If You Want To Play Games, Okay...But I'll Win | By : WW2_Lover Category: G through L > Hogan's Heroes Views: 1043 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I don't own ANY of these characters, ANY part of this series, or make ANY money from Hogan's Heroes. I'm just borrowing them for a little while. Any words with a * in front of them are lines directly from the show. |
Any words with a * in front of them are lines directly from the show.
Führerbunker = Leader’s bunker
Kommandant = Commander
Kommandtur = Commander’s office
Kraut/krauts = American slang, which is a derogatory term for the Germans.
Stalag = Stalag is short for ‘Stammlager’, which is short for ‘Kriegsgefangenen-Mannschaftsstammlager’. It translates to ‘prisoner-of-war camp’
Luftwaffe = The German name for their Air Force
Dummkopf = Idiot
Reichsmarks = The currency of Nazi Germany. (It was discontinued in 1948.)
Wehrmacht = The collective name of the German armed forces from 1935 – 1945
Herr = Mister
SS-Reichsführer = Leader of the Reich SS (Heinrich Himmler’s title)
Reichsmarshall = Marshall of the Reich (Hermann Göring’s title)
Führer = Leader, Adolf Hitler’s title
Was brauchst du von mir? = What do you require from me?
Oui = French for the word ‘yes’
Vive le général! = French for ‘Long live the General!’
Vive l'Amérique! Vive les Alliés! = French for ‘Long live America! Long live the Allies!’
Generalmajor = German rank, which was equivalent to a brigadier general (1 star) in the United States Air Force during World War Two.
Danke = Thank you
Le Colonel = French for ‘The Colonel’
Le Général = French for ‘The General’
Excusez-moi = French for ‘Pardon me’
Boche = French slang, which translates to ‘German’ & is a derogatory term.
Fräulein = Woman
Ja =Yes
Non = French for the word ‘no’
Russkie = American slang, which means ‘Russian’ & can be a derogatory term.
Nein = No
Outside, near the gates of Stalag 13…
Colonel Hogan never thought he’d live to see the day that World War Two ended. When you ran an underground spy ring out of a German prisoner-of-war camp, it tended to give you a bleak outlook regarding your survival chances. Still, the war was finally over…and not a moment too soon for him! The date was May 20th of 1945, and the American troops had liberated Stalag 13.
He smiled as he recalled the events leading up to today. On May 2nd, the news of Germany’s surrender had reached Hogan and his team. Since they had a direct connection to London, they knew about it before anyone else. However, the rest of the camp didn’t learn of it until a visibly shaken messenger delivered the daily newspaper. The poor guy was so upset, he was lucky he had remembered how to drive his motorcycle! Hogan didn’t think he was so much worried about Hitler’s death as he was about the fact that Germany had lost a world war…for the second time in a row.
Adolf Hitler was dead by his own hand. Apparently, he’d committed suicide in the Führerbunker via a gunshot to the head. Hogan couldn’t say that he was unhappy about that, but the same could not be said for the Kommandant and his guards. There were a variety of reactions to the news. Sergeant Schultz had been happy, of all things! Not overly surprising, since Hogan knew the man was anti-war to begin with. He had showed his second-in-command Corporal Langenscheidt the paper and ordered him to tell all the other guards. At that point, the fat sergeant had decided maybe he’d better tell his boss, – the Iron Eagle himself – what was going on! The American colonel had followed him to the Kommandtur with the belief that Schultz would require his assistance in informing Klink of the situation. Not surprisingly, that belief had turned out to be correct.
Colonel Klink had at first been angry, demanding to know why Schultz had burst into his office without knocking. When Schultz began stammering at the German officer’s anger and trying to explain, Hogan had sighed and handed Klink the newspaper himself. Klink had gone whiter than white and stood up, saying nothing to either of them…except that he expected no disturbances for a little while. “Including you, Colonel Hogan!” he’d snapped. Then Klink had rose and left for his quarters. For his part, Hogan figured Klink just needed time to process everything and had honored his wishes to be left alone. And the guards? They seemed to be mixed pretty evenly between being relieved that there would be no more bloodshed and being terrified of what was yet to come.
And even though everyone here was well aware of the war’s end and the outcome of it, his spankings in Klink’s quarters continued at the end of each day…as they had done continuously since the new policy had been instated. Klink had switched the time of these spankings from 2200 hours to 1900 hours, reasoning that both he and Hogan needed more sleep now than they had needed before due to the extra stress of upcoming events. The spankings were mere reminders...enough to make his rear end sore, but not enough for the soreness to last for more than an hour or two. They generally didn't make him cry either.
Although just for a change of pace, sometimes Hogan had openly requested - not antagonized Klink in order to provoke it – for the older man spank him past his limits, which satisfied the emotional release he enjoyed so much. Klink thought he was extremely strange for asking such a thing, but after three years of a not-quite friendship, that was nothing new to either of them. Thankfully, he always complied with Hogan's request whenever he made it, which made the senior POW officer happy. And the German officer had also pointed out that said spankings would help Hogan sleep better as well. Despite all the talks they’d had previously, Klink seemed to be depressed and moodier than normal about the future.
Even so, Hogan had to admire Klink's moral principles and dedication to his self-appointed task, even despite the risk that Hogan might have him shot…either in retaliation for everything or just out of spite. "If something is worth doing, it is worth the effort to do it right the first time," Klink had once said. Indeed, the American officer had found that his sleep quality increased greatly each night after each of the reminder spankings Klink gave him.
This special time each night was also a good time for them to talk and vent to one another about various subjects, which resulted in Hogan actually leaving Klink alone in his office during the day. The older man had actually gotten more work done as a result, which – according to Klink – had pleased the remaining brass in Berlin immensely. There were a few exceptions, but for the most part they did all their talking in the evening.
The American colonel had been true to his word and made sure he was on his best behavior constantly. Even his team had kept themselves out of trouble, since London hadn’t given them any new missions lately. Hogan was very glad of this, as he had figured things would go sideways at some point like they usually did. That being said, any opportunity to avoid extra punishment was one he accepted gratefully. Having experienced a double spanking under the wings of the Iron Eagle twice before, he wasn’t eager for a third repeat of it!
The days after that had passed rather uneventfully. All of the other former POWs were excited and making plans to leave Germany. Some talked about going to a pub or a brothel first, both of which were normal and to be expected after years at Stalag 13. But that had been almost a month ago. Now General Patton himself was here, his tank parked just outsides the gates of Stalag 13. Currently, he was talking to the other American officer near those same gates. Since Hogan had expected General Barton or someone else who’d been here fairly recently to arrive, seeing Patton himself was a bit of a shock.
He could see Klink nearby, not within earshot but pacing nervously and giving them concerned glances. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that the two Americans were discussing him and his camp. No doubt he wondered what Hogan would say…or if the younger colonel would order him shot as revenge for both being the warden of the former prisoners and his own unique brand of ‘discipline’.
Hogan frowned as he recalled the promise he’d made to himself a long time ago. Has it really been only a year? It feels like a lifetime ago, he thought. He grimaced as he knew what he had to do later on. It wouldn’t be pleasant, that was for sure. Yet a promise was promise, even if it was only to himself. But that would come later. First he had other things to do regarding Klink.
He turned to General Patton and nodded. The general had been asking him lots of questions regarding Stalag 13, his operation, and his treatment here. He’d also asked Hogan his opinions of the camp guards and the Kommandant, wanting to know if Hogan wanted any of them to be hung or shot.
“Because I can make that happen for you, Colonel Hogan. Just point out who needs to be eliminated,” he said, his hand on his gun as he smiled nastily. “Whatever you feel is fair. You’ve racked up quite a few favors from London and the Allied command, and God only knows they owe you a massive debt.” His smile became softer at that point, adding “Or should I say Brigadier General Hogan?”
Hogan let his distaste for the general’s words show on his face. Have them hung or shot? Uh, how about ‘no’? he thought. The guards here had been decent enough to him, especially Sergeant Schultz. The fat sergeant just wanted to re-open his toy factory, and had ‘seen nothing’ more times than Hogan could count. As for Klink, well…he had something quite a bit different in mind.
He looked over at Klink and let the familiar mischief dance in his eyes, making sure Klink saw it before grinning. Then Hogan turned back to Patton. “You’re right about that, General Patton. There’ve been times I – what?” he asked in surprise. “You’re kidding. Are you sure you can do that?” Me, a general? He rather liked his eagles and wasn’t sure how to feel about trading them in for stars.
“Well, I’m sure London won’t give me any trouble on that angle, and President Truman isn’t complaining. This is all actually on his orders anyway. He may or may not be adding more than one star – I don’t know if he’s made up his mind yet – but legally this is all I can do here, General Hogan.”
Patton appeared to be saying Hogan’s new rank on purpose, because the grin gave him away. “So how about it, Hogan? Are there any krauts you want taken out? That Klink fellow of yours over there looks plenty nervous. He got any reason to be? Has he mistreated you in any way?” Patton asked.
Hogan shook his head. “Afraid to disappoint you, but no. Colonel Klink and his guards have all been nothing but decent to us and treated us in a humane way. I’d like you to make sure none of them are charged with war crimes or anything else. I’ve seen what life in other stalags was like and trust me, we were very lucky here.”
He thought for a few minutes before adding, “Actually, when it comes to Sergeant Schultz and Corporal Langenscheidt, I want to make sure they’re treated as war heroes. You can’t miss Schultz, he’s over six feet tall and twice the size of everyone else. Just ask him to point out Langenscheidt, which he’ll be able to do since that’s his second-in-command.” Hogan let a smirk play over his lips. “And I have something else very different in mind for Klink. Something special.”
Patton blinked, unsure he’d heard the new general correctly. “You want to repeat that, Hogan? I’m not sure I heard you correctly.” He looked slightly confused at this announcement. “You want them treated as war heroes? You do know they’re krauts, right?”
“I know they’re Germans, sir. I hadn’t missed the Luftwaffe uniforms on them,” corrected Hogan dryly as he frowned. “There’s no need for name-calling. But Sergeant Schultz and his philosophy of ‘I see nothing! I hear nothing!’ has enabled my men and I to succeed in damaging the war effort of the Third Reich a lot faster than we would have otherwise. And Corporal Langenscheidt seemed to be of the same mind as Sergeant Schultz when he was with us in Paris.” He saw the confused look on Patton’s face and said, “I’ll tell you about it later.”
