Dylan's Hunt is On!

BY : silken
Category: 1 through F > Andromeda
Dragon prints: 1947
Disclaimer: I do not own Andromeda, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Title: Dylan's Hunt is On!
Author: three eyes open / aka "silken"
Spoilers: Nope.
Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended; just me and my muse getting our kicks.
Notes: This piece, like "Taking a Break" was inspired by my friend Mark at a Drom message board.





Dylan: My hand is actually cramping! I canít stand this anymore!

Andromeda: Canít stand what?

Dylan: Oh, nothing, nothing. Um, whereís Harper?

Andromeda: On the Maru.

*****

Harper: Hey, boss, whatcha want?

Dylan: You.

Harper: Excuse me?!

Dylan: I want you. Now.

Harper: You donít meanÖ.

Dylan: Come here you cute lil bastard...I wanna pinch those cute little dimpled cheeks!

Harper: I want my Rommie!

Dylan: I want hugs and kisses! Bad!

Harper: Come a little closer.

Dylan: Yeah! Do you like spanki-OUCH!!

Harper: Whew! Thank God I hid this little stun gun under my pillow! But I need to hide, heíll wake up soon.

*****

Trance: This happened in the future I was in too, so I was prepared. See ya.

*****

Harper: Beka, you gotta help me!

Beka: What did you do now, Harper?

Harper: Itís Dylan! He wants me to be his sex toy!

Beka: What?! Harper!!

Harper: Iím not kidding, Beka! Heís after my ass and then heíll-

Beka: I get the picture. Come on, Iíll hide you in my cabin.

Harper: Oh, thank you, Beka. You have no idea how scared I was. He really meant itÖ

Beka: Itís ok, Harper, Iíll protect you. Here we are.

Harper: I canít believe this is happening. I mean, I saw how he looked at me sometimes but I never thou- what are those restraints for, Beka?

*****

Dylan: Andromeda, whereís Harper now?

Andromeda: In Bekaís cabin.

*****

Dylan: Hmmm, I wonder if these bots could be alteredÖ.

*****

Beka: Come in, Dylan.

Harper: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! You canít do this, Beka! Youíre my best friend!

Dylan: Why are you doing this, Beka?

Beka: I want to watch.

Harper: You backstabbing pervert!!

Beka: So Iím a perv, big deal.

Dylan: This will be much easier if you cooperate, Harper. I wonít hurt you.

Harper: NO WAY!! Absofreakinlutely no way!

Beka: I wouldnít be bothering to come up with strange words right now if I were you.

Harper: Andromeda, activate Harper defense Hendrix 1 A Gamma Niner.

Andromeda: Hendrix 1 A Gamma Niner, aye.

Beka: OHMYGOD!!! What is that horrible noise?!

Andromeda: A rendition of the United States of Americaís national anthem by a musician named Jimi Hendrix at maximum volume.

Dylan: TURN IT OFF!! TURN IT OFF!!

Andromeda: I believe the correct phrase is ďturn on, tune in and drop outĒ.

*****

Beka: Thank God thatís over! Andromeda, where is Harper now?

Andromeda: He has disabled my internal sensors.

Dylan: Beka, you know, you do have beautiful eyes. And a really nice pair of, well-

Beka: Oh, shit.

Dylan: Itís ok, Beka, I wonít hur-OW!

Beka: Now Iíd better hide.

*****

Dylan: Iím sure these bots could be alteredÖ..

*****

Harper: Tyr!! Please, please donít tell Dylan you saw me!

Tyr: What have you done now, Harper?

Harper: Dylan is after my ass! He wants to screw me! As in anal sex!

Tyr: He wants you?

Harper: Whatís that supposed to mean?!

*****

Dylan: Rommie! You look ravishing!

Rommie: I could break you in half in less than three seconds, Captain.

Dylan: Right.

*****

Harper: Iíll have you know that Iím the best! Most mobile anal muscles in the universe!

Tyr: Really now?

Harper: You better freakiní believe it!

Dylan: Iím so glad to hear that, Seamus.

Harper: Eeep!!

Tyr: I cannot allow you to molest our engineer, Dylan.

Dylan: Why not? Why should you care, Tyr?

Tyr: Because heís mine. Everyone knows that.

Dylan: Since when?

Tyr: Since he told us about hisÖ.talents.

Dylan: Are you prepared to fight for him?

Tyr: Of course.

Dylan: You're in for the fight of your life, Nietzschean.

Tyr: As are you, human.

*****

Harper: Iíd be worried if I were still there.

*****

Crew: What was the deal with this crap, 3eyes? You made us all sound like idiots and sex maniacs!

3eyes: Hey! Youíre not supposed to backtalk me!

Crew: Whatíre going to do, punish us like you did in that ďbad moodĒ drabble?

3eyes: You thought that was punishment?

Andromeda: The Magog Worldship has just appeared on my sensors. Slipstream core and weapons inoperable. Internal defenses inoperableÖ..




The following phrases were written by Mark:

Dylan: Come here you cute lil bas#ard...I wanna pinch those cute little dimpled cheeks!

Harper: I want my Rommie!

Dylan's 'HUNT' is on! He wants hugs and kisses...bad!

Thanks, dude. :) ;)


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