Silenced Screams

Chapter Twenty-Five


His anger and rage barely contained, Jack swiped his car. He slung the door open with such force it bounced off the wall, hitting him in the back as he stormed into the room. Caught completely off guard, it took Dr McKenzie several seconds to recover enough to summon help. Jack had stormed in and gone straight for Turner. His blinding rage was all consuming. He'd waited a long time to put a face to the nightmare they'd all been living. And it had now turned out to be someone they all knew. But as guilt-ridden as he'd been since he'd discovered the whole truth about Turner and everything he'd been made to suffer, it did not excuse the things he'd done. He'd been so caught up in the 'who' of Sam's rape and torture he was only just now realizing the 'why'. REVENGE. And then it hit him. Everything Turner had done to her was done to hurt him. He was the reason she'd been brutally raped and tortured. It was all his fault. A choked 'Oh my god' broke free from his chest, the realization enough to kill him. The only thing staying his suicidal hand was his need to exact justice for Sam. He'd have plenty of time later to deal with his own guilt.

Grabbing Turner by the front of his shirt he lifted him, banging him against the concrete wall, slamming him repeatedly as his shouts grew in volume.

“It was you all along! You did this! WHY? If you had a score to settle with me YOU COME TO ME! She never did anything to you!”

Jack continued banging Joe against the wall even though he put no effort into defending himself, allowing Jack to throw him around like a rag doll. He didn't even seem to be aware that he was being beaten as he hung limply in Jack's hands.

The entire scene had only gone on a few seconds before the others rushed into the room, spurred on by the violence they could hear coming from the room. Accessing the situation immediately, Teal'c moved to separate the men as McKenzie simply watched on, not attempting to enter the physical altercation. The SF’s who'd been dispatched, were dismissed by the General as things began to sort themselves out.

Janet rushed to join McKenzie in evaluating Turner's physical and psychological condition after such a traumatic incident. Teal'c was forced to physically restrain Jack to keep him from doing Turner further bodily harm. The General signaled that they should move closer to the door in case the Colonel couldn't be controlled and had to be removed. But he wanted this whole situation resolved as soon as possible. It had caused enough of a disruption to Base operations already. They needed answers and a solution soon. With the two groups as far apart as possible, he turned his attention back to the Colonel's allegations as the others tried to reason with him.

“Don't you get it? He did it! It had to be him. It all fits. He's the one we've been looking for all this time and he's been right under our noses!” Jack shouted, trying to free himself from Teal'c's iron grip.

“Come on, Jack, be reasonable. Look at him,” Daniel challenged, gesturing to the man now sitting on the foot of his bed staring out blankly at some imaginary spot on the wall. “There's no way he'd be able to do those things.” Daniel's voice was calm and reassuring, a glaring counterpoint to Jack's as he continued to fight against Teal'c’s hold.

“Colonel, Daniel's right. It would be physically impossible in his condition.” Janet, satisfied with Turner's condition, had moved to re-join the other group and add her professional voice to the mix trying to get through to the Colonel.

“I don't care what his condition is! I'm telling you, it was him!” he yelled. Raising his voice even louder, he directed his next statement to Turner, hoping to get some response from him so the others could see him for what he truly was. “TELL 'EM! TELL 'EM YOU DID ALL OF THIS JUST TO GET BACK AT ME!”

Daniel spoke into the stunned silence Jack's last comment had caused, hoping to reason with Jack, to make him see how far-fetched and ludicrous his idea really was. “Jack, don't you see, if all he wanted was revenge against you, why'd he kill Hanson? You'd never even heard of the man until all this started.”

Getting his second wind, he opened his mouth to further challenge Jack's theory and was shocked to hear the quiet sing-song voice of Captain Turner speaking. Turning his attention to Turner, along with the others, he stared dumbstruck at Turner, who was still sitting peacefully on the foot of his bed, rocking back and forth and staring out at nothing as he spoke almost to himself.

“He wasn't in the plan. You must stick to the plan, ALWAYS. People get killed when you don't stick to the plan. He wasn't in the plan. Couldn't let that happen. I had to get him out of the way before he ruined everything. It was the only way.” Turner continued rambling on, rocking and staring blankly into a night only he could see. Everyone stood frozen, listening as the last of this man's sanity slowly unraveled.