Patton nodded. “Alright, I’m holding you to that. So, what do you have in mind for him then?” He gestured toward the Kommandant, who saw it and began to pace faster. “This ought to be good, Hogan. Everyone knows you’ve got quite the representation for coming up with off-the-wall schemes that somehow work.” He looked over the other American and waited.
“Oh, you bet I do. I think a promotion to brigadier general sounds more reasonable than being shot. Don’t you, General?” asked Hogan calmly. “Klink might be an idiot at times, but he’s been quite useful to my operation. When I was trying to help him when he was being blackmailed by some of the SS, he caught me in a German uniform dead to rights outside Stalag 13 and didn’t turn me in. No matter what excuse I gave him, he could have had me shot as a spy anyway and been well within his rights to do so. Despite everything, he never said anything about it to General Burkhalter or anyone else. And I can tell you firsthand that getting rid of me would’ve made his life a lot easier, but I’m still alive. That’s got to count for something.”
Hogan took off his crush cap and scratched his head as he added, “He’s also kept our neighborhood Gestapo man off our back and off our trail. He even sent his Sergeant of the Guard, Sergeant Schultz, to warn us of a radio detection truck once when the Gestapo were visiting. Suffice it to say neither of them wanted the Gestapo here anymore than we did.”
Hogan looked around. “Speaking of which, where is Major Hochstetter? I figured he’d have shown up here for sure, if for no other reason than to try and take me out.” He put his hand by his mouth and said in a stage whisper, “I don’t think he likes me very much.” Putting his cap back on, he added, “For that matter, where’s General Burkhalter?”
Patton cracked a grin as he said, “Hogan, you’re absolutely nuts and your request is completely impossible. But…” He trailed off and gave the new general a serious look. “You make the impossible work for you every day, so why can’t I do the same?”
He looked nonchalant, as if promoting an enemy general were an everyday occurrence. “I can make that happen, but not in his military. He’d have to join the US Army Air Force for that to work out. Even I can’t give people in the Luftwaffe promotions, since I’m pretty sure there’s some rule that says you have to be in a military first before you can promote people.”
He shrugged at the questions Hogan asked him. “If you mean the short man dressed in all black with a nasty temper, he’s on his way here. And it’s funny you should mention General Burkhalter, because that’s who he’s riding with. At least according to the American officer riding with them, whose name is Captain Jones.”
Then he gave Hogan a searching look. “Do you make a habit of hosting the general and the major here, or is there something else you want to tell me?”
The new American general gave Patton a wink. “Yeah, Major Hochstetter has quite the temper. Believe me, everyone at Stalag 13 knows when he’s here…and I don’t just mean because they recognize his staff car. You can hear him yelling at Klink no matter where you are in the camp. He’s better than any loudspeaker! But then, all the Gestapo we’ve met tend to be like that.”
Though he had to smile as Patton gave him the news he wanted to hear. “The major is riding with the Burkhalter? Oh, that car ride ought to be entertaining. Those two can’t stand one another.”
Hogan put on his best innocent face as he spoke to Patton. “Not really. Those two are just usually around when something big happens and I figure this counts as something big. That’s it, really.”
Pointing at Klink, he asked, “So you can make that happen if he joins our military, right? Because I probably should go talk to Klink before he tries to give Stalag 13 its first successful escape. Just have London airdrop me the appropriate papers that I ask for. They’ll need to have all the seals, list of departments, etcetera. I’ll give them the information they need to make them.”
He gave Patton a serious look. “The sooner the better if you can arrange it, sir. But hey, I just thought of something…on the off chance he doesn’t want to join us officially, can you make Klink an honorary general in the Army Air Force? I get the feeling wearing a German uniform might cause him some trouble with our boys, but I also don’t want him accused of stolen valor if he wears one of ours either.” After all the trouble I’m going to in order to keep Klink alive, the last thing I need is for one of us to shoot him on accident, Hogan thought.
Patton looked surprised at this request as he nodded. “Yeah, no problem. I’ll let General Walters know to expect a message from you or one of your team.” He raised an eyebrow at Hogan’s next words. “Its first success – oh, never mind. You can tell me later,” he replied. “I’ve got to go, so you’re in charge. If Captain Jones gives you any problems, tell him he can reach me on my tank’s radio.” The two generals faced one other and Hogan offered a salute, with Patton returning it.
“Oh, these are for you, Hogan. You’ll get a ceremony later on of course, and then you can officially retire your eagles. But for now, you can at least wear these.” He handed Hogan six stars and added, “Two for your flight jacket, two for the jacket of your dress uniform, and two for your uniform shirt. Oh, and this is for you too.”
Patton handed Hogan a new crush cap, which looked somewhat similar to his current one. The fabric of the cap was still made of brown leather and had a gold American eagle in the middle of it, but that was where the similarities ended. Unlike the cap he was wearing presently, the upper part of the new cap was stiff. As it was brand new, the wire inside it keeping it pointed hadn’t been removed yet. The brim and visor were black, but the chin strap was gold. Last but not least, there were gold oak leaves decorating both the brim of the cap and the visor.
“Thanks,” said Hogan after taking the cap from Patton and nodding his agreement to the other general’s words. The new general removed his old cap and carefully put it inside his jacket pocket, reminding himself to put it away later on as he placed his new one on his head. The stiff peak felt odd after years in his former one, and he decided to fix that later on. After that was done, he removed his eagles and placed them in the same pocket. Finally, he pinned four of the stars onto the collar of his bomber jacket and shirt collar, pocketing the other two to add to his dress uniform later on.
“Have fun, Hogan. I’ll tell all the guards except for the two you mentioned they can go. Goodbye for now,” said Patton. With that, he spun on his heels and walked away, yelling orders to his men. Hogan watched him go, an amused look on his face as the guards shook hands with the American soldiers. Every last one of them gave Hogan a grateful look and a salute, which he returned, before leaving. Soon the only Germans left in camp were Schultz, Langenscheidt and Klink. The two enlisted Luftwaffe men stood near the gates, quietly engrossed in conversation.
Colonel Klink…oh, this news was going to be fun when Hogan told him it later on. His men knew about Hogan’s plans, since he’d needed Newkirk and LeBeau’s help to make what needed to be made. But obviously they didn’t know about his promotion yet, and Hogan debated if he should just wait and see if they noticed anything different.
In Klink’s case, Hogan felt bad for him. The German colonel had been at his current rank for the last twenty years, so this newest surprise arriving with Burkhalter ought to be good. He wasn’t sure how the former Kommandant would take it, but he just hoped that Klink wouldn’t faint on him…or have a heart attack at the news. He turned and walked towards Klink, seemingly unconcerned about anything in particular.
“Kommandant Klink! Can I see you for a minute?” Hogan called out as he walked towards the older man.
Klink was still pacing and looked extremely nervous. Was it mean to tease him at a time like this? The poor guy looked like he was expecting to be shot at any minute. It’s not exactly the nicest thing to do, his inner voice said. On the other hand, you can’t argue that it’s fun to do anyway! He couldn’t argue with that logic, so he didn’t bother trying.
“Colonel Hogan,” Klink greeted him stiffly with a salute. “What –” Which is as far as he got before Hogan interrupted him.
“Brigadier General Hogan,” the American corrected him cheerfully as he returned the salute. “I got a promotion from General Patton just now. See?” He motioned to the shiny new silver stars on his bomber jacket and uniform shirt, as well as his new crush cap. “He said I’ll get a ceremony and all that later, but he wanted me to have my new badge of rank and cover now.”
Klink gave him a tight smile. “Of course you did. I manage to stay a colonel for twenty years, and you get a field promotion…all the while being a prisoner of war in my camp! Though I cannot say I am surprised at you rubbing it my face.” He looked sad all of a sudden. “So, what did your general want? No doubt giving you instructions on how to torture me before killing me,” he said gloomily.
“What are you talking about, Colonel Klink?” asked Hogan. “We’re not the Gestapo, and we don’t make a habit of randomly killing people. And we certainly don’t torture them.”
The American still looked way too innocent to be believed, which told Klink knew something was up. If there was one thing Hogan wasn’t, it was innocent…especially if there were any monkeyshines afoot! The sly colonel – general now, he corrected himself bitterly – could be counted on to be in the thick of anything going on. You could set your watch by that fact, if nothing else.
Looking very tired, Klink replied, “Col…General Hogan, I am tried, and I do not wish to play games with you anymore. I have known you three years too many and contrary to popular belief, I am not a dummkopf. Just tell me what General Patton asked about me and what you told him in return.”
The new title left a bitter taste on his tongue. Hogan opened his mouth to say something, but Klink wasn’t finished. “I could not hear you two talking, since I thought it unwise to approach an armed American general given how the war turned out. But I could see him looking at me and gesturing, and I could see you doing the same. It does not take a genius to put two and two together, Hogan. So no more games, please. Jell me whatever cruel fate you have planned for me and let us get on with it,” he finished.
Hogan cocked his head as he listened to the tall German speak. He could see where Klink was coming from and didn’t fault him for that conclusion, even if it was wrong. Still, he was highly offended that the other officer clearly thought so little of him. He would never just throw Klink to the mercy of the Allies! Unwilling or not, the older man had been a huge help to him and the Unsung Heroes’ operation. Maybe he’s just resigned to his fate, his inner voice said. Look, can you blame him? You’d feel the same way if Hitler had won. Logical or not, he was still somewhat miffed about Klink’s perception of him.
Drawing himself up to his full height – something he rarely did, as he preferred to slouch somewhat – Hogan was surprised to find that the two of them were the same height as he gave Klink a glare. “Colonel Klink, just what sort of guy do you think I am?” he demanded irritably. “I don’t know what your brass would have done in my place, but that’s not how I operate. I happen to enjoy having to gotten to know you, even if the circumstances weren’t exactly ideal. We’ve had this talk before, if you recall.”
Klink looked taken aback at this announcement, but he didn’t interrupt as Hogan continued. “If you must know, nobody’s going to kill you. You’re not even going to prison.” He smiled evilly as he put his hands in his jacket pockets. “I had a much better idea as to what the Allies should do with you.”
Klink wasn’t quite sure why Hogan’s declaration surprised him, but it did. He would have bet good Reichsmarks that Hogan hated him. Even despite the talk they’d had long ago, the German officer still didn’t quite believe it. The American had enjoyed getting to know him? That was news to Klink, as he couldn’t see how that could be the case.
