so f*cking love you Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper!”, Matteron exclaimed as she continued kissing him rubbing her hands all over his chest.
“ I love you too Matteron Reese Drillbit.”, Sheldon said as he continued kissing her rubbing his hands all over her back. The noises they were making made Penny gasp and shriek in the hallway behind the door, “ OH MY GOD!” before Leonard immediately slapped his hand over her mouth to silence her.
“ Penny shut up!”, Leonard quietly hissed but the second he did that was when Sheldon opened the door and interjected pointing his finger with Matteron standing next to him with the handcuffs still on her wrists, “ Aha, I knew it! I knew you two were going to try to spy on me! You two should be ashamed of yourselves!” The Pussycat Dolls song was still playing from Matteron’s ipod through Sheldon’s speaker.
“ Don’t look at me Dr. Crazy this was all his idea! I had nothing to do with this!”, Penny shot back as she pointed at Leonard.
“ Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, for shame! Why would you do that to me?!”, Sheldon scolded as he narrowed his eyes at his best friend.
“ I got curious to know what you and Matteron were doing with each other!”, Leonard shot back as he threw his hands out to his sides.
“ Well unfortunately your curiosity has just earned you a strike, same goes for you Penny! I told you that what I do is none of your business!”, Sheldon scolded.
“ Ok ok we get it, we’re going! We’re really sorry Sheldon.”, Leonard said as he rolled his eyes and him and Penny started heading back down the hallway.
“ What the hell did you two think we were doing?!”, Matteron shot back.
“ Engaging in coitus?”, Penny nervously said with a smirk on her face.
“ Why on Earth would you assume that?!”, Sheldon scolded.
“ Oh balls Sheldon Cooper it’s very obvious, you put a tie on your doorknob! I told you what that meant when you asked me what a tie on Leonard’s doorknob meant when he was doing it with Leslie!”, Penny hissed as she rolled her eyes at her theoretical physicist friend.
“ Yes well that is correct but in this case it was merely a diversion because I knew the two of you were going to try to spy on me! I had my suspicions of your curiosity the moment I kicked Leonard out! Your curiosity doesn’t fool the brilliance of Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper!”, Sheldon scolded as he joined his hands behind his back.
“ D*mn it you’re such an evil genius!”, Leonard hissed.
“ Well y’all did say I was one lab accident away from becoming a supervillain.”, Sheldon said.
“ Ok we’re done talking! Let’s go Leonard!”, Penny hissed as she stormed away with Leonard following her.
“ Yes please do and if you try to come back here again today y’all are going to receive strike 2!”, Sheldon scolded.
“ We get it Sheldon!”
SLAM!
“ Now anyway, where were we?”, Sheldon asked after he shut his bedroom door again. Matteron smirked again as the two continued making out with each other with the music still playing on the speaker. Their little make out session then turned into them ripping each other’s clothes off after Sheldon released Matteron’s wrists from the handcuffs and they began to do ‘it’ with each other on Sheldon’s bed, with a condom of course. Matteron shrieked with glee as her boyfriend was having his way with her.
“ Yes! YES! Keep doing that! This is magic!”, Matteron exclaimed as her hands were dancing all over Sheldon while she was kissing him.
“ You’re magic!”, Sheldon exclaimed as he was running his hands all over her and kissing her entire body.
“ Oh Dr. Cooper you’re the best lover I’ve ever had! You’re so cute!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ And you as well Matteron! You’re so godd*mn beautiful! You’re a vixen!”, Sheldon exclaimed.
“ I so love my new life!”, Matteron exclaimed. They continued making love to each other until they were suddenly interrupted again this time by the front door opening and Mrs. Cooper’s voice shouting, “ Sheldon Lee Cooper you get your butt out here right now young man! You are in so much trouble mister!”
“ Oh shit!”, Sheldon hissed under his breath as him and Matteron quickly got their clothes back on and Sheldon said, “ Wait here at the door for a second Matteron. I think my mother just showed up.”
“ Ok Dr. Cooper. Go see what she wants.”, Matteron said. Sheldon acknowledged that and walked out into the living room to see his mother standing there with an unhappy expression on her face.
“ Mom what an unexpected surprise! What are you doing here?”, Sheldon asked with a stupid smirk on his face.
“ Wipe that stupid smirk off your face or so help me Lord I will smack it off!”, Mrs. Cooper scolded with her arms crossed.
“ Ook… please explain to me what the problem is. You sound upset.”, Sheldon said as his smirk fell away.
“ I got a better idea, why don’t you explain something to me mister! What’s this that I’m hearing from my prayer group about you ending your engagement with Amy and dating a federal criminal named Turtle MayLee Gunderson?!”, Mrs. Cooper shouted in anger.
“ Oh, that, well I can assure you that what you heard is a complete misunderstanding. That is partially true but that’s not the case now.”, Sheldon nervously said.
“ Well Heavenly Father please explain or I’m going to thump you like a melon!”, Mrs. Cooper shouted.
“ Ok ok I’ll tell you! Remember when I was 10 years old and I told you about that news story about that missing 3 year old girl from Pasadena?”, Sheldon nervously asked.
“ Yes I remember that! Get to the point!”, Mrs. Cooper shouted.
“ Well it turns out that this girl who you’re claiming to be Turtle MayLee Gunderson as a federal criminal is actually that same missing girl. That’s not her real name. Let me show you who she really is because she’s actually here.”, Sheldon nervously said as he then stepped back a little bit to the end of the hallway and interjected, “ Come out here!” Matteron then came walking out into the living room and stood right next to him. Mrs. Cooper’s eyes then went wide.
“ Mom, this is Matteron Reese Drillbit. Matteron, this is my mother.”, Sheldon said as he introduced the two of them.
“ Hi, it’s nice to meet you Mrs. Cooper.”, Matteron said with a soft smile.
“ Oh sweetheart, I am so sorry. I didn’t know.”, Mrs. Cooper sympathetically said as she suddenly embraced Matteron.
“ It’s ok, I totally get it. You were just worried about your son.”, Matteron said.
“ Yes I was very much so worried but what’s the story? How did this happen?”, Mrs. Cooper asked.