“But why, Captain, after all this time...all these years? If this was all just about revenge against Colonel O'Neill, why'd you wait so long? It's been over thirty years!” McKenzie prodded, trying desperately to understand and direct Turner's memories for an explanation of his timing.

“Thought he was dead all this time. I should really thank Senator Kinsey...I thought it was all over years ago...had moved on...started wandering around...no reason to stay here anymore. I thought it was over after Charlie. He disappeared...'ate a bullet' after Charlie, they said. Then one day...there he was on my TV, all 'spit and polish' in all his medals with the good Senator. He wasn't dead...hadn't been dead, and now that I knew...I had to...had to make him pay...make him suffer...finish what I started all those years ago...only this time I wouldn't stop until it was over...until I had made him pay for everything he'd done to us.” There was very little holding his mind in the present, as he sat, hand resting in his lap, emotionless he began to reveal all.

Fearing he already knew the answer but needing to confirm it, Dr. McKenzie had to ask, “Why Major Carter? She hadn't done anything to you. ”

Barely above a whisper Turner explained, “First rule of combat...hit them where it hurts.” He made it sound like he was reading instructions from a manual. Which he probably had done as part of the training he'd received to serve his country. Lost for a minute, stunned by his matter-of-fact delivery, no one knew what to say or do. Even Jack had ceased his struggles.

“O'Neill had to pay for what he did. Killing him would be too easy...too quick. He had to suffer...suffer the same way he left me to suffer. I tracked him...studied him...learned his every move...his weaknesses…the one person who would cause him to suffer the most. Then I studied her...learned everything there was to know about her. Learned her schedule...followed her day after day...everywhere she went...everything she did...until the time was right for the next phase. But then HE almost destroyed everything. If I had been one minute later HE'D have destroyed everything. But he won't bother us again. He'll never ruin my plans again. He wasn't worthy. He had no right to be there. He had no respect for her. She was a soldier...a better soldier than him. He shouldn't have been there. All he wanted was to get his use out of her then kill her...he would never have given her the chance to fight back, soldier to soldier. He was sloppy and unprofessional. I couldn't allow him to do that. It was a good plan. She was a worthy opponent, a strong soldier...never gave up...never broke...never stopped fighting.” Stunned at how much respect they could hear in his description, his next whispered statement was almost too low to hear.

“Not like me...I broke...gave up and stopped fighting. It might have been different...if...” He was lost to them again. Lost in his own past…rewriting his own history...seeing the difference her strength would have made to him had he only been as strong as she. But only for a moment before his mind shook it off and returned to the present as their voices continued to question.

“How'd you know about the Colonel's son? How long have you been following him?” McKenzie continued to question. He knew how tightly the Colonel guarded his personal life. He'd been at the SGC for some time before anyone knew of Charlie and then only because of the 'Blue Crystal Energy' creature. He could well see them never having learned of him otherwise. This man spoke of it almost with an intimacy born of first-hand knowledge.

“I know everything there is to know about Colonel Jack O'Neill. Had to make sure he paid for what he did. I followed his every move.” His emotionless delivery sent chills down everyone's spine as he described the things he'd done to avenge the horrible wrongs that had been done to him. “It didn't take much to track him down after I was pieced back together and shipped state-side. But it took almost three years...that pathetic excuse for a hospital had to put me back together...after everything those monsters did to me before they tired of me...dumped me on the side of the road with the trash. But then I got back, only to learn that he'd let everyone believe I was dead.” He stopped speaking, zeroing in and locking his eyes with Jack's, searching his face for the answers which had gone unknown for decades. But now, at long last the moment had arrived when all his questions could be answered.

“Why? Was it just so you could cover up your dirty little secret of how bad you screwed up?” Turner asked. You could hear the plea in his voice as he begged for answers as to why he'd been left to endure such suffering. “The three of us put our lives on the line to protect you, and what did we get? Pierce and Garner dead and left behind and me left to be a POW. And what did you get? They rewarded you. YOU! Gave you a medal and a promotion. No, no, no! Don't you get it? You had to pay. I was the only one left and I had to make sure that you did.”

