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Stranded	By : Ceefax Category: S through Z > Torchwood Views: 4865 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Stranded
- 1
***

Stranded

by Ceefax

***

Ianto was almost asleep on his feet by the time he got home.

"Hey," Jack said, watching as he shut the thick airlock door behind him. "I was getting worried."

"There was a fairly massive cock-up. Everyone had to stay behind while they checked the logs. Nothing to do with me, though." He shivered as the warmth hit him. His numb extremities began to tingle with returning circulation.

"Ah. You eaten?"

"No." He sat down on the edge of their bed and took off his boots.

"Come to the club. We'll eat out."

"We don't have the money to eat out, and I'm exhausted. I'm just going to have a sandwich and go to bed."

Jack sat down next to him. "I get employee discount, and you can sleep in tomorrow."

"Yes, but right now I'm about three blinks away from unconsciousness. Give it up, Jack." He began the lengthy process of removing his clothes. Mid thirty eighth century fashions tended towards complicated and constrictive.

Once he'd unfastened the heavy leather tunic, Jack slipped his hands inside and rubbed his neck and shoulders. "Go and have a shower. I'll make you something."

Ianto sighed and leaned into his touch. "You'll be late for work."

Jack, taking up the disrobing process where Ianto had left off, unlaced his shirt. "No, I won't. Just let me take care of you."

That had been a dominant theme ever since they had found themselves marooned here. Jack as protector. Ianto found it simultaneously comforting and patronising. For someone well over a thousand years out of time, he wasn't doing too badly. He'd picked up enough of the thirty eighth century version of English to get by (Jack, of course, spoke it like a native), and his Draconian wasn't too bad, either. He'd got his job without Jack's help. It wasn't the best job in world, mostly just data entry, but he was still very proud of what he'd accomplished.

Jack had successfully stripped him to the waist and, cupping his face gently between his hands, pulled him in for a kiss. He really did have wonderful timing. After spending over twelve hours strapped into the ridiculous bondage gear that, in 3758, was conservative business attire, the relief of finally peeling it off was particularly sensual. He pulled away with regret. "You really will be late."

"Come with me."

"No. Need to sleep."

"Oh yeah?" He rubbed his palm against Ianto's crotch.

Ianto gave a short huff of laughter and rested his forehead against Jack's. "Fine. Need to wank, then sleep."

"Now that's just a waste." Another soft, slow kiss. "I'll make you some rempt, it'll be fine. Come with me."

There was no coffee on Kairon. The local caffeinated beverage was sickly-sweet, and Ianto didn't get along with it at all, although there were times when he had to admit it was necessary. "Fine. Just for a couple of hours. But I really need to eat first."

"You really do. You're getting cranky." Before Ianto could protest, he was hauled to his feet and shunted in the direction of the bathroom with a slap to the rear. "Shower, go on."

The plumbing was still not quite right, but much better than it used to be. When Jack had first bought the little two-person interstellar craft, it provided only one water temperature - scalding hot. It had taken Jack weeks of tinkering to make it usable.

He washed quickly, let the shower's hot air facility blow him dry, and wandered naked back into the bed/living room, yawning hugely.

"Now, there's a gorgeous view," Jack said with a grin. "How come I can't ever persuade you to go out and show that off?"

Ianto gave him a disapproving glare and took the offered mug of hot rempt. "Because it's winter, and because I've been socially conditioned not to." He curled up in a corner of the bed and sipped at his drink. "Besides, I don't see you wandering the streets naked."

"Well, no. It's cold out there. Wait till summer."

"At which time I will pretend not to know you."

"Suit yourself," Jack said, rifling through the wardrobe.

Ianto took another gulp of rempt. Although it tasted like liquid tooth decay, it kicked in quick. "Not to nag," he began, watching Jack sort through clothes, "but what happened to my food?"

"We'll eat when we get there." He tossed a couple of shirts behind him onto the bed.

"Jack! I haven't eaten all day, I may not make it to the club."

"That's why you shouldn't skip breakfast. Here, put this on."

"That's why you should let me out of bed in time to have breakfast." He hooked Jack's selected outfit with his foot and pulled it towards him. Black, tight enough to meet fashion's demands, but not enough to be uncomfortable.

"Don't remember you complaining. And wasn't it your idea?"

"I don't think it was, actually." He drained the mug.

"Yeah, whatever. C'mon, quicker you get dressed, quicker we can eat."

He pulled on the clothes, adding a few extra layers for warmth. Kaironian winters were cold. Jack, dressed in white, didn't seem so bothered. "You could try leaving something to the imagination," Ianto suggested, watching his lover fix his hair.

He wiggled his arse in reply. "Hey, I put a lot of hard work into this, damned if I'm not showing it off."

They wrapped themselves in coats and left the ship. The interior of the surface dry-dock was bitterly cold, and Ianto was sorely tempted to turn straight back. They walked along the length of the ship, much bigger on the outside thanks to the engine housing and the double hull, past the name and registration code painted on the nose (Tranquillity's Pride, NPZ55818-IIFG-969), and into the outside, where the biting wind hit them.

***

Inclement weather aside, once they left the spaceport and entered the town itself, Friday night was in full swing. Crowds of people of various species spilt out over the pavements and onto the roads. The odd 'craft or tram still on the streets picked their way slowly through the revellers. A large, oddly-shaped person trod on Ianto's foot, and apologised in a slurred voice. Ianto hurried to catch up with Jack, and took his hand to stop them getting separated.

The cold and the rempt were doing their work, and he was feeling more awake. The town seemed somehow less alien at night, although the neon signs were in no alphabet ever devised on earth, and humans were few and far between. Not humans - the current politically correct term translated as 'Earth mammals'.

The club where Jack sang six nights a week was called 'the seven purple insects' which was apparently a double-entendre in Draconian. He had a beautiful voice, but Ianto didn't think much of thirty-eighth century music, which seemed to be mostly about changing tempo in unexpected places.