“ Well… when I was 3 years old my parents and I pulled up into the parking lot of this local Sunoco gas station right here in Pasadena to get some gas. I was sitting in my car seat in the back playing with my baby rattle while my parents went inside the store for a few minutes so that my dad could use the bathroom and so my mom could pay for the gas but as they were doing that this mad scientist named Dr. Bryceton Farkle Gunderson suddenly pulled right up next to my parents car in this black unmarked van with dark tinted windows and he kidnapped me right out of the back seat of my parents car in broad daylight. Immediately following after that for the next 16 years of my life he forced me to commit a whole bunch of university robberies under the fake alias of Turtle MayLee Gunderson, his ‘daughter’. I only did these things because I was afraid of him and afraid of what he would do to me if I didn’t listen to him. And it wasn’t just the robberies he made me do, because of his manipulation he made me… stab your son with a knife and he also tried to make me take part in the explosion of Dr. Hofstadter’s car with a bomb knowing that if they got in it and drove away it would explode and kill them. I totally understand if you’re mad at me for this but I just want to say that I sincerely regret doing it.”, Matteron said with a sigh.
“ Well I’m certainly not happy about the fact that you stabbed my son but I’m not going to be mad at you. You seem like you’ve really learned from your actions.”, Mrs. Cooper said with a sigh.
“ I truly have. I was in federal prison for a month and I was originally supposed to be there for 3 whole years because of this but they reduced my sentence to 2 months after I spoke out a public apology and they ended up releasing me after a month for good behavior. I’ve totally reformed myself. It’s been that way since I’ve been out.”, Matteron said.
“ Ok well that at least makes me feel a little better. But I just have one question mister, how long have you been in love with this girl?”, Mrs. Cooper said to Matteron before she turned to Sheldon to ask her question to him narrowing her eyes at him.
“ I’ve been secretly in love with her for years Mom ever since I first saw her face on the tv. I couldn’t get her out of my head no matter what I did.”, Sheldon said.
“ Well Lord in Heaven this is a first for me. To know that my genius son has secretly fallen in love with a missing girl all these years is just shocking to me. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of that happening in my entire life.”, Mrs. Cooper said.
“ Well maybe it’s an unheard of syndrome, perhaps it’s called Missing Love Syndrome?”, Matteron said as she shrugged her shoulders.
“ Interesting. What do you think that means?”, Sheldon asked.
“ I mean it’s probably a syndrome where somebody develops a sudden love attraction for a certain missing person the moment they first see their image. It’s like love at first sight except it’s just their image in a picture or on a screen that you’re seeing rather than their real live face in front of you.”, Matteron said.
“ Perhaps you might be right, maybe it is an unknown syndrome. I never thought of that.”, Sheldon said.
“ Oh just shut up and come here!”, Matteron laughed as she pulled Sheldon towards her and kissed him.
“ Ain’t she great?”, Sheldon asked his mother with a stupid smirk on his face.
“ Oh Shelly sometimes I worry about you a lot but yes I do get your point.”, Mrs. Cooper said. The conversation continued until Mrs. Cooper left. Then later that evening shortly after Sheldon let Leonard come back home while Matteron was still there they invited the rest of their friends over and they all gathered in the living room of 4A just listening to music on Matteron’s ipod. The song playing was Glamorous(Sex Club Reject Dance Remix) by Fergie. The thumping music bounced off the walls as they sat around talking and laughing with each other just like any normal group of friends would except this group of friends consisted of a 19 year old girl who was an ex-federal convict and 8 adults who a majority of them were scientists while the other two were an aspiring actress and a comic book store owner.
“ This is sick! You guys are the best group of friends that I’ve ever had in my entire life! I seriously have never imagined myself having a big group of older adult friends before! You guys have literally saved my life and I can not thank you enough for this!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ No problem Drillbit! You’re a great friend to us too!”, Bernadette exclaimed.
“ Yeah, we never imagined having a majority teen friend before either, especially one that had been in federal prison for a month.”, Amy said with a smile.
“ Oh shut up Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler! That just totally made my night!”, Matteron exclaimed as she busted out laughing.
“ Made your night how Matteron?”, Sheldon asked in confusion as he stared at his girlfriend.
“ I mean that what she just said Dr. Cooper put me in a really good mood! In fact it makes me want to get up and do this!”, Matteron exclaimed as she suddenly stood up and started dancing to the music swinging her body all over the place like a tornado.
“ Hell yeah bitch, that’s what I’m talking about! You guys let’s get up and move the furniture out of the way!”, Penny exclaimed as she stood up with the others following suit.
“ Excuse me Penny but are you insane?! What are y’all trying to do?! Make a mess in here?!”, Sheldon scolded as he watched his friends start moving things out of the way.
“ Oh just shut it Dr. Whackadoodle and start moving furniture! Matteron’s already got the right idea, she started it! We’re having a dance party!”, Penny hissed at the theoretical physicist.
“ Oh good Lord!”, Sheldon interjected as he rolled his eyes and started to pitch in moving furniture around. They created a big open space in the middle of the living room and as Matteron kept dancing one by one the others joined in with her leaving Sheldon just standing there staring at his friends and his girlfriend as if they were nuts.
“ Oh son of a bitch, y’all are gonna make me make a fool out of myself.”, Sheldon hissed as he reluctantly joined in as well dancing like an idiot.
“ Yippie ki-yay rodeo clowns!”, Penny exclaimed as she was shaking her head, hips and arms all over the place as if she was in a nightclub dancing on the dancefloor.
“ That’s a good one Penny!”, Matteron laughed as she was dancing around like a madwoman.
“ Thanks Matteron!”, Penny laughed.
“ Nice music Matteron Reese Drillbit! Kind of sexy!”, Howard said in a low horny voice with a stupid smirk which immediately earned him a smack in the chest from his wife Bernadette.
“ Howie stop it! You’re a married man!”, Bernadette hissed at him in a high pitched squeaky voice.
“ Thanks for that Wolowitz!”, Matteron laughed.
“ Real smooth dude!”, Raj interjected at his best friend after he had just taken a placebo pill.
“ Oh just shut it Koothrappali!”, Howard shot back.
“ Hey both of you just shut it! We’re having fun here!”, Amy shot at them as she continued dancing around.
“ Yeah thank you Amy!”, Leonard butted in. Then he interjected, “ Matteron what version of Fergie’s Glamorous is this?!”
“ It’s a Sex Club Reject Dance Remix version Dr. Hofstadter! I found it on YouTube and downloaded it into an MP3!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ This is a great song, it’s fun!”, Leonard interjected.
“ I know, right?! I thought so too!”, Matteron interjected.
“ Hey wait a minute guys, I got something that might make this party even better!”, Stuart interjected causing his friends to stop and stare at him with the music still blasting from Matteron’s ipod.
“ Well dear Lord what is it Stuart?!”, Sheldon interjected as he rolled his eyes.
