For Better or Worse | By : DharmaCharma Category: G through L > Lost Views: 1267 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own the television show "Lost", nor the characters. I do not profit financially from the writing of this story. |
Ben walked at a brisk pace away from the Wilmington Arms Hotel. He tossed the gun into the alley way, removed his leather gloves and stuffed them into the lining of his coat. He had done it. He had accomplished what he set out to do. On the island, he had made a list of Oceanic flight 815 survivors who may have proved useful, but in the here and now, Ben had a new list. A list of people he intended to exact revenge upon. People who had upset his perfect island life, destroyed the lives of people he loved, and murdered his family. People who had caused him to fall out of favor with Jacob. People whose actions had resulted in his exile from his home. Maybe now that he had crossed every name off the list, he would be allowed to come back home. He didn't even care if Locke stayed in charge, so long as he could get back. He had eliminated all of them, starting at the bottom of the list and working his way right up to the source of all his anguish - Charles Widmore. He retrieved the small notebook and stubby pencil from his coat pocket, opened it up, and crossed "C.W." off the list. He made his way to a crowded street market and pulled out his cell phone. He quickly dialed a number and listened for the man to answer on the other end. "Yes?" Ben smiled, "Sayid? It's finished. I'll no longer be requiring your services." There was a silence on the other end of the line. Ben let the information sink in. Sayid answered, his voice quivering, "Benjamin, I will be forever indebted to you. You have avenged Nadia's death. Thank you, Benjamin. Thank you." Ben paused and said, "I'm glad you are grateful, Sayid, because I do have a favor to ask of you. Can you meet me at the Screaming Neon Casino in Las Vegas at 3:35pm on Thursday?" Sayid became silent again, thought for moment, and replied, "yes. I believe I can. I will see you then. I will do anything you ask of me." "Good, Sayid. That's very good. See you soon." Ben flipped his phone shut, removed the SIM card, and tossed the phone into a dumpster that was nestled between two shops.
Simone had settled back into life in at the Barracks more smoothly than she had anticipated. Locke was a surprisingly good leader. Sure, he made a few mistakes, but who doesn't? Even Ben made mistakes. Ben...the thought of him made Simone's heart physically ache. His absence from the island had not diminished her love for him. If anything, it had strengthened it. It was much to her chagrin that she began to notice the way Locke stared at her when she walked across the courtyard, smoked on her front porch, or at the weekly meetings he had implemented in Ben's absence. It started as a prolonged gaze that progressed into nods and smiles from several yards away and had manifested itself into full-blown contrived "chance" encounters. One such incident that stood out in her mind was the day she had been in the jungle picking mangoes. Locke had silently crept up behind her. "You know," he began, startling her nearly out of her skin. She jumped back, dropping her arm load of fruit. He chuckled as he knelt down to pick up the mangoes, "sorry, kid. Didn't mean to frighten you. Anyway, you know...if you would hold your knife at this angle" bringing his hands up to cup hers and reposition them to demonstrate, "like this, you'd be able to cut those mangoes down a lot more quickly." Simone caught herself blushing. "Thanks, John. You really know your stuff." He smiled, obviously flattered by her compliment. He leaned in, ever so slowly, and whispered in her ear, "you know, if only you were a few years older." He grinned slyly and then disappeared into the jungle. How Simone hated it when he'd catch her off-guard like that! Something about it, about him, creeped her out. If only Ben were still here. He'd watch out for her. He promised her he would after Bea had been killed at the Flame.
Once she was certain he was gone, Simone tried John's knife trick. It worked. She hated him being right. She quickly gathered up her small fruit harvest and trekked back to her cottage. She thoughtfully placed the mangoes in a decorative ceramic fruit bowl on her counter. Something about all she had been through had matured her. She began caring more about her home, about herself. She had abandoned her "Screw Me Blue" eyeshadow in favor of more smoky shades, when she bothered to apply makeup at all. She took the time to carefully comb out her long, wavy, chestnut colored locks. She had even cut back on her smoking. And every night, since she'd come back home, she laid in her bed and played with herself thinking about Ben. After each blazing hot climax her eyes would well up with tears and she would cry herself to sleep thinking of how much she missed just seeing him around the island.