They bypassed the crowd/queue at the front of the building, in his case ignoring and in Jack's case encouraging their catcalls.

That was the aspect of this future he found most disturbing - even more than the toilets that talked, the cars that flew, or the heavily tentacled co-workers - somehow over the centuries, humans (earth mammals, sorry) had become the sluts of the galaxy. Simply by virtue of his species, in this society he was the equivalent of a girl in a singles bar wearing a short skirt and a low-cut top who'd had rather too much to drink. This was, at best, annoying, but did explain a lot about Jack.

They went in the staff entrance. Jack kept a hand on the small of his back, guiding him through the backstage areas, exchanging greetings with the exuberantly dressed people dashing by. The warmth was wonderful, and Ianto began unfastening his coat.

Gentlemanly, Jack slipped it from his shoulders. "I'll take these - you go find a table."

The restaurant portion of the club was raised from the main stage and the dance floor. The small circular tables were lit from beneath, their surfaces glowing pale blue. This harmonised rather pleasantly with the dim green lights in the ceiling, which glistened on the many waving tentacles of the giant-elongated-sea-urchin-like person at a table across the room.

Both he and his nearly human shaped companion were very familiar to Ianto. He worked with them, and as the only three on their floor whose grip of the Draconian language (the official language of the planet, and therefore also of the office) was less than perfect, they'd ended up friends by default. Ianto was closest to Nir, he of the many tentacles. The tall, pale woman with the crest of spines along the top of her head was Chukran, and he was still a little unsure of himself around her, as, rather than facial expression or vocal tones, her species used movements of their crests to communicate their emotional state. Ianto was only sure of 'angry' - pointing straight up, and 'frightened' - flat against the head. Until he felt more confident in interpreting the shades of meaning in between, he remained a little guarded around her.

If they were anything like as exhausted as he was, they should be home in bed. And they were both watching the other stairway, where one might enter the restaurant if one had come into the club through the front doors.

He slid quietly into the seat next to Nir. "Let me guess. Jack told you to wait for me and shout 'surprise', right?" he said, using twenty-first century English for 'surprise'.

Nir's whole body flashed between dark red of startlement and purple of embarrassment. The colours flowed across him in pulsing bands, like a cuttlefish. "Yes, actually," he replied. "But he wouldn't tell us what it meant."

"Should we say it anyway?" Chukran asked, crest at half-mast, which, if you put a gun to Ianto's head, he would have tentatively identified as somewhere in the 'amused' spectrum.

"You can if you like. But I think the moment's passed."

"What does it mean?" Nir asked, several eye-tentacles at a quizzical angle.

"Oh, just another Zhatonian tradition. A particularly stupid one, about which I will be having words."

Zhatoh was the rather backwards planet he was pretending to be from.

Nir extended four eye-tentacles and curved two each at Ianto and Chukran. "I heard something about today. Holt said he heard it was the pre-pack department's error, and seven of them are being fired."

Chukran folded her hands on the table, elegantly painted claw-tips touching. "I don't think that can be true," she said, her voice every bit as expressionless as her face, but her crest falling a few centimetres.

"You're right," Ianto said, thoughtfully. "If it was pre-pack's mistake it would never have passed level four checking, so there would only have been three departments involved at most, not all of us."

Nir swung one eye-tentacle around from Chukran to Ianto. "But if it did slip by four..."

"Hey! No shop talk." Jack wrapped his arms around Ianto's neck from behind, and kissed his cheek.

As he dropped into the chair between Ianto and Chukran, Ianto leaned over and said "you set me up," in twenty-first century English.

Jack grinned proudly, and (using thirty eighth century English, as per the rest of the conversation) said: "happy anniversary."

Nir pulled in all the tentacles on the upper third of his body until they were short, fat nubs and turned turquoise. Had he been human, he'd have been clasping his hands and squealing 'awww...' Chukran's crest twitched upwards. Ianto frowned. "I'm missing something."

"Six months since we arrived here. Thought we ought to celebrate."

"No, it isn't. It's barely been three."

"Earth months, not Kairon months."

"Oh. Really? Seems longer."

"Hi guys," Jack said to Nir and Chukran.

He said "hello," and she gave him a sharp nod.

"You singing tonight?" asked Nir, who had extended a few more eyes. He now had three on Jack, two each on Ianto and Chukran, and one on the menu.

Ianto pushed his thumb into the small depression on the table's edge to bring up his own menu, as Jack said, "yeah, but not for a few hours. I swapped shifts so I could spend some time with Ianto."

Nir went turquoise again. Ianto kept his eyes down, but bumped his ankle gently against Jack's.

"Whatcha having?" Jack asked, peering over at Ianto's menu.

"I'm too tired to read." It was true. His head was hurting, his eyes weren't all that happy about focusing, and his brain seemed to have forgotten about two-thirds of the Draconian alphabet. "Just pick me something with chlorophyll in it."

They ordered, and food and wine were brought by a young human woman in a neat, but somewhat revealing uniform. Three of Nir's eyes followed her as she walked away.

Ianto still didn't understand why every sentient race in the galaxy seemed to find humans so attractive. He had asked Jack, but all he had to say on the subject was that he was quite partial to them himself.

He applied himself to the food, gulping it down so fast he barely tasted it until he had taken the edge off his hunger, then worked his way steadily through the rest, only looking up when his plate was empty.

"You were hungry," Jack said with a laugh.

"Yes. I think I did mention."

He watched Nir finish the remains of his own meal. Sulamids didn't taste with their mouths, but rather with the tentacles around them. Ianto always enjoyed watching the rows of short sensing-tentacles dart over his food in little Mexican waves before he put in his mouth.

Nir topped up his wine glass before Ianto (who was already feeling rather floaty and affectionate) could protest.

