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Lapidary	By : Savaialian Category: 1 through F > Doctor Who Views: 1563 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the Doctor Who fandom, nor to I make money from writing about it. I use their creations with due respect.

Chapter List
- 1-Lapidary
- 2-TWO
- 3-THREE
- 4-FOUR
- 5-FIVE
- 6-SIX
- 7-SEVEN
- 8-EIGHT
- 9-NINE
- 10-TEN
- 11-ELEVEN
- 12-TWELVE
- 13-THIRTEEN
- 14-FOURTEEN
- 15-FIFTEEN
- 16-SIXTEEN
- 17-SEVENTEEN
- 18-EIGHTEEN
- 19-NINETEEN
- 20-TWENTY
- 21-TWENTY-ONE
- 22-TWENTY-TWO
- 23-TWENTY-THREE
- 24-TWENTY-FOUR
- 25-EPILOGUE
- 6
- 7
- 8
Zaeus and Alair stared at us on the opposite seat within the cart, quiet. The Master stared back until both of them began to smile a little. The old man gave a small chuckle and leaned back. “You must be an alien,” he announced.
“I am,” the Master confirmed. “So is my lead advisor. Meet the Doctor.”
“Pleased,” I said, reaching out to shake the man’s hand. Thankfully, hand shaking seemed done here. I’d committed a few offences among people with touching taboos.
“He’s not normally so quiet,” the Master went on. “Once he warms up to the fact I’m not out to commit genocide, he’ll talk your ear off,” he promised.
“Look, I don’t think you mean to arbitrarily kill anyone,” I argued. “It’s evident you’ve made a commitment here with the Seldatians.”
“But, you still think I might be using this new occupation as a means to trap you somehow,” he argued right back.
“It would be your way,” I pointed out.
“It would, but it isn’t,” the Master said. “We won’t get a thing done if you keep hanging onto these ideas, Doctor.” He brushed some non-existent lint from his shoulder with a casual but contemptuous sweep of his hand. “I don’t know what else I could do but walk around in leg irons.”
“Grand,” the little girl said to her grandfather in a stage whisper, “are they married?”
Zaeus clapped his hand over the girl’s mouth quickly. “Hush,” he commanded.
“We’re not married,” I protested. “What makes it seem like we are?”
Zaeus took his hand away once he saw I addressed his little girl. She straightened and flipped her hair off her shoulders. “Married people talk to each other like that,” she said. “Mom and Dad did, but I think they only fought so they could make up later,” she added in a confidential tone. “Sometimes they’d spend hours in the bedroom, apologizing.”
The Master burst out laughing, and clutched his stomach. “I’d have to be certifiable to marry this critical do-gooder,” he said between trying to get his breath and a fresh wave of humor.
I scowled and stared out the window. As if he was a catch! And, he was certifiable.
“Aw, don’t hurt his feelings,” Alair pleaded with the Master. “Don’t you think he’s pretty enough? I do.” She smiled at me, and despite the conversation, I smiled back. She was a precocious thing. “He’s even got pretty shoes,” she went on, and Zaeus gave a little groan.
“Forgive her, my lord and lord adjudicator,” Zaeus asked. “She is but seven turns and her mouth moves as it will.”
“But, he is pretty,” Alair stressed again. “I like his big, dark eyes.”
“That’s enough,” Zaeus said firmly. “Sit and recite your prayers until your mind is louder than your lips.”
The Master turned toward me and smiled a big, evil smile. “I like his big, dark eyes, too, Alair,” he said. In my mind, I heard the rest of his thought. Maybe I should cut them out and keep them.
You stay out of my head, I warned. And, you shouldn’t be able to get in my head in the first place, not without physical contact.
He didn’t reply at all, just leaned back and got comfortable. We were nearly to his palace now.
In the main hall, the Master called a servant forward and ordered two adjoining rooms prepared for Zaeus and Alair. He requested a large lunch sent to them, then his tailor. At every command the old man trembled and shook a little more. The Master was giving him back his status, and as such, his pride.
“Zaeus, I want you to return to your original duties,” the Master said. “Your granddaughter may occupy herself with you when she isn’t receiving an education.” He paused and looked at the old man afresh. “What happened to her parents?” He asked.
“Drowned last year in a fishing accident,” Zaeus answered, his face dark with the memory. “Nine people died that day. Storms can be sudden and violent here, sire.”
“And unexpected,” the Master added. “I’ve yet to see anything but gentle rain.”
“There are ways to chart the weather,” Zaeus said. “But, all of the city’s special equipment for such was destroyed in an uprising five years ago. The old emperor thought they were a waste of time.”