The taxi cab rolled up to the curb in front of a garishly painted cinder block building. A half blown out sign over the door flashed, "SC E MI G N ON". Sayid paid the fare for his cab ride, and stepped out into the suffocating, balmy Las Vegas air. The sidewalks were a flurry of tourists, young and old alike, shoving past one another running to the nearest slot machine or Keno venue. Sayid accidentally bumped into an elderly man wearing a "Las Vegas is for Lovers" t-shirt, huge sunglasses, and a straw hat. "Excuse me, sir" Sayid apologized politely. The old man grunted, "fuck you, Osama". Sayid shook his head in dismay and turned to enter the Screaming Neon Casino. The casino was so dark, it took Sayid's eyes a minute to adjust. Once they did, he immediately spotted the familiar silhouette of Benjamin Linus sitting at the bar. He carefully approached Ben from the side. Ben looked up and extended his right hand. Sayid took it in his and gave it a firm shake. "Sayid," Ben started. "It's so good to see you, my old friend." Sayid looked around nervously. With Ben, you never knew what to expect, and you never, ever fully trusted the man. Ben gestured at the empty bar stool beside him, "Please, have a seat. What'll it be?" Sayid shook his head and said, "just water, please." Ben called to the bartender to bring a glass of water. Sayid removed his hat, placing it on the bar and said, "Let's cut to the chase. Why did you ask me to come here, Benjamin? What is this favor you want from me?" Ben smiled, never moving his gaze from Sayid's, and replied, "I need you to come back to the island with me." Sayid's eyes widened with confusion, and horror. "No. NO!" he said emphatically, slamming his fist to the bar to emphasize his point. A drunk man at the other end of the bar lifted his head and looked their way, grimacing. Ben smiled apologetically and waved at him as if to say, "nothing to see here. Go back to being passed out."
Ben leaned in closer and whispered, "Sayid, you promised me you'd do me this favor. You owe me this one. I was the one who got you off the island in the first damn place. Now, tell me, how wonderful has your life been since?" Hot tears sprung up and glazed over Sayid's eyes. A lone tear escaped and trickled down his cheek. Barely choking out a whisper he replied, "I got to spend six of the greatest months of my life with my soul mate." Ben's expression turned to one of sincere sympathy. He patted Sayid on the shoulder and continued, "Sayid, there are problems on the island. It wants us...no, needs us to come back. Locke, and everyone else, is in a lot of trouble, you see. With Nadia gone, what else do you have to stay here for?" Sayid pondered this for a moment and lowered his face into his palms, slowly massaging his temples. "Don't you understand, Sayid? We weren't supposed to leave." Sayid slowly looked up, his eyes meeting Ben's steely gaze once more. It clicked just then. He knew what Ben was talking about. He knew was it was he had to do. "Alright, Benjamin. Let's go back. Right now." Ben chuckled and replied, "not just yet, my friend. The island wants us back. All of us."
"Excuse me? Simone? Would you mind coming over to the Pearl and helping me with something?" Simone dreaded it every time Locke asked her for a favor these days. Any time she could avoid being trapped alone with him was great. Being alone with Locke didn't sit right with her, for some reason. Maybe it was the way he looked at her, or the way he would find excuses to touch her, or the fact that he had blatantly told her if only she was a few years older. It wasn't that he was a bad guy. He just wasn't the guy she wanted to find affection with, is all. Her heart, and body, belonged to Ben. He just didn't know that yet. Even if she could bring herself to be intimate with Locke, it would only be her second choice. He would be like the runner up in a beauty pageant. Not quite the winner. The fact that she had even entertained such a thought disturbed Simone on a very visceral level. She shuddered at the thought and brushed it aside. Maybe she should stop masturbating so much. Maybe the nightly sexual stimulation was causing her to lose her focus, to cloud her good judgment. Maybe it was making her more horny. She shook her head to rid it of the images of her and Locke that had flashed in it and she answered, "sure. Why not?" Locke smiled. "Thanks, kid. I need to grab a few provisions and I'll come by your cottage as soon as we're ready to set out." Simone nodded in agreement and went back to her cottage to wait for him.
She decided it might be a good idea to pee before heading out into the jungle, even though the Pearl had a bathroom. Still, it was a good three hour walk, at the least, and she definitely didn't relish the thought of relieving herself in front of Locke. She studied her reflection as she washed her hands. She reached into the plastic cosmetics organizer on the counter and retrieved a nearly spent tube of mascara. The black substance had clumped up on the end of the wand. Simone sighed, but decided to make the best of it. She coated her lashes and then used her spoolie tool to separate the thick clumps the old mascara had left. She reached for a tube of muted pink lipstick and carefully applied it, rubbing her lips together and smooth it all out. She looked at herself in the mirror once more and smiled. She tousled her hair between her fingers and thought to herself, not bad, Simone. Not bad at all. Oh! What the hell was she thinking? Why on earth would she be dolling herself up to make a trek to the Pearl with Locke? Before she could talk herself into washing that mess off her face, she was startled by a knock at the door. "Simone? It's me, John. You ready, kid?" Simone shouted back, "Yes! Be right there!" She threw on her worn out hoodie, grabbed her pack of smokes and lighter, and met John outside on her porch. He grinned approvingly at her and handed her a bottle of water. "I thought you might get thirsty." "Thanks" Simone replied as she tucked the bottle into her hoodie pocket.