"Dancing, or dessert?" Jack asked, leaning back in his chair and looking rather pleased with himself.

"I'm not sure I could manage either," Chukran said, arranging her cutlery neatly on her empty plate.

"How about a break, then some dancing, then some dessert?" Nir suggested.

"Sounds good to me. Ianto?"

"Whatever you like. Just prop me up in a corner when I fall asleep."

"Just think - you can stay in bed all day tomorrow."

They sipped wine and talked. The conversation was a little slow - Jack was resolute in not allowing work-related discussions, and everyone was tired. Eventually Jack and Nir went to dance, and Ianto found himself trying to explain the ancient Zhatonian 'surprise' ritual to Chukran.

Working for Torchwood, he'd had to face some peculiar situations. However, six months ago, the idea that he'd be sitting in a restaurant on another planet, telling an alien all about surprise parties while watching his boyfriend dance the waltz with someone who could only be described as a friendly tentacle monster would have seemed ludicrous.

A third person joined Jack and Nir, and they untwined a little to make room. Ianto smiled fondly. It was nice seeing Jack in his element. He had made the transition from saving the world to singing in a nightclub (interspersed with spaceship repair) with remarkable ease. Ianto had taken being relegated from overworked alien hunter (etc.) to semi-literate primitive sex object with rather less aplomb.

The song ended, and Ianto put up a token protest, but allowed himself to be dragged onto the dance floor for the next number. Another slow one, thankfully. He rested his chin on Jack's shoulder and let him steer.

"Don't fall asleep on me," Jack said softly into his ear. "You'll ruin my reputation."

"I'm not." He pressed his cheek against Jack's, feeling wonderfully content. He was warm and full and it was the weekend... Life in the future wasn't all that different. Go to work, pay bills, go out, get pissed... Of course, if they ever got the Pride spaceworthy... Back to Earth. Back to the rift. Back to the past, if they could manage it.

Jack's hands slid down until his fingers were just barely touching the curve of Ianto's arse.

"Take me home," Ianto whispered in his ear, snuggling shamelessly up to his erection.

"Oh, don't I just wish I could..." One hand moved down further to cup buttock in earnest, the other moved up to press between shoulder blades. Ianto laid his palm against the bare skin revealed by Jack's open shirt, and they kissed. Given that public sex was this culture's version of karaoke, what they were doing really wasn't noteworthy at all, although to Ianto's outdated sensibilities it still felt wonderfully daring.

Jack nipped gently along his jawline until he reached his ear, where he traced a tonguetip delicately around the edge. Ianto sighed with pleasure and wrapped his arms around his waist. "So, when," Jack asked, "are you going to put that poor boy out of his misery?"

"What?"

"Your young Sulamid friend. Who wants you so bad it's painful."

"What, Nir? We're just friends, Jack."

"Oh, come on! His species isn't exactly subtle about displaying their emotions, or didn't you notice him turning green every time you walked in the room?"

"Green means stressed. I looked it up."

"Dark green. Light green means 'take me now.'"

Ianto looked at him dubiously.

"He hasn't taken all of his eyes off you all night. Earlier, when you were licking all that sauce off your fingers, I think he forgot to breathe for a couple of minutes. You're always telling me how he goes out of his way to talk to you..."

"He's just interested in human culture."

"Yeah, you know why? Because he's planning on raising your kids with dual nationality." Ianto scowled at him. "And he's always buying you snacks, and presents..." Interlacing their fingers, he lifted Ianto's hand to emphasise the heavy bracelet around his wrist - a gift from Nir.

"Bollocks," Ianto said, with as much dignity as he could muster. "We're just friends."

Jack laughed and squeezed him tight. "And you're usually so perceptive."

"Just because you'll jump anything that'll look you in the eye doesn't mean that the rest of the galaxy's the same."

"All right, all right," Jack said, amusement in his voice. "I'm very sorry. It was wrong of me to suggest that you might be attractive, and you may whip me at your earliest convenience."

"There's a length of chain back at the dock that I've had my eye on, actually..."

"Oh, you're too damn kinky for me. C'mon, let's get cake."

The four of them assembled back in the restaurant. Two slices of cake and several glasses of something very sweet, sticky, and alcoholic later, Ianto was finally beginning to feel fully awake. They sat and talked, switching languages from thirty eighth century English to Draconian. Ianto felt very proud that he could follow most of the conversation unaided.

When it was time for Jack's shift, Chukran pleaded exhaustion and left for home. Ianto and Nir made noises about doing the same, decided to stay for just one song, then just one more... Nir wanted to know about traditional Zhatonian dances, so Ianto taught him to pogo. The two of them managed to crack Jack up in the middle of a song, and Nir bought the band drinks as an apology.

Later, when the tiredness had kicked back in again, they sat on the steps leading to the now-closed restaurant, shared some fruit-flavoured water and watched the rest of the set. Even if he didn't really get the music, Ianto loved watching Jack on stage.

Just as he was beginning to slump against the wall, Nir wrapped a few two-pronged manipulating tentacles around him to pull him upright. He yawned and rubbed at his eyes. "Sorry. This was such a bad idea. I should have been in bed hours ago."

"Tell me about it." A couple more tentacles discreetly draped themselves over him.

It occurred to Ianto that he'd never really touched the Sulamid before, and he ran curious fingers over the tentacle resting on his thigh. It felt a little like snakeskin, dry but slick, with a suggestion of strong muscle underneath. The bifurcated tip lifted and took hold of his hand, one branch between his thumb and forefinger, the other spiralling around his palm and down to his wrist. He lifted both their hands closer to his eyes, which were still having a little difficulty with focusing. Pulses of colour were moving down to the very tentacle-tips, pale green to turquoise and back again...

He watched, fascinated almost to the point of hypnotism, until one tentacle tip tapped him lightly on the nose. He jerked his head up, startled, and met seven amused eyes (one was pointing at the stage). "You can't fall asleep yet."