The Master gave his new employee a cagy look. “You have the pieces, don’t you?”
“I do,” the man admitted.
“Send for them,” the Master ordered. “I’ll repair them.”
“My lord, I fear they may not be fixable.”
“Then, the Doctor can fix them,” the Master said. “I’ve never known anyone more capable of saving a planet with a shoestring and a paper clip.”
I smirked at him. “I didn’t build an entire rocket with food scraps,” I reminded.
To my surprise, the Master ducked his head a little, as if a bit embarrassed by my recognition. He clapped Zaeus on the shoulder lightly. “If I’m not mistaken, Cook has a small child the same general age as your granddaughter,” he informed. “Perhaps Alair could use a friend in her new home.”
“Yes, my lord,” Zaeus said, bowing.
“Come on, Doctor,” the Master said, walking for the rear of the palace. “We have planning to do for an aqueduct.”
I skipped up alongside him, trying to look at his face. If he really was embarrassed because I’d said something nice about him, I wouldn’t know what to think. “Are you upset I mentioned the rocket?” I asked. “Because it’s nothing to be shy about; you did brilliant work with it.”
“You said so at the time,” he replied, still keeping his head slightly down.
“And, with a human mind,” I added, “it made your efforts all the more incredible. I didn’t even understand the technology.”
“You would if given the opportunity,” he deflected. “I had an entire lifespan as a human, so understanding what you grow up with isn’t special.” He led me into a room full of paper and drafting equipment and shut the door behind us.
I faced off against him, blocking his movement toward the drafting tables with my body. “Why won’t you ever accept praise for what you can do?” I asked. “You can shout it yourself until time stops, but the moment someone else takes notice of your brilliance, you run from it.”
The Master eyed me with startling focus. “It might just be that no one else has ever been smart enough to understand how smart I am, except for you,” he answered. “And, I’m much more accustomed to hearing condemnation from your lips than praise.”
“But you’re a genius,” I argued, and again I saw him turn his head. “If I talk about your intelligence it should only sound like commenting on the weather!”
“But, it doesn’t,” the Master replied, his voice suddenly quite aggressive. He rounded on me, and I took a step back automatically. “You’ve had your head up your arse for centuries, Doctor. It’s only recently that you took a moment to think about me in any capacity other than as a simple villain. It never occurred to you that I had more dimensions!”
I started to get angry myself, because it was just like him to assume he knew all about me, about what occupied my mind and what I thought of him. “Well, maybe you should have done more than wreck havoc,” I pointed out. “Constantly pitting yourself against me with worlds at stake isn’t the way to show me your other facets!”
“Oh, so I could have gained your notice with an invitation?” He asked, still advancing on me, backing me up toward a wall. “You’d have stopped your pell-mell tear through time and space to have a chat?” He poked me in the chest with a finger, and it hurt. “You were too busy showing off to your little human companions to think about me, Doctor. And, stupid as they were, you only had one that ever questioned you about us.”
My back hit the wall then, as I massaged the poking spot between my pectorals. “I tried to reason with you over and over,” I protested. “I would have been willing to listen to you!”
“Oh, indeed?” The Master looked at me with such disdain that I questioned my own words, which rarely happened. “I got such a good reception from you when trying to help you get out of Borusa’s clutches on Gallifrey. You stole the seal of the High Council and left me to fend off the lightning bolts that threatened to fry me. Then, you left me for Cybermen!”
“You try to kill me all the time!” I shot back, now seething. “You don’t kick a dog repeatedly and expect it to welcome you home with a wagging tail!”
The Master drew back and stared at me so hard I thought I might burst into flames. “You know what? Start the plans for the aqueduct yourself. If I’m around you right now I might do something you’ll regret!” He stomped out, narrowly missing an eavesdropper, little Miss Alair. She dodged him and took her thumb out of her mouth, looking at me with wide eyes.
“Don’t worry,” I told her, though I didn’t feel all that confident the Master would cool down anytime soon. I didn’t feel as if I would, actually.
Miss Alair gave me a look that made me feel even more stupid than I already did. “Why didn’t you just let him kiss you?” She asked, all innocence. “That’s what Mommy did.”
“He doesn’t want to kiss me,’ I replied, my hearts doing a terrified shudder at the very notion. “He wants to strangle me.”
Alair shook her head, making her curly black hair swing. “No, he doesn’t want to hurt you,” she insisted. “He’s just sad you don’t appre… appre…”
“Appreciate?” I asked with a feeling like falling.