“ You’ll see in a minute Sheldon!”, Stuart said as he reached down behind the couch, picked up what looked to be some kind of futuristic disco ball on a rotating base, set it up on the coffee table, plugged it into the wall and shut off all the lights in the apartment before he switched the ball on making it spin, shooting bright blue laser lights all over the living room making them sound like Star Wars phasers as they bounced every which way.
“ Shut up! Is that a laser disco ball Stuart?!”, Matteron exclaimed as her eyes went wide as well as everyone else.
“ Yes it is Matteron, it’s a Death Star one from Star Wars! I brought it over here from my comic book store!”, Stuart interjected.
“ That is sick man! Woah!”, Matteron exclaimed with a gasp as she dodged her head from the incoming laser toward her face.
“ Oh yeah I forgot to tell you guys don’t let the lasers hit you in the face because it will blind you for at least 20 minutes each time it hits you!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Yeah no sh*t you idiot!”, Penny hissed as she dodged a laser coming at her face.
“ Oh what fresh hell is this?! Is this seriously what you’re reduced to doing to us Stuart?!”, Sheldon scolded as he narrowed his eyes at his friend.
“ No, would you chill out Sheldon?! We’re just a group of friends hanging out together doing something fun! And… wait a minute, I just thought of a great idea! Let’s make up a new game with this thing!”, Stuart interjected as a lightbulb went off in his head as him and his friends were dodging the laser lights.
“ What game are you talking about?!”, Matteron, Leonard, Sheldon, Raj, Howard, Penny, Bernadette and Amy asked together in confusion as they stared at Stuart.
“ Ok you guys have heard of Dance Dance Revolution, right?!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Yes! Get to the point Stuart!”, his friends interjected.
“ Ok well this is a new twist on it, I call it Dance Dance Laser Elimination!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Oh balls!”, Penny interjected as she rolled her eyes.
“ What does that involve?!”, Leonard interjected.
“ It’s real simple, we dance around the living room to the music and dodge the laser lights at the same time! Whoever gets hit in the eyes with a laser gets eliminated from the round and the last person still standing wins!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Oh ok!”, his friends interjected while nodding their heads.
“ Ok that sounds so fun! Let’s do it dude!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ Oh yeah I’m in! Amy?!”, Penny exclaimed.
“ Me too!”, Amy exclaimed.
“ Same here!”, Bernadette exclaimed.
“ I’m in!”, Howard exclaimed.
“ Oh yeah it is on bitches! Let’s do this!”, Raj interjected clenching his fist.
“ Leonard you playing?!”, Penny exclaimed.
“ What do you think Penny, yes!”, Leonard exclaimed.
“ I’m not so sure about this! This seems kind of dangerous! What if the lasers sever our retinas?! We’ll be permanently blind!”, Sheldon interjected as he crossed his arms.
“ Oh come on Shelbot, live a little would ya?! We’re all friends here! This game isn’t gonna kill us!”, Howard shot at him.
“ Aww oh alright, if y’all want to play this ridiculous game then I say let these ridiculous pending nuptials commence!”, Sheldon interjected as he threw his hands up and reluctantly gave in.
“ Oh hell yeah, let’s do this!”, Penny shrieked with glee as she smacked her hands together.
“ Wait wait let me restart the music!”, Matteron exclaimed as she ran to her ipod that was sitting on Sheldon’s desk and rewound the song to the beginning.
“ Ok 3, 2, 1, GO!”, Matteron exclaimed. Leonard whipped his phone out for a brief second making the pocket whip sound effect go off from the app on his phone causing Sheldon to exclaim, “ Oh grow up Leonard!” as they all started laughing while dancing around the living room to the music and dodging the laser lights at the same time.
“ This life rocks! Screw you Dr. Gunderson, you suck!”, Matteron exclaimed as she was having the time of her life hanging out with her friends and her boyfriend.
“ HELL YEAH DRILLBIT!”, her friends and boyfriend interjected.
“ Oh son of a Chewbacca bi*ch!”, Stuart interjected when he got hit in the eyes with a laser moments later and sat down.
“ Ha! Stuart got eliminated!”, Penny interjected but moments after she said that she too got eliminated making her shriek, “ Aww dang it!”
“ Sorry bestie, you’re out too!”, Amy laughed. Amy then did a backspin and got eliminated too making her shriek, “ Aww man!” Bernadette was the next one to go, then Howard, then Raj, then Sheldon leaving just Leonard and Matteron facing off against each other. As they were circling each other in the middle of the room showing off their moves their friends started snickering, but in a good way.
“ Well it’s just me and you Matteron!”, Leonard interjected.
“ Yeah it is Hofstadter!”, Matteron interjected.
“ Oh this is too rich, Leonard and Matteron!”, Penny snickered.
“ Bestie shut up!”, Amy laughed as she smacked her best friend in the shoulder.
“ Come on, whatcha gonna do?! What do you got?!”, Leonard interjected.
“ Oh I got a lot where that came from! You think you can take me down?!”, Matteron interjected.
“ Oh I know I can buddy because I ain’t losing to a 19 year old!”, Leonard interjected.
“ Well then bring it Hofstadter, it’s on!”, Matteron interjected.
“ Oh to hell it is Drillbit!”, Leonard interjected as the two of them were facing off fiercely in an epic dance laser elimination battle. They had a really good rally going until finally Matteron slipped up and got eliminated making Leonard shout out pointing his finger with a smirk on his face, “ Yes, I win! That’s my revenge for you and Penny trying to lock me out of your bedroom Matteron! I told you I’d get the two of you back for this! Ha ha!”
“ Nice game buddy, you won fair and square!”, Matteron laughed.
“ Ok new game you guys just as soon as our vision clears up!”, Stuart interjected.
“ You know as dumb as this game sounded to me at first, I must admit that was fun!”, Sheldon interjected.
“ Oh yeah it was Dr. Cooper! That was epic fire!”, Matteron interjected.
“ Did you guys enjoy that?!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Yes!”, his friends interjected.
“ Let’s go round 2! My vision’s cleared up!”, Matteron interjected as she smacked her hands together. They all cheered as they got back out in the middle of the room and the song restarted itself after Matteron put it on repeat. They started up again for round 2 and after the rest of them got eliminated one by one the second round came down to Sheldon vs Leonard which made the others start laughing their butts off because they knew that this was a rare sight to see even if they could see it just a little bit despite them getting shot in the eyes with lasers. Howard secretly decided to record video of it with his phone knowing that he probably wouldn’t see something like this happening again between his two friends.