He couldn’t understand why Hogan would even bother with this pretense anymore, for that’s surely what this was! Just one more game Hogan is playing with me, he thought sadly. Klink didn’t have many friends to begin with, and the few that he did have – had – had been killed. It was a lonely existence, to say the least.
Though he was pleased to know that he wouldn’t be killed or sent to prison, Klink wanted to know just how Hogan had managed that! Deciding he should probably ask before the opportunity was lost, he inquired, “Hogan, I have heard stories from my comrades-in-arms about the Allied forces, and I know they hate us. Therefore, I find what you are saying rather difficult to believe.” He looked around at the mostly empty camp before lowering his voice and hissing, “What did you do?! And don’t lie to me…please,” he added as an afterthought.
Hogan shrugged causally. “Would you relax? If I wanted you dead or harmed in any way, I’ve had plenty of time to make it happen. I didn’t want you dead, and I never have.” He gave the Kommandant a smile. “Besides, I – oh, finally!” he exclaimed, looking over Klink’s shoulder. “The roly-poly and Grumpy the dwarf, right on time.”
What kind of cryptic statement was that? Klink wondered. “I’ve had plenty of time to make it happen.” Deciding not to focus on that right now, he started to ask the newly minted General something else when Hogan made his announcement and looked over his shoulder. “Hogan, who are the roly-poly and Grumpy the dwarf?’ he asked, confused. “What are you – oh no,” he groaned as he turned around and got his answer. The familiar six axle grey staff car with Wehrmacht markings was rolling through the gates, carrying General Burkhalter and a familiar menace in black who looked extremely unhappy.
“What are they doing here?” he whispered in shock as it came to a stop. “What have you done?!” General Burkhalter he could maybe understand, since he was Klink’s direct superior. But he knew the American despised Major Hochstetter more than he did, and with good reason. Whenever he visited Stalag 13, the foul-tempered man spent half of his time threatening him and the other half accusing Hogan of being Papa Bear…the notorious leader of the Underground.
Klink knew there was no way that was true, because Hogan would have to escape to do any of that. And who in their right mind would escape from a prisoner of war camp only to come back…multiple times? he wondered. Hogan often said that the Gestapo major needed a hobby, and Klink secretly agreed with him!
“Colonel Klink, I’ve got this handled. Calm down,” was all the American had time to say as General Burkhalter, Major Hochstetter and who he presumed must be Captain Jones got out of the staff car. The young captain saluted Hogan and said simply, “Colonel Hogan, here are the German officers I was sent to bring back….as you requested, sir.” He took a closer look as the sun sparkled on the shiny metal, saw the stars instead of the eagles on Hogan’s bomber jacket and saluted again. “General Hogan, my mistake. I didn’t see the stars on your jacket before. Sorry about that, sir.”
“No worries…Captain Jones, right?” asked Hogan lightly, looking at the badges of rank the young man wore. When the young man nodded, he smiled. “You didn’t know, since you were told I was a colonel, and you had no reason to. Heck, the rank is so new I’m still getting used to it. Don’t worry about it.” He motioned to Burkhalter and Hochstetter, whose mouths had dropped open in shock. “Leave them with me, Captain. I’ve got it covered.” Jones nodded, saluted once more and left after Hogan returned it.
Burkhalter was the first to recover his wits. “You are a general now? My congratulations, General Hogan.” He offered Hogan a salute, which the American returned. “You managed to get a promotion after being a prisoner of war for three years…that is impressive indeed. Some of my staff cannot even manage to get one after two decades!” He glared the now trembling Colonel Klink. “KLINK! Are you just going to stand there and gawk, or are you going to greet me?”
Klink had been momentarily taken in by this turn of events and the apparent ease that his senior prisoner of war officer and his commanding officer spoke to each other. Just what is going on here? he wondered. But at Burkhalter’s sharp words, he managed to shake himself out of it. Snapping to attention, he clicked his boot heels together and saluted the fat Austrian.
“Of, course, of course! My apologies, Herr General. And you too of course, Herr Major.” Klink saluted Hochstetter, who returned it silently for a change. The Gestapo major looked like he would so rather be anywhere but at Stalag 13 at the moment. “I was just –”
“– standing there like an idiot? I noticed,” the general deadpanned. “Do you mind terribly if we take this inside your quarters, Klink? It is cold and I would rather get comfortable. This is sure to be a long and interesting discussion.”
“Of course, Herr General!” replied Klink. He looked over at Hochstetter, who was still silent but now visibly fuming. “Lead the way, Major Hochstetter,” he added, not wanting the irate Gestapo man anywhere near him when he finally started yelling. With Hochstetter, it was never a question of if he would yell, but when. The German colonel preferred not to go deaf any sooner than he had to. Hochstetter nodded silently and stormed off towards Klink’s quarters, still looking rather upset.
“I really despise that man,” remarked Burkhalter. “It was quite an unpleasant car ride, to say the least.”
“I don’t think anyone here likes him very much, General Burkhalter,” remarked Hogan as they walked toward Klink’s quarters. “Did you bring the envelope with you? The one regarding both issues?”
Sighing, Burkhalter replied, “Yes, but with SS-Reichsführer Himmler missing and Reichsmarshall Göring having been arrested, it was quite difficult.” He gave the American a look. “Heinrich might have been difficult to reason with at times, but he was still a dear friend of mine. I wished him no ill will even when worst came to worst. And have you ever requested to speak with a prisoner on the phone when that prisoner is being held in a prisoner of war camp? I daresay that was a new occurrence for the British, to say the least. I am sure they thought I was mad.”
The Austrian patted his coat. “Still, I managed to get his permission and his signature on the appropriate documents anyhow…after a promise of a full, in person explanation at some point. I would have been here sooner, but the mail service is slower than usual these days and I had to wait.” The fat general appeared to think that over for a minute before adding, “On second thought, do not answer my question. Knowing you as I do, Hogan, you probably have done just that.”
Hogan nodded, smirking at Burkhalter’s comment but choosing to ignore it. “Well, you got it. That’s all that matters. Have you seen Göring yet?”
Burkhalter shook his head. “No. Truth be told, I do not even know which camp he is at. I had to call in a favor I was owed, but they made the call for me. And nobody would tell me which camp I was speaking with. Something about ‘possible misplaced loyalties’ or some such thing,” he added with a grimace. “After all I have done for them!”
Well, this was the most cryptic conversation he’d ever heard! Now Klink was thoroughly confused. Since when did Burkhalter and Hogan work together? For that matter, what did Himmler have to do with this, and why did Hogan seem hell-bent on dragging the leader of the SS/Gestapo into his schemes? Klink wasn’t even in the SS…or the Gestapo! Thank God for small favors, he thought. And what would Hogan possibly need Göring’s signature for? What was going on? He had so many questions!
“Herr General, what exactly is going on? What has happened? Why was Reichsmarshall Göring arrested? And what does any of that have to do with me?” the German colonel asked. “For that matter, where is SS-Reichsführer Himmler? And Herr Goebbels?” If nothing else, Dr. Goebbels wasn’t the head of the Ministry of Propaganda for nothing. The short, slender man had a way with words…and his speeches were always interesting to hear, even if Klink didn’t agree with his opinion. Surely he could talk himself out of any mess. Right?
Maybe not, said the logical part of him. Or have you forgotten when Hogan told you how he lied about the Battle of Britain? The problem was Klink hadn’t forgotten it, and he hadn’t forgotten what his unruly troublemaker had said that night either. He’d brushed it off at the time, believing Hogan’s words empty and only meant to make him feel better. Now he wasn’t so sure anymore.
Burkhalter gave him a glare. “You ask too many questions, Klink! Nobody knows where Heinrich is! That is generally what ‘missing’ means, you know,” he remarked dryly. “And you will find out soon enough exactly what is has to do with you,” he said ominously. “Regarding Herr Goebbels, he committed suicide by gunshot a day after the Führer did.”
The general gave Klink a searching look for some reason, but Klink didn’t know why. “As for everything else, it is complicated. But let me try and simplify it for you anyway. Hitler accused Göring of attempting a coup and declared him a traitor. Hitler also had him thrown out of the Nazi Party and had him placed under house arrest for 6 years. He was going to have him executed for high treason, but he decided to settle for merely expelling him from the Party instead. A condition of that house arrest was that Göring was supposed to resign from the Luftwaffe after those six years had passed. However, since Hitler is now dead, that no longer applies. As such, he is still head of the Luftwaffe.”
Burkhalter shook his head. “Do not ask me to explain what was going through his head, because I do not know. After the news broke, Göring fled and was arrested by the British when he tried to cross into Switzerland. They took him to a British POW camp and that is the last I heard from him until our phone call.”
“I know where he is,” said Hogan quietly. “Your friend Himmler, I mean.”
“How could you possibly know that, Hogan?!” demanded Burkhalter angerly. “I am his closest friend, and even I do not know that!”
Hogan shrugged. “I’m a well-connected man, General…what can I say?” He looked Burkhalter in the eye. “He’s in Lunenburg, in England. Or at least his body is…he committed suicide by biting down on a cyanide capsule. I guess when a British officer tried to look in his mouth during his interrogation, he decided he was better off dead than alive.” Looking serious for once, he added, “I’m sorry for your loss. This damned war has claimed enough lives.”
The look that appeared on Burkhalter’s was the same one he would have if someone had slapped him. “I…that is terrible to hear,” he said roughly. “Yet somehow, I believe you.” As the group had now reached Klink’s quarters, he stopped and closed his eyes briefly. He was clearly trying not to show any emotion. Opening them again, he replied softly, “You are correct about that, Hogan. If nothing else, I am thankful it is over.”
Klink nodded solemnly, not trusting himself to speak at the moment. Three of the most powerful men in the Third Reich were dead and the remaining one was being held captive by the British. A sticky end to be sure, and not the way he’d pictured the war ending at all…despite what he’d been told by the younger man. It brought back his earlier fears he’d had while pacing…what would happen to him now?
Hogan had said he wouldn’t be killed or go to prison, but he’d said nothing about any of Klink’s men. What would happen to his Sergeant of the Guard and the rest of the men under his command? And his country was in ruins…where would he go? Were his mother and his brother Wolfgang even still alive? Or his nephews?
