The Importance of Family

Disclaimer: I don't own Bonanza, not making any money, just cheap thrills.

Warnings: Angst

Rating: FRT

The Importance of Family
Chapter 7


"Dad?" Adam called from the doorway. His feet seemed to be frozen, holding him where he was. For Adam, a lifetime passed in the seconds it took for Ben to look up. Flashing before his eyes were scenes that began with the first time he'd seen Joe and ending with the last time he'd spoken to him. Yelled at him is more accurate, he reminded himself. He would have collapsed at that moment if it weren't for Hoss' sudden grip on his elbow, holding him upright. If Joe were...gone, the last conversation between the brothers would have been their most recent argument. The thought of that was like a knife in his gut.

Seeing the looks on the faces of his older sons, Ben shook himself from his misery. "He's in surgery," he quickly told them, bringing slightly more relaxed looks to their faces.

The ice melted and Adam stepped forward, bringing Hoss with him. Taking seats on either side of their father, each laid a hand on the older man's back, almost as if the move had been rehearsed.

"If Joe ain't gone, why were ya upset?" Hoss asked, somehow managing to be both blunt and gentle in the same sentence.

Ben sucked in a deep breath. "The doctor said there's swelling around his spine. Hopefully it's temporary, but for the moment Joe is paralyzed from the waist down." He had always hated giving bad news, but one thing he'd learned over the years was, that like pulling a splinter, it was best to do it quick.

“What did you find out?” Ben asked, changing the subject.

Adam frowned, “Are you sure Joe said somebody was there?” He was secretly hoping that Ben had misunderstood.

“Of course I'm sure,” Ben replied. “Do you think I'd imagine something like that?” he bristled.

“No,” Adam acknowledged. “The problem is, we didn't find anything up there to indicate another person had been in the area.”

“Maybe his tracks were covered during the rescue,” Ben suggested.

“We thought of that,” Hoss put in. “That's why we looked further away from the scene of the accident. There's nothing Dad, not a single track that says somebody else was up there with Joe.”

Ben frowned, “What are you trying to say boys?”

Adam sighed, “We're saying that either this man, whoever he is, is good enough that he left no trace. Which you have to admit isn't likely, or the only other man with Joe was conjured by his imagination.”

Nobody seemed to know what to say after that, and the time, form that point on, passed slowly. The three men spent their time alternating between pacing and sitting dejectedly in their seats, lost in thought. An observer might have concluded that each man was alone in his misery, he would be wrong. Though the room was silent, the remaining members of the Cartwright family gained strength and comfort from the presence of the others as they waited for news of their youngest.


Dr. Simms entered the waiting room after five hours of surgery. He was exhausted, all he wanted was a shower and sleep, not necessarily in that order. That would have to wait, however, the family still needed to be spoken to. He had barely stepped into the room when the three men converged on him, demanding answers. Holding up his hand, he waited for them to quiet. "Mr. Cartwright, I'm Dr. Simms," he introduced, "I operated on your son Joe. The first thing you should know is, Joe came through the surgery with flying colors," he smiled.

Ben sighed, his relief almost a palpable thing, "How bad was it doctor?"

Simms had expected that question, after all five hours was a long time to be in surgery. "It actually wasn't as bad as we had initially feared. The problem was that Joe had numerous small bleeds and it took time to track them all down. I'm confident, however, that we found them all and barring any unforeseen complications Joe should make a full recovery from his internal injuries." He only wished he could give them equally good news about the paralysis.

"Thank God," Ben whispered, exchanging a relieved smile with his sons. "What about his spine?"

"I'm sorry Mr. Cartwright, I can't tell you any more than Dr. Moore has," Simms replied with sincere regret. “We simply won't know much about his spine until the swelling goes down.”

Ben nodded, "When can we see Joe?"

"He'll be in recovery for at least an hour and then he'll be moved to his room." The doctor consulted the chart he carried, "He'll be in room 216, you're welcome to wait there or if you like the cafeteria is still open."

"Thank you doctor," Ben acknowledged. As the other man turned to leave, Ben thought of one more question, the one he knew Joe would want an answer to. "How long do you think Joe will be in the hospital?"

Dr. Simms frowned, the question seemed a bit odd to him, so soon after surgery. "That's difficult to say Mr. Cartwright, but I'm sure he'll be here at least a couple of weeks."