“Captain, what do you mean 'you had to make him pay'? Dr. McKenzie asked still trying to keep his patient focused. He had invested many fruitless hours working with this patients and felt sure it was about to pay off. This was the longest and most attentive the Captain had ever been. He felt sure the breakthrough he'd hoped for was finally about to happen.

“CaptainTurner are you saying you were responsible for MajorCarter's attacks?” Teal'c asked, his deep baritone voice just as emotionless as Turner's but you could see the doubt clearly written on his face. He'd remained silent, but the implications of his meaning were staggering. They'd all been witness to the Captain's many sessions and even with Turner's apparent confession Teal'c could still see no way it could be possible. He could see the look on his friend's face and read the murderous intent there, but he could also see that small amount of doubt that had not been there earlier. He could not be sure which way he would fall as this man continued to try to exact his revenge. He moved a step closer to Jack, fearing the level of rage the answer would let loose in him. After a lifetime of serving the Goa'uld he'd thought he'd seen the worst suffering that could be inflicted on another, but he feared CaptainTurner's revenge had reached a whole new level. He'd thought only the Goa'uld could so heartlessly inflict such a level of suffering on another.

“Major Carter was a worthy opponent...a soldier...strong.” You could see his eyes glazing over again, his short moment of clarity gone as he sank back into himself. Speaking less to them and more as a stream of consciousness to himself, he continued his tale of horrors. “That was the mistake I made in the beginning.” Sam could feel Daniel and Janet move to her side to lend their strength and support as she fought to hold herself together as Turner continued without emotion to describe the nightmare he'd caused in his quest for revenge. Any emotion she showed now would only hurt the Colonel if he felt responsible. She was pulled from her thoughts as she heard Turner continue.

“The others weren't soldiers. They were too weak...not strong like her.”

“Others? What others?” McKenzie asked pleased that he seemed to finally be breaking through.

“The first one broke. She broke too soon...couldn't handle it. But I did get my pound of flesh...I made you suffer O'Neill, even if it was over too soon. You made it hard for a while to get to her...changing her routine...making sure someone was with her all the time. Somehow you knew I was there...knew I was watching you. But I just waited...waited for that one perfect moment when I could get to her. And then I struck. But she was too weak, not like Major Carter. She couldn't take it when I started calling.”

Only Teal'c’s strong grip prevented Jack from reaching Turner as the man continued to detail the extent of his revenge. Jack began to realize that he hadn't been paranoid or overprotective of Sahara. He'd known someone was watching and studying them, but he'd allowed the others to convince him he was wrong. Being 'right' was cold comfort now. He'd failed her, but even worst, he'd been the cause of all her pain and suffering in the first place.

“But I learned...I learned. Had to be less direct...play with their minds a little. Phone calls, breaking in...taking things...moving things. Always when you were away on a mission...when she was alone. Making her think she was losing her mind. Letting her know I was watching her...could get to her anytime. That she was never safe. A note on her pillow...a phone call as she read it. The fear and the threats...it could have gone on for years if it hadn't been for Charlie's accident.”

“Oh, God, no…not Sara too! Oh my God! No! Why didn’t she ever say anything? Why didn’t she tell me? And then Charlie… Oh God!” Jack's gut-wrenching sorrow unmistakable.

Jack was lost in his own nightmare as Turner continued to reveal all he'd done in the name of revenge. The others moved to close ranks around him, subconsciously taking up defense positions. Sam stood with Daniel and Janet on his right while General Hammond stood to his left and slightly behind him, leaving Teal'c in front and to the left of him, to protect and shield him from the threat they all sensed from Turner. The room had gone quiet except for Turner's whispering as he confessed all he'd done in the name of vengeance...and the list was staggering.

In the silence Janet's was the only voice of reason. Her brow deeply creased in concentration, she knew there was something she'd been missing. “You said it took the doctors over three years.” Everyone's attention was focused on her. “But I was there. That would've been over a year after Sahara died. And the Colonel wasn't even in the States then.”