Suddenly, Klink felt queasy. Wordlessly, he climbed the stairs and stood next to a still silent but fuming Hochstetter. He opened the door for the two generals and let them enter, followed by Hochstetter. Speaking of the short major, did he know any of this? If he didn’t, Klink wasn’t going to tell him. Let Burkhalter deal with it. I cannot handle this right now. Bringing up the rear, he followed the rest of the men into his quarters and shut the door behind him. He needed to sit down as soon as possible and deal with all of this new information.
Inside Klink’s quarters…
Klink sank down onto a chair and looked at the wall. He knew he should probably ask his questions, but for the life of him he just didn’t know what to say. Perhaps Hogan would be nice and tell him directly, for once. Since the American usually preferred to play games and dance around the subject, it would be a nice change!
After Burkhalter had sat down in the other chair, Hogan sat down on the sofa. Unfortunately, that meant Hochstetter was stuck sitting next to him. That didn’t make him happy, but at least he wasn’t screeching! Yet, his inner voice said. Give him time; he’ll find something to set him off soon enough! Ignoring that unpleasant thought, Hogan cleared his throat and looked at Burkhalter. “So, General Burkhalter…you’re the Kommandant’s commanding officer. Would you like to do the honors?”
Burkhalter looked like he had bit into a lemon. “Not particularly. But I suppose I must.” He looked over at the tall German, who still looked shaken. “Klink, would you mind paying attention to me?” he asked irritably. He wasn’t sure what he had ever done to anyone in a past life that deserved having Klink under his command now, but it must have been something terrible! Klink single-handedly gave him more headaches than any other subordinate officer he had, not to mention that his camp caused the most paperwork.
Klink looked quizzically over at the fat general, still unsure what was going on but willing to at least hear the other man out. Not that he had much choice, really…he was certain that if he tried to leave, he would be stopped somehow. At least he wasn’t sitting next to Major Hochstetter. That was something, at least. Klink really didn’t like the Gestapo on principle, and he despised the short major in particular. Since said short major was still silent and had yet to say a word to anyone, it was a bit worrisome. Usually the other man would have been screaming about something by now! “I am listening, Herr General,” he replied. “Was brauchst du von mir?”
“Speak English, Klink…Hogan does not speak German and to do so with him here is rude,” Burkhalter said sharply. “Besides, this was entirely his idea. I can assure you that I would never do this on my own in a million years.” He gave the German colonel a criticizing glance. “Frankly, I think you are the biggest dummkopf the Luftwaffe has ever seen.” He saw the frown Hogan gave him and sighed. “Nevertheless, General Hogan has managed to convince me otherwise. I do not change my mind easily – especially regarding you – so that alone is an accomplishment. You are very lucky to have him rooting for you, Klink.”
“I’d just like to point out that I actually do speak German, General,” piped up Hogan. “And I’m fluent in it, but there are still some phrases and stuff I don’t understand. So the consideration is appreciated anyway. And my men aren’t as fluent in it as I am…so when they get here later on, English would definitely be preferred.” He waved his hand. “Sorry, just wanted to point that out. Please, continue.”
For his part, Klink was one percent perplexed. Hogan was rooting for him? As in, the Hogan sitting on the sofa…the same one that was his troublemaker? Why? What was his angle? For that matter, why was he calling General Burkhalter? How had he called General Burkhalter? When had they had time to talk about anything, and why were they talking about him? I will ask all of these questions later, he decided.
For now, he nodded his head. “Well, I have found that when General Hogan wants something, he can be very persuasive,” began Klink. “I have quite a bit of personal experience in this matter.” He raised an eyebrow at Hogan as he spoke, wordlessly daring him to deny it. The American just smiled and lifted his hands with the palms facing up and out in a ‘nothing personal’ gesture. “Please continue, Herr General.”
“I was planning on it,” remarked Burkhalter. “As I was saying, your senior prisoner of war officer here had quite a crazy idea. Where he got it from, I do not know. Why he would go to all this trouble for you – his warden – I cannot understand either, even with my knowledge of him and his situation. In any event, you can thank him for what I am about to tell you.” Giving said senior POW officer a look, he asked, “Would you tell your men to come in here please, Hogan?”
“Of course, General,” replied the younger man smoothly. Everyone in the room watched as he rose and walked over to the phone. What is he doing now? wondered Klink. Hogan picked up the phone and did something rather strange. Instead of asking for the operator, he said “Hey, Kinch? It’s time. You guys got everything together?”
He listened for a moment and nodded, a mischievous grin on his face. “Great! You guys are the best team a guy could ask for. Make sure you bring the costumes too – yeah, those ones. We have some introductions to make, and – what? Yeah, we’ll show them later. Just put the extra stuff in the kitchen except for the main two sets.”
Hogan then listened some more before adding, “We’ve got two extra guests…our favorite general and our friendly neighborhood Gestapo. Yeah, the usual one. We can do the tour later. By the way, tell Newkirk and LeBeau I said to keep a civil tongue in their heads…and tell them that’s an order. I don’t need anybody ruining this.” He listened a moment more and replied, “Good. See you guys in a few minutes. We’re all in Klink’s quarters, so come in the back way. See you soon.” He hung up and walked back to the sofa. Sitting down, he said, “They’ll be here soon, sir.”
“Good,” replied Burkhalter cryptically. “I trust this will not take all day.”
“I hope not. I’m sure everyone here has things to do,” replied the American. “Unless Colonel Klink decides to make a speech, things should move along pretty fast.”
Burkhalter groaned and massaged his temples. “I forgot he has a tendency to do that.” He gave Klink a glare. “Klink! You will make no speeches of any kind. Is that understood?!”
Blinking, Klink gave his commanding officer a blank look. What was Burkhalter going on about now? “Perfectly, Herr General.” He paused before asking his next question. “Why would I be making a speech anyway? What do you know that I do not?” Damn Burkhalter and his little games! And damn Hogan for helping him!
“Klink, if I listed everything I know that you do not, I would die of old age before the list was complete,” replied Burkhalter sarcastically. “*Now, shut up and listen.”
“*Yes sir, shutting up and listening,” replied Klink obediently. Now this he was used to hearing from the fat general! He could work with this. Happy to be back in familiar territory, he waited for the next words out of Burkhalter’s mouth to be both scathing and insulting, as they usually were. Yet when his commanding officer said nothing after a minute, Klink had to ask a question. “What am I listening for, exactly?”
As Burkhalter opened his mouth to reply, Klink shrank back into his chair in preparation for a blistering tirade. That was what usually happened when he questioned Burkhalter, after all. And while he was used to it by now, that didn’t mean it was any more pleasant to hear! Thankfully, it never came. He was spared by three loud knocking sounds. Yet they didn’t seem to be coming from the front door. “What is that?” he asked.
“That would be my men, Colonel Klink…and the sound you were listening for,” said Hogan as he stood up. “If you all could look this way, I’d appreciate it.” Everyone in the room watched the American general as he walked toward the kitchen and approached the stove. Before Klink or anyone else in the room could ask why he was over there instead of answering the front door, Hogan yelled, “Come on up!”
All eyes widened as the stove swung to one side and Sergeant Kinchloe appeared. “Hi Colonel,” the radioman said calmly, as if popping up from a tunnel was an everyday occurrence! He obviously hadn’t noticed the stars replacing the eagles on Hogan’s jacket. “Everyone’s here, so if you could step out of the way, sir…”
“Sure, Kinch,” replied Hogan as a grin appeared. He stepped out of the way and added, “Just put everything but the two main sets with you in the kitchen. And keep them folded! We don’t want to give the game away. You guys got here quicker than I expected, so General Burkhalter hasn’t told Klink yet.”
“Roger that, Colonel.” Kinch climbed out of the tunnel and said, “You heard the Colonel guys, let’s go!” He stepped out of the way so the rest of Hogan’s core team could come up and stood next to his commanding officer.
Okay, Klink wasn’t stupid. He’d figured out something funny was going on when Hogan made his mysterious phone call, but to say this was unexpected was an understatement! He felt dizzy as he realized that not only had Hogan been digging at least one tunnel, but that it led to his quarters! As he watched not only Sergeant Kinchloe appear from the tunnel, but Sergeant Carter and Corporals Newkirk and LeBeau as well, he was curious. Why would they spend all their time and effort digging a tunnel to my quarters? Why not an escape tunnel instead?
That didn’t make any sense. It was every prisoner of war’s duty to escape; surely they should have been focused on that instead! Unless they planned to kill me one day and just wanted easy access to me, he thought. But no, that didn’t make any sense either. Hogan had said he didn’t want him dead, and he was in charge of the other prisoners.
And why were two of the four former prisoners who’d just arrived carrying fabric? Klink didn’t like being confused or left out of the loop, and he’d just about had his fill of both today. “HOO-GAAAN! WHAT EXACTLY IS GOING ON HERE?!” he finally yelled out of frustration.
“If you would relax and calm down for a minute, sir, you might find out,” remarked Hogan. “There’s really no need to shout, I promise.”
“Yes Klink…do shut up,” added Burkhalter, looking amused. “Let the gentlemen come in first, and then I will finish what I was saying before.” By now, the former POWs had finished climbing up from the tunnels now and had closed the entrance. After they came over to the living room area, Burkhalter held out a hand, indicating they should stay standing.
Then he rose and motioned for Klink and Hochstetter to do it as well. After everyone was standing, he smiled and said, “First things first. Sergeants Carter and Kinchloe, Corporals Newkirk and LeBeau…I thought you might want to congratulate your commanding officer on his recent success. Congratulations, General Hogan,” he finished, giving the American general a salute first despite it being against normal protocol…normally the lower ranking person saluted first. But this was a happy occasion for Hogan, and the Austrian general had his own reasons for doing what he did.
Klink did the same. Burkhalter gave Major Hochstetter a fierce warning glare, enjoying antagonizing him. The major looked highly insulted about this turn of events but offered a salute reluctantly. The reaction from the former prisoners was immediate. As one, Hogan’s team all snapped to attention and saluted the new American general, who returned all the salutes in a lazy way with a smile. Still, he looked a bit uneasy about being the sudden focus of attention.
“Oui, oui, OUI! Vive le général!” cheered LeBeau. He had a huge grin on his face, and he pumped his fist in the air. “Vive l'Amérique! Vive les Alliés!”