“That’s it, appreciate,” she said quickly. “He’s just sad you don’t appreciate him.” She tilted her head to one side as she looked at me. “Why don’t you?”
“It’s hard to appreciate a case of the flu,” I answered darkly.
**
Miss Alair’s words followed me around all afternoon. I drew up the aqueduct plans regardless, using maps of the city for reference. It was a mess, frankly, and I didn’t want to build a perfect system for buildings that might be torn down anyway. Deciding I’d get nowhere without consulting the Master’s appointed renovation people, I took a stroll down the hall in search of them. Eventually I came up a room full of tables, books and people.
When I entered, a lot of bowing happened, which I hated. “Hello,” I said. “No, quit bowing. You can bow for the emperor, but not me. I’m here to discuss the city renovation.”
“Excellent,” a wizened old man said. He gestured me to the largest table, which was covered in well drawn maps. “We’ve decided gravity feeding is the best way to get water to the lower city, and which buildings to demolish, but we’re having trouble with this.” He pointed with a gnarled finger to a very large, outlined structure. “It’s the Temple of Holy Elements.”
“Which cannot be moved by law,” I finished for him. This was their religious center, and if anyone tampered with its arrangement, a riot would doubtless follow. Maybe even a revolt of the whole populace, rich or poor. “Then, why not divert the pipes around it?” I asked.
“The temple is built upon solid rock, as deemed by our faith,” the man informed. “It will be frowned upon to take the construction even close to the grounds.”
“How close is close?” I asked.
“Three furlongs in every direction,” he answered. “And, many of our people built at the base of the temple grounds to be closer to the faith. There isn’t any good way to get a water supply to them.”
I nodded. “I assume they use wells.”
“They do, and that would be fine if the water wasn’t full of what our new emperor calls ‘bacteria’.”
I sighed. “Ultraviolet light will kill bacteria, but you have no electrical power sources for that.” I’d have to rig up long-standing batteries for individual homes, then, or use solar power. That wouldn’t be too bad, actually. Solar energy should be fine to power ultraviolet lights. “Give me a few days to arrange something,” I said. “Meantime, plan to take the pipeline well away from the temple and the people below it.” This was work, trying to get something accomplished in an agrarian, non-technologically advanced society.
“My Lord Adjudicator?” The man said as I prepared to leave. “May I speak with you a moment in private?”
“Certainly. What’s your name?” I let him draw me aside as I asked.
“Sigglis, my lord,” he said. He looked around to see that no one was close enough to listen, then leaned in. “My lord, it’s obvious you and our emperor share a covenant,” he began, eyeing the Master’s TARDIS key around my neck. “But, you should wear the earring and eye paint of an accepted emperor-in-standing.”
I blinked at him. “Earring and eye paint?”
Sigglis bit his lip and nodded swiftly. “It lowers his standing if you don’t advertize your kept status. Anyone may approach you for favors, which is an insult to him.”
I began to see a glimmer of his meaning. “I have to show I belong to him in order to keep other people from approaching me,” I said.
“Yes, my lord.” Sigglis exhaled, obviously relieved he didn’t have to go into more detail. “You can get nearly any woman in the palace to show you what to do. I beg you to consider compliance; a new emperor is constantly tested, as the interruption in the festival dance yesterday should have made plain.”
“I suppose it doesn’t help that I’m not interested in satisfying the sexual needs of usurpers,” I replied. “I have to put myself on display even though I’m not particularly tempting.”
Sigglis drew back a little, his face showing surprise. “My lord, you are everything that the populace wants. I understand that you and my emperor are not of this world, so perhaps you didn’t know that. My apologies for allowing you to walk about in ignorance.”
I had a long look around the room, trying to see any obvious differences between myself and these people. They all stood shorter than I, firstly. They all had coal black hair. They were thickly made, though not overweight. Their eyes were green or blue or grey. In short, I was their complete opposite, and I hadn’t even noticed. Even the Master stood taller than these people. Miss Alair’s attention to my big, dark eyes seemed very plain, now.
“Thank you, Sigglis,” I said. “I’ll make sure to not disgrace the emperor any longer.”
With that I left the planning room for the kitchen, intending to speak to the only woman I knew so far, the cook. It chaffed me to have to be seen as belonging to the Master, but I’d promised I wouldn’t deliberately screw up his work here. So, this was me seeking someone to put some paint on my face and shove an earring through my ear. I’d be exactly what the Master teasingly referred to as ‘arm candy’ if it would help matters along. The prospect of getting something done at this point appeared bleak.
**
“Hold still, my lord,” Hann said as she applied a thick layer of eyeliner to me. “Look up and you won’t mind seeing the brush coming at your face.”
