Dear Baby Reid

“When you create a soul, plant the seeds of love with your thoughts, words, and actions. The soul flourishes among the flow-ers of love.”

― Revathi Sankaran

 

Week 6, May 7^th 2013

                Derek stood up from the bed, frowning as he heard his younger lover in the bathroom again. He headed toward their shared bathroom, opening the door slightly to see Spencer hunched over the porcelain throne.  He knew that Spencer had been feeling ill, but it had been that way for close to three weeks now. And he may not be a genius like his lover, but he knew that the flu and food poisoning did not last that long.

                “You don’t look well at all.” Derek spoke gently, carefully putting his hand on the younger male’s back. “I say we go to the hospital and get it checked out. If it is nothing serious and it happens to be a bad strain of the flu, we’ll go home and I’ll have you rest.  But I am worried about you, Spencer.  You can’t get any skinnier.”

                “Actually if I don’t eat, it is possible to get skinnier than I am.”   Spencer replied, looking up at Derek before he hesitantly sat back from the toilet.  He hoped that he was done with the vomiting for now so he could actually stand up and go to the hospital without messing up the interior of Derek’s sports car.

                “Its okay, Pretty Boy.” Derek smiled, helping Spencer up from the floor gently before putting his arm around the younger male’s waist and putting Spencer’s arm around his shoulders.  “Just walk with me.”

Inova Alexandria Hospital

Alexandria , VA

                Derek helped Spencer into Dr. Akihito’s office, looking up at the older doctor he had become familiar with over the last few years. With a combination of everything his younger lover had gone through. 

                “This is definitely something interesting, Spencer.” Dr. Akihito spoke gently, a faint Japanese accent coming through in his voice. “Your symptoms are not food poisoning related, and it isn’t the flu. You don’t have a fever and your chest isn’t congested.”

                “What is it then?” Spencer asked, feeling his lover squeeze his shoulder gently.  “If it’s not the flu or food poisoning, what is it?”

                “I’ll send you down to the obstetrics wing where Dr. Anya Katska will do a thorough check, but the tests are showing a high level of progesterone.”  Dr. Akihito replied.  “She will be your primary obstetrician as she specializes in male pregnancies along with normal high risk.”

                “Pregnant?” Spencer blinked, looking at the doctor in surprise.  “That isn’t possible…”

                “Dr. Katska can tell you more.” Dr. Akihito smiled a little. “I will still be your doctor, but she will be your OB. And you still have options.”

                Spencer nodded, frowning lightly as he stood up from the chair. A million questions going through his head, he knew how it happened.  He just  didn’t think it was possible to get pregnant. And he was overwhelmed with many different feelings.

                “It’s okay. I’ll be there every step of the way.”  Derek spoke as they walked down the hall to Dr. Katska’s office, and so they could get a sonogram to see how far along Spencer was. And also to make sure that the baby was okay. 

                Dear Baby,

                I know that you won’t be a baby until you are born in a few months, but it seemed odd saying dear embryo to me. This will be the first entry of hopefully many to come in this journal.  Today I discovered something that I didn’t even think I was possible. I think it even surprised Derek, but you would call him daddy.  I am scared, I will not lie. I’m also still in shock. Everything is going to change so quickly.

                I know I just found out about you, and I am unsure about how I will be as a parent. I know I have your father for support, and I am very grateful for that. And I will make sure he stays around so you can have both parents with you. This is all very new for me, and I know I have JJ and Fran for help as well if I have any questions.

                I don’t plan on telling your many aunts and uncles yet. A lot can happen, and if I do happen to lose you due to a miscarriage I will be saddened as would everyone else who would find out.  I will tell them once I reach the safe point of pregnancy and the risk of miscarriage goes down exponentially.  I will also tell your grandmothers when I think the time is right, but knowing your father he is already calling his mom telling her the good news.

                Right now you look like a tadpole or jellybean, and are only .25 inches long.  You are the size of a sweet pea outside of the pod. Your little brain is only the size of a poppy seed right now, but I know in the next few weeks all of your organs will develop along with the rest of you.  You will continue to grow, as well as myself.

                And as scared as I am, I do love you. You’ve been around with me for   six weeks, even though technically you are only four weeks old, but I hope that you stick around for the next 34 weeks or so. I can’t even think about losing you.

                But I will be writing you again next month. By then you will be bigger and look a little more like a person. Right now you are an embryo, but soon you will be a fetus.  And that alone will be a big milestone. I plan on doing this monthly unless there is a big milestone that I feel I should write to you about.

                Until then, grow strong and try to make this easy on me.  But I won’t blame you for any of it. As for what I will be called, I have to think that over and talk with your father about it.

Love,

Spencer