“Always knew you could do it, Guv’nor!” said Newkirk as he shook his commander’s hand. He had a smile on his face, but his green eyes were bright with unshed tears. Letting go, he added, “I told meself I wouldn’t get emotional or nothin’ when this day came…excuse me, sir,” he finished as he turned away and discreetly wiped his eyes, the tears managing to fall as his happiness for Hogan overwhelmed him.
“That’s amazing, boy – I mean, sir!” Carter piped up. He had a goofy smile on his face and was clearly happy for Hogan.
“Congratulations, General,” added Kinch, who was smiling. “You know this promotion was never a question of ‘if’, but ‘when’, right sir?” he inquired.
“Aw, knock it off you guys,” replied Hogan. He stuffed his hands in his pants pockets and had an embarrassed look on his face. “It’s only a brigadier general…and you guys act like I got four stars instead of one. It’s nothing big, really.” The embarrassed look faded to a mischievous one. “Besides, we can talk about it later. There’s other things we need to do first.”
A chorus of “Yes sir, General Hogan!” was heard from the four former prisoners as he motioned for his men to sit down. Anywhere they wanted was fine with him. Hogan then retook his seat next to Major Hochstetter, who looked even more unhappy than he had before – if that was even possible – and had already sat down.
After everyone was sitting again, an irritated Hogan looked at Burkhalter. He wasn’t a fan of unnecessary attention or praise, and the general had simultaneously caused him to experience both…in his eyes, the praise was completely unnecessary. “You’re really blunt when you want to be, aren’t you General Burkhalter?” He raised an eyebrow and added, “Talk about an unexpected way for my men to find out about this,” gesturing to his stars as he spoke. His men were seated on the floor, surrounding him and Klink.
Although even as he noticed this, he noticed not one of them was anywhere near Hochstetter! The Gestapo major had still said nothing, and Hogan wondered what would finally set him off. Maybe he’s still in shock that we won the war, thought Hogan nastily. Either way, the fact that he wasn’t shouting wasn’t something the American was going to complain about. And at least you don’t have to figure out how to tell your men about the promotion now, his snarky inner voice piped up unhelpfully.
Klink was surprised that Burkhalter would bother making the announcement to Hogan’s men. As he dutifully saluted Hogan, he heard the various exclamations of surprise and congratulations. Noting that they all looked genuinely happy for the American general, he felt a pang of jealousy.
None of his men ever looked happy to see him, no matter what the occasion was. The former prisoners just looked happy to be around Hogan in general, even before the news was announced. But why were they holding what appeared to be a pile of dark cloth? After sitting, he waited for Burkhalter to speak. Looking around him, Klink noticed that Hochstetter looked even more cranky, as if he were constipated. Plus, anything that annoys Hochstetter cannot be all that bad, he decided.
A long time coming…
“I thought it best that they get used to addressing you with your new rank, Hogan,” replied the fat general evenly. “And I pride myself on doing the ‘unexpected’ quite well. Now,” he said briskly, drumming his fingers on the arm of the chair impatiently, “to business.” He looked over at Klink.
“Klink, as I stated before, this is not my idea. Nonetheless, I have obtained the necessary papers. My understanding is that General Hogan and Corporal Newkirk handled the rest.” He took a deep breath, looking anything but pleased at all as he did so. “Congratulations, Klink. It has taken you twenty years, but you are now a general in the Luftwaffe. A Generalmajor, to be exact.”
Hogan looked at the blank looks on his mens’ faces. “That’s equivalent to a brigadier general in the US Army Air Force, or a one star general,” he explained, translating the German rank.
Listening to the short exchange, Klink was able to understand why Burkhalter had done what he did. Ranks were important in the military, no matter which one you were in. He could grasp that idea. What he wasn’t grasping was the verbal bomb his commanding officer had just dropped on him. There was no way he’d heard what he thought he’d heard. Too much wishful thinking, Wilhelm, he thought.
Not wanting to look any dumber then he was sure he already appeared to be – but at the same time unwilling to give himself any false hope later on – Klink decided to say what was on his mind. “General Burkhalter,” he said slowly, “I want to assure you, first of all, that I am not hard of hearing or daft in any way. That being said, could you please repeat what you just said. Because I am not sure I heard you correctly. You have to admit, it is rather hard for me to believe,” he finished weakly.
Rolling his eyes, Burkhalter sighed. I really dislike dealing with this man, he thought. Why me? “Klink, it is hard for me to believe…and I am the one who did half of the talking to make it happen! And I am not so sure that you are not daft at times.” Noticing the uncharacteristically hurt look on his subordinate’s face, he repeated himself. “I said, you are now a Generalmajor in the Luftwaffe.” Unable to keep the next sarcastic barb from slipping out, he didn’t bother trying. “And as I said before, it only took you twenty years.”
Klink nodded, looking like somebody had slapped him. He didn’t appreciate the general’s rude remarks about his career advancement – or rather, lack of – over the last twenty years. Yet he was still trying to process this new information. A general? Me? Finally! he thought. But he still had questions, damn it!
While this explained what Hogan and Burkhalter had been discussing when they discussed him, it didn’t explain other things. Things like why Göring was involved in this, or why Hogan would go to all this trouble just for him. And even though it seemed petty, he wondered if he would get a new uniform to go with his new rank.
With those questions on his mind, Klink decided to both show his appreciation with this unexpected promotion and ask the most pressing question on his mind first. “I see. Danke, danke Herr General!,” he said happily as he felt a huge smile appear on his face. “I will not forget this!” He looked over at the American. “Thank you too, Hogan. I will not forget what you have done for me either. This is most…unexpected,” he added.
“But I am most curious as to why Reichsmarshall Göring was directly involved in this? Surely, that is not normal protocol?” he asked. Apparently, Hogan hadn’t been lying when he’d told Klink before that he was a well-connected man!
Burkhalter blew out a deep breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. Klink was an idiot, to be sure, but even he had to admit that the question was a valid one. Normally generals could promote or demote subordinate officers on their own; only special cases needed Göring’s direct approval. And this was a special case. “Because, Klink, seeing as the war is over I am not authorized to promote anyone on my own merit. I can only do that in times when Germany is actively at war. Since we have surrendered, that no longer applies. As such, I needed a higher authority – meaning Hermann – to approve this.”
The Austrian general waved away the former German colonel’s thanks. “Do not mention it. Ever.” His voice held a note of warning in it. “As I stated before, this is all Hogan’s idea…and he did the other half of the talking to make this happen.”
Oh, that reminds me! Klink turned to look at Hogan, who was openly smirking. My brat never ceases to amaze me, he thought affectionately. “You have my deepest gratitude, General Hogan.” It was funny how the American’s new title didn’t leave him feeling bitter anymore now that he was a general too! “But what…I mean, why? Why would you do this for me? It seems like an awful lot of trouble,” he said thoughtfully.
Sighing heavily, Hogan looked him in the eye. “Look, Kommandant, I like you well enough. At the very least, I don’t hate you or have any grudges towards you. Personally, I always thought it was kind of sad you’d never been promoted…you’re an alright guy and that seems like a rare quality in German officers these days. Excluding you of course, General Burkhalter,” he added. “You don’t seem too bad yourself.”
Burkhalter dismissed the statement with a wave of his hand as Hogan continued. “I know it’s a little late, but better late than never, right…General Klink?” His eyes danced with the familiar look of mischief Klink had come to know as he smiled. “But there’s still more. We’re not done yet.” He looked at the resident pickpocket of Stalag 13. “Newkirk, can you hand me what you’re holding, please?”
“Sure thing, Guv’nor,” replied Newkirk. He handed Hogan what appeared to be, to Klink, a bundle of dark blue and white cloth. Hogan nodded his thanks and looked back at the new German general. “I got your measurements from your personnel file, sir, so –”
“Where did you get access to that?” Klink interrupted. He swelled with pride at hearing his new rank, but that was important to know. How had Hogan and his men even known where to find that? After thinking about it for a moment, the answer occurred to him. He glanced over at the Englander, who was smirking. “Never mind, I think I know the answer.” He sighed and said, “You were saying?”
“Right. Anyway, I got your measurements from your file, and Newkirk here made you a new uniform. One for a Luftwaffe general,” he added. “Mind you, it wasn’t easy to get the correct fabric, but then nothing worth doing is ever easy. And General Burkhalter brought the appropriate awards and documents with him.” He handed the uniform to Klink, who looked stunned. “Here, go put it on. I’m lousy at sewing, so if something needs fixing, we need to know before Newkirk leaves.”
“O-okay,” Klink stammered as he took the uniform and stood up. He left the room, his long legs moving quickly. While he was gone, Carter remarked “Well, he seems happy!”
Newkirk just rolled his eyes at that comment. “Carter, wouldn’t you be? Ol’ Klink’s finally done an’ got ‘imself promoted. Can’t see why the Colonel – I mean, General – would bother wit’ it, personally, but then, that’s jus’ me. I think the Guv’nor’s gone ‘round the bend, ‘e has…why else would he do anything for that lot?” he finished.
“Well, yeah. But still, you gotta be happy for him anyway, right?” asked the young sergeant brightly. “Plus, the fact that he’s still alive at all is a good thing.”
“The fact that he is still alive is due solely to le Colonel – excusez-moi, le Général – and his soft spot for the Boche,” muttered LeBeau darkly. “I have never understood Americans, and I don’t plan on starting now.”
Kinch was the only one who seemed to agree with Carter. “Look, the General’s reasons are his own. We don’t have to understand them or agree with them, but we do need to support him…and that means we can’t ruin this for General Klink, okay?”
“Thank you, Kinch, for getting it,” muttered Hogan. “Look, after all is said and done, you guys can go. I still need to settle things here…alone,” he stressed. “I’ve got some last minute things to handle here. You know, officer stuff.” He smiled. “Besides, you guys have your own commissions to go receive in London.”
At the shocked look on his mens’ faces, he smiled. “C’mon, you didn’t honestly think I forgot about any of you guys, did you? I’ve taken care of anything…and no, I’m not telling any of you what I put you in for,” he added as they opened their mouths to say something. “You’ll just have to go there and see for yourself. And London promised they wouldn’t say anything to any of you either,” he said smugly, feeling satisfaction at covering all his bases. “So I suggest as soon as everything is done here that you guys get going.”