"I can, and I will."

"If you fall asleep, I'll fall asleep, and then they'll have to throw us both out into the gutter."

"Probably not very..." He trailed off, the Draconian word for 'comfortable' escaping him.

"No, probably not," Nir agreed anyway. "Come on, last song, we have to dance." The tentacles tugged insistently upwards.

"No, I can't."

"Yes, you can. Come on, we can pogo some more."

"Now, I definitely can't do that."

"Come on."

He let himself be dragged to his feet and back towards the dance floor, smothering a yawn as he went. A cool tentacle slipped between the bottom of his shirt and the top of his trousers and he shivered at the touch.

Nir snatched all his various tentacles back and turned pale blue with worry. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to..."

Ianto staggered slightly at the sudden loss of support. "It's all right, that's not a bad reaction, it just means..." He paused as he desperately racked his brain for the appropriate vocabulary; "...a sudden change of temperature. I'm fine, really." He reached out to reassuringly pat the nearest manipulation tentacle, but Nir was still getting paler by the second.

He backed away and folded himself into a corner of one of the couch/beds that surrounded the dance floor. Ianto followed, puzzled.

"I'm sorry," he said bleakly as Ianto sat down next to him. "I thought I hurt you."

"You didn't, I'm fine," Ianto repeated, shuffling closer. This particular piece of furniture always presented him with difficulties. It was most like a bed, but designed for sex, not sleeping. He usually found himself perching on the edge while everyone else was comfortably sprawling. He folded his legs underneath him and manoeuvred himself to Nir's side.

The Sulamid was beginning to look a little bluer. "I'd never even left the district before," he began, all eyes pulled in except one, which was weaving behind him in random patterns, "let alone the planet. And you were the first human who ever talked to me, and I've tried so hard, but I don't really know enough about your species..."

Ianto was about to say he knew exactly how he felt, when four eyes shot out to focus on him, and he paused, startled. Nir unfolded one of his short, single-tipped sensing tentacles, and brushed it lightly over Ianto's lips. *Oh,* he thought. *Well. Jack was right. He's going to be insufferable about this.* Nir was pulsing from blue to white, and Ianto was feeling a little nervous himself. He took a manipulation tentacle in his hand, and Nir wound it around his wrist like before. A few more broad, strong tentacles wrapped themselves gently around his body. He leaned in, and five sensing tentacles unfurled to meet him. Smiling a little, he licked the tip of the nearest, and it jerked up and away, then came back for more. The manipulating tentacles tightened around him, drawing him closer, and he felt the first warm flush of arousal.

He closed his eyes, opened his mouth, and let Nir explore, licking and sucking at any tentacles that lingered near his mouth. A manipulation tentacle began spiralling around his leg, slowly pulling him down onto the bed-couch...

He felt the soft surface dip behind him, then human hands rubbing gently at his shoulders. It was Jack, he could tell from his grip and the comfortingly familiar scent.

"Boys, I hate to interrupt you..." He pressed a light kiss behind Ianto's ear. "Believe me, I really hate to interrupt you, but we've gotta go."

Ianto opened his eyes. Nir was a rather pretty shade of fresh spring green, and the club was beginning to look distinctly closed. He stroked Nir's face. Sensing tentacles darted out to brush against his skin. "Come home with us?" The life-altering decision seemed so simple, now.

Nir turned questioning eyes on Jack, who just laughed and said "yes, please."

***

It was bitterly cold outside and the wind had worsened. By the time they had tramped across the city and back to the spaceport, Ianto's ears were aching, and his feet were numb. He felt as though he'd travelled straight through exhaustion and drunkenness to a state of increased awareness beyond. As Jack heaved open the Pride's door, Ianto and Nir shyly met each other's eyes.

The warmth inside was wonderful. Ianto struggled out of his coat, cold hands making heavy work of the fastenings, and sat down to unlace his boots. Nir gently batted his hands away and draped himself over his lap, his boneless body effortlessly curving to meet Ianto's. "Let me," he said softly. He removed the boots in a matter of seconds, and hooked off the socks beneath for good measure, even as he was winding tentacles around Ianto's upper body in a firm embrace.

"I wish I had as many hands as you," Ianto said ruefully.

"Hmmm. They're useful. Not so pretty, though." A sensing tentacle delicately traced across his mouth.

"Just a matter of opinion..."

Jack, already half-naked, slid in by his side. He cupped a warm hand against Ianto's cheek and turned him for a kiss. The familiar taste and feel of his lover, coupled with that of smooth tentacles, some of which were unfastening his clothes, others just sliding straight beneath, was wonderfully odd and exciting. Jack pulled back and turned to Nir, and Ianto watched, fascinated.

The short, sensitive tentacles on Nir's head were darting back and forth, quickly touching then pulling away. The rippling motion made him look almost aquatic, and contrasted with the two and four pronged tentacles below, which moved slowly and steadily to envelop limbs and bodies. Jack was nibbling at the sensing tentacles, mimicking their motion.

Given that Nir had already undone his top two layers, Ianto shrugged them off, and, bare to the waist, leaned against Jack's shoulder for a better view.

It really shouldn't be so hot. Before tonight he'd never given much thought to interspecies sex, except as an irritant when he had to slap someone's wandering hand away on a crowded tram. He wouldn't have thought watching Jack and Nir enthusiastically snogging would turn him on so much...

Strong, thick tentacles gripped his waist, and the tips of two of them began undoing his trousers. He knelt up to give Nir better access.

Jack, who had popped open the varied and complicated fastenings of his own fly one-handed and without looking, stood up to slide out of his thin, skin-tight trousers. Nir turned several eyes to give him a once-over.

"So, handsome," Jack said, putting an arm around Nir where his shoulders would have been if he'd had any, "you ever done this before?"

