Chapter Eight

I like the raw sentiment you capture with Dean. It's done marvelously. The internal struggle was shown very well - I could even see him pacing, both while he was in his room after the entire scene, and figuratively while he was in the room with them.

I also like the dynamic you've developed between Sam and Lucifer. I adore the way that the relationship was basically thrust into Dean's face without him walking into a potentially embarrassing moment. His first reactions were done very well.

The dog was a particularly nice touch as far as breaking the tension and giving Dean something else to focus on for a few moments. Though, I have to admit that keeping a dog locked up with that particular odor is a rather different approach.

And I adore the fact that Dean can't be bothered to wait for answers - and even seems to have forgotten about the hellhound guards as he's making his flight to Sam's room.

Chapter Nine

I am so glad you didn't end the last chapter with the section before the first line break. I just have to say that.

And -wow- did you deliver! The anticipation of the scene with Lucifer and Sam was well worth the wait! I can well imagine that it took Lucifer quite some time to get Sam comfortable with the idea of handling himself, given just how tense Sam was the first time Lucifer even touched him. When Dean joined in, well, that was an excellent scene.

I like the fact that you describe it so fluidly. It's very easy to picture the actions, and the way you've written it, the tempo is evident as well. Thank you for that.

Chapter Ten

So Lucifer thinks he's just going to go back to his old habits and only see Sam at night once this bond is complete, hm? I predict a very rude awakening at some point.

I have to say that I like the fact that Sam is more accepting of what happened than Dean. You've done a great job of demonstrating Dean's oft-hidden prudery and overcoming it as well.

I find it interesting that the first time Dean is alone with Lucifer he's not able to focus on anything besides his own embarrassment. I like that Lucifer makes him face it, that he explains a bit of what he's done so that Dean does have that slight scapegoat; but how he also lets him know in very certain terms that it was his own desires he was acting on, nothing manufactured. And I find it very interesting that Dean mentions he's not willing to have sex with Satan, but he's willing to debauch his brother on a regular basis.

Dean's reaction to Sam's need of Lucifer was also very telling - I could picture him glowering at them while Sam is obliviously snogging the lord of all evil.

The bond you have forming between Chien and Dean is also interesting, especially given that his breed is something of which Dean has an inherent fear.

Chapter Eleven

“Dude, no offense, but can you give it a minute? This is almost over and I want to hear this,”

HA! Hilarious! Absolutely priceless! I'm gasping for air, that was so perfectly executed. Beautiful, really!

I love your propensity for double entendre, I really do. It effortlessly breaks the tension at just the right moment.

I like the insight into Lucifer at the end here, his perceptions of Dean specifically. Dean does evoke negative sentiments in a lot of those around him, not necessarily to his person, but just in a general sort of way. He's a negative person most of the time, and he tends to spread that about. Whether that's intentional is subjective, but I can certainly see how Dean's natural propensities would be detrimental to Lucifer's goals. Fortunately for Lucifer, Dean's not that perceptive.

Chapter Twelve

Another very well-written sex scene. I like that Lucifer had to end a meeting so he could personally assess the situation with Sam and Dean, as well as participate.

It's interesting that both Dean and Lucifer are extremely jealous of one another. Expected, but interesting nonetheless.

And I now have this image of Lucifer, naked, standing before Jehovah. I never in my life thought I would have that image in my head, but there it is, just the same. Quite comical, honestly. :)

Very well done, as always, and of course I'm looking forward to more!
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I have to say, though I expected Lucifer to pull the "big brother" routine, it's slightly disturbing to think that there's this demon assigned to watch Dean - and that demon is present even during his self-gratification. I can just imagine the moment that he slips and calls out Sam's name at climax, hearing a quick scurrying as the particular being assigned to him rushes off to tell Lucifer that tidbit.

You've done an excellent job at showing Lucifer's concern for Sam's well-being, even if it is a self-serving concern. I like that he's fully intent on arousing him, but while he's doing so, he's aware that there is an improper way to do so that would actually have a negative impact on his goal.

he was already starting to plan out how going there with Sam could work into his plans for Dean ... I have deliciously naughty images in my head now. Thank you! :)

It isn't like you and I are lovers or close that way. Oh, Sammy... That was the prefect set up, really, to what followed, even though it was a bit cliche. Still, you did an excellent job with the entire scene between Lucifer and Sam. I especially liked how you described the sensations Lucifer was feeling, how the combination of the foreign sensation of his own arousal with the familiar sensation of Sam's heightened the sensations for him.

The way you end the chapter with Sam not balking at the reminder that Lucifer is not a human partner and doesn't have the limitations of one, demonstrates well the need Sam has had for the tension relief he just experienced. I'm looking forward to the next chapter (there's still one more for me to read before I have to bite my nails for updates!).

As always, thank you for sharing, and happy writing!
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I went back, because (shamefully) it has been too long since I have read this story, and started at the beginning. In light of what I know is coming, Sam would be a brain damaged, gibbering mess that would need constant care for the rest of his life. is incredibly hilarious to me. It's still dark and foreboding, and given the second chapter, very apropos. And it makes me smile to see foreshadowing that doesn't browbeat me. So, starting this long overdue review by saying thank you for being willing to share your craft with us lowly mortals who come to a site to read for free.

Rereading the first intimacy in chapter three made me realize that Lucifer was actually a very keen observer of the human condition. He recognized not only the fact that Sam felt pleasure that helped increase the flow of power, but also, on some level, he understood that forcing such a feeling of pleasure from Sam would ultimately be detrimental to his cause. I like how you display these things so fluidly and subtly in your tale.

Four

Lucifer's manipulation in this scene was set very well. I find myself extremely curious as to what Cas was thinking throughout this encounter, though. Because while I'm certain Lucifer was careful while jaunting through Bobby's and Dean's minds, I'm equally sure that Cas had to have been able to tell that something was taking place. If nothing else, Lucifer in the mirror would have seemed somewhat distracted.

I find it interesting that Lucifer referred to Cas as an angel in such a way that it seems he doesn't consider himself one. These little snippets of insight into Lucifer are quite intriguing!

Five

I think you captured Joshua very well. The interlude hints at so much...

The dark tone you set with the meeting is done very well. And the reference to how Castiel will be affected by what Asmodeous is to set in place is intriguing.

The bit about Lucifer losing his virginity was hilarious!

I'm intrigued by the thought of the mirror scenario with Lucifer. (keeps reading to see if that played out in the next chapter...)

Six

I find it intriguing that Dean doesn't want to analyze any further what may have caused the dream to come to him at just this time. He always was a bit too eager to drop an uncomfortable subject just before reality could actually clarify an occurrence.

I did notice it last chapter, and I notice again here, that you're being vague in your descriptions of the dreams - and I like that. It lends to the fantasy, and is building a tension that will likely be explosive at some point in the near future.

I like the comment about Cas not being able to differentiate with regards to television.

It's interesting how Cas immediately recognizes that part of the lust he is feeling is not from his host. And I like how you have him acknowledge the fact. You capture that particular facet of his personality quite well. Intriguing as well is his decision to keep the entire episode from Dean and Bobby.

My dear, while you do have two more chapters already posted, and I am most eager to read them, I fear I must needs take a breather for a bit, as life intervenes.

Thank you once more for sharing, and I am looking forward to reading the rest!
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