Burkhalter had been watching the conversation between the former prisoners with interest. A smile played over his lips as he watched Hogan skillfully handle his men. He had to admit that the American appeared to be a good leader, seeing as how none of his men argued about his decision. Unlike Hogan, his subordinates seemed to question him at every turn. Which reminded him…
“KLINK! ARE YOU GOING TO STAY IN THERE AND ADMIRE YOURSELF ALL DAY, OR ARE YOU GOING TO COME BACK OUT HERE? SOME OF US HAVE OTHER THINGS TO DO TODAY!” yelled Burkhalter in frustration. He sighed and looked at Hogan. “That man spends more time getting ready than any fräulein I have ever known! And he is so vain!”
Hogan had to chuckle at that observation, because he knew the last part to be true. He’d seen the new general admiring himself in a mirror often enough, after all. “Well, I’m not gonna argue with you there, General.” He would have said more on that subject, but that’s when Klink chose to reappear. Hogan looked him up and down, nodding approvingly before looking at the British corporal. “You do great work, Newkirk. I like it.”
“Thank you, sir. But I can’t take all the credit. Me magic ‘ands did mos’ the work. I jus’ told ‘em what to do is all,” replied Newkirk. He glanced over at Klink. “Well sir, ‘ow does it fit you then? All righ’ I s’pose?”
Klink just stared at the Englander with a look of wonder on his face. “Ja, perfectly! I...I am just surprised, that is all. It is not that it took me long to put on the new uniform, but to make sure I was not hallucinating when I looked in the mirror.”
The Luftwaffe general’s uniform didn’t look that much different from Klink’s old one, although of course some things were different. Instead of being a blue-gray, the pants were dark blue and had two thick white stripes running up the sides. Instead of being blue-gray, the uniform jacket was dark blue. The collar insignia looked mostly like the old one, except it only had one eagle instead of three.
In addition, both it and the oak leaf cluster were now silver and against a light gold background instead of gray against a yellow background. The edge of it was trimmed in silver as well. On the shoulders, the insignia had changed from gray braids against a yellow background to silver braids against a light gold background.
Klink’s new sleeve insignia had changed from a silver eagle in flight carrying a swastika to a light gold eagle in flight carrying a swastika with a light gold stripe underneath it. There was no silver background for this insignia, however. The coat hung draped over Klink’s arm, as he hadn’t put it on. Instead of being gray with a wool collar, the coat was dark blue with a white on the inside flaps.
Though he couldn’t see it, Hogan knew Newkirk had put the appropriate shoulder, sleeve and collar insignia on the coat as well in the correct places; the Englishman was nothing if not detailed when he made something. Finally, Klink’s cap’s insignia had changed as well, but not by much. Everything that had been silver before was now gold, including the double braid on the cap.
All in all, a good look for the tall German. Hogan left himself smile as Klink spoke. “No worries, General Klink. But you’ll have plenty of time to admire yourself later. These two gentlemen,” he motioned to Burkhalter and Hochstetter, “don’t have all day. So, if you could just come sit back down, that’d be great.”
He had used Klink’s new title on purpose and watched the older man swell with pride. Had Klink ever actually stood up tall and straight before? If he had, Hogan couldn’t recall seeing it. Not that he’s ever really had a reason to before, his conscious whispered. You’ve done plenty to knock him down!
Hogan rolled his eyes at this not-so-subtle reminder of why he’d made that promise to himself long ago. It was necessary for the war effort, so lay off! he thought to himself. Uh-huh, keep telling yourself that, Rob, it replied snidely. Whatever…he could argue with himself later. Right now, he needed to focus! As Klink sat back down in his chair, Hogan turned to the fat general. “General, you want to do this or should I?”
Another surprise...
“By all means, go ahead and award them, Hogan. My patience is quickly wearing thin,” replied Burkhalter. He handed Hogan a jumble of metal and ribbon, along with a few pieces of paper. “Since you say you speak German, I am going to guess that you read it as well?” The American nodded and so did Burkhalter.
“Good, good. The order goes Second Class, First Class and then the Merit one. The ribbon bar goes with the Second Class award. Save the one with the blue ribbon for last. Oh, and Hogan?” When the former senior POW officer looked at him, he added, “It is customary to read out the name of the award and what it is being given for. Let me know if you wish for help with translating it.”
“Yeah, that’ll be the day pigs fly,” scoffed Newkirk. “General Burkhalter, the day this man,” he pointed at Hogan, “asks anyone for ‘elp is the day the bloomin’ British Empire uses teabags instead of loose-leaf tea!” He glared at his fellow comrades-in-arms. “Don’t look at me like now, you lot all know it’s true. Stubborn as a ruddy goat, the General is. ‘E never asks for ‘elp, even when ‘e needs it.”
Hogan gave the English corporal a false smile. “Newkirk?” he asked sweetly.
“Yeah, Guv’nor?” replied Newkirk with a smirk.
“Shut up. I’m not that stubborn,” retorted Hogan.
From all around him came a chorus of “That’s a lie!” Hogan blinked; had his men all just said that? More importantly, had the two German generals agreed with his men? Hogan knew that Hochstetter hadn’t said anything, because there was no mistaking that gravelly voice and he hadn’t heard it just now.
Come to think of it, he hadn’t heard a peep so far out of the normally irate major, which was starting to concern him. He looked around him curiously. Seeing the look on both Burkhalter and Klink’s faces, he had to conclude that they had. You couldn’t miss the smile on either man’s face. “Well, so much for loyalty,” he grumbled.
“Can I help it if – for once – your men agree with me?” inquired Klink with a smirk. “I have told you countless times before Hogan, you have a mulish streak a mild wide. And apparently, I am not alone in that assessment.”
Deciding to ignore that comment – mostly because he couldn’t deny it – Hogan put the awards in his lap and sorted through them. Then he sifted through the papers until he found the first one he needed. “Moving on with my day,” he said dryly. “I have here four awards for you, Kommandant.”
He read from a piece of paper, his German flawless as he spoke before translating everything into English. “For exceptional service not in direct connection with combat – I’m going to guess that’s regarding his perfect ‘no escape’ record here at Stalag 13, if I’m not mistaken, General Burkhalter?” he asked. The fat general nodded, so Hogan continued on. “Anyway…Wilhelm Klink, you are hereby awarded the War Merit Cross with swords, Second Class.”
He handed Klink a silver cross with swords crossed behind it. It had a black, red & white ribbon to hang it by from the uniform. “It says here that you’re supposed to fasten this through the second buttonhole. So, here’s the paper that goes with it. I’m guessing that it’s supposed to prove that you didn’t steal the award or something.” He also handed Klink a ribbon bar that was black in the middle, with a vertical white stripe on either side and a vertical red stripe on the very ends. “General Burkhalter says this goes with it.”
Then he held up the next award. It looked just like the first one, except it had no ribbon. Instead, it had eight loops on the back. “Okay, this is a weird design,” muttered Hogan as he looked at it. Looking for the next piece of paper and finding it, he looked back at Klink and spoke again. “Again, for exceptional service not in direct connection with combat…Wilhelm Klink, you are hereby awarded the War Merit Cross with swords, First Class.”
He handed Klink the award. “I guess you’re supposed to wear this on the breast pocket of your uniform jacket, but it doesn’t say which one.” Handing Klink the paper, he added, “I’d suggest you put it on the right breast pocket, sir…the other one looks kind of crowded.”
Looking at the third award, Hogan held up a yet another version of the War Merit Cross. This one looked like the War Merit Cross with swords, Second Class, complete with the same color ribbon…except that this ribbon was clearly made to be worn around the neck. Seeing as there were only two pieces of paper left, it wasn’t hard to figure out which one was for the correct award. “Okay, so for – oh, you’ve got to be kidding me,” said Hogan in disbelief as he glanced it Burkhalter. “How many friggin’ awards do you Germans have for the same thing?”
Shrugging, Burkhalter shrugged and smiled faintly. “Klink might be a dummkopf at times, but his perfect ‘no escape’ record made me look very good in Berlin. And it is also the only reason I never sent him to the Russian Front!” he added with a frown. “I thought this seemed appropriate. Besides, the War Merit Cross is a progressive award; you have to earn the Second Class and the First Class awards first. I may be a general, but even I cannot circumvent the rules of the Wehrmacht.”
Hogan considered this and concluded that Burkhalter had a point. “Okay, I guess that’s fair.” He turned back to Klink. “As I started to say before, this award is for exceptional service not in direct connection with combat.” Hogan was successfully able to avoid rolling his eyes, but it was difficult. “Wilhelm Klink, I hereby present you with the Knights Cross of the War Merit Cross with swords.” He handed Klink the award, which the tall German took with trembling hands as he tried to fasten it around his own neck.
But Klink’s slender fingers were shaking so badly, he managed to drop the award in his lap instead. Why are his hands shaking? wondered Hogan. You’d think somebody was going to assault him or something. Geez! Sighing, the American said, “Here, let me help you out with that, Kommandant. Hand me that and lean forward.” Klink obliged and felt the award fastened around his neck. “There you go.” He studied the older man for a moment. “Hey, it looks good!”
Handing the most recent award paper to Klink, Hogan cleared his throat. “Alrighty then…last but not least, we have this.” He held up the last award. It was a gold iron cross dangling from a blue ribbon. “According to this paper, this award is for twenty-five years of service in the Wehrmacht. Wilhelm Klink, I hereby present you with the Wehrmacht Long Service Award, First Class.” He handed Klink the last award and the accompanying paper. “And again, you’re supposed to wear this on the breast pocket of your uniform jacket, but it doesn’t say which one.”
Brushing of his hands, Hogan smiled. “Congratulations again, sir. Would you mind standing up?” He looked around at the rest of the men gathered in the room. “And everyone else as well?” They all stood, thought Carter had to set down the bundle of cloth he was holding first. Hochstetter stood as well under silent protest after another warning glare from Burkhalter.
Snapping to attention, Hogan looked at the once-again confused German officer – thoroughly enjoying the fruits of his labor – and stood at attention. “Gentleman, may I present to you…General Klink!” He offered the older man a real salute for once, not the flippant one he usually gave. As he did so, he gave every man on his team a look that said, ‘I know you don’t like him much, but just do it.’
It was obvious that none of his men were happy about this, but they all copied Hogan dutifully. The fat general saluted Klink also, though it took an actual elbow to the side from Burkhalter before Major Hochstetter got with the program.