A little pink entered Nir's personal spectrum. "No..."

"I haven't either," Ianto added, for solidarity.

"I've seen movies, though."

"Okay," Jack sat down between them. "Step one - forget everything you've seen in the movies. They lie."

"But I liked the movies..."

The mock-petulant tone of his voice made Ianto smile.

"Nothing wrong with liking them, just don't trust them." He shifted onto his knees, legs spread, and took hold of one of Nir's two-pronged hands. "Step two - as long as you're gentle, you can touch anywhere except for eyes, but always leave either the nose or mouth free for breathing. You know nose and mouth?"

He curled up two tentacle tips. "Nose," he tapped the tip of Jack's nose as he'd done to Ianto at the club, "mouth." He traced Jack's lips and got a gentle nip.

"Right. So you can touch anywhere else, it all feels good, but here's where you want to concentrate..." He lifted Nir's hand back to his mouth, traced his lips again, and licked at the tips. He tilted his head back and slid both their hands down the length of his throat, "but nothing tight around here, okay?"

As Jack rubbed delicately green tentacles over his nipples, Ianto sat back against the pillows and slowly rubbed the heel of his hand over his crotch. *Teaching aliens how to love,* he thought. *And he said all the movies were wrong...*

Jack was cupping Nir's tentacles over his balls. "You have to be very gentle here. But here..." he moved them to wrap around his cock, "here's where it all happens. This is our version of this..." He reached into the crowded mass of tentacles about two thirds of the way down his body.

Nir pulled all his eyes back to nubs and made a delightful moaning sound. "Ianto?" Jack beckoned him forward and he shuffled over, feeling his loosened trousers slide down a little as he went. As soon as he was back in reach, Nir enveloped him again. Jack took his hand and guided it in. "You feel that?"

He followed Jack's fingers, and found a short, smooth protuberance. As he closed his hand around it, Nir squirmed and squeezed him tighter. He stroked it gently and felt it expand, throbbing against his palm.

"Best not do that too long," Nir said, breathlessly, "or it'll all be over too quick."

He stroked his fingers over the tip, where the slit would be in a human penis. There was no noticeable egress. As he pulled his hand back, Jack said, "he can't put it in you. Lady Sulamids are much more flexible than we are - we couldn't reach it."

"But we could have some fun trying," Ianto said.

Nir laughed, and Jack grinned, delightedly. "I like your attitude. By the way, were you planning on taking these off anytime soon?" He tweaked the waistband of Ianto's slowly descending trousers.

"I was waiting for one of you to take them off for me," he said with playful affronted dignity, and was promptly buried under a human/sulamid bundle. This wasn't terribly conducive to actual garment removal, although Nir pushed them down still further with the insertion of several tentacles, which curled right around Ianto's crotch.

Combined with the firm grip he still had on Ianto's chest and stomach, the sensation was rather amazing. He imagined it was probably something like Japanese rope bondage must feel, except the ropes wouldn't be warm and yielding and slowly squirming against his skin. Two tentacle tips slid over his scrotum (very gently, as Jack had instructed), and he closed his eyes and sighed with pleasure.

Jack wriggled a hand into Ianto's open fly, touched briefly at his balls where Nir was still exploring, squeezed his cock (Ianto moaned at that and arched his back), then swept upwards, stroking skin where it appeared between coils of tentacles, cupped his cheek, and kissed him.

Nir carefully squeezed his cock as Jack had done, and Ianto gasped into Jack's mouth, his hands closing tight on his shoulders. The unfamiliar sensation of tightly gripping tentacles made even Jack's kisses feel new and exotic. He stretched out a hand blindly towards Nir, who caught it in a two-pronged hand and held it. "You are so gorgeous," Nir said breathlessly, intertwining tentacle-tips with Ianto's fingers.

Ianto opened his eyes and looked down at himself. His trousers had made it down to his knees, his skin, where it could be seen for Nir and Jack covering him, was flushed, and his cock stood happily upright, being stroked by two of Nir's hands. He raised his eyes to meet three of Nir's. "You're not so bad yourself."

He smiled at the orange-pink flush that engendered. It was true - he'd liked the Sulamid from the moment they'd met. He'd been much more welcoming and helpful than many of their more humanoid co-workers. It hadn't taken him long at all to get over the strangeness, and within a week he'd been playfully teasing him to see him change colour. Right at this moment, it seemed ludicrous that he'd never thought of him sexually before tonight.

"Hey, what about me?"

Ianto lifted his other hand from Jack's shoulder to pat him condescendingly on the cheek. "Yeah, you're okay, too."

He sighed, and switched to 21st century English to say "one of these days, Ianto..."

Ianto smiled at him, and set about toeing off his trousers.

Nir touched Jack's hair lightly. "You're lovely. And you're beautiful together."

"Smooth talker. See if I don't just wrap you up and keep you forever."

He turned a light leaf green. "I couldn't ever be so lucky."

Ianto sat up to disentangle his feet. Nir's tentacles braced his back. Once he was finally naked, he got to his knees in front of Nir and pulled him into a full body hug. It felt wonderful, all the tentacles moving against him, rearranging themselves to wrap around him in this new configuration. He wondered if any of the protrusions he could feel pressing against him were Nir's penis-equivalent, and rubbed against him a little on general principles.

Heralded by the dipping of the mattress, Jack hugged him from behind. Sandwiched completely from both sides and held firm by Nir's strong limbs, a shiver ran through him. Nir froze for a second. "It's okay," Ianto told him, "it's good." He licked quickly at one of the sensing tentacles that was hovering near his face, and Nir's grip tightened momentarily as he pulled his eyes in to pleased nubs.

Ianto reached behind him, seized Jack's cock, which was insinuating itself between his buttocks and poking his coccyx, and tucked it between the tops of his thighs, closing his legs to hold it there. That earned a deep moan of pleasure in his ear, and soft lips and tongue against his neck.

