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Survival Isn't An Option	By : Pilgrim Category: S through Z > The Walking Dead Views: 6774 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead or any of the characters from the series. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 7
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- 9
Isabelle curled her fingers until her nails dug into the tender skin of her palms and she pressed them hard until she felt her skin split. The familiar sick twist of enjoyment thrilled up and down her spine and her breath returned to normal as the world settled around her once more in eerie focus. The years of injuries had rendered her almost immune to pain, twisting the sensation into an adrenaline rush of pleasure. She caught Beth looking at her, pushing a bottle of water towards her once more, and she uncurled her fingers and smiled.
“Thank you,” Isabelle whispered.
“You’re welcome, are you ok?” Beth enquired gently as she reached for her hand. Isabelle shrank away from the touch, not wanting the girl to discover the fresh wounds she’d inflicted. Rapidly she rubbed her hands over her jeans, smearing the traces of blood away.
“Yes, thank you. I feel much better already,” Isabelle slowly stood up. “I’m just going to get some fresh air. Still feeling a bit, erm, shaken.”
Time had passed more quickly than she had thought as she stepped outside once more, the cooler air of evening brushing over her skin. The sun was just above the treeline, casting a soft warm glow over the courtyard. A pile of corpses was now heaped carelessly in the courtyard; more being added to it every second. A man in a prison jumpsuit stood with his arms folded at the gateway. Slowly she made her way towards him, “Hi, can I help?” Isabelle smiled warmly assuming he was in some form of overseer role.
“Oh hey, no, we’re all done now,” the man mumbled.
“Oh, right. Hey, I’m Isabelle,” she held a hand out and smiled again as he slowly turned to look at her.
“Axel,” he shook her hand gently and turned back to the mess before them.
“Nice to meet you, Axel,” Isabelle muttered as she followed his gaze towards the perimeter fence. Walkers were still piling against it, drawn by the siren they’d kept wandering closer.
“You new around here?” The man glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.
“Yeah, Daryl found me in the woods a week or so ago,” Isabelle informed him, shuffling uncomfortably.
“Oh, the dancing girl. Yeah, I heard mention of you,” Axel grinned more warmly.
“Guess word travels fast around here?” Isabelle muttered with a smaller grin, she was used to being the topic of conversation.
“Yeah, not many of us left. We were surprised you could stay with them. Guess a dancer is less dangerous than an ex-convict anyway,” Axel murmured so only they could hear as he stepped closer.
“We?” Isabelle whispered back. “What do you mean allowed to stay with them?”
“My friend, Oscar, and I, we were prisoners here when all this happened. When Rick’s group came, they killed the rest of our group but let us live. Said we could stay in the prison too but we must be in a separate block. I don’t think we’re even supposed to be in the courtyard with you lot either but, hey rules were made to be broken,” Axel chuckled, scuffing his toe in the dirt as Isabelle shifted her weight uncomfortably.
“You were prisoners here?” She forced her face to stay neutral. Prisoners? He allowed prisoners to stay but had debated her qualifications for remaining? What had she said in her sleep to make her less trustworthy than a criminal?
“Yeah, nothing major,” Axel folded his arms defensively, obviously picking up on her attitude.
“Oh, no, of course not. Well, I look forward to seeing you around Axel. I hope you can come and join us more,” Isabelle smiled sweetly and turned to walk away before realising what else he had said. “Wait, Rick killed your group?”
“Picked up on that did you after you were done judging?” Axel raised a hand dismissively as she struggled with words for an apology. “To be fair they did try to kill him and they threatened him. Oscar and I were the only ones who didn’t, it earned us some leeway. Don’t worry neither of us mean any of you any harm. To be honest we just want to be safe too, guess it’s just human nature.”
“Axel, I’m sorry,” Isabelle muttered in embarrassment.
“It’s fine, I know it doesn’t sound good, saying you’re an ex-prisoner, don’t worry,” Axel patted her shoulder gently. “We’re good guys, we just did stupid things and got caught for it. Have a nice evening ma’am.”
          Isabelle winced as he nodded at her politely and made his way back into the prison block that belonged to him and Oscar. This world may be survival of the fittest, but she wasn’t going to win any friends or allies from being a judgemental idiot. Nothing had changed from her old world, not really. It was all still a competition, just as deadly. You presented the sweetest disposition possible so that no one suspected you’d tear them a new one when they turned their backs. The only difference was, this time her life really was on the line and not just her career. The sun was setting, the air getting cooler but she didn’t want to go back in yet.
          She didn’t know what she wanted any more. All this time her life had been so well laid out, all the plans clearly defined and set. Now, did she stay or did she run? If she stayed what would she do in this group that already functioned so neatly. She looked at the three freshly dug graves, absently wondering what each of their roles had been. The thought was too morbid even for her. Anyway, their roles had hardly done them any good. They were six feet under now. She turned to sit on the picnic table, perching on the edge, her feet on the bench part to give her a higher viewpoint. Her eyes stayed trained on the entrance at the opposite end of the compound.