Grinning so hard he thought his face might crack, Klink stood at attention himself and returned the salute. “Thank you, General Hogan,” he replied. How nice of Hogan to do this for me. Perhaps I have misjudged him, thought Klink. Something told him that this wasn’t the end of his time with Robert Hogan, and that something was probably his experience with the wily American talking.
On his end, Hochstetter sullenly sat back down as soon as the salute was returned and crossed his arms in silent annoyance. After everyone was sitting again, Hogan looked like he still had something to say. Klink saw it and grew suspicious as he rolled his eyes. I knew it! I knew that this promotion was not all he had up his sleeve! “I am very appreciative of all you have done, Hogan, make no mistake. But just what are you planning now?” he asked warily, not sure he wanted to know.
“Sir, I’m insulted. You think I’m planning something? Why, I’m as pure as the driven snow.” Hogan gave him his most innocent look, which failed when he grinned due to LeBeau saying “That’s the biggest lie I have ever heard you say, Général. And I’ve heard you say much that would be considered a lie.”
Looking bewildered, Carter asked “I thought snow was white?” In an attempt to be helpful, he added, “But soot is black though! Now pure as soot, that I’ll believe sir.”
“Carter…you’re not helping,” replied Hogan in amusement, used to the younger man’s naiveté by now. He looked at the Kommandant. “Alright, you got me. There is something else, actually.” Looking over at his demolitions expert, he asked “Carter, could you hand me the other uniform?” Nodding, the young sergeant replied, “You got it, sir.”
Klink nodded his head, pleased that at least Hogan admitted it. “I knew it. Nothing is ever simple with you, Hogan.” He watched as the blond-haired American sergeant handed Hogan a pile of brown cloth. “What are you doing now, Hogan? What is that?”
“Well Kommandant, this is an American uniform…one of an American brigadier general, to be precise. You wanted to know what I was talking with General Patton about, right?” When the German nodded, Hogan continued. “I wanted to know if he could swing it with President Eisenhower to make you a general in the United States Army Air Force. I –”
“Sir, you’ve got to be kidding me.” All eyes went to Kinch, who looked stunned. “You want to make him a general in our military?” The radioman shook his head. “They’ll never go for it, General. I know the Allied High Command owes you a debt that they can never repay, but this is a bit much! Even for you,” he added as an afterthought.
“Actually, they’ve already agreed,” replied Hogan calmly. “General Patton said it was fine, and he said he’d tell them. I just have to radio them later on and let them know what the decision is. Then London will airdrop us the papers and it’s done.”
LeBeau let loose a rapid-fire string of French nobody could understand, but everyone was sure it was obscenities. Meanwhile, Newkirk looked at Kinch and nodded sagely. “That tears it. I told you lot long ago ‘e’s completely barmy. I say the Guv’nor’s gone ‘round the bend. ‘E has to ‘ave, nobody’ll ever go for that!” Looking at his commanding officer, he said, “Such a shame too, Guv’nor. You lasted this long.”
“Newkirk, I’m not crazy,” replied Hogan wearily. “They owe me – and by extension, you guys – more than they can know. Or have you forgotten the entire 6th SS Panzer division London wanted us to hold up for three days? Us…just five men! They can just deal with my request,” said Hogan angerly.
Turning back to Klink, Hogan said, “Anyway, like I was saying before sir…the offer’s there, if you want it. I don’t think there’s going to be much call for a Luftwaffe general – or any other rank – now that the Third Reich has crumbled, and if nothing else the Russians that still in Germany aren’t going to be overly friendly towards you if you’re dressed like that.”
Klink picked up the brown uniform and looked it over. It wasn’t too bad, but brown wasn’t his color. He should know, since he’d worn an American uniform before when he and Hogan had travelled to London to steal a plane. Not only that, but he felt that joining the United States Army Air Force was definitely considered treason, and Klink was still a man of honor.
“Hogan,” he began quietly, trying not to offend his brat. “That is a most generous offer, and I deeply appreciate it. However, I am afraid I cannot accept it. I am still a loyal German, and to do as you are suggesting would go against my code of honor. I shall stay in the Luftwaffe.” He handed Hogan the American general’s uniform. “Here, you take it. You will need a new uniform for yourself anyway, and we are the same size. A good solution, ja?” he asked with a smile.
But the American shook his head. “That’s true, but you keep it…you’ll need it in the future. And I figured you’d feel that way – not gonna lie – but I had to give you the choice. Besides, I have a back-up plan.” He winked and grinned cheerfully at the older man, who sighed and sank back into his chair.
“You have yet still another plan? Hogan, you are going to give me a heart attack from stress before I can retire in one piece!” Klink swung his lower arm and fist in a quick motion. “Mmmmpf! You are a true troublemaker, do you know that?” Something Hogan had just said decided to sink in as he asked in a confused voice, “Why would I need it in the future?”
“So I’ve heard, sir, so I’ve heard,” Hogan deadpanned, trying not to remember the reason for that particular nickname. Unfortunately, his men were sharp and didn’t miss it. They gave him questioning glances and he shrugged. “The Kommandant here seems to think I enjoy causing trouble. Isn’t that the strangest thing you’ve ever heard? I’d never do such a thing.”
Hogan had to applaud his men’s acting skills, since they instantly looked like butter wouldn’t melt in their mouths. Apparently, they’d watched him more than he thought and were quick studies. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe you want to play dress up?” After seeing the exasperated look on Klink’s face – a sign his patience was wearing thin – he just shook his head and added, “Can’t tell you that yet sir, but I promise you’ll want it later.”
Carter was the first to speak. “You? Cause trouble? That’s the most ridiculous thing I ever heard, boy – I mean, General!” he said hastily.
“General Hogan, a troublemaker? That’s rubbish!” exclaimed Newkirk.
“Non, Le Général is not a troublemaker,” added LeBeau.
“I think he’s got you confused with someone else, General,” Kinch said.
Klink frowned. He could appreciate Hogan’s men backing up his claim of innocence, even if it was utterly ridiculous and the two generals both knew it. Still, that didn’t change the truth. “If all of you truly believe that, you have not been paying attention very well. Stalag 13 is known for the strange things that happen here, and I have good reason to believe that this man,” he pointed at Hogan, “and his monkeyshines are behind it!”
Not bothering to deny this observation – since he would prove in a few minutes that Klink was correct – Hogan pushed on. “In any event, after I let London know your decision, they’ll be airdropping me some papers for you, sir. I just have to look them over and make sure they’re correct before I give them to you.”
Klink’s brow furrowed as he considered this. “Papers? What are you talking about, Hogan?”
Hogan rolled his eyes. “Papers. You know, like identification papers? It’s nothing major, just an official document with the United States of America’s official seal on it. It’ll have my signature and all the departments I’m affiliated with, along with phone numbers.” He stuffed his hands in the jacket pocket of his bomber jacket.
“Basically, it’s a really long note saying you’re a recognized friend of the Allies, you’re not a threat to anyone, etcetera. I’m good, sir, don’t get me wrong. But I can’t go everywhere with you for the rest of your life. And I can’t guarantee that some Russkie isn’t going to take one look at you and shoot first, ask questions later,” Hogan said.
Raising his eyebrows, Hogan added, “That’s also why I want you to keep the American uniform…if you ever visit the United States, our boys might not take too kindly to you wearing a German uniform, especially one of a general. But don’t worry, you’ll also have a paper with all the seals and stuff saying you’re authorized to wear it, it’s an honorary rank in our Army Air Force and so on.”
Burkhalter had been listening to this exchange with a half-smile on his face. He knew Hogan was well-connected with the right people, but just how well-connected he hadn’t known before now! “It seems to me, Klink,” Burkhalter said conversationally, “that General Hogan is very well-connected to the Allied brass. And he appears to have thought of everything.” He nodded to Hogan. “My thanks to you, Hogan, for your thoroughness.”
“Aw, it’s really not a problem, General Burkhalter,” replied Hogan. “We’ve both gone to a lot of trouble here, and I’d really like to keep the General here alive after all this, you know?”
“Indeed. I can understand that, although I am not sure why,” remarked Burkhalter.
Hogan sighed. “At this point, it’s on principle, General.” Looking at Klink again, he spoke. “Like I said, London will airdrop the papers I need to look over…I estimate it’ll be in about three days, maybe less if they put a rush on it. So, I hope you don’t mind hanging out here for that time.”
Klink gave a bitter laugh as his bottled up frustrations and concerns spilled out. “Mind? Of course I do not mind. I have been here for the last three years, so what is three more days? Failing that…let me think. My country is in ruins, I am not sure if my mother, my brother Wolfgang and my nephews are even still alive, and I cannot think of where I will go after I leave here. So no, I most certainly do not mind.”
His normally somewhat deep voice rose in pitch as Klink continued on. “In addition to all those things, I have no idea what will happen to the men under my command. Yes, I saw them all leave except Sergeant Schultz and Corporal Langenscheidt, but that means nothing. They could have been headed to…to…to a spot to be shot, for all I know!”
Klink was breathing hard at the end of this little speech. “This is all very confusing, and I am frustrated beyond belief right now. And I…I am scared, Hogan. I am worried about my men.” It galled him to admit that in front of everybody, but it needed to be said before he lost his nerve. “They are all decent people and they do not deserve to die! They may not like me – and that is fine, I am long since used to that – but that is not an acceptable fate for them! They did nothing wrong except work here as guards, and –”
Hogan held up his hands in a ‘calm down’ gesture as he interrupted Klink. He didn’t need the older man working himself up into a panic attack! “Whoa…take it easy there, sir. Nobody’s going to die. Your men left to catch the train back to their respective homes. They’re not dead, but they’ll probably sleep great tonight in a warm house. As for Sergeant Schultz and Corporal Langenscheidt, they’re going to be hailed as war heroes by the Allies, okay? So just calm down. Do you really think I’d let anything bad happen to them?” Hogan demanded. “Langenscheidt’s an okay guy, and Schultz, well…he’s our strudel king.”
Nodding, the small Frenchman said “Oui, Schultzie is my strudel buddy. Despite his heritage, he loves fine French cooking. Unlike some people,” he added, glaring at Newkirk. “The English are barbarians when it comes to food.”