Nir touched lightly at Ianto's balls, then beneath them to where the head of Jack's cock peeked out. A quick yellow pulse of amusement flickered over his body.

Ianto leaned in a little closer, looking curiously at his circular, deep brown eyes, three of which were currently in evidence. In response to his observation, another two shot out and curved towards him. Raising a hand, he touched gingerly the two long flaps that covered Nir's mouth. "You don't mind...?"

"I don't mind. It doesn't feel like anything special, though, It's not like yours." He plucked at Ianto's lower lip with a sensing tentacle. Ianto opened his mouth and they 'kissed'. He watched through half-closed eyes as Nir's eye-stalks curled upwards, then folded inwards. Every time he licked at one of the darting tentacles exploring his face and mouth, the furled eye-stalks twitched upwards again. It really was fascinating, learning a whole new body language.

Jack nibbled gently at his earlobe, and began to thrust, slowly. There was just enough sweat on their skin to allow his cock to slide, rubbing against Ianto's perineum and the base of his buttocks, and nudging his balls with every forward stroke.

He moved his hand down from Nir's face, gently pushing his fingers through the mass of tentacles to touch the solid body behind. He looked up anxiously, but Nir's eyes were still in the 'pleasure' position. His body felt a little warmer than his tentacles, and Ianto clasped a two-pronged hand to compare.

Nir pulled his hand downwards. Ianto explored with his fingers, and found the short, throbbing nub that Jack had guided him to earlier. As he caressed it, Nir began to make some very inspiring gasping moans. Ianto bent over to rest on his knees and elbows, Jack's cock slipping from between his legs as he moved. Nir moved with him and took some of his weight. "You don't mind if I look, do you?" he asked, keeping up his gentle stroking.

"Anything you like..."

He eased the tentacles apart. Nir parted them for him once he understood what he was doing. Jack had been right about it being inaccessible - it was surrounded by the thick, inflexible roots of several powerful walking tentacles. It was quite visible, being several shades darker than the flesh around it, and it was smooth and uniform, from root to softly-rounded tip. Ianto pressed his cheek against one of the folded-back walking tentacles and managed to take the tip into his mouth. Nir made a noise very much like a yelp, and his grip tightened convulsively. Ianto pulled back. "Is that okay?"

"Yes! Yesyesyes!"

Grinning, he eased his face back down into the nest of tentacles. He found that he could take the tip in his mouth, and, by pushing both hands up flat together, as though he were praying, rub the shaft between his fingertips, occasionally rubbing his fingers over the spit-slick tip to gain lubrication.

"Nir, tell him when you're going to come," Jack said, his hands cradling Ianto's hip bones. "And, Ianto, don't let him come in your mouth. Sulamid ejaculations are a bit too... forceful. And maybe, if you get me very drunk, I'll tell you the story of how I came to discover this."

Ianto nodded, causing Nir to squeeze him tight again for a second. Jack's hands trailed over his buttocks, the small of his back, stroked down the backs of his thighs, then up again to cup his buttocks and ease them apart... A short pause, then a slick finger slowly stroked inbetween, circled his entrance, mutely asking permission.

He arched his back, tilted his hips upwards, and spread his legs a little wider.

Jack chuckled. "Love it when you do that." He pushed his finger gently inside.

It felt wonderful. Suddenly it was just what he'd wanted all along, but hadn't realised until this moment. He slipped his mouth off Nir's penis-equivalent and stroked the shaft in a spiral motion, spreading the slickness down. "Love it when you do that. More, please."

"My pleasure." He slid another finger in beside the first and twisted them.

Ianto gasped and reverted to 21st century English: "yes, yes, fuck, yes..."

Nir wrapped a hand around Ianto's fingers, stilling them. "Slow down... I'm getting close, and I want to watch him have you before it's over."

He slowed right down, using just his fingertips to trace intricate patterns. Jack's fingers curved inside him, and he squirmed with pleasure.

"Think you're ready now?" Jack asked, quietly.

"Yes. Definitely. Yes."

The fingers went away. He peered back over his shoulder to watch Jack spreading lube on his cock. Their eyes met, and he got a bright smile. As Jack's hands settled back on his hips, he turned his attention back to Nir, whose tentacle tips were skating skittishly through his hair.

"Careful," Jack warned, rubbing the head of his cock between Ianto's buttocks.

"Don't worry, I'll tell you when..." Nir trailed off as Ianto began lapping the very tip.

He paused, and concentrated on relaxing as Jack pushed inside.

"You okay?"

"Yes... yes, just hold still for a minute."

He draped himself over Ianto's back to murmur in his ear, "you feel so good. You're so hot and tight. We definitely need to do it this way round more often."

"I'll remember you said that..." He paused as Nir coiled a hand around his cock and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Yes, like that... a little bit harder..."

"Like this?"

"Wait... Nir, let go a second..." Jack reached around and gave Ianto two firm, decisive pumps, in the process, transferring the lube from his hand. Completely involuntarily, Ianto pushed back against him as hard as he could, his eyes squeezed shut and his head arched back. "Try it now," Jack told Nir with a grin.

He did. The coils of tentacle surrounding Ianto's cock felt amazing. It was a little like being inside a very tight arsehole, but better, as each loop moved independently. For a few minutes, he forgot entirely that he'd been in the process of giving Nir a blow job and just floated on the sensations, until Nir tugged his hand back up to his cock-equivalent.

"Oh. Right. Sorry."

"That's all right. I assume it means I'm doing it right."

"Very right." Experimentally, he tried a short thrust. Jack's beautiful big cock slid within him, and they both moaned.

"Yeah?" Jack asked, his hands tightening on Ianto's hips.

"Yeah."