They were mostly silent on the way to the Pearl. Every so often, John would try and make small talk, but realizing Simone wasn't reciprocating he grew quiet. They made it to the clearing where the entrance hatch to the Pearl was. John strained to open it. The months of being untouched had nearly sealed it shut permanently, but Locke was a strong guy and with much grunting and brute force, the hatch door finally swung open. Locke stood upright, let out a deep breath and said, "whew! That was tough. I need to remember to come out here regularly and open and close the hatch door, just to keep it from sticking." He dusted his hands off on his cargo pants and said, "I'll go down ahead of you, kid." Simone nodded and John lowered himself down the ladder. She followed in close behind him. As they reached the bottom, Simone noticed a fluorescent light fixture overhead flickering. "Hang on a second" John commanded. "I'm going to switch from backup power to the main power supply. Stay here." He disappeared around a corner. Moments later, Simone heard a loud "click!" and the lights above hummed loudly and flickered on full power, brightening the entrance tunnel to the Pearl's monitoring room. John emerged from around the corner, smiled at Simone and asked, "ready, kid?" Simone followed him down the tunnel.
In the monitoring station, there were two captain's chairs that swiveled around, an old dot matrix printer, and several tube television monitors recessed into the wall. Simone plopped down into one of the chairs and spun around like a little kid. John smiled at her, amused by her childlike innocence. "So..." Simone began, "What are we here to do, John?" He gestured toward the monitors and said, "I want to remove one of these monitors and take it back to the Barracks. I need the parts." Simone was puzzled, "and why did you need me for this, exactly?" John replied, "well, kid, I need you to hold the monitor in place while I remove the anchor bolts and try and pry it loose from the wall." Simone nodded, "ah. Gotcha." She hopped up from her chair and approached the wall. "Okay," John began, "just hold your hands on it like this and try and keep it from falling out while I work on the bolts. Got it?" Simone placed her hands against the monitor, leaning into it to brace herself. "Got it". Locke's arm brushed against hers as he reached with the socket wrench to try and loosen the one of the bolts. The physical closeness sent a tingle down Simone's body that made her feel uncomfortable. It was't supposed to be this way! She wasn't supposed to actually enjoy Locke's skin brushing against hers. She pushed the thought from her mind and concentrated on the task at hand.
Locke got three of the four corner bolts loosened, but when he went to loosen the fourth one, the monitor broke loose. It was far heavier than Simone had anticipated. It caught her off-guard and she began to fall backwards under the weight of it. Locke's eyes widened as he exclaimed, "Simone! Watch out! Just let it go!" He tried to reach out to move Simone out of the way, but it was too late. Before either of them could react, the monitor came loose from the wall entirely and Simone fell backwards with it. She was able to move to the side, to keep it from crushing her rib cage, but the rough metal edge grazed her left arm, leaving a nasty gash. John rushed to kneel by her side. "Hey, kid? You alright? Oh my, that was scary. I thought you were a goner!" Simone breathlessly laughed. She looked over and was most displeased to see the gaping line torn into the muscular flesh of her bicep. John examined it and quickly said, "don't move. I'm going to try and bandage it until we can get you back to the Barracks for stitches." In a flash, John pulled his t-shirt off over his head and was tearing a strip of material from it to use as a makeshift dressing for her wound. Simone was surprised to see that, for his age, John's body was nice to look at. He had muscles in all the right places and a soft trail of silver, curly hairs that traveled from the center of his chest, down his belly, disappearing into the waistline of his pants. Simone found herself enjoying the sight of him a little too much. She looked away with embarrassment when she realized John had taken notice of her more than lengthy gaze.
With deft expertise, he had dressed her wound and had helped her up and placed her back in the swivel chair. He leaned in toward her, putting his weight on his hands braced against the arms of the chair. He looked her over with a concerned look on his face and asked, "better now, kid?" Simone smiled at him. "Yes, John. Thank you so much." He smiled back. A look of relief and care flashed across his face. Simone couldn't help herself. She slowly brought her face toward his, gently placing a tender kiss on his lips. She felt his stubble brush against her chin and her body was filled with arousal. No, no! This wasn't right! She was supposed to have her first time with Ben in his bed back at his cottage. Not a lusty tryst in the dirty Pearl a hundred feet below the surface of the earth with a man more than twice her age! John pulled away, surprised. "Simone?" he began. A look of confusion filled his face. She wanted it to stop, but her body wouldn't let it. She felt herself being lifted, slowly, to her feet. Her cheek pressed tightly to John's bare chest. He embraced her lovingly. Stroking her hair, letting his hands travel down to the erogenous zone located at the small of her back. His hands tenderly slipped beneath her clothes as he stroked the smooth skin and baby fuzz hair just above her pantyline. With his free hand he cupped her beneath her chin, gently tilting her face upward so he could kiss her again. This time it was more passionate. Simone let John's hot tongue slowly slip between her lips and massage hers. She melted into his arms, abandoning all hope that this would have been her moment with the man she had loved for so long. John would simply have to do. She'd waited long enough, and Ben was gone and never coming back anyway. At least John wanted her. Ben didn't even act as if he cared one iota for her.