“Oy, I resent tha’, Louis! Some of us have refined tastes and don’t think snails are a delicacy!” said Newkirk hotly. He folded his arms and added, “Besides, ol’ Schultzie loves any food, not jus’ ‘fine French cooking’.”
Hogan rubbed his temples. “You guys, can you have this discussion later?” He gave the new German general a weary look. “You see? This is the type of thing I have to deal with all the time. And you wanted me to keep everyone out of trouble. Do you see now how impossible that request was?” Rolling his eyes, he added, “This has been an often-argued about subject since LeBeau got here.”
Klink had to concede, as he had before, that perhaps his request had been a tad unreasonable. Still, he would not be swayed. “If you were normal prisoners of war, it would not have been so impossible for you,” he argued. “The very fact you have mentioned London airdropping you anything – like that is a normal occurrence and has happened before – speaks volumes in itself.”
Ignoring that comment, Hogan continued on as if Klink hadn’t spoken. “Well, like I said, they’ll be taken care of. Schultz might be a little dim at times, but’s overall he’s alright. As for your mom and your brother, just give me their last known address and I’ll have it checked into. Okay? Do you feel better now?” he asked, eyeing the German general as if he might go over the edge at any minute.
“Dim, he says,” Klink replied. “Dim is hardly the word I would use to describe Sergeant Schultz. While he might be *a likeable clod, he is still an idiot.” He glanced at the seemingly unconcerned American. “And just how do you propose to do that? Wait, do not tell me.” He smiled, but it wasn’t a friendly one. “You have yet more tunnels. Tunnels you have managed to dig right under my camp!”
Smirking, Hogan replied, “That’s fair. But look, we’ve got Colonel Crittendon on our side. That man messes up everything and anything, even when he’s trying to be helpful.” He stood up and brushed off his pants. “Actually, yeah. Papa Bear needs a den, you know?” He glanced at Hochstetter, who seemed to be at his breaking point.
Deciding to goad Hochstetter into exploding now rather than in the tunnels and risk causing a cave-in, he added, “That’s right, you heard me. I am Papa Bear, Major Hochstetter. Not that you can do anything about it now,” he said smugly. Looking at General Burkhalter, he asked, “So, you guys wanna see our cellar? We’ve been doing some home renovation, and frankly I’m proud of it.”
Major Hochstetter finally loses his cool...
But before anyone could reply, there was a sudden, earsplitting eruption of sound. “BAH! TRAITORS, ALL OF YOU! I WILL HAVE ALL OF YOUR HEADS! ESPECIALLY YOU, KLINK!” Well, it was about time! Hogan had begun to wonder at this point if the Gestapo major would ever say anything again.
Major Hochstetter had finally lost his cool, and he leapt up from the sofa. He began furiously pacing, alternately glaring at everyone in the room. “HEADS WILL ROLL! I WILL HAVE YOU ALL SHOT FOR THIS TREASON! *I WILL SURROUND ZIS CAMP WITH A RING OF STEEL, WITH MY FINEST GESTAPO OFFICERS!” The irritable man was madder than a pissed off hornet, screaming and waving his hands in the air. If he hadn’t been screaming so loudly, Hogan would have egged him on just to watch the show!
“Oww, that was my eardrum,” Hogan complained. “You know, you’re awfully shouty for a guy who’s only a major, Hochstetter. Is there a reason why you’re always yelling at everyone? A lack of personality is no reason to scream all the time. No woman is ever going to want someone who’s perpetually mad constantly.”
Hogan saw grins appear on everyone’s faces, so he pressed on. “Geez, and here I thought Grumpy the dwarf was an insult. Apparently, it’s an accurate nickname.” He gave the irate major a calculating look, wondering how Hochstetter possibly thought he was going to pull off his latest threats. “You’ll surround the camp with your finest Gestapo officers? Really?”
The American officer barked out a bitter laugh. “And just where are you going to find them? This I have to hear, because everyone in the Gestapo and the SS has fled for parts unknown. They’re all afraid of being tried for war crimes and executed by a firing squad. Seeing as both the SS and Gestapo is a considered a criminal organization now and membership in either one is grounds for an automatic death, they’re right to run and hide.”
He shrugged. “Somehow, I don’t think you can surround anything by yourself, Major. And the SS weasel with the glasses is dead too, so who exactly are you going to complain about everything to?” He tossed an apologetic look at Burkhalter for this callous comment, who waved it off.
Hochstetter was still pacing angerly, waving his hands around and generally looking pissed off. “I DO NOT CARE! I WILL FIND SOME ANYWAY, SOME THAT ARE NOT COWARDS! AND THEN I WILL…I WILL…” Abruptly, he trailed off and sank down onto the sofa. His anger seemed to fade as the last words the American had spoken appeared to sink in. “SS-Reichsführer Himmler…is dead?” the major asked weakly.
“No, I do not believe it!” Hochstetter looked at Burkhalter for confirmation of this, since he didn’t trust Hogan as far as he could throw him. “Herr General, is that –” Seeing the stricken look on Burkhalter’s face and the slow nod, he cut himself off. “Oh. I see,” he muttered in a rare show of sadness. “I am…I am sorry for your loss, Herr General.”
Hochstetter paused before continuing, thinking how best to phrase his thoughts. “Herr Reichsführer, he –” He cut himself off as he considered what he was going to say next. “He was a hard man, and a difficult man to work under for sure. Himmler always demanded nothing but the best from those under his command, and he constantly challenged us to exceed our own exceptions. Still, that is life in the Gestapo…and the SS as well, I am sure. He was a good man irregardless, and I will morn his loss.”
He looked at Hogan, who seemed to be a regular fountain of information today. “I am going to assume – by the fact that everyone is just sitting here calmly while discussing this – that the Führer is dead too?” Hogan nodded, and Hochstetter blanched. This day just kept getting better and better, while his looming fate looked bleaker by the minute. “What about Herr Goebbels?” Hogan shook his head and made a slicing motion across his throat.
Grimacing and processing that information, Hochstetter really didn’t want to know what he asked next. Unfortunately, he had to know for his own piece of mind. “What of Reichsmarshall Göring…does he still live?” the short man inquired. It was no secret that he personally thought little of the Luftwaffe, but his need for information overrode his dislike. And he needed to know if Göring needed any type of help, should he still be alive.
Not that he was quite sure how he could do anything right now if Göring did, but he would try his best! They could still snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. It was possible to do, since people had done it before. The history books told as much, if one read between the lines.
At Hogan’s nod, he relaxed. That was good news, and it meant he had a chance to help rebuild Germany the right way. He would find Göring and then they would pick up where Hitler had left off. He, Wolfgang Hochstetter, would be a name to feared all across the world when they were done! The Gestapo and the Luftwaffe would mend their fences and do things right this time around. And he would lead both the Gestapo and the SS in Himmler’s stead. His day was looking up!
But his thoughts of reclaiming glory were somewhat squashed when the American general added, “But he’s in British custody.” British custody? Those are less than ideal circumstances, Hochstetter thought. Still, it is doable. I just have to find him, which means I need to wait for my opportunity to get away from Burkhalter. I will watch and observe, then escape when the time is right. The Gestapo man had a plan, which he considered a good thing…some plan was better than no plan. “How did they die? Or do you know?” he asked Hogan, not really expecting the American to know.
But to his absolute surprise, he got an answer. “To my knowledge, Hitler shot himself in the head with a pistol at the same time he bit down on a cyanide capsule, Goebbels shot himself in the head the very next day, and Himmler bit down on a hidden cyanide capsule when the British officer interrogating him tried to look in his mouth,” replied Hogan simply. “Face it…the Third Reich is finished. For better or worse, the war is over.”
Hochstetter sank back into the sofa, obviously thrown for a loop by all the bad news he’d just gotten. “Of course. Well, why not?” He threw up his hands in frustration, angry that the regime he’d supported so fanatically had fallen. In his eyes, Hitler had failed the German people. “I have gotten nothing but bad news today. At least I served my country faithfully.”
He decided to leave out that he had also gotten what he considered good news as he pointed an accusing finger at Hogan. “And I knew you were Papa Bear! I knew it!” Hochstetter exclaimed as he looked at Klink. “Klink, did I not tell you numerous times that zis man was Papa Bear? I was right!” he finished triumphantly.
“Yeah, you were, Major.” Hogan gave him a look that could almost be considered pity, but not quite. “If you promise not to start shouting again and cause a massive cave-in, my men and I will give you guys the grand tour downstairs.” He stood up again, adding, “I need to radio London anyway so they can make those papers and send them over.”
Hochstetter nodded, still feeling both numb and frustrated. Yet he really wanted to see for himself the proof of his accusations, as well as prove it to the idiot otherwise known as Wilhelm Klink! “Ja, that I can promise. I do not like dirt much, so that would be bad. Lead the way,” he said, standing up and stretching.
The other men stood as well and made their way to the stove, which Hogan moved out of the way to reveal the hole. Hogan’s men climbed down first, followed by Burkhalter, Klink, Hochstetter and finally Hogan. The younger man didn’t trust Hochstetter to go first, and he sure as hell didn’t trust him to go last!
A/N: What I wrote regarding the events with Göring, Himmler and Goebbels are mostly true. I had to change some things for my story to work, but it’s about 90% accurate. I just adjusted dates a little. I based Klink’s general insignia and uniform colors off of General Biedenbender from the show (the one that shot Hogan down.)
The crush cap description was from seeing a picture of the type of cap General Douglas MacArthur wore on Google. I just changed it from a tan fabric to a brown leather, like the one Hogan is shown to wear in the show.
I consulted Wikipedia, and during WW2 the rank of Brigadegeneral (what is considered equivalent to a Brigadier General, or a 1 star general today) didn’t exist. It wasn’t until the Bundeswehr (armed forces) was formed in 1955 that a Generalmajor became equal to a Major General (a 2 star general) like it is today.
Also, I again consulted Wikipedia for these awards, and what I wrote is correct. The War Merit Cross was awarded in classes, so for Klink to be eligible to receive the Knights Cross of the War Merit Cross, he had to first receive the War Merit Cross, Second Class and the War Merit Cross, First Class. As for the Wehrmacht Long Service, it included a person’s time in the military from WW1 as well as WW2. It’s thought that Klink joined the military in 1914 when WW1 started; therefore he would have been in the military for 31 years by 1945 and eligible for this award.
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