"I see, Joe won't be happy to hear that," he absently added.

Simms smiled, understanding the reason for the question now. "He doesn't like hospitals I take it?"

Ben shook his head, "The first memory he has of a hospital is the night his mother was taken away to one and never returned. He's hated hospitals ever since. That's never changed, even once he was old enough to understand that it wasn't the hospital itself that took his mother away," he explained.

"I see, we'll doing everything we can to send Joe home as soon as possible. I'm afraid that's all I can promise." Dr. Simms was sincere in his words. He knew that if the patient had a strong aversion to being confined in a hospital it could impact his recovery, sometimes positively, but it could also have a negative impact. Therefore it would be best to get Joe to the point that he could be safely sent home.

Ben nodded, "I understand and so will Joe," he assured the other man. “Thank you,” he added, receiving an understanding smile in return.


*****************

Almost exactly an hour later, the three older members of the Cartwright family stepped into Joe's room.

“He looks so small,” Hoss whispered.

Ben smiled, “Something about a hospital bed does that to a man. You even look small in one,” he informed his son, shooting him a sidelong glance.

Adam, busy taking in the equipment Joe was hooked up to, didn't seem to notice the way his brother looked. His father's words had him chancing a look at the young man in the bed. He frowned. How could the boy be so pale and yet be alive? He quickly glanced at the monitors, reassuring himself that Joe was indeed breathing, his heart beating a steady rhythm.

Adam had always enjoyed the finer, more cultured things in life. He had attended many a symphony performance, thrilled to the skilled interpretation of many a classical piece of music. None compared to the concert of his brother's heart beating out a staccato rhythm in harmony with the steady breaths which filled his lungs with air, assuring that the boy, become man, still lived.

Joe blinked his eyes open, a gasp alerting the others that he was awake. He wondered idly why his head was so fuzzy, making it hard to think and focus.

“Joe, son, how do you feel?” Ben asked, bending over him, his dark eyes filled with concern.

“Sleepy,” Joe mumbled. “ 'at happened?”

Ben smiled gently, “You had an accident with your motorcycle, do you remember?” His smile grew indulgent at the slight head shaking. “Well that's alright, you just focus on getting better. We can talk about the details later.”

“'Kay,” Joe mumbled, closing his eyes. He was asleep in seconds.

Ben looked up, his face stern. “I don't want either of you mentioning the man your brother talked about unless he brings it up. If it was his imagination it might upset him to learn he was seeing things and if it wasn't,” he trailed off. There wasn't any need to point out that knowing somebody had watched him lying injured and in pain, only to torment him rather than offer help, would be upsetting in its own way.

“He won't hear about it from us,” Adam assured the older man, speaking for both brothers.

“Why do ya suppose Joe would imagine something like that?” Hoss asked, finally giving voice to the question that had been on his mind for hours. He wasn't as educated as Adam, but he wasn't stupid either. He knew that if that man was a figment of Joe's imagination, as it was looking like was the case, there had to be some reason his little brother would create such an illusion. It made his heart hurt to think that Joe was so unsure of their love. He knew they sometimes argued, but he never thought it was bad enough to make baby brother question his place in the family.

Ben looked startled, immediately realizing the implications of Hoss' question. “I don't know Hoss, I didn't think I'd been that hard on him.”

Adam shook his head, of course his father would accept all of the blame, if there was blame to be laid. “You haven't Dad, or no harder than you've been on me or Hoss. For that matter, if you've been too hard on him then I've been even worse. I think we all know that,” Adam solemnly added. The regret he'd been feeling earlier, for the harsh words spoken to Joe, grew exponentially with the implication of Hoss' words.

Hoss frowned, “Ain't nothing gonna be fixed if we start worrying about who did what,” he admonished them both.

Ben nodded, Hoss was right of course. “What would you suggest son?”

Hoss' face grew perplexed, “I don't really know Dad. I guess we need to try to figure out if Joe really thinks we don't love him and if he does, convince him he's wrong.”

Ben smiled, leave it to his middle son to cut to the heart of the matter. “You're right Hoss, that's exactly what we have to do,” he said before Adam had a chance to denigrate the simple suggestion. Turning again to Joe, he gently brushed the hair from his face. “Just as soon as he's able to stay awake for more than thirty seconds at a time, we'll make sure he knows how much he's loved.”

TBC