As the dark depths of night dropped heavily, preventing her from seeing even the outer fence, Isabelle turned and looked back at the prison. Her new home and somewhere she truly felt an outcast despite various people’s best efforts to make her feel welcome. All her life had been about beauty and pain and now it was just pain, the beauty ripped clean from the earth and raped by the apocalypse. She had no skills other than a meagre knowledge of nutrition and physical exercises to perfect and hone the body. Her hands had never rested on a gun, never mind her fingers pull a trigger and claim a life. Sure she could wield a knife as well as the next person but there wasn’t any strength in her arms to push it through a skull. She didn’t even know if she could tolerate such an action and its consequences mentally, she had brought life to dead texts and scripts. Now the role would have to be reversed and she would have to take life or whatever form of life the walkers now possessed. Death was present with every breath, she had to accept that, death would be her trade, her new dance teacher, mentor and partner. She could almost feel his bony hands on her shoulders, waiting to pull her under.
Shouts went up from the tower, she couldn’t determine the words exactly but it filled her with hope that perhaps Maggie and Daryl were returning. Her eyes turned back to the gateway and scanned the further distance. Sure enough, there was a flickering light approaching quickly and the faint hum of an engine. Glenn and Axel jogged past her and she didn’t hesitate to follow. She needed to know he had returned. Arriving at the gate, seconds after the two men, she ignored her rapid breathing and desperately scanned through the trees.
“Here, draw the walkers away when they get closer,” Glenn handed her a hollow pipe and gestured for her to strike the fence to the right as Axel did the same to the left.
          Jogging part of the way down the fence she watched and waited. As soon as the lights of the motorcycle came into view once more she smacked the metal repeatedly into the fence and shouted at the walkers to draw them away. Sure enough they followed, rancid teeth snapping and twisted fingers grasping through the chain link. One reached through and skinned its own arm on the metal. Isabelle retched despite herself as the flesh sloughed off cleanly from the bone and fell in a slick pile at her feet. She tried to concentrate on not throwing up while her mind tortured her with a constant mental rerun. The gate rattled open finally, a gun fired and it rattled shut as the motorcycle rumbled through and up to the prison. Isabelle dropped the metal pipe by the gate, leaving it ready for whomever performed the next run on the walkers. Her breathing was too quick and her heart was pounding into her palm, as a chilled sweat slicked her brow and ran down her spine. She was going to pass out.
“Hey, are you ok?” Axel rested a hand on her shoulder, Isabelle nodded. Silently she reached for his hand as her breath shuddered painfully.
“Just… yeah,” Isabelle wheezed, fighting against the threatening darkness.
“Come on, slow, deep breaths, you’re alright,” Axel soothed, running a hand over her spine gently. Isabelle wretched emptily and pressed her hands into her thighs as she bent over, struggling to regain control of her own body. “Nice and easy now,” Axel continued calmly.
          Isabelle let herself become lost in the gentle words as he continued to mutter absently anything that could be soothing. Slowly her breath steadied, the others were already inside the prison and the baby’s cries had stopped echoing by the time she could take in external senses once more. Axel patiently offered her an arm as she straightened and for a moment she wondered what he was doing before realising he was offering it for support. She smiled gratefully before linking her arm through and leaning slightly on him as they silently made their way back up to the prison. If it hadn’t been for the walkers and the mud she could have almost lost herself in the memory of walking back to her apartment from a night at an elite party in New York, Paris or London. Although instead of tattered and abused jeans and jumpers she would have been dressed in some designer she’d never heard of. She would have also been more than a little drunk and instead of Axel maintaining his gentlemanly arm position it would have descended to all out groping by now. The apocalypse may be here but apparently; the men were improving in their behaviours.
Axel walked her all the way to the concrete steps before making his farewells and heading to his own cell block. Isabelle sank wearily onto the steps outside, the day taking its toll on the little energy she had left. He hadn’t even tried to kiss her cheek, the sheer novelty of the scenario made her smile wistfully. She rested her head against the cool handrail relishing the chill against her sweaty brow. Her heart was still beating in the disturbed rhythm that accompanied malnutrition and stress.
“You coming in ladyship?” Daryl stood behind her, arms folded as he watched her. She scowled half-heartedly at the name and turned to look at him.
“Don’t call me that. If there’s anything I’m not now, it’s that,” Isabelle whispered, not really feeling all that jovial as another wave of nausea washed over her. “Why did you bring me here?” She whispered, sighing heavily to still her stomachs churning, his eyes met hers sombrely as he dropped onto the step next to her. “Why didn’t you just kill me?”
“Don’t you think there’s been enough death? Besides, what’s some prissy ballerina capable of…?” Daryl smirked, leaning back casually as he watched her. Isabelle looked away quickly at his words, she gritted her teeth to stop the frustration from breaking through in the form of tears. “Is that what’s bothering you? That you’re useless?”
“Yes that’s bothering me Daryl. What was your first clue? So far, I’ve been dragged off my horse, fallen off my horse, broken my wrist, slept for almost a week and hidden in a car. Right now, all I’m useful for is keeping my dinner down and to be honest, the outlook isn’t looking so great at the minute. I’m just a mouth to feed, like Rick said,” she snapped, letting her eyes meet his again as her jaw set in anger, taking away the nausea. “I know I’m not capable of anything, I know I don’t deserve to be alive, yet here I am. Alive, eating, drinking and completely useless.”
- 7
- 8
- 9
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Survival Isn't An Option