“ Oh my god what a rare situation, Sheldon and Leonard dancing like idiots against each other! This is so funny!”, Penny laughed as she shook her head.
“ Yeah I agree! I never thought I’d see this before! Muy Kaliente Sheldon!”, Bernadette laughed.
“ Oh shut up Bernadette!”, Sheldon shot at her as he continued acting like an idiot around the living room as he was circling Leonard over the thumping music from his girlfriend Matteron’s ipod.
“ Why do you say that Sheldon?! Are you just chicken because you know you’re going to lose?!”, Leonard interjected with a smug smirk on his face.
“ No of course not Leonard! The only chicken I see here is you, both physically and intellectually!”, Sheldon shot at him as a form of trash talk.
“ Oh yeah I’m going to make you eat those words you whackadoodle!”, Leonard shot at him.
“ Yeah we’ll see about that! Prepare your battleship to receive its final hit Dr. Leonard Hofstadter! It’s going down!”, Sheldon interjected.
“ In your dreams Dr. Sheldon Cooper! That’s what you think! You are so losing!”, Leonard interjected.
“ I don’t think so best buddy, you are!”, Sheldon interjected. The dance off continued to fire up between the two physicists making their friends start laughing and cheering at the same time.
“ I so love this! Come on Dr. Cooper, kick Dr. Hofstadter’s butt! You so got this!”, Matteron laughed.
“ Yeah that’s what I’m talking about Dr. Whackadoodle! Show Leonard up!”, Penny laughed.
“ Sheldon! Sheldon! Sheldon! Sheldon!”, Amy and Bernadette started to chant and clap along to the beat of the music along with everyone else.
“ Thank you y’all!”, Sheldon interjected.
“ Come on Leonard you got this! Take that wacky bastard down!”, Howard interjected as he was still recording video with his phone.
“ Yeah you got this Hofstadter! Take the spear and run with it!”, Raj interjected.
“ Yeah what he said! Come on Leonard!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Thanks for the support you guys! You give up yet you wacky nut?!”, Leonard interjected.
“ No not even close my good man, I’m just getting started! Why?! Do you?!”, Sheldon interjected.
“ No I still have a ton of energy, enough to take you down with the power of The Jedi Force!”, Leonard interjected throwing out a Star Wars reference.
“ You can’t handle The Force Leonard! I shall use it on you to claim my victory!”, Sheldon shot back.
“ Not before I claim one first on you!”, Leonard shot back.
“ And so it begins, May the Force be with you!”, Sheldon interjected throwing out another Star Wars reference as the two of them really started firing up their dance moves making their friends really start cheering for both men until finally Leonard got hit in the face with a laser ending the round.
“ Oh crap! Ow!”, Leonard hissed as he took his glasses off and pressed his hands against his eyes.
“ Ha, I win! Score 1 for Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper!”, Sheldon interjected pointing his finger at Leonard.
“ Nice job buddy!”, Leonard interjected.
“ Thank you!”, Sheldon interjected.
Ring ring!
“ Oh crap my phone’s ringing! I got to find it!”, Matteron interjected as she started to stumble around the living room trying to find her cell phone and when she eventually found it she answered it and said, “ Hello?!”
“ Matteron it’s me, just checking in on you. Are you having fun sweetheart?”, Mrs. Drillbit answered.
“ Oh I’m having the best time of my life over here Mom! My friends, my boyfriend and I are playing a new dance game that we just made up in the living room right now! It’s called Dance Dance Laser Elimination! I can’t get enough of it!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ Well as long as you’re having fun that’s what counts. It’s better than you getting yourself into any more legal trouble.”, Mrs. Drillbit said.
“ Exactly! Look I got to go, we’re about to play another round! I’ll see you, Dad, Micah and Savannah later tonight!”, Matteron exclaimed.
“ Alright have fun, love you.”, Mrs. Drillbit said.
“ Love you too, bye!”, Matteron exclaimed before she hung up. Once their vision cleared again they started another round.
“ Ok this is seriously the best game ever! Great idea Stuart!”, Penny exclaimed.
“ Thanks Penny!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Yeah you said it! This is dope man!”, Matteron interjected as she started to howl like a wild wolf making her friends and her boyfriend join in with her while they continued dancing around to the music dodging the lasers. They continued their game for the next few rounds until around 9 p.m. when they all decided to call it a night. Leonard and Sheldon decided to drop Matteron off at home after Leonard stuffed Micah’s bike in his trunk. Once they pulled up in the Drillbits driveway Matteron pulled Micah’s bike out of the trunk, walked it back into the garage and came back out to say, “ That was seriously the best night I’ve ever had in life with all of you guys! We should totally do this again sometime!” when Leonard rolled his car window down.
“ We had a lot of fun too Matteron. We should do it again.”, Leonard said.
“ Yes I most certainly agree, although it was obnoxious at first.”, Sheldon said.
“ Well anyways I got to go, I’ll see you guys later.”, Matteron said as she then walked around to the other side of the car and tapped on the window to get Sheldon to roll it down so that she could kiss him good night.
“ Bye Dr. Cooper and Dr. Hofstadter, good night.”, Matteron said as she waved goodbye.
“ Good night Matteron.”, Sheldon and Leonard said as they waved back with smiles on their faces. They watched Matteron then walk back into the garage and duck into the house after she hit the garage door button to close it before they drove away back to their apartment.
“ You were so right about that girl Sheldon. She’s definitely not who we all originally thought she was when we first met her. She really is an innocent person.”, Leonard said with a smile as he was driving them home.
“ I told you so.”, Sheldon said as he nodded his head.
“ Man I can’t believe how stupid we were to think that this sweet girl belonged in federal prison for the rest of her life, just for something that Dr. Gunderson did to her and forced her to do for 16 whole years. It’s just sick.”, Leonard said as he shook his head.
“ Yes well we’ve all learned from our mistakes Leonard. The only thing I can say that I’m happy about is that my girlfriend got fair justice. She got her kidnapper behind bars where he belongs and she now gets to live the life that she should have lived with her real family who obviously very much love her.”, Sheldon said.
“ Well that’s the way the cookie crumbles I guess. Man I seriously hate that guy. I hope he never gets out of prison.”, Leonard said.
“ Me too Leonard, me too. But if he ever does, he’s dead. No one shall ever hurt my friends and my girlfriend if my life depends on it.”, Sheldon said.
“ Damn right Sheldon.”, Leonard said.
Drillbit home…
“ I’m home!”, Matteron exclaimed as she tossed herself on the couch in the living room.