He moved slowly at first, then began to speed up. Nir soon got the idea, and gripped Ianto's shoulders firmly, giving him something to brace against. Ianto kept one hand on the mattress, the other on Nir's penis-substitute, licking at the tip on every forward stroke.

It didn't take long before Nir, whose green colouration was now being augmented by waves of clashing red, called out: "Ianto, I..." Before he got any further, Jack hauled Ianto upright - he yelped at the sudden new angle of penetration - without missing a stroke. Nir leaned the upper portion of his body forward, and flicked several sensing tentacles over Ianto's mouth.

Ianto, wriggling into a more comfortable position on Jack's cock, was a little taken aback at the sulamid version of a passionate kiss, but recovered quickly and kissed back, closing his eyes and pumping his hand to the same rhythm Jack was setting.

He felt the shudder run through the tentacles wrapped around his body just before Nir came.

His first thought was *ow.* His second was, *wow, Jack wasn't kidding.* Followed by *well, I'm definitely going to have to change the sheets now.*

He scraped his hand over his face, and opened his eyes cautiously. The force had been momentary but all-encompassing, like a riot hose set to mist. Nir's penis-substitute had already retreated out of his hand, and now Nir flopped theatrically backwards, tentacles drawing inwards, body orange with contentment.

Jack was holding still. "You okay?" he asked.

"Yes." He pushed back a little against the cock still buried inside him. "Wow. That was impressive."

"Thank you," Nir called, waving a tentacle at them, then giggling happily.

Ianto ran a curious finger over his stomach, collecting more of the substance that covered him from head to knee. It was much thinner than human semen - almost watery. He licked his finger. It didn't taste of anything in particular, just very slightly salty.

Jack, lightly spattered himself, despite Ianto's service as a human shield, laughed and licked his cheek. "C'mon," he pulled out, and Ianto gasped. "I've got an idea." He manoeuvred Ianto onto his back and pulled his legs up over his own shoulders.

"Good idea," Ianto said, grateful to have his weight off his knees. "But slowly," he added, feeling the blunt tip nudging against him. While it had all felt wonderful during the sex itself, since Jack had pulled out, his body had been reminding him just how long it had been since they'd done it this way.

Jack eased back in slowly. Nir sat up, pulled all his eyes in, and then pushed them out as far as they'd go (Ianto supposed that was how sulamids rubbed their eyes). He peered between them, and Jack obligingly spread his thighs a little to provide a better view. Nir touched lightly where they joined, and turned three eyes to Ianto. "Doesn't that hurt?"

"A little. But in a good way." He took one of Nir's hands and pulled it to where his cock was tapping against his belly. "More? Please?"

Nir took on a slight pink tinge. "Oh. All right. Did you like it?"

"Yes! Keep doing it a little longer, and I'll show you how much I like it."

Jack laughed at that, then helpfully snagged the lube when the rapidly drying come on Ianto's cock made it a bit too sticky for a proper tentacle job.

Nir lay down, head to foot with Ianto, and took the opportunity to explore. Keeping the two prongs of one hand coiled around Ianto's cock, he draped several others over his body, leaving trails in the layer of come.

Ianto closed his eyes and sighed with pleasure, still feeling a little floaty from the alcohol. With his head tilted back, it felt as though the whole ship was slowly rotating backwards. He felt a smile creep across his face.

"What?" Jack asked, smiling back.

"How do I let you talk me into these things?"

"Hey, you can't blame me for this one."

He had a retort, but it fled his mind as Nir discovered his toes and began weaving thin, flexible tentacles between them. He gave a half-laugh, half-moan, and let his head fall back again.

Nir worked his way back upwards as Jack's rhythm began to quicken. Ianto looked down to see his genitals being subjected to Nir's in-depth analysis. As delicate tentacle-tips curled beneath his foreskin, Jack brushed a hand down his arm, and he reached up to take it, interlacing their fingers. Nir's drying come pulled at his skin when he moved.

"You feel," Jack murmured between thrusts, "so good. And you two... look so... incredibly... hot... together."

Ianto squirmed against him by way of thanks, and Nir went turquoise. He abruptly surged up Ianto's body, and subjected him to another sensing-tentacle-invasion kiss. This time, Ianto cupped his free hand against the sulamid's face, steadying and slowing him. Jack leaned over, bending himself almost double, to join them. He kissed Ianto open-mouthed, letting Nir's sensing tentacles dart in and caress their tongues.

Ianto could feel his orgasm building. Cradled and supported between Jack and Nir, he let the delicious anticipation climb. From the sound of his breathing, he could tell Jack was also close. He let the familiar sounds of his lover push him over the edge, and they came together, crying out and clutching hands tightly.

Satisfied and perfectly sated, Ianto rolled over and closed his eyes for just a second. When he opened them again, the clock beside the bed told him it was tomorrow.

Blinking in muzzy confusion, he looked over at his bed-mates. Jack and Nir were fast asleep, nose to mouth-flaps. He smiled fondly at them, then winced as he looked down at himself. His coating of come had dried into an itchy, flaky patina that made him look as though he had a bad case of eczema. He caught himself thinking that next time he let Nir come all over him he would have to make sure he washed before falling asleep, and smiled. He rolled out of bed and hastened to the shower.

***

Having scrubbed himself thoroughly, he emerged. Jack seemed to have had a burst of domesticity, as the sheets had been changed, and he and Nir were lounging on the bed, picking over a tray of breakfast.

"Any of that for me?" Ianto asked.

Nir contracted his body up to the pillows, and patted the vacated space invitingly. Ianto took his place at the tray and began nibbling.

"Tired you out last night, did we?" Jack asked, smugly.

Ianto felt himself blush. "Sorry."

"So you should be. Very poor etiquette."

Nir wound a hand around his wrist. "Don't be sorry. Everything was wonderful."

Jack rolled over onto his back and stretched. "Yeah, it was."