I did as she said and touched my silver hoop earring. It still stung a little, but then she’d rammed an ice pick through my lobe, so what could I expect? “This could get infected,” I complained.
“No, it won’t,” she said. “I’ll give you ointment to put on the hole. Don’t take out the earring for several months and you should be fine.” She finished stroking the black liquid under one eye and moved to the next.
I felt the weight of the paint and gave an inward sigh. “Is all this so necessary?”
“If you want to not bring shame as a royal consort, yes,” she answered, smiling a little. “And, what’s wrong with looking good for him? He’s beautiful; surely you want to do him justice.”
I thought about that. On the unbiased perspective, the Master’s current body wasn’t any lovelier than the others he’d had. He always looked handsome. Still, this last incarnation captured a lot of his frenetic power and passion. He bristled with vitality and energy. He had nice eyes. He had a splendid, long neck, too. On our world his neck would draw attention the same way as Double-D breasts on Earth. “He’s good,” I admitted.
Hann laughed a little as she blackened in the rest of my lower eye. “I like his voice,” she confessed quietly. “Don’t tell me that hearing it in a bed isn’t splendid.” She stepped back for a look at me and shook her head. “My lord, your eyes just pop with power like this. The emperor is sure to take notice.” She pulled a small mirror from her pocket and gave it over. “Just look at yourself.”
I obliged her and had a look even though I hardly ever thought to examine myself in a glass. Oh. Well. My eyes were kind of incredible when outlined in black. It didn’t even look girly. In fact, I looked sort of dangerous. I didn’t know how to feel about that, because I knew I was dangerous when properly pushed to it. The earring wasn’t very obtrusive, either. It glinted in the lamplight, but wasn’t large enough to look stupid. I handed back the mirror. “Thanks,” I said. “I think I can put the paint on, now.”
“Here.” Hann gave me two small jars. “One is ointment for your ear and the other is the traditional kohl. If you need more of that, come back to me.”
“Okay.” I got up and left, not really knowing where my head was and greatly desiring to have it back.
Once out in the main hall, I checked the time even though I always knew the time everywhere. Almost time for the evening meal… I wondered where the Master might have gone, and if he’d even allow me to eat with him now that we’d had a row.
“My Lord Adjudicator, please wait!” A feminine voice beseeched me from far back. I turned and waited for the person to catch up.
She was pretty. She had very, very long black hair and a closely fitting dress in the same color. Panting, she stopped beside me and bent over to catch her breath. “You are so hard to pin down, my lord,” she wheezed, trying to straighten. “I need to get your measurements.”
I stood and waited, obliging her. “Okay,” I said.
The Master’s tailor swiftly measured me nearly in every way that I could think of, calling out the numbers as if to cement them in her mind, for she didn’t write anything down. When finished, she beamed up at me and winked. “My lord is of enviable dimensions,” she said. “It’s little wonder my emperor chose as he did.”
“I’m skinny,” I protested.
“You’re ideal,” she countered. Her slate eyes moved up and down my body with frank assessment. “Muscled, lean, tall and strong with a lovely face and beautiful eyes.”
“Okay,” I said, having nothing else to really add. “Are you finished?”
“Done,” she announced, giving me an odd little salute. “When you wake up there will be clothes waiting for you in your emperor’s closet.” She did an about-turn and marched off, and the set of her shoulders suggested self satisfaction.
I didn’t catch sight of the Master anywhere, so after a long search I went back to his bedroom. A group of women cleaned it, changing the sheets and doing a general tidying. One of them looked up at me and gasped, prompting her sisters to do the same, and in seconds I had the entire crew gathered around me and chattering.
“My Lord Adjudicator, you look wonderful!”
“Oh, your dark eyes!”
“The emperor will be so pleased!”
“Will he really?” I asked one. “I take it there’s nothing else I should do?”
“Well…” The one I’d addressed glanced at her companions before leaning in to speak at a whisper they could all easily hear. “Have you done the mud bath and hair removal?” She asked.
“Mud bath and hair removal,” I sighed. “No, I haven’t.”
“We could help you,” she offered, and I heard such hope in her voice that I almost wanted to do the silly things just to please her. But, I also really didn’t want shaved and bathed in mud.
She must have seen my reluctance, for a smile moved her lips, as well as the lips of all the women assembled. “It’s traditional,” she encouraged. “We could help you, sire.”
“All right,” I relented. The Master would pay for putting me in this position. “What should I do?”
“Come with us!” All but one woman took hold of me, and they shuttled me out and down the hall toward a large door.