“ Oh there you are Matteron. Did you have fun?”, Mr. Drillbit asked when he came walking down the stairs.
“ Oh I had a blast Dad! The best time of my life! We played several rounds of this brand new dance game that we made up called Dance Dance Laser Elimination! It was awesome!”, Matteron exclaimed as she sat up looking at her father.
“ Yeah your mother told me about that. That’s great.”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ Yeah I know and I’m so tired now that I can barely feel my legs.”, Matteron said.
“ Well then I think you should go to bed if you’re tired. Your brother and sister are already in bed asleep and your mother and I were just about to go to bed as well.”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ Yeah that’s probably a good idea Dad. Good night, I’ll see you guys in the morning.”, Matteron said as she hugged and kissed her father before she headed up to bed.
“ Good night sweetheart. See you in the morning.”, Mr. Drillbit said as he followed her and headed to bed as well. The next day Matteron tried to call her friends and boyfriend to hang out again but when they all said they had to work she began to get a little bored so she decided to go see what Micah was up to in his room that was right next to hers.
“ Hey Micah, whatcha up to?”, Matteron asked when she entered her younger brother’s bedroom.
“ Not much Matteron. What are you doing home?”, Micah asked when he looked up from his laptop at his older sister.
“ My friends and my boyfriend are working so I got nothing to do right now.”, Matteron said as she flopped down on her brother’s bed.
“ Oh I’m sorry about that sis. Do you want to listen to some music?”, Micah asked.
“ Sure. What do you got?”, Matteron asked.
“ Um let’s see I got Scorpion, Tech N9ne, Black Eyed Peas, Jeezy, Jay-Z, Iyaz, AC/DC…”, Micah said as he was naming off artists and bands that he had saved in his playlist on his laptop.
“ AC/DC sounds cool.”, Matteron said.
“ Ok I’ll put on some AC/DC then.”, Micah said as he picked a random song from an AC/DC album and pressed play before he stood up and opened his bedroom window and turned the volume up kind of loud but not enough as to make someone go deaf. The song was War Machine by AC/DC.
“ Micah Jethro Drillbit what the hell are you doing?!”, Matteron laughed as she watched her brother start rocking out to the rock ‘n’ roll music.
“ Oh come on Matteron Reese Drillbit you said you wanted to have fun! Well this is fun right?!”, Micah laughed as he stared at his sister.
“ Yes it is but dude you’re gonna get us in trouble with the Pasadena City cops! You can’t just blast your music out your bedroom window like a crazy person! You’re gonna get us thrown in jail!”, Matteron laughed but Micah just ignored her and started screeching out the lyrics to the song making Matteron roll her eyes and laugh, “ Oh screw it!” before she joined in with him. The two of them were jumping around the bedroom screeching the lyrics in each other’s faces having one of those heartfelt sibling bonding moments together which was a really great way for them to get to know each other better considering the fact that Matteron had been missing for 16 years and had been returned to the Drillbit family by Sheldon.
“ Better watch your back, cover your tracks!”, Matteron and Micah screeched but the moment they said, “ Kick your foot through the door!” was when Micah actually kicked his foot through his bedroom door making it fly open and slam against the wall in the hallway with a loud bang causing the two siblings to bust out laughing in amusement just as their parents and younger sister were running up there to see what was going on.
“ Matteron Reese and Micah Jethro Drillbit! What are you two doing up here?!”, Mr. Drillbit scolded his son and eldest daughter who were still laughing it up.
“ Oh hey Dad! What’s up?!”, Matteron laughed.
“ What’s up?! Why are you two screeching the lyrics to an AC/DC song and banging around up here like two banshees?!”, Mr. Drillbit scolded.
“ Don’t look at me! He’s the one that kicked his bedroom door!”, Matteron laughed as she pointed at Micah.
“ Micah do not kick your door! You’re going to break it! In fact, you probably already broke it!”, Mr. Drillbit scolded as he inspected the door baseplate and saw that it was completely splintered down the middle. He began to get fuming mad and looked like he was about to explode.
“ D*mn it Micah you…!”, Mr. Drillbit started to shout angrily but Mrs. Drillbit shouted, “ William calm down! You don’t need to fly off the handle at this!”
“ No Maren you don’t get it! Our son just kicked his bedroom door and busted the baseplate down the whole f*cking center of it! The latch is completely broken!”, Mr. Drillbit shouted in anger.
“ I know that but it’s just a door and a baseplate, we can replace those. We can’t replace our kids.”, Mrs. Drillbit said as she lowered her voice.
“ Maren can i please just have a moment?!”, Mr. Drillbit scolded as he then stormed down the stairs for a few leaving his wife and children up there to figure out what was going on.
“ Mom is Dad ok?”, Micah asked as he started to calm down.
“ I’m sure your father’s fine Micah. He’s just trying to blow off some steam right now.”, Mrs. Drillbit said.
“ He’s not going to hit me is he?”, Micah asked in concern.
“ No of course not, he’s your father and he loves you. He would never do that.”, Mrs. Drillbit said. After a few minutes of not knowing what was going on Mr. Drillbit then came back up stairs looking a little bit calmer.
“ Alright I thought about what you said Maren and you’re right, I shouldn’t get that angry about this. It’s just a door and baseplate, we can replace them.”, Mr. Drillbit said with a sigh.
“ Exactly honey, it’s not a big deal. There’s no need to get all hot under the collar at our son. Teenagers do dumb things once in a while and it’s just something that we have to live and deal with as parents.”, Mrs. Drillbit said as she shook her head.
“ You’re right. Micah I’m sorry I got mad at you, I was just frustrated.”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ It’s alright Dad, I get it. So what do I do about my bedroom door?”, Micah asked.
“ Well since you were the one that kicked it and broke it in the first place you’re going to use your monthly allowance to pay for replacing it.”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ Yes because you need to learn that you don’t do things like this. So get your shoes on because we’re going to Menards to get a new door and baseplate for your room. Matteron you come with us too.”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ Ok whatever you say Dad.”, Micah said as he turned his music off and shut the window before he put his shoes on and threw a snapback hat on his head before he grabbed his cell phone.
“ Sounds good to me. I got nothing else to do considering the fact that my friends and boyfriend are working today.”, Matteron said as she threw her shoes on and grabbed her cell phone as well.
Ring ring!
“ Hello?”, Savannah answered her phone when it rang.
“ Hey Savannah Drillbit I’m sitting in your driveway! You called me an hour ago and said that you wanted to hang out!”, Katie Rachaela Rattiffsitch, Savannah’s best friend answered on the other end.