She was the only person in the room who knew Jack's past that well. His eyes locked with hers as he realized she was correct. He'd been so caught up in his rage he hadn't caught it. But his mind still didn't want to give up. Turner had known things...he'd been right about so much. Janet could see the struggle in his eyes.

He'd had been so sure. Everything had seemed so clear back in the Briefing Room. The story Turner had woven, so much like the one in his head. But Janet was right. And if that part of his story wasn't true...oh, he had no doubt Turner had been following him over the years. How else would he know some of the things he knew? He could even remember times when he'd felt he was being watched but nothing had ever come of it. Now he knew. It would be so nice if they could assign blame for this entire nightmare to one evil villain and bring an end to everyone's pain and suffering but life rarely worked out so nice and neatly. He would not find answers here today, only the broken shell of a man consumed by his rage and revenge.

There was nothing more they could do. They'd hoped to find answers in this room today, but they weren't to be found. Certainly not from this man. Exhausted from the day’s struggles and disappointed at their lack of results, the others slowly filed out of the room. There wasn't much to be said. They would rest and tackle the problem a fresh tomorrow.

The others departed, leaving Jack to stare and wonder how he could ever have thought this shell of a man could be the monster they sought. He was so lost in his own thoughts he was momentarily startled when Sam rested her hand lightly on his shoulder. She hadn't wanted to startle him but she couldn't leave him in this condition. She had some idea of what he must have been going through if he believed he was the cause of everything she'd gone through. The guilt he must have felt. But nothing Turner had said was true; it would just take time for that knowledge to sink in. She would be there by his side until it did. None of what had happened to her was his fault. She would make sure he knew it.

“Let's go, Sir. We won't find any answers here.”

He knew she was right. They wouldn't find those answers here. Looking at the man who only minutes before he'd felt so sure was the one they sought, all he felt now was pity. He understood, better than most, the toll being a POW could take on a man's soul; after all, he'd felt the same way about Cromwell for years. If you didn't move past it, it would destroy you. What he was seeing now was a destroyed man. Turner didn't seem to be aware anyone was in the room with him as he continued to stare out into space with the same glazed look on his face.

Jack knew there was nothing he could do for Turner. As much as he felt the guilt for all he'd been made to suffer, he knew it had been out of his hands from the beginning. If blaming him for a mission gone bad made it easier for Turner, then so be it. He could live with the part he'd played in that disastrous mission. Mistakes were made and everyone had suffered because of it. But Turner didn't want to hear or remember the truth. Instead, he'd focused on the only other survivor and laid all the blame at his feet. He'd allowed his hatred to consume his life until there was nothing left.

Moving toward the door he allowed his hand to lightly caress Sam's back before coming to rest at her waist, guiding her from the room and away from the nightmare it stirred. Jack could feel the tremble start through her body even before his mind had time to recognize the sound it was hearing. Her body froze after only one more step.

Sam could feel all the blood drain from her face...she was finding it hard to breathe as the tinny voice they would never have identified as Joe's rang out. That same voice she heard every time she closed her eyes. It taunted her over and over in her nightmares and here it was again...only this time it was real. As unbelievable as it was given his physical condition, there could be no doubt that it was the same voice saying the same thing.

'They tell you no one ever gets left behind, but it's a lie. They leave people behind all the time.'

Stunned, unable to believe in her mind what her body had already accepted, she turned slowly, seeing for the first time the man from her nightmares. Even though she continued to deny the truth, her analytical mind was hard at work trying to reconcile her memory of him and the reality sitting before her. That voice, which had sounded as though it were coming through a bad speaker, was his real voice filtered through the voice box he'd been fitted with after his captors severed his vocal cords to silence him. His many skin grafts and burn marks had caused her drugged mind to believe his face was melting and sliding off. And there were so many other things that she could finally see in him that she'd missed all those other times. Turner was the man...had been the man. Everything he'd confessed earlier had been true...outrageous and unbelievable...but true nevertheless.