And so, I came to understand that I wouldn’t be shaved. In moments I stood starkers in the middle of a brightly lit room while women applied wax and cloth to me, ripping my nice body hair out in patches at a time. It hurt. It hurt like the devil. I stood perfectly still anyway, on the promise that if I did, they wouldn’t go anywhere near my pubic hair. To my embarrassment and discomfort, they were very thorough. When they finished and I was stinging all over, they dumped me into a bath of what seemed to be bentonite clay, and left me.
“I’m hairless and cooking in hot mud,” I complained to the universe, but the universe didn’t listen.
One standard hour later, the women came back and hosed me off with water just a bit too warm. I supposed my lack of protesting was what encouraged them to slather my body in slick oil. I only felt glad I had hair left on my head and privates, and didn’t complain. One of them gave me a pedicure and another gave me a manicure while yet another woman wrapped me in a strangely configured white toga-thing. I’d never felt so stripped of skin in my life, and was grateful to be covered. Someone retouched my eyeliner, and I supposed the temperature of the mud bath had made it run. God, all I needed was weepy mascara lines on my face and I’d really feel like a girl.
Eventually, the scrub squad left me to my own devices. My stomach rumbling, I trudged down the hall back to the Master’s room. He was in there already, and didn’t look up as I came inside. Feeling rather depressed and not knowing why, I stretched out on his bed and turned my face to the evening sun. That, at least, felt good.
“Holy arse-fucking Rassilon,” I heard the Master exclaim. “What the hell happened to you?”
I turned my head, and he gave a little jolt at seeing the eyeliner. “You’d better like it,” I said. “It was all done to me in the thought that you would. Maybe I’m arm candy now?”
The Master walked over to me, his eyes wide in taking in my ruin. He squinted in the light and did another little startle. “You haven’t got any hair left on your chest,” he exclaimed.
“Or my arms, legs, back, stomach, buttocks and neck,” I listed. “I’m stinging all over. They bathed me in clay. I haven’t got a speck of dirt anywhere, not under my toenails, fingernails or navel.” I pointed to my ears and frowned. “Someone stuck a scoop in my ear canals and got rid of all the wax.” I paused. “They scraped my scalp, too. I wouldn’t show up as a living organism under a scope.”
The Master clapped a hand over his mouth, but it was too late. I’d seen his smile.
“It isn’t funny,” I said sourly. “I did this for you, you know. It’s traditional for your consort to be exactly as you see me.”
The Master took his hand away from his mouth. “Seriously?” He reached out and touched my shoulder with a single finger, running it down my bicep. “You’re as smooth as glass.”
“I ought to be. They practically sanded me down.” I sat up. “Have you ordered dinner yet? I’m hungry.”
“On its way,” he confirmed. “Since when are you my consort?”
“That’s apparently what everyone thinks,” I answered. “I might be your justiciar, but it’s been taken a step further.”
“I told you not to sleep in my bed,” he reminded. “What else would people think, Doctor?”
“Your bed is the size of a small continent. We don’t even get close,” I griped. “Go all over the universe and you encounter that gutter mentality.”
“It’s not gutter mentality, it’s logical,” the Master argued. “People of wealth share a bed for only a few reasons. No one we encounter is going to assume you sleep with me because you don’t trust me, that you’re lying in here on the chance at catching me doing something nefarious.” He paused to look at my eyeliner again, as if he couldn’t help doing so. “Just because you’ve vowed eternal chastity doesn’t mean everyone else does, or that they should,” he added. “God, you look strange sitting there with all your skin shining and not a single hair anywhere but your head.” He seemed to bite off a smile, then. “Did they remove the hair at your neth-.”
“No, I wouldn’t let them,” I said, feeling extra cranky at this point. “It feels as strange as it looks,” I promised. “I had more hair than this as a blond with a receding hairline.”
Chuckling, the Master sat, and by the look of it, just to stare at me. “Don’t pout with those lips,” he warned, smiling. “After all that’s been done to make me like you more, I’d think it would put you off.”
I quickly straightened my face. “Oh, don’t kid about that,” I protested.
“Who’s kidding?” He asked, not a muscle moving on his face and his eyes as serious as I’d ever seen them.
My hearts beat out of rhythm for three whole seconds. I couldn’t move or speak. Frozen, I sat there looking at him in wild-eyed fear.
The Master burst into laughter, and I broke out of my trance to throw a pillow at him. He dodged it, still laughing. “The look on your face,” he wheezed. “I couldn’t have inspired more terror with a nuclear device aimed at Earth.”
- 6
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Lapidary