“ Oh sorry Katie Rattiffsitch I lost track of time, hold on. I’m coming.”, Savannah said before she hung up.
“ Bye Mom, Dad, Micah and Matteron! I’m going to hang out with my best friend Katie!”, Savannah interjected as she ran down the stairs towards the front door.
“ Ok goodbye Savannah! Keep your phone on so we can get a hold of you!”, Mrs. Drillbit called out to her 16 year old daughter.
“ Ok Mom I will! Goodbye!”, Savannah interjected as she ran out the front door slamming it behind her. Savannah got into her best friend’s car and the two decided to go to the movie theater to see a movie.
“ Well now that that’s over, I’m heading to Menards with Micah and Matteron. Do you need anything Maren while I’m out?”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ No I think I’m good William. I think I’ll just stay here and do some house chores.”, Mrs. Drillbit said.
“ Ok honey I’ll see you when we get back, love you.”, Mr. Drillbit said.
“ Love you too. Bye.”, Mrs. Drillbit said as the married couple kissed each other before he left the house with Micah and Matteron while Mrs. Drillbit started cleaning the house. They came back half an hour later with a brand new door and baseplate for Micah’s bedroom. Micah and his father then replaced the broken door and baseplate with the brand new ones while Matteron went off to watch tv. Savannah came back home a couple hours later and went into her room to read a book. Then one month later 2 days after Mr. Drillbit left for a deployment to Afghanistan, Matteron was sitting on her bed watching tv again when all of a sudden her cell phone began to ring. She picked it up and looked at the caller ID. It was Bernadette.
“ Dr. Rostenkowski-Wolowitz?”, Matteron asked when she answered her phone.
“ Yeah hi Matteron it’s me. Could you please come with me to my lab and help me out with something very important?”, Bernadette asked.
“ Right now?”, Matteron asked in confusion.
“ Yeah I’ll come by your house and pick you up on the way. So can you?”, Bernadette asked.
“ Uh, sure I’ll come help you with something. Just let me tell my mom where I’m going. My dad’s in Afghanistan so he’s not home right now.”, Matteron said as she shut her tv off and got up off her bed.
“ No problem. Just let me know what she says and I’ll see you in a few minutes.”, Bernadette said.
“ Ok see you soon.”, Matteron said before she hung up and stuffed her phone into her pocket. She also grabbed her ipod too just in case if she needed it.
“ Hey Mom my friend Dr. Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz just called me and said that she’s coming by here to pick me up. She wants me to help her out with something very important at her lab today so is that ok?”, Matteron asked her mother when she walked down the stairs.
“ Yes that’s alright sweetheart but please try to be careful.”, Mrs. Drillbit said.
“ Ok I’ll try my best, thanks Mom. I’ll see you, Micah and Savannah later depending on how long this is going to take. I’m not sure what she’s having me do yet but I guess I’ll just have to find out for myself.”, Matteron said.
Ding!
B: Matteron come outside. I’m in the driveway.
“ Oh got to go, she’s here. Later Mom.”, Matteron said as she looked at the text on her phone that Bernadette sent her and walked out the door shutting it behind her.
“ Bye Matteron!”, Mrs. Drillbit called out. Matteron then got into Bernadette’s car and the two of them drove to Bernadette’s laboratory.
“ Ok we’re here.”, Bernadette said as she parked her car and the two of them walked into the building.
“ Nice. So what do you want me to do?”, Matteron asked as they entered the lab.
“ Um, well I got several glass beaker jars that contain some leftover toxic chemical that need to be properly disposed of. So if you could just dump them out in that biohazard bucket over there in that corner for me that would be greatly appreciated.”, Bernadette said as with a smile as she pointed at the beaker jars and biohazard bucket that were sitting near the sink in one corner of the lab.
“ That seems easy enough. Ok, I’ll do it.”, Matteron said as she nodded her head.
“ Great, thanks. I’m just going to get started on something else over here. Just let me know if you need anything.”, Bernadette said as she pointed at the another corner of the lab where one of the lab tables was.
“ Will do.”, Matteron said with a smile as she set to work dumping the beakers out into the bucket while Bernadette went to focus on something else. But halfway into her work the beaker that Matteron picked up suddenly slipped from her hand and shattered on the side of the bucket spilling half of the chemical on the floor, half of it into the bucket and a splash of it getting on the wound of her hand that was created by the glass cutting it.
“ Ow! Son of a fucking bitch!”, Matteron hissed in pain as she held her hand which immediately caught Bernadette’s attention as she raced over to see what had happened to her friend.
“ What is it Matteron?! What happened?!”, Bernadette asked in concern.
“ The beaker jar I had in my hand slipped out of it and broke on the side of the bucket! It cut my hand and everything!”, Matteron hissed in pain.
“ Yeah I can see that! Let me see it!”, Bernadette said in concern as she inspected Matteron’s hand. It was at this time that Matteron began to feel sick.
“ Oh crap, I don’t feel so good. Yeah I can feel it, it’s coming. Gangway!”, Matteron nasally interjected as she suddenly sprung up from the floor and started throwing up into the sink.
“ Oh my god I think you just developed some kind of toxic chemical shock and it’s starting to make you sick! Ok that’s it, hold on one second!”, Bernadette shrieked in concern as she started running Matteron’s injured under the faucet water while Matteron continued throwing up in the sink and once it stopped bleeding she then stitched it up and wrapped a bandage around it before she dressed Matteron in some patient scrubs that she found in the drawer. She then called Howard to tell him that she had to stay at her lab for a few days for the situation that she explained to him as well as explaining it to her boss who then gave her permission to stay so that she could take care of her injured and sick friend.
“ Ok Matteron here’s the deal, I’m going to be staying here for a few days to take care of you which means you’re now quarantined here until further notice.”, Bernadette said in a serious tone as she stared at her friend when she walked back into the lab.
“ Oh hell no, that ain’t happening! I’m out of here!”, Matteron nasally interjected as she then took off like a rocket out of the lab making Bernadette run out after her screaming, “ Hey Matteron Reese get back here! Where are you going?! You can’t just…!” She then called Howard back to which he answered with, “ What is it now Bernie?!”
“ Ok Howard Joel Wolowitz I need you to keep a look out for Matteron!”, Bernadette shrieked as she stormed back into her lab and started rummaging through things in the drawers.
“ Why?! I thought you said she got sick!”, Howard interjected.
“ She did but she just now escaped from my lab after I just told her that she was being quarantined here until further notice! She’s now running through the streets of Pasadena!”, Bernadette shrieked.