“NO! It can't be. I'd have known if it was you. It's not possible...” Her body began to shake and tremble as tears streaked down her face and she fought to draw breath. The realization that she was now face to face with her worst nightmare and that this man, who only seconds ago had been nothing but a battered and broken shell had, with those few words, transformed into her worst fear.

Sam was so lost in her own turmoil it didn't register that Jack had lunged past her and grabbed Joe, who'd been advancing on them as he spoke. Jack's rage finally reached her. The more Turner taunted Jack with all the things he'd revealed earlier, the more out of control Jack became. Not even attempting to defend himself, Joe's voice rose, begging and pleading with Jack to end his pain and suffering. Chanting over and over words that still sounded to her like gibberish, but words she was sure she'd heard the Colonel mumble.

It was a losing battle trying to pull the Colonel off Turner; he was so blinded by rage nothing would stop him. Nothing, that is, except Sam's pleas. Still tugging and trying to break the death grip he had on Turner's throat, her control had also reached its limit. Her tears and choked cries finally broke through the red haze that had descended over him. Sam's voice begged and pleaded with the Colonel to stop, even as Turner's begged him to finish him off.

“NO! DON'T YOU GET IT? HE DESERVES TO DIE...TO SUFFER...FOR ALL THE THINGS HE DID. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND? EVERYTHING HE SAID EARLIER WAS THE TRUTH! IT WAS HIM...HE'S THE REASON SHE KILLED HERSELF. EVERYTHING HE DID TO YOU,” Jack screamed, his body shaking in rage at the realization of all the pain and suffering this man had caused all in the name of revenge toward him.

“You're right. I agree with you, Colonel. You're right, he does deserve to suffer...to be punished. But killing him isn't the answer. That's exactly what he wants you to do. Can't you see? He's trying to make you kill him. Don't give him the satisfaction. It would be more of a punishment for him to live, to make him live with everything he's been through...everything he's done. Please Colonel, please.” Sam continued to beg and plead, trying to get him to see past the rage Turner continued to fuel.

“Don't listen to her.” Turner screamed in the voice they had become accustomed to hearing. “You're right, I am the reason she took her own life. I'm the one who did all those things to her and your Major. I deserve to die. I tortured and raped them. You have to make me pay for that. Don't listen to her,” Turner continued, taunting and begging Jack to end it once and for all, chanting his gibberish over and over.

Finally able to see past the haze of rage that had clouded his mind, Jack could see that Sam was right; Turner wanted to be killed. He was trying to send him so out of control that he'd kill him. He wanted Turner to pay, but he'd be damned if he'd give him what he wanted. Sam was right, it would be more of a punishment for him to live.

Releasing his choke hold on Turner's neck, Jack got up, dusting himself off, his rage and anger still there but now channeled toward a different goal. Then Turner's voice rose. He was chanting louder and louder, repeating the gibberish almost like a prayer.

“Colonel, what's he saying...what does it mean?” Sam asked, unable to understand what was being said but sure the Colonel could.

“That's where you're wrong!” Jack screamed back at him. You forfeited your right. I won't give you the satisfaction of a quick death. I want you to suffer...suffer everyday for what you've done.” Jack's voice was little more than a growl as he turned his back on the man who'd been responsible for so much of his pain and suffering for the last thirty years. The man who'd targeted everyone he'd ever cared for...making them suffer for his failure on that day so long ago.

“No, no, no. You have to. It's my right!” Joe screamed, his voice becoming more and more hysterical. You could hear the desperation. ”You accepted the oath. You have to fulfill your pledge. You have to!” His voice got louder and louder. His rage and desperation seemed to give him a speed and agility that should have been impossible in his physical condition. He charged toward them as the others returned, drawn back by the violence they'd been able to hear from down the hall. Turner grabbed Sam's throat in a death grip, and Sam only managed one startled gasp before Turner dropped limply to the floor.

Janet wasn't really sure what she'd seen, one moment Sam had been in danger and the next Turner was on the floor, head at an unnatural angle. Making a quick examination, Janet met the others’ eyes in shock and disbelief as she announced that Turner was dead. All eyes turned to Jack, he'd said he was capable of doing it and now there was no doubt. “His neck's been broken...at the second vertebrae.”

To Be Continued...