Simone pulled away from John, breathless, filled with conflicting, even painful, emotions. John asked her, "are you okay, Simone? I don't want to do anything that will upset you. I care about you and respect you so much. I'd rather die than have you lose respect for me and hate me." Simone wanted to cry, but fought the urge, as she fell more deeply into John's arms. "John, I-I don't love you. I want to love you, but I just don't yet. But I do want you. I want you right here, right now." John stared deeply into her eyes. "Are you absolutely certain this is what you want, Simone? Because I don't commit to anything halfway. If we do this, I want to be with you forever. I don't want to share some dirty moment in this bunker and then we go back up top, back to the Barracks, and then pretend we barely know each other. Like it's business as usual." Simone couldn't fully comprehend the gravity of what John was telling her. She didn't even know if she cared. All she knew was that there was a heat searing between her legs and a wet spot in the crotch of her panties that was getting very uncomfortable. John kissed her gently on the forehead. "Simone, I know you say you don't love me, but I love you. I've loved you for a long time. Since I first laid eyes on you. I know you love someone else, but I want to have the opportunity to prove myself to you. To earn your love." Simone pulled away and took a step back. "John, you can't earn my love. It belongs to someone else, just as you said." John moved toward her, his body glistening with sweat, looking at her with the utmost seriousness and whispered, "don't tell me what I can't do". Simone was gripped with fear. It was a fear that turned her on. John meant business, and she liked it.
John kissed her once more, this time grabbing her hand and placing it on the bulge that had formed in his pants. "This is for later" he stated. "Now, we have to get you back home and stitched up." Simone was so aggravated! How could she walk all the way back to the Barracks when her legs were wobbly with arousal? She grabbed his hand, used her free hand to pull the elastic waist of her pants away from her body, and slipped his hand inside. He looked shocked as his fingers slicked the thick, slippery wetness that coated her opening and slit. "This is for now" Simone demanded. John shook his head. "Simone, I don't want it to be this way. I want it to be special" Simone shook her head and cried out, "for fuck's sake, John! I'm so hot and bothered right now! If you want to wait until later to fuck, fine, but could you at least play with my pussy, get me off, and relieve this ache that has been building down there since your arm brushed against mine when we were working on that monitor? Fuck the romance! Fuck it being special. Fuck it all! Please, John! I need to cum, now!" John's eyes filled with intense desire and he pressed his mouth bruisingly against Simone's. His tongue plunged deep into her throat, nearly choking her. He spun her body around, turning her back to him. "Bend over the table. Now!" he hissed in her ear. Simone obeyed. With one hand, John pressed Simone's body down against the table that held the ancient dot matrix printer. For a split second, Simone wondered how many years worth of dust had collected on the antique of a machine, but her thoughts were quickly interrupted when John's other hand forced its way down the front of her pants, cupping her virgin mound in his palm.
For a moment, John's hand remained stationary. The suspense was agonizing to Simone. She felt the bulge in his pants pressed against her right ass cheek. He pressed it against her so hard it hurt. He leaned over her back, brushed her hair away from her neck and breathed in her ear, "you want me to fuck the romance? Fuck it being special? Huh? Is this really how you want it, kid? You want it all dirty and in a hole in the fucking ground? Hurried, with your back to me so I don't even have to look you in the eyes when you cum on my fingers? Is it?" he demanded. Simone wasn't even sure what she wanted at this point. All she knew was that if John's hand gripping her vulva as if it were a six-pack of beer didn't start moving, she was going to have to push him away and do it herself. She couldn't take it any more. John tightened his grip on her delicate private flesh and grunted into her neck, "is this why you painted your face all up? Huh? Because you wanted me to fuck you like some cheap whore? Is that why you have to lie to me, and yourself, and say you don't love me? That you don't want it to be special?". He hit it. The chink in her armor. Hot tears rolled down her cheeks. He loosened his grip and she turned to face him. Her cheeks flushed with both arousal and shame. "You got me, John" she began, her voice quivering. "I do love you and I do want my first time to be special, and I want it to be with you. It's just that, I never thought I deserved that. Please, take me home, John. I want to go home...with you." All this time she thought her feelings of unease around John were because it was wrong. In that moment Simone realized it was her own fear of letting go of Ben, forever, that made her feel confused. All along she allowed herself to love a man who would never love her back, because she knew it was safer that way. John tenderly wiped the tears from her face with his fingers and kissed her gently on the mouth. The hot ache between her thighs subsided as he put his arm around her and said, "come on, my love. I'm taking you home, now" before leading her to opening of the hatch.
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