“ Oh Jewish hell are you kidding me?!”, Howard shrieked.
“ If I was would I be calling you like this you putz?!”, Bernadette hissed.
“ No! Ok ok don’t freak out! What is she wearing?!”, Howard shrieked.
“ She’s wearing a set of light green patient scrubs that I just put on her! You should be able to see that very easily along with her dark emerald green to black ombre hair flying around over her shoulders! It’s not that hard to find a 19 year old girl that looks like that!”, Bernadette shrieked.
“ Alright I’ll keep a look out for her! I’ll text Sheldon and Leonard and tell them to keep a look out for her as well too!”, Howard shrieked.
“ Good, you do that and if you guys find her please bring her back here because I don’t want her getting any worse! I don’t want her to develop any possible cardiac problems and having her end up in the ER!”, Bernadette shrieked before she hung up. Howard then sends a text to Sheldon and Leonard explaing the situation to them and telling them that they need to get over there as soon as possible. Within two minutes the physicists show up at Howard and Bernadette’s house.
“ Did you guys get my text?”, Howard hissed when he opened the front door to see his two friends standing there.
“ Yes we most certainly did Howard.”, Sheldon said.
“ So what’s the deal with Matteron? I couldn’t really understand what you meant in your text.”, Leonard asked.
“ Bernie called me freaking out that Matteron escaped from her lab! Apparently Matteron got sick from being exposed to some toxic chemical and Bernadette wants her to be quarantined there but she didn’t want to! She’s now just running through the streets of Pasadena wearing light green patient scrubs! Bernie’s worried that Matteron might develop some kind of cardiac problem so she told me that if we find her then she wants us to bring her back to the lab!”, Howard hissed.
“ Oh for God sakes!”, Leonard interjected as he smacked his hand against his face.
“ Oh Lord that doesn’t sound good at all. Come on Leonard and Howard let’s go look for my girlfriend and let’s also stop at Walmart on the way. I want to pick something up related to this situation that might be helpful.”, Sheldon said.
“ Ok sure. Whatever you want Sheldon.”, Leonard said as the three of them left the house and got into his car.
“ Excuse me! Sorry! Out of my way people!”, Matteron nasally screamed as she was running down the sidewalk through the city knocking into people as they were staring at her like she was nuts. The song You Don’t Know Me by Meghan Trainor was playing in the background. As she was running and screaming down the street Raj suddenly saw her run in the direction of Stuart’s comic book store as he was walking down the sidewalk the other way on the other side of the street.
‘ What the hell?!’, Raj thought in his head in confusion as he watched his friend running away screaming her head off on the other side of the street. But the moment she disappeared was when he saw Leonard’s car driving down the street towards him rolling the window down after they had just stopped at Walmart.
“ Hey are you guys out here looking for Matteron?”, Raj asked.
“ Yes we are! Why?! Did you see her Raj?!”, Leonard asked.
“ Yeah I just saw her running down this way towards the Comic Book Center! She looked like she was sick which would explain the green patient scrubs she was wearing and she had a bandage wrapped around her hand!”, Raj interjected as he pointed in the direction he saw Matteron run to.
“ Ok yeah that’s definitely her dude! Thanks for the info!”, Howard interjected from the back seat window when he rolled it down.
“ Leonard drive down this way please.”, Sheldon said as he pointed in the direction that Raj just pointed.
“ Ok Sheldon. Hang you guys.”, Leonard said but as he started to drive down the street Raj began to run along beside the car, trying to keep up with it like those Kiki videos on Tik Tok.
“ I’ll meet you guys there!”, Raj interjected as he was huffing and puffing.
“ No Raj just get in my car! Don’t run along beside it like an idiot!”, Leonard interjected out his car window.
“ Alright alright dude I’m getting in! Scoot over Howard!”, Raj interjected as he got into the back seat next to Howard after he scooted over.
“ Good Lord with all that running my girlfriend is doing right this moment I can most certainly say that she’ll probably need a nap once this is over!”, Sheldon interjected as Leonard was driving his car down the street towards Stuart’s comic book store.
“ She needs a nap regardless Sheldon. She’s sick.”, Leonard said.
“ Yes that’s most certainly true. Sleep is truly the best medicine for illnesses.”, Sheldon said as he nodded his head. Meanwhile Matteron then reached the door of Stuart’s comic book store and bolted inside nasally screaming at Stuart, “ Hi and bye!” as she then hid herself in Stuart’s tornado shelter in the floor.
“ Hey Matteron Reese Drillbit what are you doing down there?! That’s my tornado shelter!”, Stuart interjected at his friend as he tapped his foot on the floor board upholstered metal door in the center of the store after he came running out from behind the counter.
“ Yeah well now it’s my hiding shelter Stuart!”
“ Are you ok?! You don’t sound too good!”, Stuart interjected.
“ That’s because I’m sick! I got exposed to some toxic chemical through a cut on my hand at Dr. Rostenkowski-Wolowitz’s lab today and she’s trying to quarantine me there but I don’t want to stay there!”
“ Well you can’t stay in my tornado shelter either! This is where I go for tornado warnings!”, Stuart interjected.
“ Well it’s better than being quarantined at a science lab!”
*car door slam*
“ Hey what do you know, I see Sheldon, Leonard, Howard and Raj coming this way!”, Stuart interjected when he saw his friends pull up in Leonard’s car and get out. Sheldon slipped his messenger bag over his dark blue windbreaker onto his shoulder when he got out of the car before he started heading to the door of the store with the other three.
“ Oh crap! Do not tell them where I’m at Stuart because I don’t want to get caught!”
“ Well what do you want me to say Matteron?!”, Stuart interjected.
“ I don’t know! Come up with some kind of distraction! I don’t want them catching me because they’ll just bring me back to the lab!”
“ Alright whatever you say Drillbit!”, Stuart interjected before he immdeiately shut up after his friends walked in.
“ Hey you guys, whatcha doing here?”, Stuart nervously said with a stupid smirk on his face when nhe walked up to his friends.
“ Dude have you seen Matteron? I just saw her run this way.”, Raj asked as he narrowed his eyes.
“ Oh, Matteron? I don’t know what you’re talking about. I haven’t seen her.”, Stuart lied.
“ Oh for God sakes Stuart we know she’s here! Raj just saw her! Where is she?!”, Leonard demanded.
“ Yeah just give her up dude! My wife is looking for her! Do you want us to tear this whole store apart looking for her?!”, Howard demanded.
“ That won’t be necessary Howard. She’s not here!”, Stuart lied again.