"I think you missed a bit," Nir said thoughtfully, running tentacle-tips lightly down Jack's body. "When you were telling me where to touch."

"Yeah?" Jack had his hands tucked behind his head and his eyes closed, enjoying the attention. "Where'd I miss?"

Nir twined his hands into Jack's toes, as he'd done for Ianto the previous night.

"Ah. You're quite right, I skipped over feet, didn't I?" He freed a hand, and swotted Ianto lightly. "Why didn't you say?"

Ianto swallowed hastily. "I was a little distracted at the time. Sorry."

"Well, anyway, well spotted. Feet are very sensitive. Especially the arches underneath and the toes." He wriggled his toes in the air by way of demonstration.

Propping himself up on one elbow, Ianto watched Nir flow down Jack's body to thoroughly investigate his feet. Two brown eyes peered back at him, and he smiled happily. Nir's eyes tilted up and disappeared.

Thinking that he could really get used to this, Ianto finished his mouthful, relocated the breakfast tray to the floor, and joined Nir in crawling all over Jack.

He kissed his way down his lover's smooth chest and belly to come face to face with his rapidly filling cock. Resting his chin on Jack's hip, he looked up into his happy, smug grin. "Hic habitat felicitas," he said quietly to himself, and slipped his lips over Jack's plump cockhead.

"What?" Jack asked, and the startled tone of his voice, coupled with the use of twenty-first century English, made Ianto look up.

Letting the cock slide out of his mouth, he said, "it's from Pompeii..."

"I know," Jack interrupted. "'Here lives happiness', carved next to one of these." He curled his fingers around his own cock, and brushed it over Ianto's lips. He licked at the tip, obligingly. "It's been so damn long since anyone spoke Latin while they were going down on me..." he trailed off, and laughed, ruefully. "You just surprised me a bit, that's all."

Nir had been watching them bemusedly during this (to him, incomprehensible) conversation, while tentacles continued to move over Jack's toes.

Ianto accepted Jack's crumb of information without comment, and carried on where he'd left off, sliding his curled fist up and down Jack's shaft, and twirling his tongue around the head, interspersed with occasional deep-throating. He watched Nir tickling his toes, and reached up to play with Jack's nipples. When he came (with a deep satisfied moan), Ianto drank him down.

He kept his cock in his mouth - no longer for the purpose of fellatio, it was still soft from his orgasm - but just for the comfort of having it in his mouth, resting quietly on his tongue. It felt good like that, not as jaw-achingly vast as when it was erect, but just the right size to gently suckle.

Jack rolled over on his side, wrapped his arms around Ianto's thighs and pulled them into a sixty-nine position. Ianto nuzzled forward until his nose was pressed into Jack's pubic hair. He breathed in the scent of his lover and felt himself growing harder, even as Jack took him to the root in one easy, fluid motion.

He pulled in a sharp breath through his nose. Jack's hands were massaging his buttocks, and he could feel delicate touches of tentacles making their way down his calf.

As Nir twined his hands around his feet, tickling and massaging, Jack began to slide up and down in broad, competent strokes. Ianto's eyes flicked down to take in Jack's hollowed cheeks and splayed lips, then his own betentacled toes. He stroked Jack's hip and thigh, and closed his eyes to concentrate on the sensations.

He came almost embarrassingly quickly, letting Jack's cock slip free and crying out in pleasure. Jack milked him thoroughly to the last drop, and they both slumped onto their backs.

Nir draped himself over Ianto's thighs, his head resting on his hip. He ran a hand up his stomach, over his chest, and back again. "You've got more fur than he has," he observed, thoughtfully.

Somewhat ridiculously, after everything they'd done together, Ianto felt himself blush. Jack joined Nir in stroking his chest, his fingers carding through the hair. He gave Ianto a grin. "Some have more than others," he explained. "Some remove it for aesthetic reasons. Depends on personal preference and what's in fashion."

Nir stretched out another hand to stroke Jack, orange tentacle-tips brushing across smooth pink skin. "So, did you give in to fashion?"

"Nope, this is all me."

Ianto reached out for Nir. "Do you want...?" he ran his fingers through the tentacles of his lower body, but Nir took his hand and stilled it.

"No, I'm all right."

"Sulamid recovery time's about a week," Jack told him. "He's all done for a while, I'm afraid."

"Really? Well," Ianto said, "this has all been a learning experience. For one, I've never been so completely covered in come in my entire life."

Jack laughed and dropped a kiss onto his shoulder. "You've obviously been going to the wrong sorts of parties." He stretched and yawned. "Much as I'd love to, I can't hang around here all day. Got to see a lizard about a system stabiliser." He clambered off the bed and began locating clothes.

"I should probably go too," Nir said. "Unless..." He turned a couple of eyes shyly in Ianto's direction. "There's an exhibition of Earth sculpture... You could come with me, if you like? If you're not too busy." Behind his back, Jack gave Ianto a wide grin and a thumbs-up.

"I didn't have anything planned. All right, then."

Nir told them about the exhibition while Ianto dressed, trying not to get in Jack's way too much.

On his way out the airlock, Jack kissed them both. "Have fun you two. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." He addressed Nir, a tone of half-joking formality in his voice. "I hope we shall be seeing more of you."

Flushing turquoise, Nir pulled his eyes up and in. "I hope so, too."

Jack grinned, heaved back the door, and departed.

"Don't spend too much," Ianto called after him.

"You do want working gravity, don't you?"

Once Jack had gone and Ianto had finally hunted down his boots, he and Nir walked out of the spaceport in companionable silence.

The sun was out, although the wind was still cold. Ianto turned up his collar and stuffed his hands into his pockets.

They were waiting by the tram lines when Ianto felt a wind-chilled tentacle snake slowly around his wrist. He pulled his hand out of his pocket, and smiled at Nir. They waited for the tram, hand in hand.

***

fin

***
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