“ You are most certainly lying to us, I can see it in your face! Now where is my girlfriend?! If you don’t give her up this instant you are going to receive a strike!”, Sheldon demanded.
“ Sheldon calm down! You guys are going to have to go somewhere else, I’m not lying! She’s not here!”, Stuart lied again letting out a slight nervous laugh.
“ ACHOO!”
“ Oh son of a Chewbacca bitch!”, Stuart hissed as he threw his head back.
“ Aha, liar liar pants on fire! I just heard someone sneeze! She’s most definitely here! Where did that noise come from?!”, Sheldon interjected as he pointed an accusing finger at Stuart and started walking around the floor with the other three following him.
“ Uh Sheldon I wouldn’t…!”, Stuart started to say.
“ Hush up Stuart, not now!”, Sheldon interjected as he continued walking along the floor until his foot hit the upholstered metal door floor board of the tornado shelter in the middle of the store.
“ I knew it! She’s got to be down here in your tornado shelter!”, Sheldon interjected as he pointed at the floor. He then tapped his foot on the shelter door and interjected, “ Hey Matteron Reese get up here now, you got nowhere to go you sickie! We got you surrounded!” as he stood there with Leonard, Howard and Raj surrounding it as well as if they were a part of law enforcement.
“ Bite me and leave me alone Dr. Cooper! I’m not going to be quarantined! No way no how!”
“ Well you don’t have a choice Matteron! You’re sick and that’s not good to run around like that! Do you want us to call your dad?!”, Leonard interjected.
“ My dad’s in Afghanistan on a deployment! He left like 2 days ago!”
“ Well regardless you need to get up here! My wife is freaking the hell out about you!”, Howard interjected.
“ I don’t care Wolowitz! I’m not coming out!”
“ Excuse me but we don’t appreciate that tone young lady! I think somebody here needs to go take a nap!”, Sheldon interjected.
“ No I don’t Dr. Cooper! I don’t want to take a nap!”
“ Yes you most certainly do Drillbit and you don’t have a choice! Now get up here before I rip this door open and drag you out!”, Sheldon interjected.
“ You wouldn’t dare!”
“ Alright that’s it, I’m coming to get you woman!”, Sheldon interjected as he ripped the door open to the tornado shelter in the floor and got down on his stomach, reaching down into the dark hole grabbing a hold of his girlfriend under her arms to pull her up.
“ Come here sickie.”, Sheldon said as he started pulling her up out of the tornado shelter.
“ Oh shit, ow ow! Dr. Cooper watch what you’re d…!”, Matteron nasally screamed but Sheldon interrupted her with, “ Shhhhhh, quiet. Let’s go.” as he put his finger against her lips when he stood up and cradled her against his chest like a baby. He then started carrying her out of the store towards Leonard’s car with Leonard, Howard, Raj and even Stuart following him. They then got in the car with Matteron sitting in Sheldon’s lap in the front seat next to Leonard with the other three men crammed in the back seat.
“ Alright you guys. Next stop, Bernadette’s lab.”, Leonard said as he started his car and pulled away from the curb.
“ I’d rather go home.”, Matteron nasally said in a somewhat soft voice.
“ Oh no you’re not going anywhere else Matteron, it’s nap time. In fact, here’s a nice soft blanket that I just got you.”, Sheldon said as he pulled the brand new blanket that he just got at Walmart out of his messenger bag and gently draped it over her, pressing her head against his chest which made her start crying.
“ Shhhhh, stop crying. We don’t need that. Just go to sleep.”, Sheldon said in a soft soothing voice as he kissed his girlfriend’s head.
“ Oh god, what do we do now?”, Leonard said as he rolled his eyes.
“ I know, let’s try Thor and Dr. Jones?”, Howard said as he looked at Raj and shrugged his shoulders.
“ Alright dude.”, Raj said as him and Howard started softly singing the words to Thor and Dr. Jones which was a song they wrote for their band Footprints On The Moon. By the end of the song Matteron had gone completely silent and was now sleeping soundly against Sheldon’s shoulder.
“ Hey look, it worked. She’s asleep.”, Howard quietly said with a smile as he looked at his sleeping friend.
“ We did good dude.”, Raj quietly said with a smile as he bumped knuckles with his best friend.
“ Yes, wonderful. Thank you for doing that.”, Sheldon quietly said.
“ No problem Sheldon.”, Howard quietly said. Leonard then reached one hand over to gently rub Matteron’s back as he kept the other one on the steering wheel. Once they got to Bernadette’s lab they walked in with Matteron sleeping in Sheldon’s arms.
“ Bernadette we found your runaway sickie here. She was trying to hide in Stuart’s tornado shelter at the Comic Book Center. We just got her down for a nap in the car a few minutes ago on the way here.”, Sheldon quietly said.
“ Oh good. Just set her down in the bed over there against the wall.”, Bernadette quietly said as she pointed at the hospital-like bed that she had set up in the lab shortly after the guys started looking for Matteron. Once Sheldon situated Matteron in the bed and covered her with the brand new blanket that he covered her with in the car after Bernadette inserted an IV into Matteron’s arm to give her fluids Bernadette then took Matteron’s temperature with a thermometer and it came out to be 101.3 degrees which was a slight fever.
“ Ok she definitely has a slight fever which is not good. Leonard could you put this ice pack on her head please?”, Bernadette quietly said as she looked at the thermometer for quick sick second before she put it away and grabbed an ice pack which she handed to Leonard.
“ Sure Bernadette.”, Leonard quietly said as he took it from her and gently set it on top of Matteron’s head. Matteron slightly moaned in her sleep the second that the cold compress touched her head. Sheldon then kissed her forehead as he joined his hands behind his back.
“ So how did you guys get Matteron to go to sleep so fast?”, Bernadette quietly asked.
“ Oh it was easy Bernie. Raj and I just started singing Thor and Dr. Jones in Leonard’s car and she instantly shut up. She fell asleep right at the end of the song.”, Howard quietly said with a smirk on his face.
“ That’s because she probably liked it you idiots. It’s a great combination of catchiness and stupidity.”, Leonard quietly said as he rolled his eyes.
“ Yeah I didn’t think about that dude. That’s a nice touch.”, Raj quietly said with a stupid smirk.
“ Must you Raj?! My girlfriend is sleeping!”, Sheldon quietly hissed at his friend.
“ Sorry Sheldon.”, Raj quietly said.
To be continued…
- 5
- 6
- 7
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Missing Persons case file Matteron Reese Drillbit